We Need To Talk with Paul C. Brunson - "Why I Don't Speak to my Brother!" Harry Jowsey EXCLUSIVE on Grief & Fame

Episode Date: February 17, 2026

Harry Jowsey opens up about ØnlyFans, Too Hot To Handle, Perfect Match and why he’s ready to go from Boyfriend Material to Husband Material. The reality TV star gets honest about making millions fr...om subscribers, how porn made him unfaithful, and why his past romances fell apart. He reveals how he “played” Too Hot To Handle for screen time, why Perfect Match exposed his worst traits and what was really happening behind the chaos. Harry also speaks about grief, losing friends to suicide and shares the deeply personal story of his father’s assisted dying - their complicated relationship, what it was like to say goodbye, and how that experience reshaped his priorities, faith and understanding of love. From chaos and controversy to commitment and consequence, this is Harry like you’ve never seen him before. Harry Jowsey, We Need To Talk This conversation includes sensitive topics including suicide. Support charities here: CALM: https://g2ul0.app.link/uULaUXcM3Nb MIND: https://g2ul0.app.link/gbuRaxjM3Nb (00:00) Intro (02:36) What Was Harry’s Childhood Like in Australia? (08:16) What Did Harry Want to Be Growing Up? (09:44) How Harry Was Cast in His First Reality TV Show (12:29) How Harry Was Cast in Too Hot to Handle (13:57) What Did Harry Want to Achieve on Too Hot to Handle? (21:16) Why Harry Thinks He Thrives on Reality TV (22:15) The Most Shocking Behind-the-Scenes Moment From Too Hot to Handle (23:41) The Growth of Harry’s Social Media Presence After Reality TV (29:18) Why Harry Is Still Doing Reality TV (32:59) Harry Reflects on the Versions of Himself Onscreen (36:25) What Harry Would Change About His Time on Perfect Match (38:46) Harry Explains His New Show ‘Let’s Marry Harry’ (42:57) Harry’s Relationship With Alex Cooper (46:11) Shopify Ad (47:22) Harry Breaks Down His OnlyFans and His Changing Feelings About It (52:33) How Much Money Has Harry Made From OnlyFans? (54:41) Lessons Harry Learned From His Exes (58:58) Harry Explains His Complicated Relationship With His Brother (01:07:51) Harry’s Experience of His Father’s Assisted Death (01:20:38) What Has Harry Learned About Grief? (01:26:10) Most Memorable Conversation (01:30:02) Paul’s Takeaways Follow me here: https://www.instagram.com/needtotalk  https://www.tiktok.com/@weneedtotalkpod Support Harry here:Instagram: www.instagram.com/harryjowsey TikTok: www.tiktok.com/@harryjowsey Sponsored by: Shopify: www.shopify.co.uk/needtotalk  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Transcript
Discussion (0)
Starting point is 00:00:00 You said this place was steps from the water. We just haven't found the steps yet. How much did we save? Enough. Enough to get lost! Or you could book a stay with Hilton. Welcome to your oceanfront room. Just steps from the water.
Starting point is 00:00:16 The Hilton sale is on now. Book on Hilton.com or the Hilton app and save up to 20% to get the stay you expected. When you want savings, not surprises. It matters where you stay. Hilton, for the stay. Good sleep is everything. That's why Ali's science back support is made with a blend of melatonin and L-D-Nine for both kiddos and grown-ups.
Starting point is 00:00:39 So when your mind won't switch off, you've got something that can help. You're racing thoughts and restless nights won't stand a chance. Find Ollie's sleep solutions for the whole family at ollie.com. That's O-L-L-L-Y.com. Those days were difficult because it's already scary. He's already got cancer. When you hear your father is considering assisted dying, what do you think?
Starting point is 00:01:03 Dude, choked the handle, perfect match, dancing with the stars, then let's marry Harry. You walked away with 2.4 million followers. Four and a half. Oh, shut the fuck up. Never get that wrong again, brother. Here's where I want to go with this. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:01:21 Only fans. You became one of the highest grossing male creators. How much have you made? $1.5.5. Pretty good, huh? I'm gonna leave with my heart and I'm gonna keep him strapped away. I just broke 13 months of being sober. I was going through the worst breakup I ever went through.
Starting point is 00:01:38 There was a really bad version of myself. What about with any of the ladies, would you have done anything differently? You know what? Even after my last breakup, which was a big one that really messed me around, the purpose of me doing these shows was to make my friends laugh. My friends aren't laughing. They're actually not here anymore.
Starting point is 00:01:55 I had three people in total that I'd lost to suicide. Now your father recently passed away. I remember he looked at the doctor and said, wow. Grief, it never goes away and I never wanted to go away. I want to always feel when I think about that. What a gift, life. I've seen you open up here like never before. There's one more topic that I want to get into.
Starting point is 00:02:17 I saw you say you are open to now being married. I am. Before we begin, I just want to say if you enjoy this conversation, be sure to like it. Be sure to comment about what you appreciated. and be sure to subscribe. It helps us to bring more guests than you want to see. Harry Jousie, we need to talk. Can I say, also, you're the first words to start clapping on that?
Starting point is 00:03:01 Really? Yeah. Oh, that was good. I was like, this guy's a good host. And that's it. Goodbye. That's it. We're done. Man, yeah. I'm very excited to talk to you. Rob, I'm very excited to talk to you. Because as we were just saying, right before, I did that little opener is, I did that little opener is,
Starting point is 00:03:15 is I feel like you've just really started your career, but it's already been historic. Historic. It's been historic. Yeah. And so you've gone through a lot, and I want to unpack as much of it as we can. The story begins in Australia, though.
Starting point is 00:03:34 Yeah. All right. So tell me what did you feel like the environment was like for you in Australia growing up? Who were you growing up with? Oh, bro. I was such a little sausage, to be honest. Like, I was such a, like, a little class clown, I think would be the best way to put it. Like, growing up in Australia, I had my full brother, I've got four half-sisters, both my parents.
Starting point is 00:03:59 We had a very good upbringing. Obviously, there's in any family. There's a lot of highs and lows and all that stuff. But, yeah, I grew up in a very small town, Australia called Yipoon. Literally, country coastal town, it was epic. I could take the horses to the beach every weekend. and ride in the water there'd never be anyone on the beach.
Starting point is 00:04:17 It was awesome. Like, just such a blessed upbringing. But with me being a class clown, I was not very good at school. And I ended up getting kicked out of all the schools in Australia and I had to go to school in New Zealand. Okay. So you said, all of the schools.
Starting point is 00:04:32 Yeah, no one would take me. Tell me like, this guy sucks. Are you serious? Yeah. And then that school, I got kicked out of it too. Did you? Yeah. What were...
Starting point is 00:04:40 Okay, I mean, like I said, epic. There we go. Yeah. what were you doing to get kicked out of of the school? Brother, everything. Really? Everything. No, I was just, I guess I never really had, I wasn't really good at, like, following instructions.
Starting point is 00:04:59 I was like, I'll just figure it out. And it wasn't very, like, I don't really care enough at school. I think the biggest thing for me is, like, just want to have fun. Like, what can I do to make my friends laugh? And I guess, like, because I was in boarding school for both those schools, And I just like, yeah, just was always up to something no good. Like we would, and this is terrible, what would make chlorine bombs, which kids should not know how to make those. Wait, wait, wait, so what's the chlorine?
Starting point is 00:05:28 I mean, let's not get the specifics, but it's like chlorine and then you like... It's like milk and stuff, it's weird and we throw it in toilets and we like blow it up. And so you don't want that at your school. No one wants that anywhere. That's an act of a terrorist. It is. It is. That shouldn't be at any school.
Starting point is 00:05:44 So me and my friends would do that and then would make like little firecrackers and put them in like subway rolls and like throw them in the middle of school. Like there was just a lot of like just a young kid that was just wanted to just always be naughty. So what I've noticed with a lot of people, not saying this is you, but with a lot of people who seek attention at school or seek attention when they're outside of the home, it's because they're not getting the attention they need inside the home. You know, I think recently I've definitely started to analyze that a little bit more. I think going, yeah, like diving into that with my therapist, like just trying to figure out like when the last time I heard like I'm proud of you or things like that. It's not really like not to be a sob story, whatever else. I was thinking about how I would show up for my kids in the future and like how like what
Starting point is 00:06:35 What did I love about my parents? What do I don't love about my parents? But, you know, granted, greatest people have ever known. You know, if it wasn't for them, it wouldn't be for me. So shout out to the goats. All of us adults, we are who we are because, or in part, because of who we were as a child and how we saw love. So when you reflect back, were you ever told, I love you?
Starting point is 00:07:02 I'm proud of you. there's there's obviously days where that should have been said but that's the thing is like I'm thinking about it I'm like no like not like I can't say like oh there was this day where they were like that's that's my boy I'm proud of you like and I'm sure my mom will call me and
Starting point is 00:07:23 we did say that then or whatever else but it's just like specific moments I can't really like go like oh yeah like I got a pass on this because there also wasn't many things that I was doing that warranted it like hey i'm so proud of you like i'm always being naughty at school whatever else so and to speak on like the the love thing as well i that was one of the biggest things i realized in therapy like after my last breakup which was a few years ago like a big one that really messed me around was that i was like always always craving chaos in relationships because that's what i thought love was or like oh i see you know my parents clash heads and i'm like oh that's
Starting point is 00:08:03 exactly what I need in this relationship to like feel love or feel seen or whatever else. And I think after like the years of therapy and trying to like figure out why nothing has worked out or why it always feels like there's a battle going on, it's like, well, that's because that's what I think love is and that's, you know, maybe I'm picking also people that have had a similar experience. And we just think like this is love, but it's like, no, we're actually really toxic for each other. No, to that point. And I think everyone needs to understand this is that we typically look for who we believe we are, right? So, for example, if you have lots of self-doubt, normally you're going to end up with
Starting point is 00:08:41 someone who has lots of self-doubt. Yeah. Right. So it's because that's what you feel as safe. Right? You're like, oh, okay, I'm familiar with that. Yeah. You doubt yourself.
Starting point is 00:08:52 Oh, yeah, I doubt myself. That's, I'm safe with that, right? Whereas that's super unhealthy. That's not good. Don't do that. Sounds like you've been there. Yeah. Also, like, I'm going on dating shows.
Starting point is 00:09:03 So, like, brother, I'm a lost cause. I don't know. We're going to get to that. That's part of the epic that we're going to get to. At that age, what did you want to be? What did you want to aspire to become professionally? You know, I had no idea. I think the goal was to take over the family business.
