We're Here to Help - 186: I Ask the Questions & I Love My Wife

Episode Date: July 7, 2025

Jake and Gareth help a caller annoy a team of persistent door-to-door salesmen. Then, it's the follow up to Ep 180 "Backdoor Boys," featuring the story of Gareth's first wax.See caller images here!Want to call in? Email your question to [e-mail]: https://patreon.com/heretohelppodMERCH: heretohelppod.comINSTAGRAM: @HereToHelpPodIf you’re enjoying the show, make sure to rate We’re Here to Help 5-Stars on Apple Podcasts.Advertise on We’re Here to Help via Gumball.fmSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

This is a HeadGum Podcast. Agent Nate Russo returns in Oracle III, Murder at the Grandview, the latest installment of the gripping Audible original series. When a reunion at an abandoned island hotel turns deadly, Russo must untangle accident from murder. But beware, something sinister lurks in the grand view's shadows. Joshua Jackson delivers a bone-chilling performance in the supernatural thriller that will keep you on the edge of your seat. Don't let your fears take hold of you as you dive into this addictive series. Love thrillers

with a paranormal twist? The entire Oracle trilogy is available on Audible. Listen now on Audible. Listen now on Audible. We're here to help. We're here to help. We're here to help. We're here to help. We're here to help. We're here to help. We're here to help. We're here to help.

We're here to help. And we are back! And we are back! On a Monday, you know, our last Wednesday episode, And we are back! On a Monday, you know, our last Wednesday episode, we did something different, Gareth. We sure did. We did a Steve Berg, Eric Edelstein fuck around for an hour. I don't know.

Look, people, we have a very crisp format to our show. This is a call and advice show. You and I give C to D advice. That's exactly right. We cajole people to take it. Then we follow up and we probably have a 54% hit rate. Well, we're currently getting stats on that. People are sending it in.

We are gonna actually, I know you don't check the emails, but a lot of people have written in, we are starting to get numbers. Okay, I can't wait. And there's gonna be an intro where we read it out, we're gonna, it's gonna be a whole thing. Okay, great. That was a huge departure because we thought,

well, it's a holiday week, it's kind of a weird week for podcasting, so we thought why not just do a kind of muck around with Berg who came in 12 minutes early to the Zoom. Everybody will have heard it by now. And Eric Edelstein, who once again just flame throws any chat he's involved in with his takes that are so hot, they could be a Hot Take Festival winner.

I agree. But it was a wild event. Yeah, so do me a favor to the people listening just for the fun of the show and the choose your own adventure aspect of podcasting in 2025. Comment wherever you watch it. If you like that, you want more of that or you don't.

And it's fine. It's no one's personal, but it's cause that or you don't and it's fine. Because then you could also do the random like Friday. I love hanging out with you and those guys on a zoom or you and me and anybody else. It's also a fun thing to do every once in a while. It's not what our show is. Well, it's also because our show is not like a sit down, chit chat podcast. It agrees. There's a lot we could talk about.

We're not like we're not like low on stuff we can gab about So but here's the question Gareth that I have to the audience sure would people rather the occasional re-release Mm-hmm, or would people rather the occasional fireside chat or recap it and muck around The idea of it was we were gonna talk a little bit about the world of the show, where

we're at, other stories, have the occasional guest come in and just clown around with us just for the fun of it. So comment and like always, it doesn't matter if it's negative. We want your real opinions. And don't forget to share the show. Good Lord. Oh, I've got something really fast about sharing the show that I wanted to read. And I'm glad you brought that thing in.

But first, we're doing a little something differently. And please remind me about sharing the show thing because it's fun. But in terms of the world building and the show getting bigger, we're actually doing something that is not something we had planned. It's kind of unique to Gareth and I too

and we're excited about it. Well, you alluded to the fact that you're the email checker. Yes. And we've really had a number of people get involved in the show. From Caitlin, starting with social media. Email. Yeah, to a woman named Tina who's helping us right now

with also new social, it's like, people jump in and help. So you got an email from a teenager in New Zealand named Tom, who is a day one listener, ride or die of the show. Had the episode deal, everything, knows his stuff. And he pitched us on an internship. And we were like 16. But very specific.

