We Need To Talk with Paul C. Brunson - We're Talking Parenting Tips with Jo Frost

Episode Date: May 28, 2026

Jo Frost, known to millions as Supernanny, joins us for an honest conversation about modern parenting, discipline, screen time and the pressure families are carrying today. Jo reflects on why children need boundaries as much as love, why parents must take responsibility for the devices they put in their children’s hands, and how discipline can be firm without becoming fear-based. She speaks openly about timeouts, smacking, emotional safety, social media, racism, gun violence and the anxiety many parents feel trying to raise children in an increasingly complicated world. Jo also shares why the most important work starts with conversation: between parents, partners and children. We’re Talking Parenting (00:00) Intro (00:35) Paul Asks Jo Questions from the Suggestion Box (01:39) Jo's Thoughts on Navigating Screen Time with Children (05:12) The Philosophy Behind the 'Naughty Step' (09:56) Paul and Jo's Thoughts on Spanking (11:34) What Would Jo Like to Say to the Supernanny Haters? (12:53) What is the Difference Between Discipline in the UK Versus the US? (17:11) Paul and Jo Discuss the Importance of Talking with Your Partner About Parenting Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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Wayfair, every style, every home. Welcome to We're Talking. In this episode, Joe Frost, known to millions as supernanny, joins us for a powerful conversation about modern parenting, discipline, screen time, and the conversations every family needs to have. This week, we're talking parenting. We reached out to our community, let them know that you're going to be here, and many questions were sent in. Oh, really? You did that.

So can we, can we, can we go through some questions? Absolutely. All right. So now I want to ask you if you know what this is right here. Your suggestion box. Oh, for the kids. All right. So this is your idea.

So if you can to tell everyone, what's the importance of a suggestion box? So it gets used in different ways. But predominantly it was to bring children to a place that felt it difficult to articulate emotionally what they needed from their families. Okay. An opportunity to write that down. I see. So what we've done is somewhat of that. What we've done is these are not suggestions but questions.

Okay. But they have all gone into the box. First question is, what's your advice on navigating screen time with children? I know that we have to hold a standard and hopefully, as we speak, laws that change that so that we hold big tech and companies responsible. But I want to say this, and I think it's going to be discomfort for a lot of families, parents have got to take ownership of that. They have to, meaning we can't just say, oh, well, our child's using the screen, you know, that's what they do now. Paul, I'm watching six-month-old babies holding phones.

Yeah, restaurants all the time. You see it all the time. I would encourage and suggest strongly to so many parents to understand that when you choose to put a phone in your six-month, nine-month, two-year-olds hands, what you are doing is prohibiting their development. You are. And that's not to take away the fact that parents need a break. But what do you think parents were doing before 2010? It's okay for children to cry. It's okay for children to be unhappy.

It's okay for children to behave the way they do their children. You know, I strongly want to encourage parents to recognize that a lot of damage is being done. You know, so how are we going to look at how we limit screen time, right, with algorithms and safety, safeguarding and also recognizing and also recognize. that these shows are made differently, right? They design differently, flick, flick, flick, flick, like Vegas. Bing, ping, ping, ping, ping, right? And how are we going to look as a family when they're appropriate to use?

How long we use them for? And the dialogue that we're going to have before we give consent for our children to have them. And most parents will say to me, I don't want my kids to get left out. I'm worried about my children being left out. You know, and that cannot be. there cannot be the excuse of why then we throw our children into rooms we would never if they were just out on the street. Because we're leaving our children underprotected

and yet in the real life we're being overprotective. Like trust me, my kids wouldn't have had any social media until they're at least 17. I won't do it. How can somebody clearly distinguish whether this child has ADHD due to the fact that it may be genetic or environmental factors. Because they show up very similar. Yes. They show up very similar.

And that's the point that I'm trying to make. And I'm old enough and I've been in this industry long enough, this parental game, and I've seen it come around twice. This is the second time I've seen it come around now. Goodness. Where we had, you know, where we had parents, That was very strict and then very lenient and soft and then coming strict and now soft again. You know, timeouts were demonized.