Starting point is 00:09:24 So I went and did a gap year, which was the best thing I've ever done. And I would want to have kids, I would tell them, like, you've got to have a break. You got to go and figure out who you are. So I went through the UK, had like eight months. I could save my money in eight months, like just backpacking and did a Kentucky tour around. It was awesome. Best thing I ever did. And then I came back and applied for university as an adult.
Starting point is 00:09:45 And I was doing a double in business and art. And with that intention of let's complete this and then let's go back to the family business. Because my brother was at university for engineering. And then he decided he wanted to be a DJ. which is pretty, pretty the usual way to go about it. So then he's, that he just, I think he dropped out. I think he's got a degree. But, and then, yeah, that was a bit of my story.
Starting point is 00:10:13 But I ended up not going through with it either. I was walking my dog. And I was like, oh, I, I'm not happy. I'm not good at following orders here. Like, I don't want someone to teach me about business when they don't even have a business. Like, I was kind of just like, in that, like, angry at every. thing and um that day like literally like right away my friend from high school let's go helen divine she tagged me in a post for the show called heartbreak island she said you'd be perfect for
Starting point is 00:10:44 literally it was the universe wanted it to happen i remember just like sending in like photos of me and my undies literally didn't care whatever else i'm like i'm going to make my friends laugh like that's what i'm going to do i'm going to make my friends laugh and then literally it was in like three days I'm on the flight, going to Fiji, going to film a show. And the first time I ever manifested anything, I remember laying in bed and I could feel it, like I could feel it inside me. I was like, I'm winning this show. Nothing's going to stop me.
Starting point is 00:11:11 Like, I could feel it in my whole being. And I won it. And you won the show? Yeah. And that show was, where was that show broadcast? New Zealand. New Zealand. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:11:20 Heartbreak Island. Yeah. And don't watch it. Look, and I'm going to talk shit. So long ago. but I don't even know the show concept. I think they're just to go like island, people dating, maybe Survivor, whatever else, let's just throw out of the wall and figure it out.
Starting point is 00:11:39 Like it was one of those shows that had literally no compass. Yeah, we didn't know what was going on. But that was your first show. That was the one. So in that first show, were you thinking that you would be helping other people, you would be making other people laugh, that you wanted to pursue this as a career? or was fun. No, it was, the goal was make my friends laugh and make myself laugh. Like, no, I was purposeless, I think, at university. I was being told that that's what I should do.
Starting point is 00:12:08 I should be, I should go to, you have to go to university. You have to do this. Like, family business. Like, you should do that. And, um, and I think it was in the pursuit of making my dad proud, to be honest, because he would always pump it up at my brother's at university. And my sister went back for university. Like, he would always pump it up. So I think I was in the pursuit of making him proud, but not making myself proud. So then once I did, once I did that show, and I saw, like, people, my friends calling me, like, why would you do that?
Starting point is 00:12:37 That was cool, because I'm like, oh, people, I actually don't care if you're laughing at me or with me, as long as you're laughing. Like, that's the goal. And so after that show. But can I ask, though, how did your parents respond to that show? Oh, they're just like, he's so funny. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:12:52 Oh, really? Yeah, yeah, no, because it's, it's like cool brownie points with their pants. with their friends. So, like, they, they couldn't see it originally in Australia because it had it, it wasn't airing over there. But when it did, like, and it was in the newspaper and stuff, like, it was, that was cool. Like, that was a cool moment where they're like, oh, wow, like, this is, this is something.
Starting point is 00:13:11 But then when, uh, so after that show, I had that itch. I was like, I have to do another one. Like, this is so fun. Like, I love this stuff. I love entertainment. I was applying for everything. I have a UK passport. So I'm like, I was going through the ranks for Love Island, UK.
Starting point is 00:13:25 Okay. And I was meant to be on it. What year was this? I think it was the Tommy Fury year. Okay. Oh my God. This is... And Molly Mae.
Starting point is 00:13:33 As I was applying for that, the guy who was doing it, Sam King casting, love him. He was like, hey, we have this other show. Can't tell you who it's for or what it is. You have to trust me that it's way better for you and figure it better. And I was like, okay, sweet. No idea. And then I fly out to Mexico. Like, my friends were freaking out.
Starting point is 00:13:52 Like, you don't know who it's for. Just signed a contract for an entitled dating show. Like, no clue. Okay. We get to Mexico and, um, my producer's his to me now, and she's like, this is for Netflix. And I was like, okay. It doesn't phase you. Yeah, I was like, I don't have a Netflix account.
Starting point is 00:14:08 Is that going to be good? And they're like, the biggest streaming platform on the planet. I'm like, oh, well, sounds pretty good. Like, am I still going to be on TV? Like, yeah, but it's, the streaming's, I don't know, whatever. I don't care. It's like one of their first ever reality shows. So it was like super top secret.
Starting point is 00:14:25 And I'm like, I literally don't care. I just want to have fun. So then that show happened and that aired in COVID, which was obviously a horrible time. But to be on a TV show, the greatest thing that could have ever happened. Because everyone's at home. Everyone's watching a show. And everyone wants something to complain about. And that was this guy.
Starting point is 00:14:43 And that was you. So too hot to handle, you don't know what the show is. Do you know what, so what is your objective, though, with the show? Is it still make my friends laugh? meme be a meme that was a that was a goal that was it yeah i remember just like because my friend my best friend christian who was also from the first show i did and we're living together he's like dude this meme stuff that was like early on it's like this meme stuff like if you become a meme that's the goal and i'm like okay i'm trying to figure out how to become a meme so i went in with like random things
Starting point is 00:15:16 to say and like a handshakes for the boys like it was very strategic like i made the first day with the guys because I was the only one there, oh, I think maybe another guy, but only one there that had done a show before. So I knew at the end of this, we're not going to be friends. We're not going to like each other. We're all big personalities. We're all going back to different parts of the world. First show with like an international cast, too. So I don't really care about those people.
Starting point is 00:15:38 So I told all the guys, look, in the interviews, I'm talking shit about you. Just remember that. You're probably going to feel some type way when you like watch it back. So just remember if talk shit about me because I'm going in on you. And they're like, no way, we're all going to be friends. I was like, I promise we won't be. I'm not going to be a friend after this. I've got friends and I'm good on this.
Starting point is 00:15:56 So I think that's what helped me too, because then as soon as they sit down in the interview, they're like, Carrie's dragging me. I probably wasn't even. I was probably crying about something else. So it was just like trying to plant, like just trying to be strategic to make sure that I was guaranteed screen time.
Starting point is 00:16:12 Yes. Because you don't know what you get on these shows. You know what one is, thank you for being honest about that. Yeah. You know what I mean? Because, I mean, I've done a million reality TV shows now. Not as the person, but more so as the host, right?
Starting point is 00:16:24 Okay, good. Yeah, that's probably way more fun. But what I've noticed is that I feel as if most come in methodical. Yeah. Right. But those who come in most methodical, at least what you do is you set your expectation. You could get what it is that you need out of it. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:16:41 Instead of feeling like you were manipulated, right? And we had, you know, Spencer Pratt. Yes. Yeah. So probably the most notorious villain. super villain on a reality show. And we interviewed him. He was on the pod.
Starting point is 00:16:57 And he was very specific about how his objective was to be a villain. His objective was to manipulate the situation for his own good. He wrote his own storylines. He manipulated everything. So when you look at that, that was your goal. Your goal was, I'm familiar with this thing. Yeah. I'm going to use the system for my behalf.
Starting point is 00:17:18 Yeah, because that was, you know, you don't know, like when you do it, movie or scripted show you know the screen time you're going to get i'm in the scene i'm not in this scene my shit i was like okay i don't care like i don't care from like regardless of the edit i've got no choice on that or obviously if i say nice things nice things will be put in if i say bad things bad things will be put in but i was just like i legitimately all i want to do is guarantee i'm in the show because there was some people there that like fully like and all the shows of them that just disappear and it comes to the last week and they're like oh my god I have to do something have to cause drama or whatever else but I also think that if you're going to do a reality show
Starting point is 00:17:58 if you're thinking like that you can also ruin your chances because you see it as well people come in and they go in their interview and they're like okay I'm thinking about what I'm going to say the difference with me is I don't care what I'm saying I'm just going to say how I feel and say whatever else like oh that guy's got like I remember it was a girl I said you got like chalky teeth and that guy's got like big fingernails like I would literally whatever I whatever I could to like just at least like I want you to get that sound by whatever else I see a lot of other people that come in with the mentality I think when I did perfect match one of the girls was like this is my rebrand I'm like go you're on a hookup show
Starting point is 00:18:35 this is your rebrand it's really not a good idea but she would sit there and you can see her like being calculated and it just looks like you're lying and being deceitful yes and that's wrong yeah but on that note though there's a fine line between trying to, I guess, control the situation and being your authentic self. So I feel like the audience resonates most with people who are authentically themselves. So for too hard to handle, was that you? Like that was... I think it was me, but on steroids.
Starting point is 00:19:06 You know? Like, it was me, like, whenever I would do something naughty, I'd put on the shirt that said, trouble. So, like, I would try and, like, have these cues of, like, when I knew... So people could pick up that I fuck someone. Like, I was doing something up. doing something wrong. Yeah, it was never like, oh, I'm just going to go like here to get this or whatever else.
Starting point is 00:19:26 It was, let me just be exaggerated and more playful and careless. Because I think when you care too much, especially on a reality show is when you kind of get shot on the foot. It happens to a lot of them. Yeah, you don't see, you don't think the world exists. It's all you think is happening is in that. Yeah. I think, too, is that a lot of people don't realize how. hard it is too for the contributors.
Starting point is 00:19:50 Oh my God. Because to that point is like they take your cell phones, they take everything. Yeah. You're in a bubble. You have the producers in your ear. You begin to question. Dude. Like, am I thinking this?
Starting point is 00:20:04 Is it actually happening? Dude, it's crazy. It's mental warfare. It's, and some people really, it's like you need to never be on a show because it's not easy because you actually can't trust anyone. Like, you don't have your friends, you don't have your family, and you sure as fuck can't trust the producers. Because, like, they're going to say things whether good or bad. It's to benefit the storyline, and it's to get what they need out of you.