And it was, can I come out for a month? I have my own place to stay. And I just wanna learn the ins and outs of the business and I wanna know all facets of it. So we kind of followed up and made sure his parents had okayed this and this was not some sort of catfishing. And Tom was real, Tom's parents were super into it, wanted to give him a break.

This is from school. He got a month off basically. But there was a version of, I'm not gonna get into the weeds of it, but there was educational things involved. He wasn't drinking beer out here and gambling on horses. Not that we know. Yeah, but so let's bring on.

So we have Tom. The first. The New Zealand Thunder. We're here to help. Yeah, but so let's let's bring on so we have Tom the first The new zealand thunder here to help the new zealand thunder the first intern Tom welcome to the show Hello. Hello. How are we good brother? How are you? I'm doing good. I'm doing good. Just happy to be on the show. Happy to be the intern. How have you been enjoying your internship on We're Here to Help? I've been loving it. One of my first trips overseas, first time to America, and I've

been loving it here. I've got a place to stay. But you're pretty much, you're at the end of your internship with us for now, Tom. We're gonna keep using you for certain things you've been over here. I will do it online with him, yeah. Yeah, yeah, of course. But you've really been helping, you've been working a lot, learning a lot,

and everyone has very positive things to say about you. Is it strange that the initial chapter is kind of coming to an end because you're going back to New Zealand, back to school strange that the initial chapter is kind of coming to an end because you're going back to New Zealand back to school now and you're gonna kind of... Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, it feels it feels weird you know like one day I was helping on a podcast with Jake Johnson and now I'm going back to do like... Also Gareth Reynolds. He knows the bit, he knows the show. He's our Heather, baby, he's our Heather.

Well, you've been awesome, dude. Everyone has great things to say about you. We wish you luck going back to school. We're gonna miss you like crazy. But you're also not done with us, obviously, as we've all talked about, we're gonna keep emailing and figure stuff out, Tom. You're a hard worker, you got a bright future ahead of you.

Now, I'm just gonna include you in this opening now, Tom. I want your opinion too. But we got an email about the show spreading that I thought was very funny. Okay. From a guy named Kyle Long. Okay. Not the bears Kyle Long.

Okay. That's cool. It's not cool. First of all it's not him and second of all it wouldn't be cool if it was. Third of all I didn't read his name Kyle Long until right this second. Okay. Subject strategy planning. Oh. And Tom feel free to jump in whenever you feel like it. Of course, of course, of course. Just wanted to say love you guys, just wanted to say love you guys show and everything you guys do. I'm a mailman with a short-term memory loss issue, so I re-listen to your podcast episodes all the time. This is an ideal listener for a podcast. Like it's the first time I'm hearing that.

This is exactly what we need. Every download counts. Then he wrote, LOL. I will say you don't need to increase your following on the show. You just need a good, like, five or six people with memory issues, and you'll have plays and views

for the rest of the show's life. Thanks again for making my job more enjoyable. I slap in headphones and listen to you guys for a few hours every day. If you're ever in Cleveland, Ohio, and have mail-related questions in your, I'm your guy. P.S. I have two dogs. P.S. I have two dogs.

P.S. I have two cats and a dog and really want another dog. If you could convince my girlfriend that we could get another dog, that would be great. And I wrote, this genuinely brought a huge smile to my face, thanks for writing it. Can I read it to Gareth during show? He wrote, hell yeah, brother.

I'm sure after a few listens, I'll forget it's from me. Hello, hello. Appreciate you guys. Enjoy your day. Kyle, you're the best. That's so funny. That's so sad, but cool. But just the best.

That's our sweet. We're looking for from now on. We've asked you guys to share. We have seen you have been, we appreciate it. But let's share to people with short term memory. We can win that demo. All the lessons. All the lessons, Tom.

All the lessons. Well, thank you, Kyle. And thank you, Tom, for all your hard work. Yeah, good luck back at it. Safe trip back and enjoy yourself. You'll be missed. You'll be missed. Anyways, Jake. Thank you.

