We're Here to Help - 176: Samples & Raised by Elves

Episode Date: June 2, 2025

Jake and Gareth help a caller whose father is stealing her toilet paper. Later, a caller has a very specific bedroom request. Plus, a follow-up from Ep 164 "A Wig on a Wig."See caller images here!Want to call in? Email your question to [e-mail]: https://patreon.com/heretohelppodMERCH: heretohelppod.comINSTAGRAM: @HereToHelpPodIf you’re enjoying the show, make sure to rate We’re Here to Help 5-Stars on Apple Podcasts.Advertise on We’re Here to Help via Gumball.fm See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

This episode of We're Here to Help is brought to you by Gemini. Oh, Jake, it is. To us, Gemini was an American gladiator. But not to the kids of today. We're talking exams, essays. This is stressful stuff. We went through it. We were on our own. But Gemini is offering something really great for college students. So if you are a listener of We're Here to Help and if you want a little extra help, Gemini Advanced is now free for college students in the United States of America. Sign up before June 30th and you'll get free access all the way through spring finals

2026. So Gareth, when you use Gemini, which we both use, what do you use it for and what do you like about it? There's sometimes like if there's a topic that I think I want to do stand up on or if there's sometimes like if I'm writing something for my other show, it's just like a way to kind of have something. It just gives you all the information and right away you go, oh, OK, now I actually get this. Now I can personalize it. Visit Gemini.Google slash students to learn more. Terms apply.

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And we are back! Alaska Johnson. Butavia Gareth. That's damn right, buddy. What a name. So Rob, aka... Wait, can I tell you something first? Yeah.

I got a pitch on what the fans can call themselves. Okay. You ready for this? Yeah. We're herdos. Like weirdos, but we're herdos. That's pretty good, I like that actually. All right, here we go.

Pretty good. All right, that's all I got. Have a good day everybody. Enjoy the show. All right, Rob. You got something, Rob, right before we got on, he said he's got a little video and a comment, but Gareth and I are in the dark. And by the way, I'm doing more

than my one sip of coffee, everybody. Is that right? Yeah, I fell off. How, yes you should. I just need to say, because other people were writing in that they also do the one sip and it was working. They just want you to see them. Fine, I see them, but I'm now telling them I fell off.

It doesn't work. Are you admitting now the one sip doesn't work? Last night I was on a ship looking at Arcas drinking glacier ice mixed with tequila. Oh my god, you had a tequila in Glacier? And it's hard to stop. Can I get a Tito's in iceberg? Well, one of the things they do is they go, they pull over and they pull up some ice and then everyone's passing it around

and after it's touched everybody's hands, somebody was like, dude, it's so clear, we should lick it. And I'm like, so many hands have been on it. And then one of the bartenders goes like, no, no, no, we should lick it. I'm like, so many hands have been on it. And then one of the bartenders goes like, no, no, no, we have a thing. We're gonna bring up ice and make drinks. But right before a bunch of people making a movie, we're all gonna start licking ice.

We should all share the lick. Yeah, and there was a moment where I'm like, are we gonna start going around and licking this fucking thing? And you would, right? If you were fifth? You would. I would, right? If you were fifth? You would. I would, but I would not. I would do the, what's the theory behind this?

And somebody would go, he's ruining the ice. Just throw it back in the water. I would have died at Jonestown so fast when they were drinking the Kool-Aid. You would have survived and I'd have been like, Jake, shut the fuck up, drink the Kool-Aid already. This guy means it. You would have robered from Shark Tank.

You would go, I'll drink it first while I do the cool man, the lazy man dance. I take it out of a couple other people's hands. Don't mind if I do. I'm dying so fast. Just dying on my third one without it even going down. You would do it so fast that the leader would go like, slow down,

people in the back aren't gonna die yet. You're blowing it. You're blowing this for me. You die and other people go like, Yeah, I think I'm good. And then I get up and I'm like, I'm actually okay! Die again. Alright, Rob, what do we got? Alright, we got a clip from

Jillian Bell's episode that we got some comments on. Let's revisit that. Who's in trouble here, me or Gareth? Gotta be you, cause I might...oh no, maybe it is me. Yeah, let's see. Before we do this father daughter dance, we wanna throw to something really special

that a young woman said about her dad and her man, G-Man's gonna drop a beat over. So this is a conversation that really happened, folks. G-Man, take it away. The things that I love the most about my dad are that he's hilarious and like is also like I mean just so funny, but it's also like very Like I have

Anxiety and he has been like so wonderful with it. Yes. Yeah Like so yeah What makes you so makes him so wonderful with your anxiety? How does he handle it? He is just like pretty patient. Which because I mean, as you know, with anxiety, it's like the most thing can be. All right, you get the idea. I don't get the idea yet. I'm not sure. Can you post the whole thing somewhere Rob? Yeah, that's gonna be stuck in my head That's catchy this was the comment that came in this was and I'm not exaggerating the worst beatboxing

I've ever heard from Gareth sounds like he's making yum noises and having diarrhea even spelling my name wrong It's tough, but come on, there's worse beatboxing. That was, that, there is, come on now. Here, there is worse beatboxing. I'm not saying it was good. It was better than expected. The problem was is you were so close to the mic that it sounded like farts.

I will admit, in retrospect, it did sound like someone with food poisoning. Because I was listening to it first and I thought like, alright the kids got some rhythm and then I went like, that sounded like a fart. We had the same experience. We had the same experience. I was like, you know what this is age-pretty- well that's not good. That's not good. Once the farts came in it was ruined.

Yeah. It was too, it wasn't, it should have been more like that. All right, let's hear it. Let's hear take two with less farts. Hmm. Hmm. Hmm. Hmm.

Hmm. Hmm. Hmm. Hmm. Hmm. Hmm. You're really weird, man. It's.

You asked for it. I know, but did something happen with your face when you beat Bugs? Let me ask you a question. Have you practiced in the past? You know, I'll be honest, my buddy Brett is very good at it, and I'm doing an impression of him doing it, and it's nowhere near what I should be.

You know who's very good at beatboxing is Olivia Munn. Is she? Not even as a joke. Wow. It was like one of those things, we were doing New Girl, I think, and you know how people go talking about random skills, and she did the thing you did of like, I can beatbox,

and then at first you go, it sounds good, and then you go, it sounds like farts. I don't know, okay, keep going. It just feels like you, go ahead. Stand up a long story just to say that again? That's exactly what I was about to say I don't have an end to my original story No, but then she crushed it in a way that was

Shocked we are like, oh you can actually beat box in a crazy way and I think you can that's that's that's what I wanted This to be but well, I think the comment I think you were close. Well, here's what happened Natalie and I couldn't hear it. So- So it's a Zoom problem. It's a Zoom problem because we would have called that out early and said, move away a little bit, there's some fart sounds.