Starting point is 00:20:30 Like, it's very fascinating. Now that I've done a ton of them, that I'm like, oh, okay. Like, thank God I, like, was carefree early on and, like, didn't really, like, think about anything too much. Because you see other people that, like, will hear something from a producer. Like, oh, I don't know if he actually likes you. I think he said something about to someone else, and then you see him a spiral. Because the thing is on these shows
Starting point is 00:20:50 is you don't have anything to do but think. So you're sitting there thinking about everything. It's the worst. It's crazy. It's the worst. You know what's wild about that is everyone talks about how we're so distracted in the world. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:21:01 But when you have nothing to do with it, it's the most dangerous thing. The most dangerous, yeah. Because I remember being on a show and we'd sit down and would all be like chilling and then someone would be like, the curtain's different today. Or like,
Starting point is 00:21:14 I see that they put an extra plant there. I'm like, yo, what the fuck? They're like something's happening today. Like, there's an intruder coming. I'm like, what? Like, yeah, there's a bombshell because there's a new pop plant. And they were like, yeah, no, the chef didn't put out
Starting point is 00:21:29 orange juice or something for breakfast. Someone here. Someone's gay. Yeah, it does. Careful. My God, there's no OJ on the table. Yeah, yeah. They're like, see, didn't put three ice cubes in it.
Starting point is 00:21:42 You're going to die. Yeah, it's fascinating. And then you just spiral from there. That's all you do it. And then you get someone on board. And once you have someone on board with your thought process, the whole place is falling down. It's like, guys, look at that quick.
Starting point is 00:21:53 We have to go over here. We have to go see that. See this extra camera there. See that camera is pointing towards the toilet. Someone must have been in there hooking up. Like it was so crazy. Yeah. But it's fun.
Starting point is 00:22:03 It is fun. Like, I think it's fun. It seems like, well, actually, let me not put words in your mouth. Okay. What do you think allowed you then to thrive in that environment? I think the thing that allowed me to thrive is I just, life is fun and like I just have that mentality of like, okay, like this isn't like that, it's like a crazy holiday, you know?
Starting point is 00:22:30 Like I get to go and have fun and get drunk and hook out with people and whatever else. Like sure it's all on camera, but then, um, I don't know. I just never really overanalyzed anything. Like I just be like, okay, cool. Like we're here to make a really good. good show, but also, like, I'm a fun guy. Like, I'm not going to sit there and stress if someone's shoelaces a different color or if there's a new pop part or, like, this is going on.
Starting point is 00:22:55 Like, I'll just be like, all right, like, I'm just going to be fun here and enjoy it. And that was the best thing is because my goal is, like, make my friends laugh. Yeah, it seems like you stayed with that goal. That's the whole only thing, yeah. It's like, I'm just going to make my people happy. What do you think would most shock people, especially about too hot to handle from behind the scenes. I think how many people were actually having sex.
Starting point is 00:23:19 So do you know the show at all or anything? Yeah, but for anyone who doesn't. Okay, yeah. So the premise of the show is they have a bunch of horny people. And if you kiss... Super. Every show, I guess. You know what?
Starting point is 00:23:30 Every... Yeah. You kiss spoon, make out, have sex, do anything. You lose money off the prize fund. And there's $100,000 up for grabs. And yeah, anytime someone does that stuff, it loses money off the prize fund. So now all the new seasons have taught the handouts,
Starting point is 00:23:43 people try and kiss and have sex right away to get this great time. Yeah. I think whenever you have a second, third, fourth series of the show, it's almost never as good as the first because everyone is trying to go back and replicate what they saw. Here's my idea. This is what I told them. It obviously didn't go anyway.
Starting point is 00:24:02 I said, if someone has sex, you should delete their Instagram. Oh, damn. That means something. Dude, I shackled, chain, everything, literally, every lock around me, duct tape, everything. I'm like, literally I'll be up in a tree. You're right? I'm not even talking to anyone.
Starting point is 00:24:21 And that's what I said. I said, look, if you, that would be a good kerbill, but it'd have to be like a live show, like Love Island or some shit. It's like, oh, look how many followers you got now. Well, if you mess this challenge up, it's going to get deleted or like banned for a week. When you went to Too Hot to Handle, according to my little research, you had about 140,000 followers. Did you have the most when you went in?
Starting point is 00:24:43 Yeah. And psychologically though, though, take me to the mind of Harry, okay? So psychologically, what does that do, having the most followers going on. I just wanted the social proof. I wanted, because on the show, I wanted, like, people going to, I wanted my name also to be easily searchable. You know, if you have more followers, you're going to be easy, you type in Harry. Obviously, Harry Styles and whatever else, I wasn't really on the list. I'm like, I want to be easily searchable.
Starting point is 00:25:10 That was the goal. Like I wanted the social proof and I wanted to be easy to find. Gotcha. Wow, smart, man. You know what? The other thing, too, is do you consider yourself a smart guy? Sometimes it's not in my daily life. No, seriously.
Starting point is 00:25:26 Yeah, I think so. Yeah, I think so. Yeah. Yeah. Because I think also a lot of, there's this notion. I think whenever you see someone do extremely well from reality TV, 99.9% of the times they're brilliant. And you may look at them and say, oh, well, look at what they're doing.
Starting point is 00:25:46 No, it's what they're doing behind. It's everything that you just mentioned. Yeah. It's putting yourself in a position so that you'll be searchable so that this will boost. And then the result, too, was you walked away with, was it like 2.4 million followers? Four and a half. Oh. You're like, hey.
Starting point is 00:26:05 Shut up. You're like, sit down, little man. Hey. Never get there wrong again, brother. I'm fucking, I'm done. I'm leaving. Yeah, five on TikTok, but all good. I've been counting.
Starting point is 00:26:21 Yeah, I think there's what, like, maybe 500,000 on Snapchat too, but whatever. Whatever. A couple hundred thousand on Facebook. No one's counting any of that. Nothing. I think that 11 million or 12 million total. But that was just, someone told me that.
Starting point is 00:26:33 Anyway, what was the question? I know that was. All right, so you definitely, shh. It's day one. We still got work to do. But really, like, you, you blew from that, like, legit. We got blown.
Starting point is 00:26:49 Literally and figuratively, you were, you were. People blown me. They did. They did, many people. Yeah, well, I mean, that's what, yeah. Fair few. So, so let me ask you this. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:27:05 Did you get the highest number of follows out of everyone? else on that no no no so my ex uh she she was already like talented with like social media stuff okay so i think she had a couple hundred thousand already like most forward post on the show so i think she she definitely um was better like it was my it was day one for me trying to figure out how to do social media and how to post and whatever else um definitely on tictock i think for sure but uh instagram not not as much um but yeah yeah but also like I hope girls are going to do way better than some blanky guy.
Starting point is 00:27:43 Why is it that the girls do better on social than the guys? I think because I think girls are more active on social. Like the following, the female following is way more active on social. It's also easier to relate to them. Like to be like, oh, yeah, I want to wear her bikini.
Starting point is 00:27:57 Like you look at my shit. People don't, oh, I'm not going to wear hair wax or protein shake, whatever else. So I think that, yeah, there's that. And maybe also because there's more drama with the girls on reality TV they definitely more heavily involved in drama
Starting point is 00:28:14 whereas guys kind of maybe sit back a little bit early on I was a little bit crazy but now I'm definitely like anyone talks about me I don't care but I think that that's what it is like it's hard for a female follower to look at my page and maybe relate at all unless I'm like hey men suck
Starting point is 00:28:31 and love my sisters yeah I hear you yeah now now leaving that though having that boost then I would imagine financially that helps from a business perspective that helps and for the first time you know in your young adult life you're now earning money it's crazy yeah I had a print on demand um merch site because I knew that the audience was coming and I was like any any link or any like your real estate anything that you have on your social media people are going to click it any button people will click it They'll check it. They'll click. But I was like, I need to make money off the jump because this is going to come and go so quick.
Starting point is 00:29:15 As they do, reality TV shows like you're cool for a month and then you're done. And there's a new show out. Like, you look at all the people from Love Island last season compared to the Love Island this season. Like, people aren't really talking about them as much. Yes. They warranted there still, like, you know, celebrities in their own right. But this new season and then watch the next season come out. Like, they're going to forget about all these people unless they do something new.
Starting point is 00:29:36 So I knew that that's what was going to happen. So I had this shitty website. It's terrible. I figured out how to make a website and print on the month. And I kept maxing my credit card out every day. The borrow friends credit cards because people would jump on the website and buy like terrible sweater or whatever else. But I was making money. And I think I made, it was like $60,000 in that month of the first couple weeks.
Starting point is 00:30:01 But I remember I'd check my shopper fly every day. And there'd be 2.5,000 people on it. Like every, at any moment, any moment. I was like, wow. That's incredible. This is crazy. This is wild. Wish I could do it again.
Starting point is 00:30:11 But is that what then inspires you to do more reality TV? It's the love of, firstly, I'm super competitive. Like I love this shit. And I love growing. I love when I see any show, any Netflix show I've been on top 10.
Starting point is 00:30:29 I love that. I come like, okay, how do we make that last longer? Like, how do we be more valuable to them? And any other network I've been on. But I think it's more just, I'm kind of too far in the hole now so I have to keep going like I can't do anything else
Starting point is 00:30:44 I better just keep doing these shows no I love it like I genuinely I love it so much like I love meeting people I love when I'm out and someone's like oh you were that guy from that show and I've just made a new friend like I love that I love being out and someone going
Starting point is 00:30:59 you know seeing someone excited or giddy about timing up that on a show and like oh this is crazy or like when I see people from Like the Dancing with the Stars audience, like that's an older audience. Yes. Big audience, though. Big audience.
Starting point is 00:31:13 Yeah, when we're on tour and there's like, you know, people in their 60s coming up and they're excited to me. I'm like, this is cool, there goes. We get to feel a little bit, a little bit of excitement. It's just still the same thing, though. Like, now I have a lot more friends, so I have to make a lot more people laugh. Yeah, so. A lot more. A lot more.
Starting point is 00:31:30 Yeah, so 12 million. I think. It just went up, by the way. Yeah, 15 million. It went up by a million. You know this. Yeah. Yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 00:31:40 All right, if you've made it this far, I know you're loving the conversation, so please do me one small favor. Hit that bell icon, join our community. You just mentioned Dance with the Stars. Yeah. So do you know the TV resume? Because you already have a decent TV resume. Yeah, okay. And from where to where?
Starting point is 00:32:00 So you went from too hot to handle. Hot-Rig Island. True. Hopperg Island, tote the handle. What the hell was next? Maybe floor is lava, inventions that change the world. Match me if you can. Amazing race.