You know, I modified the 1900s timeouts. Yes. You know, nothing like that. But again, blanket social media as if timeouts were demonized. And your modification on the timeout Is that the step? Yeah. Yes.

Or a space. Or a space. You know, at the time when you saw Supernanny, it was put on a step, right? It was a step or a mat or it could be if you were in a living room, it might have just been that chair. You know? To reset. But again, the blanket message went out there as, oh, it's abandoning. That's not abandonment.

Being in the same room and three feet away. There's a space there for a child to sit there and you're here. That's not abandonment. You know, I think we've got to a point. We've really got to be careful about the language that we're using. Oh, yeah. It's extreme. You know, so in disclosure for myself and my wife, we used timeouts.

Or should I say, we used. We have a 15-year-old now. No more timeouts. But we use them profusely. We use them. and found them to be very effective. Because you were emotionally intelligent with your children too. And you see, if you are a parent who is not Ying and Yang, right?

So my methods, you know, call it the Frost method, right? Okay. The Frost method is to be able to emotionally connect with your child, but to be grounded in your communication so that you can instill healthy boundaries to reset the circumstance at the time. You cannot keep thinking to yourself, oh, I'm going to do a timeout. I'm going to keep doing a timeout

to control the child to get them to do something. A timeout will not teach a child how to use a knife and fault properly. Practice will. So what are the steps to an effective timeout? The steps to an effective timeout is to recognize first and foremost your values, your family values,

understanding what's a deal breaker for you. So know your values first, what's acceptable, what isn't, okay, as parents raising your children and teach your children the importance of connecting in understanding what it looks like to be kind to another human being, what it looks like to have manners and etiquette and sit at a table, to be considerate of friends when they come around to play.

Connect with your kid first, with your child first. Teach them. And then when you see the behavior that's been crossed, the rule that's been broken, because boundaries are about us, right? You uphold your boundary. and upholding that boundary may look like this is unacceptable, this is not okay, and at this moment, you know, we're going to be doing a time out.

So I always teach families to give a child a warning first, right? Because it allows a child to make a decision. Now, some parents will say, and some experts will argue, well, they don't really know. They don't know how to make that decision. But I think we underestimate children greatly. Because I know children that exactly know how to get what they want because they've been taught by their parents. Yes. Right?

Yes. And they're young. Yes. And they're young. Yes. Right? And they're, oh, my child, they just can't sit down for five minutes. Have you ever watched a child sit down five minutes for a chocolate lolly?

All the time. All the time. You know, like we underestimate children. So the steps are a warning calmly, right, at eye level. And we let go. We let go of that. We've said to them, we don't want you. You climb on the tops of the counters at the kitchen.

It's dangerous. You need to get down. You need to stop doing that. Okay, that's enough. And Joe, why is eye level important? Because I believe the body language speaks more so than sometimes what we're saying. So I want alignment. I want what you say to align with how your body is.

So the importance of body language and the integrity of your word must be in alignment. What I want children to feel is the sense of calm authority. Because we're there to guide our children. Okay. Okay. You know, I want them to sense that. Like, oh, you know, mommy said I can't do that. Okay.

You know, in the same way, well, she said I could do that. The integrity of your word. Just on that note, too, is because you talked about the importance of your child, always feeling safe in your presence. Something that I'm hoping that this is. goes away as quickly as possible, but it still seems that it exists in many places of the world is spankings, beatings, slapping, etc. Yes, I'd like it to be banned.

It is banned in other countries, Scotland and Wales and other places in the world. I would like the UK to ban spanking, smacking children. They may be 18 months, two years. They are a whole human being. If we did that to another adult, there would be. severe consequences for doing so. And so why are we in a space where we're even having a discussion

about a parent who has the privilege to raise another human in this world to hit, to hit them? That's about compliance and control. We already know, we know the evidence out there, we've got the science out there, we know enough of the damage

that that can cause in the relationship. I would love to do. see that law changed in Parliament. Okay. And I do know that there, I do know that there has been action last year with respects to that coming up in the Houses of Commons and in Parliament about banning that and I would like to see that continue. Yes.