You guys could have noted me away from the diarrhea. Yes, agreed. And now I think that is unsendable to the caller. But I don't think that's fair. I think. Could you imagine that playing at a wedding? I think at a wedding, that's a good vibe. I think that's, I think you're,

look, we're having some fun. I just don't think you're putting yourself in. You've catered a lot of weddings. I mean, I think. I would love that if I was catering a wedding. I would die. I think it would, I don't know, I mean maybe the people can let us know what they think

if that should be played or not, but I think it could. The caller's here. Can we really fast before we go, can you take us out with a little bit more of that beatboxing? Sure, absolutely. Not you, the video. Oh, yes, yes, yes.

I don't know why you said not you like that, it's like you could have just been like, Garrett. Because Rob just popped on the video, we both saw him. I didn't see we were having a conversation Willing to be like okay. Let's go walk around Let's go walk around fine like we're gonna get up from this nice dinner table that we're at with our whole family And we're gonna go outside and walk around And he will be like... See, there's a moment!

There's a moment! There's a moment or two! And without further ado, here's some ads. Jake's on the cut, look at you relapsing. This episode is brought to you by Squarespace. Squarespace is an all-in-one website platform designed to help you stand out and succeed

online. You want proof? Go to garethrentold.com. I love the little curly-haired ginger. Lord knows I do. I've known him for 20 years, but I wouldn't call him the sharpest tool in the shed. I wouldn't call him the dullest, but I would say he was a little closer to the dullest than the sharpest. What's my point? You may be asking. Gareth Reynolds dot com is Squarespace,

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slash gilsentme for a free trial. And when you're ready to launch, use offer code gilsentmesquarespace.com. This episode of We're Here to Help is sponsored by the crisp, refreshing, angry orchard. Listen guys, there's a litany of things we shouldn't get angry about, but let's be honest, sometimes it's hard not to be. Don't get angry at Piggly and Moe and say that it makes no sense and nobody would fall for it.

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Your order go to hero dot co and use code help at checkout. That's help at h e r o dot co and use code help at checkout. That's help at h-e-r-o dot c-o. Hi, welcome to We're Here to Help. Can we get your name? Rough age? Yes. Go ahead. Jump in. You know you're going. My name is Sarah. Welcome to my show. Hello. I'm 41, roughly. Sure. And I live in Okay. Roughly. Sure.

And I live in Georgia. Go ahead, Sarah. What's going on? All right. So this started about 10 years ago. Okay. My dad, we actually lived in a different state at the time across the country. My dad would come and visit.

And at the end of his visit, typically he would say, do you have a roll of toilet paper I could take? And my husband and I were both like, what? I mean, sure, you can have a roll, but you don't have any toilet paper at home? And he's like, I just want to stop on the way home. Like you're, you're totally out. That's what you're telling me. So anyway, fast forward, we moved to the same city and you know, COVID hit and my dad would periodically come visit and ask us for roll toilet paper what the time you know COVID days we didn't want to send to the grocery store

for a roll over time it's just escalated to now he doesn't ask he just steals toilet paper. This is really weird stuff. It is it does feel as weird as it gets. Your dad steals toilet paper from you. From you. I never in a million years thought I would hear this from you at the start. Nope. He's a great dad, great dad, great grandfather. Sure. He comes over to visit, not just for toilet paper, I'm assuming.

And we'll be like putting the kids to bed. And one night my husband just caught him in the garage like he thinks three rolls. He'll never take a whole pack. Three rolls? Shocking. Disgusting. What's going on? And also he does not have, he's not in financial trouble. You know, we'll just say that. But he'll say things like, oh, I'm just, you know, it's just me at home. Don't need a whole buy a whole pack like like a whole pack is so many rolls that he would be Bombarded with toilet paper in his home, you know with mini closets. This is why yeah, okay Keep going. I mean, well, I think nowhere we're headed my problem is my dad is stealing our toilet paper and We would like for him to stop Great is there any other back backstory? No, that's great. Is there any other backstory you feel we should hear?

You know, I can say that I think my husband's hat, we'll say he's a high maintenance toilet paper user. So we are buying top tier toilet paper. You know what I'm saying? It's not cheap. Multiply. You multiply. Quilted comfort. But you know, when my dad pulls up a new convertible and he throws toilet paper in because he doesn't want to buy it for himself, you know, it just doesn't feel like it. Your dad has a new convertible.

It's not great that he's, I mean, because he saved all that money. He's throwing the toilet paper in the car and he drives off in a new convertible. He's got all, he's saved so much money on not buying toilet paper, he's got a Corvette. If my dad was stealing my toilet paper and then had so much extra cash while me and my

wife are struggling that he buys a convertible with the savings, I don't even know what to say. You know, he does have a pattern. Okay, what's his pattern? It's not the only area of his life where he has done things like this. When I was talking to my brother, I called my brother to say, hey, I'm gonna be on this show. Yeah.

And he said, oh yeah, what was the story? And I told him, you know, I was like, oh, it's the toilet paper. He was like, oh yeah, you should tell him. He hit me up for copy paper when he was here. Copy paper? What? Copy paper, you know, like print paper.

What's going on with dad? What was dad like growing up? This is wild. He's like a paper sa paper. What's going on with dad? What was that? I burn up. I this is why he's like a paper saver Born in the depression raised during the brush and had kids during the depression era. Oh, yeah I knew that you don't have to tell me that twice. I got that in my family You know, I don't want to play into stereotypes. Okay, so I'm gonna just I'm just gonna describe him He's from New York. You can do some stereotypes. He's from New York He's from New York. He

Has doting older parents. He was an only child. Okay. He loves a good sale And coupons and lots of bagels. This is our... This is... Okay. I love that. His favorite show is Seinfeld. Is his name Kroko? Hey Jake! Give me that toilet paper honey. But I think...