Starting point is 00:32:17 Perfect match. Dancing with the stars. Three movies in between there. I think it's probably something else I'm missing. And then let's marry Harry. How old are you? 28. 28.
Starting point is 00:32:33 Yeah. All right. Yeah. Are you proud of your career so far? No. Duh. Seriously? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:32:47 Why? It, dude, it's so easy to be an idiot on a TV show. It's so easy. I'm proud of the friends I've made. I'm proud of the connections. Like, I'm proud that the people at Netflix, my best friends on the planet, I'm so proud of filming Let's Marry Harry. Like, I was proud that crew, the coolest people of it.
Starting point is 00:33:09 Like, I'm proud of that. I'm the most proud of creating jobs. Like, that's cool. Yeah. The most proud of that. But personally, in my career, like, no, I think there's just so much work to do. Like, there's just so much stuff to do. And I'm so violently ambitious with what I see happening in the future and where I see it going.
Starting point is 00:33:31 That, yeah, like, I'm not, I'm not there, like, not there yet. Okay. Like, yeah, maybe the little kid in, in. the country in Australia when I was growing up would be like, damn, that's pretty cool. But I think me and him both know that this is just the first year that I'm kind of getting started. Yeah, this is. This is. You know, what's so interesting, what's already shocked me on the real is how, I would say, mature you present.
Starting point is 00:34:02 Oh, yeah. Yeah. Versus the hairy, you know, that we see. Yeah. You know, and so when you think about some of those projects, in particular, perfect match. Was that, you feel like, was that the best version of you? The worst.
Starting point is 00:34:15 That was the worst version of you. That was a really bad version of myself. And I think it was super reflected. Like, you can see that that wasn't who I was. I just broke 13 months of being sober. I was going through the worst breakup of, like the last public breakup I ever went through. But I was really struggling mentally. Like, really, like, and I'm like, oh, this is a good idea.
Starting point is 00:34:37 Like, this is what will fix me going on a show. Like, this will be fun. Like, get away, escape from my world. And news flash, don't go on a dating show if you go through a breakup. Not going to make you feel better. Yeah. And then also that show isn't a normal show. It's everyone who's been on a show before that's been rejected or whatever else.
Starting point is 00:34:58 Hey, here's your chance to get more screen time and be on TV again. So people would just be fighting to fight. Like, people would just be arguing for arguing. And then I went in with a bit of a target on my head already. having a very public bad breakup, you know, being on a ton of these shows. And a lot of the people on that show, their shows hadn't come out yet. So they were just, they were super green to all this shit. And then people were just fighting and whatever else.
Starting point is 00:35:26 And like, I'm sitting there like, and I think I wasn't the best version on myself because I had that thought of like, how do I also try and like save myself here? Like, how do I fix it? Like, how do I be the good guy? It's like, brother, you're on a hookup show trying to have sex with people on closet. Like, you can't do anything. So yeah, on that show, I really set myself up for failure. But warranted, super grateful for it because the best thing about doing these shows is that a year later you get to reflect on the person you were.
Starting point is 00:36:01 And that's really cool. Like, there's no other job on the planet where, or maybe there is, but there's another job on the planet where you get to sit down. and see the version of yourself a year ago in that crazy environment, in an amplified environment, and go, wow, what did I not like about that guy? Yeah. What do I love about that guy now? And what are we doing to make sure that we are never him again? And that was the coolest thing is to be like, okay, cool.
Starting point is 00:36:27 Watching that, not proud of it. And then I think ever since that moment, anytime I talk about any exes or anything publicly, it was always in the best light ever. Is that what your biggest takeaway was? was how to reflect on your exes or on myself i think just yeah reflecting and just being making sure that like yeah that i was like again proud of how i was acting and also like i wasn't being funny that was a thing like there was a few things that i was being funny but i'm like oh the goal is to be funny for your friends you're just being a dickhead yeah you suck like just be funny like go back
Starting point is 00:37:05 to having fun and running around and like trying to do an egg race and um i would like hide other people's clothes and other people's rooms so that they were trying to fight. Like, just go back to doing funny shit instead of just being a big six five drunk idiot. So, six five. Yeah, 12 million followers. Yeah, there you go.
Starting point is 00:37:22 You just drop the number now. Is it down again? Yeah. 25 million. Miss the beast, let's collab. Yeah. What moment, and I can probably guess what this is, but what moment do you regret or you would change
Starting point is 00:37:36 from Perfect Match? Oh, man, you know, editing. Yeah. The edit, yeah. No, no, there was a lot of things that, you know, looking back on that show and I was like, oh, I regret, I didn't, like, I just regret going. Like, I didn't need to do it.
Starting point is 00:37:52 Oh, wow. Okay. I didn't need to do it. But, again, it helped shape me, whatever. I was like, there was, like, the editing on it was really funny because shit that was going on, like, that didn't happen. Like, there was a moment where I was, like, throwing up. And I was, like, a handful of other people, we all had food poisoning.
Starting point is 00:38:07 But they'd, like, splice shit. Again, TV show. If I didn't drop, it wouldn't put it in. But there's splice stuff around. Again, TV show. It's what's made to happen. And if it didn't happen, then people wouldn't watch a show or people wouldn't talk about it.
Starting point is 00:38:19 So, like, I get it, fully get it. But, yeah, I just think, like, they could have, you know, I wish I didn't eat the salmon that day because the throwing up was really embarrassing. And that was, yeah, so is it. Yeah. Go back and not eat the salmon. Don't eat the salmon.
Starting point is 00:38:33 Yeah. Yeah, especially like, hey, if I'm cooking it, don't eat it. Then don't eat. What about with any of the ladies? Would you have done anything? differently. You know what? Nah.
Starting point is 00:38:44 You know, I think again, like those moments obviously it sucks. It's not good. But selfishly looking back, going, okay, cool, never want to be that guy again,
Starting point is 00:38:57 never want to do that. Never want to make people feel that way. You know, if I kiss someone, I should probably say, yeah, I kissed them. That's how it is. Not trying to stand tentos and be like, they didn't go to it on camera.
Starting point is 00:39:10 But, I think that would be the only thing. It's like, look, I don't think anyone was going on that show with the intention. Like, I'm going to marry these people right now. Like, this is my person. That's not the intention. Perfect match is a show where people hook up and have fun. And that's what it is.
Starting point is 00:39:25 Same one taught the handle. It's a hookup show. It's not a marriage show or like a serious show where stuff like that needs to happen. So I think that, yeah, and I think anyone on the show looks back at it now. It's definitely, like, it's, you know, it's, it's, you know, it's, It's just a hookup show. People dare to have sex and get drunk and have fun. Which is much different than let's marry Harry.
Starting point is 00:39:47 The biggest difference ever. What can you tell us about it? Because when I look at it, it's like, actually, I'll tell you, I asked my wife, I was like, what do you think about this? She was like, oh, this is The New Bachelor. Yeah. Right? That's what it seems like this is.
Starting point is 00:40:04 Yeah. I think that calling it, you know, the new Bachelor is doing a disservice because it is, you is massively way better, different. And it's needed. You know, you watch The Bachelor, here's the road. Same old shit, you know? And I honestly think that this show will change marriage sale shows forever.
Starting point is 00:40:28 Really? Like, I think it's going to be the biggest, best thing. And what the world kind of needs in these shows. Like, obviously, world needs a lot of things. Probably done another dating show with me on it. But it was one of the most challenging, most rewarding, most in-depth processes I've ever done. And I can't imagine. Honestly, I think The Bachelor will probably cease to exist after the show.
Starting point is 00:41:01 And if they do, they're going to continue to lose viewers. Tell me how you really feel there. I did. Let's get some headlines in here. No, look, Taylor, Frankie Paul, her season's going to do great. But, you know, unless the Bachelor cast like Michael B. Jordan, like, this show is going to clap its cheeks. And that's fine. And I'll stand 10 toes on that.
Starting point is 00:41:24 I believe this, man. I believe this. So I would imagine the basic premise from what you could, if you can confirm this is, you have a group of women who are. So far, so good. Well, no, no. And I'm going to go there, too. Because I didn't know if they were sprinkling some men. No, no, no, no.
Starting point is 00:41:41 Okay, so group of women are competing to marry you. Correct. Okay. Very unfortunate. So sorry. So just going into this, though, is your thought you are open. Because the shows that you've done thus far, as you said, are hookup shows. This is a totally different caliber of a show.
Starting point is 00:42:03 So was your thought, I am open to now. being married. No, I am. Like, that was the thing. It's like, I am doing this, no matter what. Okay. Because my, so Alex Cooper, yes.
Starting point is 00:42:17 She's gone through the car. She was figuring out who's the best person for me. Like, my team, my friends at Netflix, like, I'm with them pretty much every other day. We're spending Christmas together. Like, they're my family and my friends. Like, I really care deeply about their team that was building their show.
Starting point is 00:42:36 Everyone is doing it. for love essentially like everyone like it's just we have such a good relationship it was such a tight ship so that i knew god i can't waste these people's time like and i know that they're doing everything they can to make sure that there's the perfect people for me once we start this this process um i just think being with my sisters and seeing them with you know their men and their kids and i was like this is this is what i want this is important like this is and it's the only thing in my life that i hadn't really put, you know, I hadn't really watered that seed at all. I'd just be like, oh, let's just have fun or whatever else. So now I get the most incredible opportunity to, to meet, you know,
Starting point is 00:43:19 there were so many people that signed up that had crashed the website. Like, it was literally, I posted a story and I remember it crashing and I'm like, no way, like, that's wild. So there was- These are people applying. Yeah, yeah, yeah, it was, dude, it was, it was, so wild. And I was sitting there and, you know, we have so many, incredible people that have signed up that want to take time out of their lives to see if I'm their guy and get to know me. And then, you know, all this whole, like, it was just like such a really beautiful experience. And I think the viewers, probably myself as well, is going to be super shocked and really kind of taken back with how deep it is. Man, I can't wait to see it.
Starting point is 00:44:02 You mentioned Alex Cooper in there. Yeah. So she's executive producing. And, oh, hosting as well or just... No, no, she's just EP. Like, she's obviously, it's an unwell production, so she's super involved. But honestly, I remember
Starting point is 00:44:20 like she was texting every day, like, wants to know everything that's going on. Like, she pairs a lot. She's on it. Can we talk about your friendship with her? Yeah. Because it seems like that like that relationship has changed your life. So Alex and I's relationship kind of started
Starting point is 00:44:37 on Caller Daddy. Like after the tour, I went and did a show. And then I've been a repeat client, like a fair bit on the show. But we'd never really been friends outside of that. And then it was the same year, did perfect match, I think. She had me on again. And at the end of it, she's like, hey, I want to see if you'd be down to, like, start a podcast at my network. And I said, literally give me a contract.