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Don't get angry. Get Orchard. Please drink responsibly. This episode of We're Here to Help is brought to you by Squarespace. We love Squarespace. We just solved a problem yesterday with Squarespace. We use it all the time on the show. You've heard it over and over again. No product is more included in the We're Here to Help problem-solving universe than Squarespace because it makes you look legit. I use it for my own website.

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Like I've said, like we say, we use it all the time on the show for good reason So go to Squarespace.com slash Gil sent me for a free trial and when you're ready to launch Use offer code Gil sent me to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain Hello, how you doing? Good. Can we get your name please? My name is John. Hey, Don. And Don, welcome to the show. John with a J. That's what I was saying, yeah. Goodbye, John. Where are you calling from, pal? I'm calling from the Kansas City area. Kansas City. You a Chiefs fan? I am, yeah. I am now. I grew up in DC, lived in Chicago in Southern California, but been here for 10 years. You're moving around, John. So John, if you had a memoir about your life, what would it be called? It would be called Eventually.

Ooh, I like that. John, Eventually lived everywhere. Now you're in Kansas City. What can we do for you today? So I live in the suburbs and it's summer. So we've got door to door salespeople coming around, you know, every once in a while. But I work from home and don't really want to get bothered by every person that wants to sell me a new roof

or pest control or whatever, right? So we've got a do not or a no soliciting sign out and it works kind of half the time. Other half the time, you know, someone comes to the door like, hey, I'm working in the neighborhood. Do you have some loose shingles and say, not interested. Pay attention to those soliciting signs. See you later. It's all done this summer though, we've got these

solar panel guys that are coming through and they are just Next level in terms of how aggressive they are So they look like the first guy came and he rang the doorbell and ignored it and he knocked on the door And I ignored it and he starts the doorbell and ignored it and he knocked on the door and I ignored it. And he starts knocking on the window. What? Wow, that's not OK. What the hell does guy one? Right. So I go down like, OK, he must really need something.

What's going on? He's got some like company shirt on. And he's like, hey, you know, have you gotten your new smart meter installed? I was like, oh, well, maybe he's from the power company So like yeah, like are you with the electric company goes? Well, I wanted to tell you about this new program like hold on Are you from the electric company like every time I ask a question he starts in on a spiel like alright I'm closing the door now like Well, I mean right like yeah, so

He he's like well, yeah, I'm trying, like, we've got these things. I'm like, well, if you're not going to give me a straight answer, I'm not going to hear you out. I kept interrupting him and all, you know, well, if I told you I was trying to sell you something, you would have said no. And well, now I've said no, and you've wasted my time and you've wasted your time with, oh, I don't care. Like, this is kind of fun. Like I'm annoyed, close the door, try to look up the company.

They don't seem to actually exist. So I don't know what this guy's trying to do. And like two weeks later, another guy in the same shirt shows up and he knocks on the door, he rings the doorbell. He knocks again. So I go down like, look, your buddy came before. I'm not interested. Pay attention. No soliciting before. I'm not interested. Pay attention.

No soliciting signs. Get out of here. So I'm just trying to do my job. Like I, they tell me to knock on every door no matter what. So my question is these guys are like college kids that are just doing their summer job, right? Somebody's telling them, ignore this. They're just doing what they're told, but I want them to stop or like, what could I do?

That would be just a little bit weird, a little bit uncomfortable for them to make the situation like a little bit as annoying for them as it is for me. They're not going to stop. If I tell them to stop, there's no one that's going to tell them to stop. If I complain. So what can I do to make the situation just as annoying for them or uncomfortable for them as it is annoying for me? Hey John, first I want to start by complimenting you. You clearly listened to the show.

You drove past, you did a full set. Ew, Gareth. I was praying you didn't see that what was that? It's all got spilly. Okay, so I had to holy no animal Drink your John I'm sorry John Garrett just took a sip of the mug called garris mug. What is going on with you? You are yeah, go is out of control with you. You are. Yeah, go is out of control.