I think like you're saying Jake, my mother is very much like this too. My mother is like a Like wherever there's a saving like a bit of savings to be found She's on top of it loves it. So if she sees something like calling me savings. All right Okay, so Sarah I got some pitches right out the gate for you. Jake. What are you? What are your wheels turn? What do you got? Yeah, I'm just thinking of Pam on top of me calling me savings. Alright, so anyway, we will, uh, here's what I'm gonna say, Sarah, because we, like, like

you said, back on track, like you just said, back on track. Like I just said, back on track. Exactly, thank you. We're using it right away. Can we focus? Jake, Jake, Jake, not a word for right now because I see the wheels turning and I'm in a bad direction. Alright, three, two, one, back on track. Sarah, here's what I would say. I would, the only way to,

I think you've either got to let him know you know without confronting him, or you've got to make him lose interest in your toilet paper. So I would say, first option, hide it all. Just hide it all. Just don't put it where you put it now and make him go in there when he's going to steal it and be like, what the fuck? The other option, you're buying the fucking top tier stuff. Hide the top tier stuff and go get some of those Scots, those public restroom nightmare roles,

because I think he likes your brand. So show him that you've downgraded to the airport bathroom style toilet paper. He's gonna lose interest very quickly. And the last pitch- Wait, can I pitch on that really fast? Yeah, yeah, go. Sarah, I would go to a gas station, use the bathroom,

take as much of it as you can, put it in a grocery bag, and then the next day we come over. I'm going to steal it? Listen, listen. I'm now stealing? You might barf in your car, you might barf in your car, so you just bring it. You're allowed to take a bunch of it.

And it's so cheap it breaks, it's disgusting toilet paper. So then when you get home and he comes over and goes, hey FYI we just got you the toilet paper so you don't have to take our new stuff. But the stuff that's for us, but we love you, here's some toilet paper. He'll look and go, what's this? And you go, we just stole it from a gas station,

but use this. And he'll go, it's paper thin. Or you could just buy your own. And he goes, buy my own. And you go, or you could just buy your own. And he goes, buy my own. And you go, sell the convertible, you son of a bitch. Well, I think that was kind of where my last one was going, which is like, you could have his own like toilet paper. You could do two things.

You could have the thing that's for him in the garage now labeled, you know, Dad's TP. Or I was thinking you could just have a jar with a label on it that says the TP fund and it's TP tips. And it's your way of saying, yeah, you want to come in here, you're allowed to take what you want. But you know, it might be nice to throw a little money our way since again, you have a convertible. I would take away the subtlety of that.

And I would say when he comes over and he grabs it, you ring him up. That's, he goes like, That'll be $50. But you know, not even 15, you give the exact price. But then you gotta pay for your gas too. So it's a bad deal. So he starts walking out and you go like this,

Hey, daddy, daddy. And he goes, yes, sweetheart. You go like this. That's good. It's 2.99 for the toilet paper plus tax takes us to 3.25 plus gasoline takes us to 4.05 plus my time takes me to 5.15 for the toilet paper. And he goes, 5.15 for a roll of toilet paper? That's a terrible deal.

And you go, no, no, no, I know. But you're also like with Instacart, you gotta pay the extra stuff. And then the 10% tip is going to take us to $6 even. And he's going to go, I'd never spend six dollars for a world. I told the paper and then you go, just go to the grocery store and get your own. Yeah. Sell the convertible. Yeah.

He doesn't need to sell the car. Every bitch, he's got to sell his car. But Sarah, what do you think? So he's fine. You can try. I love this guy. Yeah, I wish he was calling because boy, I mean, we would be like, you know, you have no idea. You have no idea. OK, I like I like all of this.

The thing is that I'm wondering if I downgrade the toilet paper that he's taking from the stash, if he's just going to take the good toilet paper from the house. You know what I mean? Because what do you mean? Sarah, this needs to be a confrontation. You can't just have him walk in your house taking your stuff. And what happens?

Guys, we've caught him. My husband caught him in the garage and he goes, hey, bud, what are you doing? Oh my God. Like a raccoon in your trash? That feels and I can say this as a half Jewish guy that feels anti-semitic She wasn't doing stereotypes, but your little ass took it too far Of course you are! I can't believe it!

And yet some people describe us as raccoons and drugs! Nobody's, what are you talking about? Guys! Thank you, Sarah, you're exactly right. Good Lord. Would you like another story about him giving an example of me? Yes! Obviously.

You want, you do want another story? Yes! So it was day three of Hanukkah. Okay, alright. Obviously. You do want another story? Yes. Day three of Hanukkah. Okay, all right. Instead of oil, it was toilet paper. And this raccoon's running around in the trash. He'll go to an all-inclusive with empty bottles. He'll go to what?

An all-inclusive like an all-inclusive... Oh, an all-inclusive resort. Okay. Resort with empty water bottles and he will fill them up with liquor and he will fly them home. This is next level awesome. Sarah, do we have other stories? Jake, can we just enjoy that for a, I mean. I love it, I just want more. So he's checking a bag. I'm as greedy with these stories as he is with his life. So he'll fly them home and then he'll pour them into bottles.

Like nicer bottles. Sometimes they're the same, sometimes they're the same liquor and sometimes they're different liquor. And then he'll just put like, if it's a vodka, but inside it's tequila, it'll just be like a sticky note. It's just fake tequila. Oh my god.

You know, there's a really funny account on Instagram that I followed and started DMing with the guy a little bit. I think it's called like Old Jewish Men. Oh my god. It's just this guy with a huge mustache who, he's trying to sell a bunch of merch now, of course. But it started off, he would just like walk around and give his opinion on stuff and what sandwiches he likes.

And lately he's all about just going to Costco and buying rotisserie chickens and saying like, where do I scan it? Where do I scan it? So. Okay, I have the feeding of Costco. I do have another example. Samples. He did.

Samples. He did. Um. All right. He got a part-time job at Costco. Oh God. Oh gosh. For like four or five months.

And it was just to get all of the bins that the wine came in. Like, what? What do you mean? What do you mean? What do you mean? What? What?

He's like obsessed with the wine boxes, like the free wine boxes that all the wine comes in. So he was working in the wine section and he would get the free box. We had like boxes. You mean like the wood, like crates? Yes, yes. He got a job at Costco.

So he could get- He said he was bored. For five months he worked there just to get wooden crates at Costco. This is a character I'm born to play in 25 years. This is without question. Also, who would like to... yeah. The part you're born to play.

Samples the man. Gareth, I also gotta say for a second, and I'm sorry, Sarah. You're doing great. Thanks. What a great show we've created. It's just endless. It's so fun. It's

I'm on four hours of sleep. I wasn't feeling it. I was like, do I call and cancel? I'm not sleeping in Alaska. The sun never goes down. Oh, man. These callers, Sarah, you're part of the Sav, you're part of the, holy cow,

do the callers make this show special? Sarah, do you got any other stories? Oh God, now you're making my day. Oh, you're making it, you're making mine. I have too many stories. So I don't know how we're gonna- I don't think I'm doing my job though. Yeah, well it's hard.