Starting point is 00:44:59 I'll sign it right now. I don't care. I'll sign it. I don't just them? Yeah. All good. Whatever. 100% to you?
Starting point is 00:45:05 Let's go. No. No, no, it wasn't like that. But she's like, yeah, we're building something special and we'd love to have you there. And I'm like, dude, yeah, of course. Like, I love you guys. Like, I love being in your orbit. But it's also just being, you know, so motivated by their success.
Starting point is 00:45:22 Like, there's, dude, she's such a powerhouse. Like, you just. I can't. Already icon status, yeah. Incredible. But also, like, just seeing her with fans is, like, another thing. Like, it's so special. because we'll be at an event or something that they're putting on.
Starting point is 00:45:40 And she's just, like, sitting there, like, hugging everyone and, like, holding some of the shoulders, like, talking about it. So engaged. I was like, do you know that person? She's like, oh, to listen to the podcast, like, she's, if you ever meet her, like, especially if girls meet it, it's just, like, she is, you're the only person on the planet that matters and exists right there. Like, she really cares about her audience. But most, like, she also just, like, dude, she's the best. I could call her about anything. but also her husband Matt, the coolest guy ever.
Starting point is 00:46:08 And I think going into this show, I actually loved Mary Harry. I told them, I was like, to have something that you two have would be so special. Because they're the perfect people for each other. Like, they're so special together. And like, she'll think of an idea, he'll execute. Like, it's so cool. And he doesn't, like, if she's like, all right, I want to dream this big. He's like, let's dream bigger.
Starting point is 00:46:30 Like, they really complement each other the best. And I just like whenever I'm at their house or I have a dinner or whatever else like It's just it feels like you know with my biggest siblings like and they just and they They kind of they definitely take them under their wing they're like I really want to really want to help you get ahead Yes so you feel like they are your mentors yeah yeah for sure yeah yeah they're great dude they're awesome Yeah I can see how um they entered your life at the right time yeah perfect timing yeah divine time yeah I could see it. In that zone, you really needed a duo like that. Yeah. Dude, it's awesome. Yeah, good stuff. Yeah, it's really cool. We need to talk about how much noise there is in the new year. Reset, reinvent,
Starting point is 00:47:21 rebuild. And what I've found usually goes hand in hand with that is pressure. But this year, how about flipping that pressure into permission to finally try the thing you've been thinking about for months? And not to do it perfectly, but just to start. When I launched my match, making business, I was overwhelmed and nervous, but I quickly learned that you don't need all the answers, just the starting point. And that's why I recommend our sponsor Shopify to anyone wanting to build a business where you sell products or services online. Shopify makes the journey easy to start and to keep growing. You get templates to build your store, built in tools for marketing, and even AI that helps with writing copy and editing photos. You don't need to be a designer
Starting point is 00:48:03 or a coder either. Millions of entrepreneurs have already made that first move. So in 2026, stop waiting and start selling with Shopify. Sign up for your one pound per month trial and start selling today at Shopify.com.com.uk slash need to talk. That's Shopify.com.com.com. Slash need to talk. We all have that dream trip. We've been wishing we could go on. But too often, life or usually price gets in the way. That's why Priceline is here to help you turn your dream trip into reality. With up to 60% off hotels and up to 50% off flights, you can book everything you need for your next adventure.
Starting point is 00:48:44 Don't just dream about that next trip. Book it with Priceline. Download the Priceline app or visit Priceline.com and book your next trip today. Go to your happy price. Priceline. Are your ad campaigns lighting up the dashboard, but not the pipeline? That's bullspend, and marketers are calling it out in. Dashboard confessions My boss asked for results
Starting point is 00:49:06 So I open my dashboard For the only positive sounding metric I had Impressions Cut the bull spend See revenue, not just reach LinkedIn delivers the highest return on ad spend Of major ad networks Advertise on LinkedIn
Starting point is 00:49:19 Spend $250 on your first campaign And get a $250 credit Go to LinkedIn.com slash campaign Turnssing Conditions Apply This is a Bose moment Your 10 boring blocks from home Until the beat drops in Bose clarity and the baseline transforms boring into maybe the best part of your day.
Starting point is 00:49:37 Your life deserves music. Your music deserves Bose. Find your perfect product at Bose.com. We have to talk. We have to talk about OnlyFans. Okay. Here's where I want to go with this. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:49:51 Is you became one of the highest grossing earners, male creators on OnlyFans. But then I saw, you say at one point later, you said, I may delete this when I get married. Yeah. So help me understand. Oh, you're trying to pick up shit, huh? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:50:11 I mean, yeah. It's deleted. No. But this is, because I'm looking at like this evolution of Harry. Yeah, what I mean? And so when did you join, but then help me understand that statement of, I may delete this when I get married. Dude, it's going.
Starting point is 00:50:26 Yeah. It is going. It's going. Yeah, very soon. I think, so when we did talk to handle, it's kind of no, brainer, to be honest. Like, it was, you're on a show where you're kind of described as like a sex addict. Essentially, you're branded that way, right? To what they handle was like, oh, don't have sex, whatever else. And people are like, oh my God, these people are idiots. Like, they can't not touch
Starting point is 00:50:48 each other for a month, you know? So we had this free marketing where it's like, well, no brand is going to pay that much. And also, like, you can really build a community of, like, horny people here. So, like, let's run it up. So that was like, that was going off for a while. And then it kind of turned more into that community building. Like there's a lot of like there's OFTV shows that have done on another show I've done on there. I don't know if that Kansas TV show. Yeah, but it is though. Yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 00:51:15 It's amazing network. Yeah, there's other stuff that I've done on there where it's yeah, just again, just like a different platform to express and also not be. You can kind of just do whatever you want, which is kind of cool. But build community and also have a one-on-one interaction with people. but in saying that it has made it difficult to date sometimes like some people feel a little bit of type of way about it and um but i also it's just like as my career is progressing it's increasingly more difficult to to put time into that and to give people what they need so it's like well do i just pull the plug or do i half ask it and try and keep going and growing on that so
Starting point is 00:52:02 once marry hurry is I'm pretty sure it's gonna finito it's gonna be done which will suck but it's just like life things have been getting so crazy lately like we've
Starting point is 00:52:15 there's a movie in the works that I'm writing thank you so much with one of my really good friends which were announced soon but there's two other TV shows that are going ahead there's this AI company
Starting point is 00:52:28 that have just started randomly like there's just a and a skincare brain that I have. Because there's just, there's so much stuff happening and also creating content as well. And I love that the moment out of anything. So I'm just sitting here like,
Starting point is 00:52:42 okay, well, we've got to be a little bit more thoughtful where I put my energy and also like, I don't want to upset people, you know? Right. Especially if you don't text on it back for like three days and they're going to be a bit sassy. Gotcha, gotcha. But now on OnlyFans, how much have you made on OnlyFans?
Starting point is 00:53:01 I think, I'll give a low number I'll give a range between 50 billion and zero dollars anywhere between that yeah
Starting point is 00:53:14 yeah so just throw a dart at a wall and nah honestly not that much okay yeah all right really only yeah only like 300 billion yeah yeah yeah
Starting point is 00:53:26 the right what I saw what I saw reported okay tell me hot cold or just not is 3 million. But I think that was way low. I think that's probably one year. It's probably first year. Pretty good, huh?
Starting point is 00:53:41 Yeah. Pretty good. Pretty good. Yeah. You're pretty good. Okay. So that's probably way low. But all right, here's why I bring this up.
Starting point is 00:53:50 Okay. I bring it up because it's a massive revenue source. Yeah. But it seems like, and this is going to this whole through line of maturity, It seems like what you're saying is it doesn't matter how much money it's making The fact is is it's not good for me It's not where I want to place my time Yeah yeah for sure because that's the thing is like you put your time into anything
Starting point is 00:54:14 It's gonna be fruitful right like sure the 15 million or whatever that's been made on there There we go no maybe it's less or more I don't know I forget but but I would imagine if three was the first year Yeah, yeah, at least 15 Yeah. Now, I know that you have said repeatedly that you're a relationships guy. When did I say that? Your whole career. He's alive. The whole career. You know, I. Can we talk a little bit about relationship?
Starting point is 00:54:43 Okay. Because you mentioned an ex in there that you're good friends with. Yeah. But here's how I love to do it. And so it's not salacious is, if I name someone, you tell me what the lesson was. Okay. From that relationship. Okay. Right.
Starting point is 00:54:56 So you mentioned Georgia. Friday. What was, what did you learn from that relationship? You know, I, Georgia and I really, like, love each other. Like, really love each other. Like, she, we had, we were together for a while, but the biggest thing that I learned was I wasn't good at telling her how I felt. And we weren't, we were terrible. We were, and she would admit this, we were so bad at communicating with each other.
Starting point is 00:55:27 We assumed. All the time. All the time. I assume she did this. She assumed I did that. That was the biggest thing. And like hearing stuff out from someone and say something and assuming that that's true. So I think that was the biggest thing that like looking back and I'm sure she'll say the same.
Starting point is 00:55:45 Is that we were terrible at talking. Lucy Hill? Can't speak on that one. Okay. Pass. Yeah. Okay, so then if you just collectively look back on all of the relationships you have, you know, romantic relationships in your life.
Starting point is 00:56:06 Yeah. What do you believe the best lesson is for the young men who watch you? Because what I've noticed about your life so far is it was based on making the guys back in Australia laugh. But all those guys who watch you are watching. A lot of them are probably starting to emulate and watch what you do, right? Especially with regard to your relationships. So what do you think is the greatest lesson you could give them about relationships? If I could tell myself, a younger version of myself, yeah, I would just say,
Starting point is 00:56:47 yo, be disciplined on yourself and stand tall and be patient. Like there's so many like relationships where it's like oh well she doesn't let me hit then it is what it is whatever like it's actually not the be or end all but I think like when I was in my 20s like well I'm still in but like early 20s it was like that was my currency with my friends as like oh did you smash that girl? So I think like having patience would be so cool and being disciplined with yourself like you know like the And was it delayed gratification? Yes, Yeah, I think that would be super important too. But I think that, yeah, the biggest thing is, oh, and listen a lot more. Yeah, because I just, I think people get so excited talking about themselves.