You know, so we get to a place of that. I'm right with you. I'm right with you. All right. Next question is, what do you say to the people who question you giving parenting advice? when you do not have children? I don't, well, does a doctor need to have cancer to treat cancer? You know, again, it's very, it's a very sort of egotistical standpoint

that you have to give birth to a child to be able to have any say in what is good for another human being and how they are raised. You know, what does that say for those that adopt children in the world? For those that have, you know, haven't biologically given birth? You know, what does it say about those parents? Yes. So, you know, again, they're entitled to their opinion. But I see it more as defence.

You know, I see it more as sort of talking and becoming a mirror and then people are just sort of intellectually lazy in, find in a negative response to that, right? Yes. I think we have two more. That's it. Okay. Oh, this is a great one.

What is the difference between discipline in the UK versus the U.S.? So a lot of people will say, Paul, why are you in the UK? Like, you know, I'll always get this. Why are you in the UK? Where we lived in the United States, we did not know if our child. would come back home alive. Like there was an open question mark if they were to go out, would they be able to, would they be able to come back, right?

Absolutely. Specifically as a result of gun violence, right? This was a question that we had. And then you add on to that racism. Correct. With gun violence. And that increases the likelihood specifically of my black child. Correct.

Not coming back home. Correct. And then we get to the UK. And yes, the UK has. Lots of problems. Yes. But that specific problem was not at the same level, not at the same magnitude. And it became not even a question for us at that moment in time.

And I don't think it would be for me at all. You know? Because I've watched my husband be profiled, spread eagle, you know, in a nice part of America. right? I say nice part right? Because I'm what I say it's a nice part of America and then you realize what they're talking about is you know a part of America where there's hardly any black people living

right? You know I just I just want to keep it real here Paul yes you know living in this country right now in America is extremely difficult and extremely frustrating but this you know this

this conversations are difficult conversation because it was only several days ago that there was a woman shot. She's a mother. She's a mother. Absolutely. You know what? I'm so glad that you're talking about this because I think if you are not, if you are not someone who loves children, if you're not someone who's aware of children,

this probably doesn't hit your radar. But you know that there is not one morning when this is in London, right, where my children are going off to school where I'm not consciously aware where I feel my stress level elevated just in the process of them going to their bus and then ensuring that they're at school. And in the moment that they, I get that text that they're at school, stress level drops, I can now really go about my day. But then on their way back, it's stress level goes up. Yeah.

Can they get back to the house? They're back at the house. Stress level goes back. And that's every day, every day, every day, every day. And in the UK, you know, as in America, because again, there used to be that moment, maybe 20 years ago, you'd go, oh, it's a little bit behind and then it's going to catch up. But now with social media, one thing goes out, the whole world, you know, sees it. And that has been a very good thing, right? Because it's been able to show a lot of negative and some justice that needed to be taken place or justice that isn't being taken place, right?

However, it doesn't diminish the fact that we have parents living in both countries with an enormous amount of anxiety. And that just, man, that punishes the body. It takes the toll. It takes its toll on the body, you know? Over time, you think, oh, it's okay, you know. And then over time, over time, it just chips away. and that chips away at the decisions you make and the amount of energy that you have and, you know, the projection then on your family, you know, it's difficult for families.

It's really difficult for families. And at a time, but it's really difficult for families, I'm asking families to dig deeper, to dig deeper and go, am I just going to watch this all pass, or am I going to take my family and put it on the map and go, these are the decisions we're making for 2026. We need to talk. We need to talk. We need to sit around a table, you and I. We need to talk about our kids. We need to talk about the decisions we're going to make from here to June. We need to talk about what we're going to do to make sure that actually we are close as a family, but we've also got our own space. We need to offload ourselves.