You see how we get in the muck on this a little bit, but one last story, and then we'll try to... This is such... I don't even know how to pitch on it. Maybe the pitch on this is, can we get him on the show? I honestly... Oh, my God. I hate to say it. I'm starting to just be like,

let this man cook. Me too. And I think talking to him would be awesome. Just not even to like, not even to intervene. Just to peel the onion for a while. Yes. Yeah, my friend used to say that he was the real life Larry David and that if he ever watched

Peruvian Thesiasm, he would be like, I don't get it. Like what is weird about doing things in his life? So here's what I think, Sarah. I got a real pitch for you. I think what we need to create, so you obviously adore the man, you find him really funny. I do love him, he is amazing.

He's a great dad. Yeah, my dad was an incredible character, not cheap, but so funny. And I will say, to get a little sentimental, there is a moment where these guys go and when they go, there's not many more of them. They're not being built like this anymore. This is a very specific type of person that we're losing.

These characters are so great. And once that whole generation is gone, there's not like a new group of 13 year olds who are eventually going to be samples. They're going to be something totally different. That's fair. And so what I would say is let's lean into the game of samples, but let's buy and mess with them. You know, really cheap brands of toilet paper, but put it in an expensive outer. So get the good stuff

and have the bag for you guys. But then where, you know, he just steals, put the cheapest toilet paper so that samples thinks he won, gets home, wipes his butt and goes like, ow, it's like sandpaper. I love it. I also think why not have your brother take a ream of printing paper and just wet it, let it dry in the sun, and then put that in the original packaging too

so when he gets home it looks like old treasure maps. And he's like, what am I gonna do? And I think Jake's right, and I think the celebration of samples is maybe the right direction. And might I take us a step further and suggest that when you're catching samples in some samples moments, film him.

Film him in his element. Film him in the garage stealing your toilet paper. Send it to us. And let us create the lore on our Instagram of samples, the legend. That's right, Sarah. Can you, and you could do it really easy. None of these are sponsors, but like a ring camera. So these stuff is getting so cheap now that you could get this stuff and motion sensor

record. Let's get a lot of footage of samples stealing. Oh my God. Or even. And just have it. And even. Or just living? Yeah, and just like living.

And just picking his brain a little. Just being like, sit down with him and say, you know, what is it about my brother's printing paper? And just have him kind of own it. I have an idea, I have an idea. Sarah, I'm gonna pitch another thing to you. Okay, tell me. Could you tell Samples that there's this new free service?

And what the service is, is it's these guys who do a podcast not named Pigly and Moe. No, they pass. And what they do is they- They pass obviously. What they do, cause you paid for this, they interview parents to record their history so that it could be passed on. And then we could sit and have an interview with you on it too,

where we all ask samples of questions. And you go like, dad, will you just do it for me? It's just, I want to record some of this stuff. And we could then say to him, and guess what? If it's anything like my dad, he's got to love the attention. Yes. And he's going to go like, it's like when I used to hang out with my dad,

we used to do a thing where it was pre we were here to help, but I just pretended I was a podcast host. And I'd go, dad, walk me through 1964. What were you doing? He'll go, and he wouldn't even realize it was a podcast host and I'd go, dad, walk me through 1964, what were you doing? He'll go, and he wouldn't even realize it was a weird transition and he'll go, 1964, I was out of college, I didn't know what I was gonna do.

Oh, he loves to talk about his wife. Of course, and then he'll go, tell me about 1969, my hair was down to my ass, it was the era of free love. Walk me into 1985, yeah, first thing I'm gonna say is kick in. era of free love. Walk me into 1985. Yeah, first thing I'm gonna say is cocaine. Are you gonna, are you gonna like weasel into like, so tell me about your toilet paper. Yes, of course we're gonna get to all of it. Why don't we do it? Because he's, here's the thing,

if he's gonna know, he'll sniff that out. He's no, um, he's no dummy. And then we're, and then I'm in trouble. No, you're not. No, you're not. But you know, I'm gonna do it subtly. This is what I would say. Let's split it Let's make it so you I would say if you and your husband At times when he's going in the garage, just put the phone in your pocket hit record walk in there and just go What's going on? We can use that and then maybe we do do like a special for patreon where you come up with five or six stories and you and him come on And you sort of limp them into these and then yeah, we just pick his brain as far as What he was thinking these moments that sound amazing?

The thing is that he doesn't know that this is weird in his world Like he can show up in our in an Armani suit and a Jag convertible and still just take toilet paper and it's like yeah this is what people do. Look, like most legends he's not gonna fit into a nice little bin. He's not where Costco keeps the wine. It's not that simple. So I think instead of us trying to put the fuse out, I think we want to light the wick a little bit higher and see what this firecracker could do.

So I just, should I just keep them given in my first class toilet paper? Is that what you're saying? Well, I think you want to, I think you want, yes. And I think you want to film him. And I think you want to ask what it is about your toilet paper. Yeah.

But I think Sarah, the pitch is what we do at first is we set up some cameras. We catch a raccoon in his natural habitat. I think we switch out the good from the bad, but we set traps. If you got a rat in your attic, you don't just... The first thing you don't do is just say, like, get out. You got to put a little peanut butter in a cage and we got to start setting them up a little bit. You're gonna be saving money by letting him

steal the bad stuff, but he's a wily son of a bitch. Raccoons don't go away easily. He sure is. He's gonna find a way through it. He knows where the hot dogs are. Title of your memoir. And then what we gotta get to is got to get to a long form interview that who knows where we could use it. It'll for sure go on Patreon, but it might be a

Wednesday episode. Yeah, it could be. Who knows? We'll find it. We just want to meet samples. We want to meet samples. And so Sarah, how do you feel? Do you feel like you have a solution? Are you happy you called? I've lost and I've won, you know? I think the truth is that... That's everybody including us. I think what happened on this call is that...