Starting point is 00:57:41 And what I realized is when I just, just overwhelm them with questions and what I learn and be excited about their life is really like super. important. I think maybe I'm not answering that right. But I think also like with the discipline stuff is not like, hey, eye on your shirt or like make sure that this is always good. I think it's just like these discipline with your morals or like discipline with how you present or how you take care of those people. Yes. I don't know. I would probably imagine a lot of self-discipline as well. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And I think also and maybe that leans on my life too is when I was on discipline, I was out and drinking every night and it was big in that hookup culture and whatever else.
Starting point is 00:58:31 When I was disciplined, it's like waking up at 5am, making sure that, you know, day trade in the morning for the first hour, like just being locked in on that lifestyle and health and fitness and showing up for myself. So I think just making sure that there is someone coming in my life that is discipline as well or who has at least has a goal or someone who's at least excited about something in the future. Yes. So focus on the people that wake up with a purpose instead of people that wake up and just want to fuck around. Which is also fine, but it's not for me. Yes. So it's not for you because, so your therapy and self-reflection seem to be, this is a major like inflection point in your life. What was the incident that drove you to that?
Starting point is 00:59:18 Was that your father's passing? Is that what drove you to therapy? No. Stop Georgia. Prer. Really? Yeah. Truly.
Starting point is 00:59:26 Yeah. Yeah. Me and Georgia, we, um, you know, you know something's wrong, but you don't know how to deal with it. We weren't talking. So, like, something's not right here. Like, we're, we're budding heads. Like, we'll break up, we get back together.
Starting point is 00:59:37 Breakup gets it back together. Like, it was very, like, up and down all the time. Um, I was watching porn and that was making me not be as faithful as I should have been. Um, it was something that I had to work on because I was like, I'm not saying that that porn is the catalyst, but it would just make me think about other people. And I think that, There was so much stuff that was going on.
Starting point is 00:59:56 And we weren't, again, weren't talking about it. So when we're in that relationship, went to therapy. And it really helped everything. Like, it really helped me go, oh, wow. Be patient. Don't be, like, because she said something that doesn't make you feel good, don't react. Like, hear the whole thing. Hear it out.
Starting point is 01:00:13 Like, she doesn't mean to hurt you. She's just hurt, you know. So it really helped with all that. It's just like to, yeah. And then I just stayed in it ever since. Because my therapist is the best. Yeah, she's really cool. So you continue to go to this?
Starting point is 01:00:27 Yeah, every week. Yeah, look at that. Every week you go. Yeah. Yeah. And would you encourage, would you encourage everyone to participate in therapy? You know, I think therapy is the greatest gift because I don't feel like I'm a burden to my friends. You know, and that's not even the main point, but like, for me, it's, I get to talk to someone about whatever I want.
Starting point is 01:00:50 No judgment, no, who cares, literally anything. going on and get a professional, get professional, like, guidance around it, or just a soundboard. I think it makes me a better friend and a better, you know, partner for people, too, because I already got, like, the thing that's, like, weighing on your mind
Starting point is 01:01:08 all week or all month or whatever else, instead of, like, blowing up and snapping at your partner, like, you've already discussed it with someone, and you already know ways around it, or you already realize it's probably not that big of a deal. Who cares? Right. And that's, like, half of it is people go, like,
Starting point is 01:01:23 oh, well, you can fucking clean the dishes. And then it builds up and builds up and builds up. And then it breaks, yes, yes. Just a heads up, this next section includes discussion of suicide. Please watch with care. To that point, you mentioned that you, but it heads with your brother. Yeah, yeah. What was that all about?
Starting point is 01:01:43 And how old was your brother? I'm sorry, younger, older brother. Yeah, he's older. I think he's like two and a half years older than I mean. You know, we've always had a fascinating, really. relationship with very competitive, I guess. Well, not really, actually. Like, I'm not competitive with him. Like, I couldn't really care. Like, I'm just, I'm excited for what he does and what he tells what he's got going on. We, we clash heads a lot recently, and I've decided that, like, I actually
Starting point is 01:02:10 don't want him in my life at all when I've fully blocked him. Um, there was a moment recently, the reason why I blocked him on, he was like, again, we hadn't spoken in a while. And he has, like, a weird parosocial relationship with me where he was like, analyzes everything online and then report it back to my mom. And then this one morning I woke up and I had all these messages of like, oh, why, like why? And I called my mom. It was like, hey, we have a one-to-one relationship. If you find something weird or whatever else, call me. Let's talk. I don't talk to this guy. We're not on each other's lives at all. So whatever he's doing, it's as a, he's over-analizing something that he has no idea on what's going on. We also don't have a
Starting point is 01:02:51 relationship. So growing up, we had, and I guess I've never really spoken about it, but yeah, we, we had a pretty good relationship, I would always fight. There's a lot of big fights. And then the problem was, I think, girls. I was always bagging the baddies, okay? You know, I can't believe that. Dude, I do it.
Starting point is 01:03:10 Every girl I, every girl I've ever dated, the most beautiful woman I've ever met, right? Right. His girlfriends, I don't know. No, no, no, no, because, no, but we just, I think it was that, you know, as the girls. You're going up. So this is going to sound like a wild question. Okay. But I think I know the answer to this one, right?
Starting point is 01:03:27 When you were growing up, are you taller than your brother? The tallest. Yeah. Tolest in the family. Yeah. So I've noticed this pattern with brothers who are older and their younger brother becomes taller. Oh, really? It's like 100% where there is something that messes with the ego.
Starting point is 01:03:49 because you are literally the bigger brother yeah that's true yeah it's like wow okay yeah you are the bigger brother yeah now you're the younger brother yeah but you're the bigger brother damn okay so that would really give you identity like yeah crisis yeah wow okay because yeah i think that it was and it actually it was when i started to get told and i'm that the thing started to like uh pivot for us as well but we didn't have the best relationship and then there was a couple years where I didn't speak to him at all and then I went to do Iwaska
Starting point is 01:04:25 and I was like I should probably figure this out do you know what that is? Yeah, absolutely. Have you done it or no? I haven't done, lots of friends have done it and it's changed your life. Yeah, it was really fascinating so that year I'd lost a few people to suicide
Starting point is 01:04:39 it's quite a big thing back on in Australia and New Zealand we have the highest suicide rate per capita a lot of young men take their lives and it's... I don't know that. It's highest, really, really, from men. Yeah, yeah, it's, it is really, like, horrible.
Starting point is 01:04:52 It's just, I don't know what it is. I don't know why it's a thing, but it was the reason why I started on this whole journey, but that year I'd lost two people, my best friend from the first TV show I'd ever did, and then one of my friends' moms who essentially, like, raised me as well. And I was on this, like, journey of,
Starting point is 01:05:11 because that was, I had three people in total that I'd lost the suicide. So I was on a bit of, of a journey that year trying to figure out what is going on. You know, I'm in LA, I'm making money, I'm drunk, I'm going out, I'm having fun, I've got this crazy lifestyle, but, oh, the purpose of me doing these shows was to make my friends laugh. And, like, I'm a class clown. My friends aren't laughing. They're actually not here anymore. So, like, what, so it made me have, like, question everything. And I guess, yeah, the I Waska, it kind of, it all just happened at the same time.
Starting point is 01:05:40 Like, it just flowed. And I'm like, okay, this is meant to be. So when I did this driven Costa Rica and um it's regardless of the the medicine in it it was like you meet the most incredible people but each day you're doing character building exercises which was it's always good to look within um the first time we did it the first night we did iwaska um i'm like seeing there right in my intentions i'm going to see my friends and we're going to be good and i'm going to get that peace whatever else dude i it snapped me into like specific memories with my brother and my dad i didn't have a relationship with my dad at that point as well and i'm sitting there as a kid.
Starting point is 01:06:16 Like, wow, this is this is a guy that made me the guy. You know, like, this is my man. Like, this is my best friend. And then it's snap. I'll be with my brother. We're running and we're having the best time ever. Like, real memories, real life memories that I had with these guys. I was reliving it, like, in the moment.
Starting point is 01:06:31 And I just remember weeping and laying in that in Costa Rica on this mat, just crying, not because I was sad, but just overwhelmed with the amount of love that I hadn't given them. And the amount of love of like, wow. this is, these two dudes are the reason why I'm the guy. And like, the reason why I'm here doing my thing. And like, if it wasn't for them, if it wasn't for all this stuff, like, I wouldn't know how to chop a tree. I wouldn't know how to be a beekeeper. I wouldn't know how to have a garden. Like, I wouldn't have grown up on a farm. Like, all this stuff. I was sitting there just like, wow, I'm so overwhelmed with love. So after that point was when I really rebuilt with my
Starting point is 01:07:05 brother and my dad and tried to come back around. But I just think it's, yeah, with me and my brother, it's just very, very difficult, very, again, maybe it's a tall thing. It's just, it's hard to be, to relate. And he overanalyzes everything I do, like I posted, this is the example. And I'm sure he's going to go off of him. I posted a prayer on my story that my friend had written. And he was perplexed by that because we didn't grow up with, religion. So we didn't grow up with anything. And I said, look, see it. I'm trying to figure out
Starting point is 01:07:44 what I believe in after my dad had passed. I'm trying to, like, I've got to figure out what's going on. Um, because regardless, if it's true or if it's not, I'd like to believe in something because it makes me feel good. And when I have a family, I want to tell the kids something. So like, say the goldfish passes away. Oh, well, he's in heaven. So don't stress. Um, so I posted this prayer and, and he like had like this massive, massive, like, reaction to it. And like, I don't know who are anymore like just weird shit just like you know like ask are you okay what's wrong like stuff like I'm like brother who cares it doesn't hurt anyone also I said take the dear god out of it it is the most beautiful mentor and show of gratitude to say out loud to start your year off right literally don't
Starting point is 01:08:28 care it doesn't hurt anyone makes me feel good so I'm going to do it so just like weird things like that and again I'm like we don't have a relationship where uh you could feel some type of way about it Also, like, you know, warranted, it's not a bad thing to post. Out of all the things I could post, that's probably the best thing. Yeah. I could be getting my bussy out, you know? You could be. And we don't, no one wants that.
Starting point is 01:08:54 I don't know, some people might. You know what? Yeah. Send my DMs. Some people may pay for that, actually. Well, link it by it. But I, man, you know what? I think when you were at ayahuasca and you reflected on the guys
Starting point is 01:09:10 that made you the guy, that's profound, you know, and that you included your brother in that. I'm just curious, have you ever told him that? I called him the next day after we went through it, and I sent him some money, and I was like, yo, what's going on? And then I was like trying to connect through that. This was, mind you, this was like three or four years ago. And he was really confused.