It was a gift. Then you need to face it to the kid. No. OK. You lick. Jarrett's job, John. What Jake was about to say was you had a very clean and it was great. Can you explain that weird look? Actually, and you're a rabbit. Can you guys edit?

Oh, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes. OK, so first of all, eww, yuck, Gareth. Stop. Stop. Sorry, I'm just waking up, that was so gross. It was not okay. I know, but you know that I'm right here. I know it wasn't okay.

Okay, moving on. I thought- That's all I needed to hear. I needed, I was trying to move out of frame so you wouldn't see it. I was probably about to, which didn't help anything. What happened was the lid got stuck. Did you see me leave before we started recording? I was trying to get the lid.

Okay. So the lid got stuck for some reason. And then when I got it off, it had gotten real drippy. So then I noticed that it had gotten drippy. So then I thought, well, while you're talking to John, this is a perfect time to get a rim lick. Did you just do a weird cat lick? So I did a rim job. He did a cat rim job.

I did a cat rim job and it didn't come across great and I'm sure this will be a clip. That would be my guess is that people will see this because it's very visual and it's disturbing. It's definitely a clip. So like the road. You know what, Natalie? It's a clip. Will you put his beatboxing under that? We're coming out. So right the road. You know what, Natalie? It's disgusting. It's a cliff, Natalie. Will you put his beatboxing under that?

Look, I think we all trust Matt a little bit less after what we look for. Yeah, but back to John. John. John, I'm sorry because Jake was really giving you a nice compliment and I thought, I'll use that. Yeah, but that was a really great setup and it was very clean and you finished it with a question so I appreciate you.

You definitely called the right place. Absolutely. Mike, can I ask a question to you, Jon? How much time do you have to put into this? Lick. Lick. Sorry. Keep going.

You try to drive through it while I do it, you you did to me. I gave it a very fair spotlight. Fair. I owned what I did. Fair. It's not right. Yeah. I know. What you're doing is even better than what I did. I mean, I fully went like ice cream in public sand. It was bad.

How much time do you have to devote to this? How much resources? Not too much. He works at home. Yeah, but I mean we can hit hard. He can hit hard. Go ahead John. I work from home, but I work for myself. But I'm also the guy that made the pigly and moscite. So like if I get off on a tangent. Whoa John, you're the guy who made the pigly and moscite?

Did you hear what happened John? No John, this guy made a whole website honoring of of yeah, and Jake tried to catfish me one night Well, wait, no, I didn't John You thought I was catfishing you John tell me John tell the story. This is so funny So I'm listening to the podcast while mowing the lawn, however many weeks ago, and you guys do the thing of Pigly and Moe died, right? The announcement of that.

They did die, right? So one of my bad habits, hobbies is buying website domains. And occasionally I'll make a website. That's what I do for a living. I do digital marketing stuff. Cool. I was like, wouldn't it be funny if Piggly and Moe had an immemorial website. So kids are watching their screens on a Saturday, and I'm trying to cool off from mowing the

lawn, and so buy the domain and make a quick website. Hey, John, what's the name of the website so people listening can check it out? Yeah, I don't think I've seen the actual site. Higleyandmo.com. Oh, that's insane. Oh yeah, why, you think it was taken, Garrett? I mean everything's taken. Yeah, I think Higleyandmo was available.

I was just listening to the hot dog lady episode last night and Off on like this is so whatever like Ashley the hot dog lady is still available. So that's the kind of thing I've got some time to burn on my head a boy John, you know, so I've got my first pitch for you, John All right. Actually, I got two pitches. I got a few two One we could home alone it. Remember the movie Home Alone? Keith can change you filthy animal. Of course. Where? Oh, you're, oh, this is very, oh. What? Jump in. It's very, no, I love it. I love where you're at. Yes. So I'm thinking we could- I like how you're like, John has a job. I love where you're at. Yes. I'm thinking we could-

I like how you're like, John has a job. He can't, we're gonna Home Alone. I didn't realize John was the guy who created the Pigly and Bo website. There's time to burn. Yeah, we got some time. So John, do you remember in the movie Home Alone? I know you've seen it.