That's even Rabbit Grin, our producers. I think you solved a problem we didn't know we had. You solved a problem we didn't know we had. Okay, perfect. What was that? We didn't have samples in our life, and now we need him. Oh Excellent, so okay. I love it. We all need a cell. Well. Yeah, so we'll why don't just start getting some start getting some video And then we'll set up a very special samples Okay, I love it sounds great samples sale

Sounds great. Samples sale. Samples for free. It's nice to hear that the stories are as shocking as they seem to be. Oh, they're wonderful. You know, but I'm living it. It's it's one of the like it's one thing to like when I go to hotels, I'll like fill up my like my portable water jug in the gym. And to me, that's kind of quirky or funny To go to an all-inclusive resort with empty water bottles fill everything with liquor and fly home with it

And then sometimes pour it in a vodka bottle and label it tequila Now that's that's Hall of Fame stuff. I'm gonna give a quick croco connection to samples in terms of unbelievable characters that you can't believe what's happening, but when it's over, you wish there was more. My father's name was Krakow, or his nickname was. Short for. And as kids,

Krakashut. Yeah. And when we said, as little boys and little girl, as my sister, we said, why did they call you Croco? Croco, he said, because I was in a band called the Shits. There was Croco and Fullo and Tubbo, and we were the Shits. Like the Marx brothers. Yeah, and he said, I was the singer,

I had a long hair, mustache, we would play concerts, we were at University of Illinois, it was fun. So for years, whenever it would come up, you'd go, Crocco is because he was in a band of shits. It wasn't. Oh, my God. And then towards the end of my dad's life, we just got a little bit more sentimental,

and things changed at times. There'd be moments of clarity and truth. And I was in Chicago, and my brother and I were hanging out with Crocco, and we always would do games and mess with him, and I were hanging out with Krakow and we always would do games and mess with him and he would never know it but he would love the attention. And out of nowhere, he goes, my brother goes, would I probably remind you the time you were in the shits? And my dad goes, I was never in the shits.

And I go, what do you mean? And he goes, there was no band, that was a lie. And we go, what do you mean? And he goes, there was no band. That was a lie. And we go, what? He goes, I just lied about that. And we said, why? He goes, I don't know. And we go, why was your nickname Crack of Shit?

And he goes, because everybody thought I was a crack of shit. That means a liar. And my brother and I looked at each other, couldn't process it, and just went, great, what are we eating for lunch? And we all moved on. We didn't have any follow-up questions. 35 to 40 years of lying. Because I was a crock of shit full of lies.

The idea that he's done a 35-year lie and doesn't know why his name's Crocco. When he lied to us, when it started, I was five, my brother was nine, my sister was eight. And we're the shits. And we're all going like this, pretty cool. Don't even really know what a band is. Dad, when you were in the shit,

probably reminds you of when you were in the shits. I was never in the shits. But he said it so proudly, he was like, he's too old, he's 80 years old, he goes like, I was never in the shits with the band. I was never in a band. And we sat there and my brother and I were like, what is happening?

Hey, just call me that, cause I was a liar, cracker shit. And then one of us, we're like, Arch, we get some lunch, he's like, yeah, anywhere you boys want, I'm happy and hungry. Oh my god. Never had a follow-up question with it. If I could have got it on film Sarah this goes back to samples. I wish I had it. Oh well. Oh my god what a story. Thank you for the call. We love samples. Thank you. My real advice. Film it film it film it film it it. Yeah, let's preserve this. He belongs in a museum, and let's set up a very special samples. We will do it on Patreon no matter what, and most likely we will release it.

Have some of it on a release. Or we'll release it on a Friday, do three. Yeah, whatever. Yeah. Yeah. We love it. Crocco. Crocco's back.

Because it's just a stupid podcast. It's not even real life. Gareth, I'm talking on the Zoom. You're so little. I can't even see your little girly-girlies. Oh my gosh. Sarah, thank you for the call. Thank you, Sarah. Thank you guys so much.

Bye, bud. Bye. Holy shit. What world are we in, Gareth? Did we die and we're in heaven? This isn't a real show. This is paradise. Samples? Are you okay, Gareth? Did we die and we're in heaven? This isn't a real show This is paradise Samples? Are you okay Gareth?

Samples is incredible I think Gareth's not breathing. He loves samples as much as me I love samples and I love croco and the combination has really I don't know It's like baking soda and vinegar inside of my heart. What are we... I mean, if we were in a bar doing this, we'd be like, best night ever. Oh my God. That is so fucking... Jesus Christ. Jesus Christ.

Hello. Hi. Hi, how are you? I'm doing good. How about you? I'm not going to lie, caller. I'm a little rattled because we just did some Patreon stuff. And what I ended up reading with Jake was a fanfic scene that started out wholesome with Jake having to take care of my cat as I went and did stand updates, only to realize it was actually a little bit of a mess. I'm not going to lie, caller.

I'm a little rattled because we just did some Patreon stuff. And what I ended up reading with Jake was a fanfic scene that started out wholesome with Jake having to take care of my cat as I went and did stand updates, only to realize it was actually a little bit of a mess. I'm not going to lie, caller. I'm a little rattled because we just did some Patreon stuff. And what I ended up reading with Jake was a fanfic scene that started out wholesome with Jake having to take care of my cat as I went and did stand updates, only to realize it

was actually a little bit of a mess. I'm not going to lie, caller. I'm a little rattled because we just did some Patreon stuff. And what I ended up reading with Jake was a fanfic scene that started out wholesome with Jake having to take care of my cat as I went and did stand-up dates, only to realize it was actually a love story between Jake and my mother and I read my mother. Anyway, join our Patreon. Can we get you? All available on Patreon. I'm on your Patreon already.

Well, I've got some horrible news for you. It's a nightmare. Can we get your name, please? Sure. I'm going with the name Christine for this. Christine for this. And your rough age for this, please, Christine? I'm 28. And Christine, where are you potentially calling from or just name a city for your safety? I'm in Manhattan, Kansas. Manhattan, Kansas.

Okay. Christine, 28, Manhattan. A Manhattan, Kansas. Okay. Christine, 28, Manhattan. A lot of that might be fake. Doesn't matter. What can we help you solve today? Okay. So, the essential situation is I'm a perpetually single

woman, but this is not a dating question. I have a steady friends with benefits type situation with a guy who I'm going to call Alex. And he, you know, he's just a couple years older than me, totally normal guy, but we do a lot of, uh, role play stuff in the bedroom and basically army huge nerd. He's not. He's like a normal kind of masculine dude who has like very stereotypical manly hobbies. And I would really like him to role play as Aragorn from The Lord of the Rings. But I know he hasn't seen the movies or read the books.