Starting point is 01:09:37 He was like, why he sending me money? Why didn't call me? and I was like, oh, I just did a ton of drugs. Okay. Yeah. I just had a crazy life-changing experience. He's got no idea what's going on. And I'm like, hey, how you going?
Starting point is 01:09:48 Let's be friends. Like, what's going on? But honestly, it was, it was good. It's just like a different, you know, sometimes you need to have a different perspective on stuff. And my old man, and it's quite a common thing in my, I guess, genetic bloodline is we have an addictive gene. So my dad had a bit of problem with alcohol. So, and I think that that's carried on in my family.
Starting point is 01:10:08 life not with alcohol for me but you know my brothers my sisters like everyone has kind of noticed sometimes we're overindulge a little bit on some stuff and it's made me like be fully like aware of that but um when i did that experience it was so cool because I really had the opportunity to separate the person and the addiction and I've never been able to go I've always just been hit it together and with anger and like why can't you control that like what's going on right Like, I don't get it. But then I'd be like, okay, we just put our personal boundaries on. Like, I won't speak to you at the phone after 4.30 p.m.
Starting point is 01:10:46 and just understand that maybe I might get an unraveled email at 11 p.m. But that's because that addiction is there. But the person will be all good in the morning. Yes, I see it. And that's the importance of boundaries. Yeah. So there's one more larger topic that I want to get into that you've been mentioning. but it touches upon this.
Starting point is 01:11:10 Ah, the boss. The boss. Yeah, there is. This experience you had with him, yeah. To me, was so profound. And as much as you'd like to talk about the experience, if you could first say, for those listening,
Starting point is 01:11:30 what was that that I just handed you? You had me a photo of me and my dad when we're in Bali. Oh, no, maybe it was Sri Lanka. And we were sponsoring. He was sponsoring your family there after there was like a tsunami or something. So I went to go visit them. But yeah, it was just a back when I was a little sausage. And I forget what he was showing me.
Starting point is 01:11:51 But yeah. So, oh man, Paul. He's the guy. Paul. Yeah. Great name. You went back? Yeah.
Starting point is 01:11:58 I'll give it back to you too. Yeah. Great name, Paul. So now your father recently passed away. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. December.
Starting point is 01:12:06 forth last year. Last year. Can you walk us through that experience for you? I think life is made up of, I always look at it as inflection points. Yeah. Right. And sometimes those inflection points, we go down to a darker place. Sometimes we raise up to a lighter place.
Starting point is 01:12:26 I'm trying to understand what that moment did for you. Dude, what a gift life. Like what a, what an incredible. thing. I got so incredibly lucky that, so my dad went through with a sister dying. He had an illness that was going to take him out in the next couple months. He didn't really want to wait around. He's like, fuck this, I'm going to go. So in New Zealand, you can go through with a sister dying, which is a really beautiful and special thing. And it obviously sounds pretty scary. But it's, you know, people who are sound mind, who have a terminal illness. And it's like,
Starting point is 01:13:02 the really rigorous process that I had to go through for him. to get greenlit for it. But how does that even, like even with your relationship, does he, you know, the first time that you hear, he is considering assisted dying? Yeah. What do you think? Dude. We, yeah, I just, he's just, he's so stubborn.
Starting point is 01:13:29 It's so funny. He was, he just, one of those guys that if something's happening, he's going to do it. He wanted to go with his dignity and he's, he's. didn't like, his biggest fear was like him losing like control over his body or whatever else. The annoying thing is like he was getting better. Like when I first went there and walking him on a wheelchair. Then the next time I come back he's like got a walking stick. The next day he's walking normal. I'm like, this motherfucker's lying. He wants to go. No, no. But it was, dude, it was, it's hard, it's hard to wrap your head around. It was really difficult. It was so
Starting point is 01:14:02 difficult because we had meetings for months with the death doc, which is not his official name, but that's what my dad kept calling him. And it was really difficult because number one, I had to keep a secret from my mom. So they weren't good. They went in a good spot. But I flew back to New Zealand and he's like, if she wants to know, she can call me.
Starting point is 01:14:24 And it was her birthday and she was getting remarried in the same weekend. So I had to fly. At that time, like I know she's good with my brother now, but at that time I was the only person in our families that was super close to my mom. So I flew back and obviously mom always knows when something's wrong. And it was trying to figure it out. I was like, look, I actually can't tell you.
Starting point is 01:14:47 I'm not allowed to, but if you want to know, you have to call the old goose. And the hardest thing is that they actually didn't talk on the phone, especially because it was my idea to, hey, like, let's just say one last goodbye. And to see them cry once I got back about it was the hardest thing. And it's been a bit of a weird thing to kind of wrap my head around. but those death conversations are really, it's really easy, you know, it's really easy to feel sad and, like, to beat yourself up on it.
Starting point is 01:15:14 It's so easy to be like, this is scary. The way I'm all good with it is because I got to know when he's going. Like, no one gets it. Like, what a privilege that is. I got so lucky that I knew and I could be there with him every day that we could eat cherries and we could talk in the morning and we go for a drive and we can laugh. I got to know, like, hey, this is when he's going and that's the day he picks.
Starting point is 01:15:42 So we're good. You know, that's such a privilege. Like, such a privilege to know that, like, yeah, I get to sit down with him. And we get to be in that moment when he takes his last breath. Again, super easy thing to be angry about it and to be sad about it. And I definitely want to do those emotions. But I think looking back and like, we kind of. nice to know when you're going and then to see who shows up and and you uh in the days leading up
Starting point is 01:16:10 or maybe even weeks leading up what do you do you do you live with him do you spend time with him how does it work oh man he uh um he so he was in like a like a elder care um we're in new zealand it was very small town mochaika and we're all staying at my sisters not all my siblings showed up which was kind of fascinating. And I still feel a little bit tired about that. And then even one of our other siblings were trying to get money out of the wheel before he was even gone.
Starting point is 01:16:44 And there was just so much random family drama for no reason. Like even another one wanted to, couldn't make it down because of work stuff. And I'm like, I'll just pay for your shit. Like stop being an idiot. You know, we have such a blessing here. It was just so much drama that was going on,
Starting point is 01:16:59 which was unfair on him. And because I was with him every day, and I could see it like weighing on it. Like it's already the scariest thing on the planet. Yeah, I can't imagine what he's going through. He's like, oh, this is all unraveling and I'm still here. I'd be sitting with him and my siblings don't know this, but I'd be sitting with him and just wish today was a day
Starting point is 01:17:20 because I'd see texts from people. I'm like, yo, it's like, turn this shit off. It is. So those days were difficult because we, you know, I just, the only goal was to be with him and to have a good day and to make him feel good. It's already scary. He's already got cancer. He's already got Sarasasid's living.
Starting point is 01:17:39 Like, he's already falling apart. He doesn't want to get out a bit. Like, he's sleeping all day. And, you know, I'm already trying to, like, let's wheel him out. Like, let's go get some sunshine. Let's go do stuff. And let's go to the beach. Um, and try and do things.
Starting point is 01:17:53 It's very difficult. And, um, yeah, it's very, very scary time. But it was the greatest, it was the coolest thing. So cool. Yeah, to see someone transition over, but also to still feel and with you. It was really cool. Yeah. That, if you are open to talk about it, is that last moment, how does that happen?
Starting point is 01:18:23 So with the assisted dying process, and dude, we had the best doctor. He's the man. I forget his name. He was so cool. So we had, my dad requested people to, you know, requested people to be there in that process. So he had one room in this hospice and we had another one opened up for where he wanted to, to cross over. And the doctor was there, gave him some value and stuff. He was in bed and I had a speech prepared.
Starting point is 01:18:56 So I was like, I need you there. I was really worrying about this. And then mind you, the night before, I thought it'd be funny to watch that movie, Death at the Funeral, Death at a Funeral. And now, mind you, not a good idea. Because I thought that that would be, that would make light of it. Worst thing ever. I couldn't sleep.
Starting point is 01:19:16 But, yeah, we sit down and I get to tell him everything I've ever wanted to tell him. And my sister, Sarah, she said, you have to hold his beat when he goes. Because that's where all the magic comes out of. I'm like, okay, so I'm sitting there, fucking squeezing his feet. And some of their kids are there. My brother-in-law is there. He's the man. Shout out, Dan.
Starting point is 01:19:41 And I remember I looked at the doctor. And we all had whiskey a good. He likes Chivas Regal. And wanted to make sure he had a good, good last one, like a nightcap before he went over. And I can't listen to Ed Shearing anymore. because that was Dad's song that he wanted to go out on. It was the song, Parding Glass. So I haven't listened to Ed Shearing since.
Starting point is 01:20:12 And if I ever see Ed Shearing, I'll probably, if I ever meet him, I'll try and give my hug. I'll just say, thank you so much for that beautiful song. But yeah, he looked at the doctor. He said, yeah, I'm ready. And he makes, so there's two ways you can go out. There's an IV, and the IV lights out super quick a couple minutes. the drink is meant to take 10 or 15 minutes so he meant to slow you go off to sleep and we got it advertised to us as like a really peaceful thing it was not at all he uh because my
Starting point is 01:20:44 dad hadn't really been eating at all because his stomach was off from the from the cancer and all the meds he he fell asleep pretty quick um but the problem is the death gogogle i don't know if you've heard of this you've heard of it it's the absolute worst thing on the planet and would love anyone to kind of be prepared if I just just know that when someone is trying to get air and their body shutting down it's it's a horrible thing to listen to and um it's kind of weird because I can't really remember it but I can't because I remember my head it felt like my my head was going to come out of my skin like I was just like trying to get all this all his magic but also just yeah it was really it was really cozy and then anyway he
Starting point is 01:21:34 went off and immediately went outside the first thing I did is I called my mom and I said hey mom that just this is everything that's happened the last month or so I told her everything I was in it was in this for her first time yeah yeah so first time she she she knew she's not like she's not silly but she knew someone was wrong and first time I told everything and um And then I went back inside and I couldn't really be around him. I couldn't really be around the body. I was really struggling with that. But the coolest thing is because my sisters are Moldi, their native museum,
Starting point is 01:22:14 in their culture, in the culture there, there's processes and stuff that they do, which is really cool. Like my sisters were like, we're keeping the body. No one's taking the body. This is out, is out that. You're not going to take them, you're going to burn them. We're doing everything. It was really cool, so they had elders come to the room two hours after they'd passed.