When little sweet Kevin is home by himself and you got Pesci and Stern trying to break in and little Kevin decides to record sounds from a movie and scare the pizza guy away. And it's dropping on the door and get the hell out of here before I like shoot you in your keister. Yeah. I'm going to pump you so full of lead. Keep the change on the animal.

I'm gonna give you to the count of 10 to get your no good yellow belly off of my porch. One, two, ten. Yes. So we can create an audio recording that, and look, as one of the creators of Pigly and Moe which we got busted on I'm not positive how this technology works John that's on you you're the web designer we're just here to pitch an idea that maybe you could do

do you have a ring or something like that that maybe you could talk through it or even just like a speaker. So is there a world, if this idea works and you like it, do you have the technology to pull this off? Yeah, I was even thinking like, I'd be up for going down and answering the door and I can like have the recording ready. And like, I was thinking if it's like a recording

I have on my phone, pretend to be on my phone, accidentally left on speakerphone and it's like a recording I have on my phone pretend to be on my phone accidentally left on speakerphone and it's like Something ridiculous. Yes recorded of that makes like an embarrassing voicemail from a doctor or Like I'm getting fired right then and there. Yes, or what I would like to do is so what I do when I get calls from spam is I always answer And I try to get them on the line. I'll do it with my kids in the car on speaker And i'll do a whole routine with these people the best a lot of it has to do Jesus and i'm preaching a little bit to them and i'm trying to bring the lord back to them a little bit

And you'll be surprised in the middle of it, they'll be like, so are you interested in selling your house? And I'll be like, I'm interested in the Lord. And I'm interested in the Lord coming right through the phone to you, Jack. And I go, because I'll tell you what, I got, I live on a goddamn dirt floor. I got fire as my light. As they're looking at a 360 view of your house and then all of a sudden they wait through gorillas in the yard this guy they will go all right well thanks so much and never stop

until they hang up so what you could do is we could create a preacher character john and rather than doing it over voicemail you could be. Because what a salesman hates is when they're being sold. So sell the salesman. That's kind of- The other thing I thought- Go ahead, John. Was, so my parents moved out here from out of state a number of years ago and they lived with us for a bit.

And it's a whole thing, but when they tried to change their address, they changed my address too. And my dad and my information got like, meshed up with these data miners. So I get calls for him as 75 year old guy, for like reverse mortgages and insurance and stuff like that. And they wouldn't stop. So I just started telling them that my dad had died. Like, I can't believe you would call and grieving family just after they died, trying to sell my dead dad and homeowner's insurance or whatever. Yeah. Right?

Like, do I take it in that direction? Hey, John. Yeah. Speaking of Home Alone, you remember another great classic from that era? A little movie called Uncle Buck. What does that both have in common? What? What are you talking about?

Wait, you said you never saw Uncle Buck? I never saw Uncle Buck. First piece of homework, you gotta watch Uncle Buck. Wonderful John Candy movie. John Candy and Macaulay Culkin. Of course. Well, that's where I'm going with. There's a moment when little Macaulay is, Uncle Buck is the uncle who comes in from the city

to the suburbs to watch the kids for a weekend. And Macaulay rapid fire asks questions to Uncle Buck. And Uncle Buck just asks, here's what I'm thinking. When they come to the door, you bring your phone on voice notes and you rapid fire take over the thing and ask questions. And we use it for the podcast. I think a lot of what we're pitching,

we use for the podcast. Yeah, but literally we get, they go to the door and you go like, here we go. And you say beforehand, this is John from Kansas city. This is door number four, starting time to 17. You answer it. They go like, hi, I'm here. And you go like this.

I'm asking the questions. Number one, what's your favorite color? And you were orthotics. Do you, yeah. Do we get you enough questions until you have him in your car and we will come up with questions and John, what we can do as a community too is We could have the patreon people write questions, too I love it

Do we even want to get you a hat that says press on the side of it like you're? Representing some sort of old-timey publication or something Or a shirt that says, I asked the questions. Yeah, something like, just, I think. I think a hat could work. Okay, cause it's easier. Like this is what I'm looking for, cause I am not a think on my feet creative person. So I need something that I can like walk down armed with.