And I know he'll agree if I ask him, but I him but I don't want him to fuck the character up. Interesting call. So your main worry is that the performance of the Lord of the Rings character wouldn't be up to snuff? Yes. I don't know the character. Can you tell me about him a little bit and Natalie, can we see an image of him? But before we do that, Christine, do you mind talking about what you like? His name is Aragorn. Aragorn.

Aragorn. A-R-A-G-O-R-N. And, um, so he's, uh, he's like descended from, uh, like from like the kings of the past and he's like a human, but will live to like a long age. He was raised by elves, but he's not an elf. And he's a direct descendant of the man who previously defeated the big bad in the books. So he has to like kind of hide his lineage or the enemy is going to like come after him and try and kill him. So it's

That's cool. Have you watched Lord of the Rings with him? No, that's the thing. We don't really hang out apart from sex. So I feel like it would be really unhinged to be like hey come watch this like three movie epic with me. Oh I see this guy who is it? Yeah yeah right that's it's um what's his name his name is uh okay long-haired Viggo Morton. Yeah Viggo Morton. So long-haired hunk with a leather jacket and a sword Yep, and he's a badass absolute badass Buddy comes from elves But he's not descended from elves his father died and was raised by elves

Yes, I will say this in Natalie's Natalie's search history because we can see her thing, the original tab is, Argon's sexy. I mean, I have to show the sexiest pictures of him for you to get the idea. Or you've searched this before. I approve. Yes. Are you trying to play Arwen?

Is this like the whole thing? I'm not trying to play Arwen, but I also, it's probably kind of weird, but I don't want to step on Arwen's toes in the fantasy. So like maybe if we could do it like, like before he's King of Gondor, maybe when he's like Strider, he's off being like Sexy Ranger of the North, patrolling the lands and protecting them from evil.

Mm-hmm, and you guys are doing this in an apartment? Yes. Okay. I'll tell you what, one thing that nobody seems as interested in this thing as me, and I'll drop it if nobody bites on this, but this guy was raised by a bunch of elves. He was raised by them, but he's genetically a badass. Yeah, but that's like a, I don't know, maybe that could get in the bedroom. Maybe there's something there. That he was raised by elves? What they can make gifts for Christmas? What are you pitching?

I honestly don't know. I think that's the weirdest part about the character. Like he was speaking elvish? I gotta be honest, I don't know. Here's what I see. Here's what I see. A long haired hunk with a sword and a leather jacket and the cool gloves with the fingers cut off. So I know that, I get that guy, he kills bad guys.

He's, but I'll tell you, I'll tell you where the role play could get fun. Flashbacks to his childhood. What are you talking, what are you putting, you're gonna have elf parents show up? I want Christine, you to be his first love affair, and you be his aunt's friend, and he just turned 18, and you're an elf.

Okay, so I... I don't want you to do this. This is a terrible idea. I think you've got to say, next time you come over, I'm down to have fun and do our evening, but you got to watch this with me, and then watch it and go, I want you to pretend to be him. Or I think what you say is you go, look, I really love doing this with you,

but there is one character I want you to play, but it actually means a lot to me. So I need you to maybe watch the movie from it and take it seriously because that'll really turn me on. Something like that. Christine, what if we did it via text? If we did it via text? Here's what I mean by that. You say to him, let's say you guys are going to see each other next Friday. Let's say you guys are gonna see each other next Friday. Say, excited to see you Friday at 1 a.m. or whenever he comes over. And you go, hey, let's plan the game on this one before

and just do it throughout the whole thing. No even greeting, just come in and we'll just start the game. Okay. And then his thought will be, sure, what's the game? Send him this image and say, you're this from Lord of the Rings and then go- Aragon. Aragon. Okay.

Say, if the voice and character aren't spot on, I'm not finishing the deal. Yeah. I mean, I think the main issue isn't even like, because he probably doesn't really need to know the lore. People in Lord of the Rings, they kind of like talk differently. I don't want to say like Shakespearean because it's not that dramatic, but it's kind of a little more like flowery and dramatic than normal people talking. You know what I'm going to ask, right?

Maybe. Let's hear it. Yeah. I have to, well, it's like, surely you know the scene where like, that everyone makes memes out of, where it's like, I will take the ring to Mordor, and like, you have my sword,

and everyone's all dramatic, and like kneeling on one knee, and they just use a lot more, they don't use like contractions like they don't say What they would say what is what is this? What do your elf eyes see, you know? So he needs to show up in a costume and no contractions Kind of yeah, I I think I like the idea of maybe texting it to him like Jake's sort of saying I think it might be a good way to just sort of look I think if it's important and he knows that and it's like sexually important that helps.

I do too. I mean it's. I don't bring up the elves, but so tell me tell me again the roadblocks because I don't think This is that hard to just say Let's believe I don't think I don't think he'd Want to watch the Lord of the Rings All right You know it seems have any interest in that stuff and I worry that if I if I ask him to do this, it's like

It's like giving him homework. Right. It's like who wants to do sex homework? Like a nurse is easy. All right, I got a pitch then. How about after the next time you guys hang out, you do the sexy nurse or whatever he wants. The male brain is fairly fried after this moment, and that's when you hit him with it. You say, hey, next time there's something I want you to do, but I need you to really get it right,

because that'll be the best version of it for me. I want you to hit him with this. Okay. But I think she's saying she doesn't want him to do the homework on it. Yeah, but you don't even have to. Well, I only want him to do the homework. I want him to want to do the homework, but I don't want to like make him do homework

because that's going to make it really unsexy. He's not going to do the homework. If you don't assign him the homework, he's not going to do the homework. Well, maybe what you could say is maybe you could text him, what's your biggest turn on? Okay. And then when he says, what's yours, you say, having sex with a guy whose role playing is this and can kind of do the voice. Yeah, I think that's pretty good.

Because then you're not saying watch the whole movie, just Google the guy. Go on YouTube, do the voice a few times. He knows when you're being a nurse, you didn't go to nursing school. And you can even just send him a clip from YouTube. And just say like this. Somebody who does something like this, and then he'll go, all right, I've already done the homework.

I watched the YouTube clip. Yeah, and then you can also just put disclaimer, he was not raised by elves. They were not. But he was raised by elves. I know. But we don't want him to know that. He'll get hung up like Jake.

And it'll change the character. He'll come in with bells on his shoes. It'll be a fucking nightmare. It'll just dramatically change the character. Yeah. This guy hates elves. But you just do that. I think that's pretty good.

I think if you just say something like that, you send a clip and you're just like, this is what I want. This guy hates elves. But you just do that. I think that's pretty good. I think if you just say something like that, you send a clip and you're just like, this is what I want. This guy. What do you think, Christina? Okay. So just like find some sort of like hot YouTube compilation. Yes. Of just Aragorn being sexy.