We need to be in a space with our partners where we can just be vulnerable. You know, I love the idea of this. But I'm fucking petrified, you know, and I will fight too for now for our family. But boy, it scares me. I hear you. Like, I hear you. It's all right to feel scared because I feel the same way as well. What are we going to do about it, babes?

We're going to do about it. What will we do about it together? Yes. Like, let's talk about this. You have to talk. Yes. You have to talk. Yeah, it's truly where it begins and ends.

It really is. is in the conversation. And I've always believed that the harder the conversations we're able to have, right? Just the higher quality of life we get. We have to have those conversations. Not all of us know what to say. I don't know all the time what to say. Sometimes I'll stumble, you know, and I'm well-versed with communication.

Yes. You know, and the levels of what that means. But, you know, sometimes we can't find. words for the depth of what our heart feels at times. Sometimes we just can't. But is the energy there that that other person can feel that? Is the intention true? Is it genuine?

Is it loving? Because if it is, whatever's going to be said, we know it was coming from a good place. Yes. Because people generally want to do good. Yes. They do want to do good. Yes. They might have not said the right thing and we can be forgiving, you know, to our true friends.

I know they're the obvious interests at heart. You know, they love her some else a bit. But, you know, they meant well. The intention, intentionality is everything. It is. And it's interesting because in the romantic relationship space, it's always about intentionality. Same thing with parenting.

It is. Same thing with parenting. Because if you get that right, then your children, they're very forgiving. Look how many times parents grew up unconditionally, your children. Hi. Yeah, they are still there.

Like, all right, dad. You know? But can you say, can you say, Can you apologize? Can you apologize to your children? Can you turn around and say, you know what? I just, I just lost it. And I'm sorry. And I'm so sorry. Like, do you know what? I lost my call. You know what's really resonating with me is as I'm reflecting on the conversation we had is for those new parents, for those who haven't yet had the child but are pregnant, thinking about the child, just had the child, right? This is going to be so valuable. Well, for, you know, I've, I've literally, I've had that. Like, I've had, you know, I remember I was in Chicago airport and a couple came up to me.

And they went, oh my God, we've watched your shows. We've watched our shows all the time. Like, I just, look, I just got engaged. Like, we watch your shows. We're going to have children. We're going to have children. Like, what would you, what advice would you give us? And I'm like, well, first and foremost, congratulated.

Right? Right. Talk. All I would say to you right now, in this stage, talk to each other. talk to each other about how you were raised, what you loved about it, what you didn't love about it, you know, how you want to raise your own children, what's important

to you, what do those values look like? Like, you work in this relationship department Paul, like, do you know how much time and effort and talking when you're dating someone? Like, you're all there, you're taking a mouth, you're on the phone, no, you put down the phone, no, you put down the phone, no, you put down the phone,

no, you put down the phone, and you know, you're all hyped up and you're talking and you go out for dinner And then like marriage happens. And then crickets. Like crickets. Like everything stops. And you're like, how? Yes.

Right? But you have to also, because again, I'm putting in the decades of seeing this, you have to also realize that there has been media that has also conditioned that's changing now, women. Like you would see in magazines, oh, this is how you capture the man of your dreams.

And this is how you, you know, don't ask him about how many children he may want. Or don't ask him, you know, about this. And you're like, no, ask. Because if you're sitting in front of somebody that can't answer those questions or is offended by those questions, thank you very much. That was really nice. Goodbye. Thank you very much.

I think I'm going a second date now. You know. I mean, to the point of even when you were talking about, you know, you're talking about the importance of that emotional connection is like, you have to talk. You know, you talked about we need to talk, right? What do we need to do in 2020? It's like, this is the through. The through is in the conversation.

The through is have the courage to show up. And when you show up, you will be rewarded always. You will be rewarded 100% of the time. And if you want to hear the full unfiltered stories from today's guest, you can check them out on the We Need to Talk page. Drop a like, leave a comment, and hit subscribe. See you next week.