Starting point is 01:22:35 My siblings had got him changed and put him in a nice suit that we picked. And the elders come and did their ceremony. Because they said after two hours, the soul is out of the body now and it's there. The worst thing was putting his body in a coffin. That's the worst thing after the death rattle. you know he's just alive and he's normal he's stiff and he's talking and then now it's like he's flopping everywhere so me and my brother-in-law and siblings pick him up and put him in I must pass out put him in the coffin and then yeah we took the coffin and put it in the back of the
Starting point is 01:23:17 van and we took it to my sister's place and uh again because the culture in new zealand they keep the body at their house for a couple days um I thought and it sounds like it sounded like the worst thing on the planet but it was the greatest thing i was so glad that we got to be with him like it was the coolest thing because you get to walk into the room and just talk and just tell them everything and like tell them about what's going on day like i'd sit down like hey dad Quinn called and he sent flowers or hey dad this this person is checking in and they want to know that he's all good but everything's okay i got it like you just go sit at night with him and whatever else the weirdest thing and the hardest thing is just how cold they are and
Starting point is 01:23:58 and whatever else. But grief is so fascinating and it's such an undervalued emotion. Like, God, it was really wild to see everyone turn into their own superhero. Like, it was just really cool. Did you get a chance to give your speech? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, I told him.
Starting point is 01:24:17 Yeah, it was cool. Yeah, it was really, really special. I got to read it for him and, yeah, it was. It was a lot of tears. And it was really nice. We were sitting there and I'm like, oh, Dad, like, I'm going to look up in the stars. I'm going to see you.
Starting point is 01:24:38 I'm going to look here and see you. He said, no, it's just going to go to black. I'm like, no, I don't want to believe in that. I don't want to believe in that. So that's why I've started this, like, journey after, whether it's, like, Christianity or whatever else, like, to find a higher power or God. So I've started reading the Bible and trying to figure out what I, what you believe in, What I believe in?
Starting point is 01:24:56 Because there is something, and I think it's all just universal. Like, I like the morals and stuff. I need some help with that. But just you're on the pathway to discovery is the most important. So now, I mean, having gone through that, and thank you for sharing that. Yeah. Like, I think as you said it, that was beautiful. It's the best, man.
Starting point is 01:25:17 It was beautiful. So cool. You know, what have you learned about grief? Dude, grief is. It never goes away and I never want it to go away. I want to always feel when I think of my dad. I want to always feel sad. I always want to feel when I think of him.
Starting point is 01:25:36 And I love that about grief. I love it so much. I love that some days I'll be having the best day ever. And then it's ruined because I'm like, damn, where's the old goose? I love the control it has on me. It's so nice. It's so nice to feel and think about that person. When was the last time you could ever think of something?
Starting point is 01:25:57 someone and it brings you some overwhelming amount of tears. Dude, I wish I had that control on people. That's so cool. Like, that motherfucker's got me forever. He'll just plonk into my head and ruin my day or make me so happy because my dad would love this. But with Greek, though, someone gave me a really good quote that it's like standing on the beach. You know, sometimes the waves will go all the way out and you won't see him for a couple
Starting point is 01:26:19 days, but sometimes it'll come all the way in and knock you over and it'll be a tsunami. Like it's always, it's always going to come and go. just know the tide is going to go out, but the tide will always come back in. So I really loved that about grief, but I just, it's also really fascinating to see how everyone navigates it because there's no right way to go about it. I realize that when having so many people around when my dad passed, seeing each, like, my brother kind of turned into like a commando. He's like, ta-da-da-da-da-da.
Starting point is 01:26:51 Everything has to get done. My sisters, their soft, beautiful energy, like mothering everyone, and keeping them locked in. My mom, you know, pushing, pushing me away. But me, it was like, got to be alone. Gotta be isolated. Like, not mad or not sad or anything, but just like, I'm just kind of walk. I think I said to like Forrest Gump.
Starting point is 01:27:10 It's like, I'm just going to just walk. Yeah. Just walk and just just be, be me. So it's very fast. I think that's the coolest thing. It is like when someone's happy, you know, everyone feels happiness. Everyone's happy. But like grief, it's like, everyone is.
Starting point is 01:27:25 so different with that. Like, it's so, so weird. Like, you know, when some people see traumatic stuff, they laugh. They can't help it. Yeah. Like, so sad. It's very cool. You know what, Harry, my only, uh, great, my only issue with you in everything that
Starting point is 01:27:40 we've talked about thus far is you're not being proud of yourself. Oh, wow. You know what I mean? Because I think that the way, if I can, you know, if I can impart some wisdom on you. Yeah, please. The, the one thing that I see, uh, that many people do is, you know, is that I think that I can't, you know, is they look at joy or being proud as the destination. So it's like, I'm doing all of this
Starting point is 01:28:03 to get to this particular place over here, this destination, and then I will be proud, right? Whereas the joy comes in the journey to the destination. And what you've described is a very rich life. Yeah. Like because of your experiences, but more so because of your ability to reflect on those experiences.
Starting point is 01:28:25 become better. Like every day you're becoming better. I see it. Like you're a totally different person than you were on the first reality or the second reality. You know what I mean? You're like you are evolved. Damn. Into another person. You should be proud of that. Okay, I'll write it now. Yes. Thank you. You really should be. Yeah. Last question. Okay. Everyone gets it. That is you've had incredible conversations throughout your entire life. Yeah. Which one stands out as the most memorable. And so who was it with?
Starting point is 01:29:00 And what did you learn? Wow. What a good question. I would have to say, like, now at top of mine, it's probably like the last kind of conversation with my dad. You know, like that was special. Obviously, well, obviously, because we can't do it again.
Starting point is 01:29:24 I think that was really powerful. But I think this was one of the greatest conversations. have had. Wow. Yeah. I really love that. Yeah. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:29:31 There's a lot of things I've never really spoken about or let my brain like go down that path because I'm pretty jockey. I'm like, oh, just got to go funny. You got to make it laugh. So yeah, I think if there's one thing, it would be my dad, this conversation and then talking to God or whoever that is. Because I've been really finding a lot of power in that and motivation. and just knowing that everything is within.
Starting point is 01:30:04 Anything you want to do is right here. You just got to think about it and talk and it's going to happen. Yes, yes. You know what I think is probably most incredible about you? And this isn't me trying to just gas you up at the end. Five, 12 million followers. What is it? 12 million, you keep fluctuating on the numbers.
Starting point is 01:30:24 Whatever. Well, after this, 50. 50. Yeah, right. You're after this. Definitely. This is the one. This is the one.
Starting point is 01:30:30 This is the one. I've seen you open up here like never before. That's my guy. That's because you're really good at this. Oh, what? It's his hot-ass house. But this is truly, so I remember reading about X, the X factor. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:30:47 Not the show. I'm not doing that one. Can't sing about that. But the X factor, which is something that a lot of researchers say a very small percentage of people are born with. Wow. And the X-Factor is something indescribable, but something that a very small number of people have that makes them extraordinary.
Starting point is 01:31:09 It makes people ultra-compelled to them. And when you walked in here, in a second I was like, this guy's got the X-Factor. And it's not being 6'5 only. Because I've seen people who are 5 feet, you know what I mean? They got it. And they got it. You have got it.
Starting point is 01:31:30 You truly, truly. I mean, I'm like, I'm a people watcher, man. You've got the ex-packer. Thank you, mother. And to whom much is given, much is required. And the one thing that I want you to definitely leave with is that you've got a lot of young men who look up to you and will find inspiration in how you are evolving in your life and how and your self-reflection and your search for religion and you're opening up a, about grief and you're reflecting on your relationships, they're going to learn from you.
Starting point is 01:32:05 So as you started as this young boy, wanting to make people laugh, I think ultimately what you're going to be doing is you're going to be changing the lives of many people by them witnessing how you change your life. Wow, look at you. Yeah, man. Dude, that's you.
Starting point is 01:32:22 That's not- You got it. No, I thought X Factor you're gonna bring out all my exes. I'm like, yeah. Well, actually, that's the bonus round. Oh, where are they? I miss him. Then I'll text me back. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:32:32 Where are they? No, dude, you're the best. But truly, Harry, thank you. Really appreciate your time. You're the Vib. Yeah. Right. Harry Jousy, I think that's my new BFF.
Starting point is 01:32:45 There's just something so warm about him that we all felt it on set, the moment that he walked in. He's special, really special guy. I'm shocked at the fact he is not proud of himself. I am incredibly proud of him. If you look at the steps that he's taken, if you look at how he's able to reflect on his life and the lessons he's pulled, he's matured. That's something to be incredibly proud of. Harry Jousie, a deserving superstar on the rise. After Love Island, I didn't want to be here anymore.
Starting point is 01:33:22 I thought that was going to be the best thing. I don't want to cry. I was like, no, mentally okay. Mora Higgins is known after her skyrocket into the public eye through her appearance on Love Island. Mora has built a career in the spotlight and on today's show, we'll step behind that spotlight to discuss her deeply personal challenges, battling grief, infidelity, and navigating the pressures of her rapid rise to fame. I definitely wasn't there for love. I'm literally going in because I've been cheated on. I was on a revenge strike.
Starting point is 01:34:03 I had a breakdown. I had dark thoughts. How dark was it? You have an experience with sexual assault. We got in a taxi coming home from a night out, and my friends got dropped off before me. I fell asleep, and I woke up and his hand was up my skirt. My partner at the time blamed me for that.
Starting point is 01:34:23 Blamed you. Yeah. He said you shouldn't have drank that much. He basically told me it was my fault. What about relationships? If I'm seen with a man, I'm sleeping with them. Watch out. Yeah. Spring just slid into your DMs.
Starting point is 01:34:36 to your DMs. Grab that boho look for that rooftop dinner, those sandals that can keep up with you, and hang some string lights to give your patio a glow up. Springs Calling. Ross, work your magic. Starting a business can seem like a daunting task, unless you have a partner like Shopify.
Starting point is 01:34:56 They have the tools you need to start and grow your business. From designing a website to marketing, to selling, and beyond, Shopify can help with everything you need. There's a reason millions of companies like Mattel, Heinz and all birds continue to trust and use them. With Shopify on your side, turn your big business idea into... Sign up for your $1 per month trial
Starting point is 01:35:16 at shopify.com slash special offer. I want a family. I'd love a husband. But I don't need one. I genuinely don't. Have you ever been in love?

There aren't comments yet for this episode. Click on any sentence in the transcript to leave a comment.