What if we did this really fast? Natalie, can you get on YouTube and see if somebody's already cut a hot YouTube thing in this guy? I'm sure somebody has. Yes. So let's see if somebody's already cut a hot YouTube thing? I'm sure somebody has. Yes. So let's see if there's one that exists. If I can find my favorites. Yeah. She signs in under Eric Ornography. Why are you sending us a Vimeo link? We asked for...

This was edited by you? Okay, here we go. I didn't put the sound on because it was intense. Let's hear a little sound. We got to hear the way he talks. And then for anybody who wants to see this at home, it's on YouTube, Aragorn's best moments. Hang on.

I'm sure I'm saying that name incorrectly. Yeah. You're not. You said it right. Aragorn. Hey. Pretty good. Oh, wow. Okay, we're watching the clip.

He's fighting a storm. I mean, Elijah Wood, I believe. Yep. He's taking off his aura ring. Had an orgasm. He came from taking his ring off. And Aragorn's out there with the sword. Or no, he's with the fire, fighting.

But if I'm watching this, I don't know what I'm supposed to do in the roleplay. I agree. I'm gonna come in with a torch. I'm lost. We're just seeing him. He's... I gotta see him talking. Okay, here we go. He's gonna talk here. Okay, now we're at minute 2.18. He doesn't talk that much. That's why I don't... That's why he's a hot man.

That's good for role playing. I would have gone with you to the end. Ooh. Oh. Into the very fires of Mordor. Okay, he's touching a lady's breasts. No, it's a guy. Or Elijah Woods. It's a guy, I think that's Frodo.

He's touching Elijah Woods boobs. He's gonna kill Frodo. Frodo can't get his whopper out of his pants. Run! It's not a whopper. Oh, I call swords whoppers. I'm calling anything whoppers. I agree.

Even the sandwich and burger thing. Okay, so here we can cut. He's a hunk. Yeah. But he doesn't say a lot, which I think is good for this. He doesn't talk that much. It's not a big talk. When you first meet him, he's like literally big talker. It's not really an issue. When you first meet him, he's literally just in a corner in a room being really quiet and

weird and mysterious. So then you just need the outfit. So he doesn't talk enough to blow it. All he's got to say is, like, hello, get in the bed. I was raised by elves. No, sorry. I didn't mean to bring that up. I was raised by normal people. It is a weird part of my past. Not only was I raised by by elves. No, sorry. I didn't mean to bring that up. I was raised by normal people.

It's a weird part of my past. Not only was I raised by some elves, there were tens of thousands of elves. And me, I was the largest. I was big. I didn't date in that world, obviously. What do you think, Christine? It feels like we're kind of right there? I would have the outfit picked out and just give it to him. And then just be like, next time, come over in this. He's not a chatterbox, but he talks softly. Send him one clip where he's talking a little bit.

Tell us what we're missing, Christine. I think you should just give him lines to memorize. Give him a script. Like, write a script? Five lines. No, just give him five lines that he can pull from and then say, don't, don't deviate. And then whatever you're going to wear, you need to send a picture or something because

there's got to be some incentive here. Okay. Yeah. So like I could do a really sexy outfit and be like, but you only get this if you're AeroBorn. Yes. Yeah. Yeah. Because otherwise there's no motivation, especially if he doesn't like this. He's not going to even know what you're AeroBorn. Yes. Yeah, yeah. Because otherwise there's no motivation,

especially if he doesn't like this. He's not going to even know what you're talking about. My outfit doesn't make sense if he's not AeroBorn. Unless you're, that's a nail. So if you're willing, I'll wear this and play this role. If you wear that and play that role. I think that would work really well. That's a way to make it a lot less like I'm just giving

his best homework. Fuck yes. Great. Christine, this is a win. Follow up with us. Okay, absolutely will. And Nat Attack, that's another victory for you. I mean I'm not gonna ring the bell early but yeah it's pretty good. You want a bell ring already Natalie? No, we should have a different Nat Attack bell. Yeah, she should just have a Nat Attack, Bill. Yeah. She should just have a sound effect like a panther. I was thinking the same thing. I was thinking like a haaa, haaa.

Yeah. Oh my gosh. Wow. Nat Attack. All right, Christine, thank you for the call. Thanks, Christine. Yeah, thank you guys for your advice. Appreciate you. Producer Sherlock here.

This next call is a follow up from episode 164, A Wig on a Wig. Hello. Hi. Hi there. Welcome back to We're Here to Help. Thanks. I'm so excited to be here. Well, we're Here to Help.

Thanks, I'm so excited to be here. Well we're excited to hear who you are, what your original problem was and where we led you and what ended up happening. So can we get your name again? Yeah, my name is Gemma. Hi Gemma. Any idea Jake? I remember the name Gemma. I remember the name Gemma, too

What was the original issue Gemma? The original issue was I Wore wigs and I was going on a work trip and I didn't know how to Convey to others. Sweet American girl, though. Yeah. And you came to one of my shows, didn't you, Gemma? I did. I did. Yeah, my husband and I, we went to your show. Yeah, in Virginia Beach. Yeah, Virginia Beach. Yeah.

What a that was a nightmare. Gareth Reynolds dot com. That was a nightmare. So what? The promotion. No, it was great. It was great. The milkman, the old man in the front. Oh, that was the old guy in the front. Jake, I wish you were there. So, okay Jemma, what was the advice you ended up taking?

Because you were wearing a wig that you kind of had painted yourself into a corner by wearing a wig. And Jake made the comparison to the all-American doll. Was that what it was, Jake? Gemma has great curly hair. Yes. In real life, so there's not a hair issue. Okay. And then for some reason you put a wig on during Zoob's

that made you look like an American girl doll. And then he said, what do I do now? I spent like $400 on these wigs and now you are going to like Florida or New Orleans or someplace really humid and you were like Should I wear the wig and gareth was really sweet and said like who cares do what you want and I was saying yeah Until you jump in a hot tub Well, how does it translate to the tub That's my merch

But what happens when you jump in a tub What about the tub? That's my merch. What about? Yeah. But what happens when you jump in a tub? So Gemma. Think long term. I'm the back. Think long term, kid. Think long term, kid. So Gemma, walk us through what was our pitch that you liked?

What did you do? Where are we at here, pal? The pitch that I liked was just fully embrace being the wig lady. Just kind of lean into it, yes. Lean into it, embrace it, and that's exactly what I've done. Great. So walk us through it. Yeah, so I went on the work trip and probably nobody cared at all that I was wearing a wig.

You didn't jump in the tub, did you? Jake, she didn't jump in the tub. No, there's no tub. Was there a tub? She said that being said, we had a real connection right there. Uh-huh. Yeah, there were no tubs, no pools. Since I have embraced being a wiggly,

I did wear different different styles. And so obviously, I think people kind of knew that I was wearing wigs. But yeah, I've fully embraced it. I've got way more than I should now. Also, my husband has been incredibly supportive. I sent you guys some photos of my husband also wearing some wigs. Oh wow, so this is a household thing. Oh wow, he looks like he teaches philosophy at Brown. Yeah. Oh good Lord.

Hey Gemma, this whole thing's going a little sideways here pal, yeah? Jake. Yeah it be. Yeah. So, your husband is wearing, we'll post these obviously, but your husband, these are longer haired wigs and your husband has a beard. You know, he looks like he followed the Beatles. Yeah.

He does. He does. He does. And I've joked, he definitely looks better in some of those wigs than I do. Okay. So now we're in a wig house and I can tell Jake is, Jake's obviously more, I think Jake's more concerned and I know what he's gonna say.

He's gonna say, this is the world that I built with Gemma. And you know what, Jake, we love it. This is a Gareth world. And so Gareth, because we're a team, ring the bell, babe. Gemma, is it a bell ring? Yes, it is. And then Gemma, I got a question. You got any pets in that house? We do. Yeah, when I originally called in, we had four dogs. Now we have six. So yeah, definitely lots of pets in the house., you might put the wigs on those dogs and send it in some photos Hold on now, can you do something for us Gemma your Christmas card your holiday card?

Wigs on all the dogs. Yes You and your husband send a photo? Absolutely. First of all, so you've added two dogs and nine wigs. The sweeping in this house must be increasing 150%. How about this, Gareth? Just imagine what two years is going to be from now. 500 dogs, 82 wigs. She's going to be making wigs out of dog hair. She's like, it's fine.

Showing up to work parties as the Yeti. I went to her work trip, I just shaved a poodle, put it on my face. Then she jumps in the hot tub and comes out bare. And Gareth is gonna go, just follow your own lead if you want to be a bearded poodle lady. You need to be, you lean in, okay? Just lean in.

But I'm gonna tell you what, I'm about stats and I'm about results and this is a bell ring and so therefore This is wonderful and if you but will you do that put everybody the dogs and everyone in a photo and send it to us and maybe Do that as soon as you can and we can throw that at the end of this and it'll be on the Instagram and the website and all that Yeah, yeah, of course. Absolutely. Thanks guys. That means a lot. That means a lot. I would say follow up again, but well for God's sake Gemma website and all that? Yeah, yeah, of course, absolutely. Thanks guys.

That means a lot. That means a lot. I would say follow up again, but, well for God's sake, Gemma, what can we possibly follow up? Which is more wigs? I think it would be fair to have a quick wig update in maybe a few months. No.

My husband has joked that maybe he would call in asking for advice on how to get me to stop buying wigs. Right. So maybe we can hear from him. We're not going to take a call, Gemma. Be honest, it feels stagey. It feels stagey, exactly.

Don't produce, Gemma. You just keep wearing those wigs and shining on you crazy. She is producing dogs and wigs. She is. She is absolutely producing a lot of hair. Your husband's going to call in with a staged call wearing a full wig, and Gareth is going to go, let me pitch on that. Look, I think put one on the front too. Cousin it. Go baby.

The only way now is maybe turn the wig the other way and see what happens. Turn the other way. Turn the wig the other way and see what happens. Turn the other wig, turn the wig the other way. Well, Gemma, congratulations. Thank you for the call. Yeah, this is, well, then go on to you, Gemma, just to kind of take us out. Are you glad you called the show? How are you feeling? Absolutely. I'm so glad I called. Thank you guys so much. Thank you, Gemma. But Gemma, before we go, let's make this about us.

If you were going to give us a one out of 10, and I'm not talking about for your entertainment value because I think a lot of people and the listeners are confused and they think this is just for pure entertainment. It's not. How dare they? This is an advice show. Yeah. Was Gareth and my advice mostly Gareth, but we piggyback on each other?

We get there together. It's our process. We decided to say, even though clearly I didn't, I was screaming about take your wig off. Screaming. Really eating crow. But we decided to say, just be a wig family and put the wig on the husband and everybody. Has this, your original call,

has the question been answered in a satisfying way pretend This is customer service. You got one out of five one being the worst five being the best How would you greet? How would you grade your servers today at this? Benny Hanna Five out of five Great send that to corporate. Yeah. Yeah, we're gonna pass it up the chain. This is going to go all the way to Mr. Hannah. Or his beautiful wife, Betty. Thanks for the call, Gemma.

Thanks so much. Bye, guys. Appreciate it. Good luck with those dogs. We're Here to Help is hosted by Jake Johnson and Gareth Reynolds. If you'd like to be on the show, please email us your question at helpfulpod at gmail.com. And if you want to watch video episodes of We're Here to Help, you can go to our Patreon at patreon.com slash here to help pod to see our entire catalog. We're Here to Help is produced by Rabbit Grimm Productions, executive producers Rob Hollis, Jeff Porter and Natalie Hollis, associate producer Jesse Thurston, editing, mix and

master by Chris Fowler. Themed song by Oliver Raleigh, the cover artwork is by James Fostike, animations by Andrew Strelicki, and if you'd like to see Gareth do stand up on the road, go to garethrentolds.com. Remember all the advice given on We're Here to Help is for entertainment purposes only and all listeners should be adults and make their own decisions. All video episodes of season one are available now on Patreon and season two video episodes will be available every Monday starting January 20th. Go to patreon.com forward slash here to help pod.

Hi, I'm Rachel Billson and I'm Olivia Allen and we host.broadideas.com forward slash here to help pod. Hi, I'm Rachel Billson. And I'm Olivia Allen. And we host the podcast. Broad Ideas. Yes, that's now on HeadGum. On our show, we chat with people like Brittany Snow, Lucy Hale, Kristen Bell, Margaret Cho, Jake Johnson, and so much more.

And we talk about all the things you would talk about with your best friend. Like your periods. And mental illness. And the food you ate for lunch. Most importantly. Listen to Broad Ideas on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, YouTube, or wherever you listen to your podcasts.