Yeah. And I might be just coming off a work call. So I can throw on a hat. A hat, and then you could also have a work call so I can throw on a hat You could also have a sheet of paper with the questions I think you could get one of those little notebooks that are kind of the little flippy notebooks that the reporters used to have a Pretend to be jotting down that's where you can have your question. Yeah, you use that and then in your pocket in like a chest pocket You're gonna put your phone. I love the for us. John, what do you think? Let's hear from you a little bit.

I love that idea. I love the rapid fire questions, right? Like I've gotta be able to do this right away when they show up. Honestly, I was sitting here hoping that like, it was a couple weeks ago that the last came and they came a couple weeks before that. I was like, wouldn't it be awesome

if they showed up while I was on the call? I was thinking one of the things we could do is call the company and prank them but I think this is a better move. This is better. Well and I haven't been able to find the company like that was my first call. I'll just send a complaint but like it seems like they're not just like trying to sell stuff that there's something shady going on because like I guarantee they don't seem to exist on the internet. Super weird. I love the idea of rapid fire questions. Right.

Like that's what I need is like a list like you're putting him in your car when you knock on doors, anyone ever get to naked. All right. Let's do this really fast. John, let's do this really fast. Tell me how many questions you think you know these people. How many questions do you think you could get? Before they leave and you just you got to keep fired and then at a certain point you just close the door on them. Oh, I mean i'm willing to stand there and do it until they leave I now like you I want them to.

I want them to be the ones to walk away. Okay I know I could do like three or four and then they'd start trying to interrupt me No, they care not for a second and then just plow right like just Railroad again. Yeah with another five or six. I bet I could get through Ten or fifteen. I think let's make a goal. Let's make a contest We're trying to get to 20 questions. I think if you play it right, if you're pretending to sort of absorb a little bit of what they say and just always fire back with the weirdest question, I think you'll be able to get there. I like the idea too.

We don't need to be everything, but remember when Mike Myers had coffee talk, Jake? Yes. Since we're doing an Inspire, it could be questions like that. Like the peanut is neither a pea nor a nut. What do you think of that? It could be like stuff along those lines. Like how come they sell hot dogs in packs of 10, but buns in eight?

That weird? And that's what Patreon can help us with. Like that sort of, you know. So you know what we could actually do is, why don't we come up with some questions right now? In case they come. It would be really funny to not only have like a base 10, but just keep changing it.

Because this could be a really fun reoccurring segment, Jon. What could be really fun is if you get one and you send it, and we just put it on with just at the end of an episode. We just, whenever they come for the next year, John's Corner, we just go like, hey, producer Sherlock here, here's another segment from John's Corner. Listen to the first one episode ever. So if somebody finds us real late and they don't go back, they just go like, it doesn't make any sense. What's great about this too is that obviously we love it, but you're going to be excited when you hear a knock. You're going to be like, I got to get my press kit.

Does that mean I need to take down the no soliciting sign? Yes. I mean, I need to let them come to the door. You want solicitors. Yeah. I mean, dare I say we put a sign up that says, please solicit. How about this? How about a sign that says, please? John, please solicit. I have some questions. Please solicit. I have questions. That is, that might go ahead. At that point, if we want them to engage and want them to think that I'm, you know, engaging with them, does the I ask the questions hat lead them on a bit too much that I'm just

trying to mess with them? You're right. You're right. Yeah. I do kind of like the idea of I ask the questions, how that'd be a good one, like just to have it ready with for my kids. We're in a new zone now because we wanted to get rid of it and now we just want to live in it with fun. Yeah, no, but we want to live in it in a way in order to get rid of it. So I don't want that anymore.

So John, we're wrapping this up with you and then pick your favorite questions and maybe every time change them Yeah, and just obviously send as you go. Thank you for creating the website Pigly and moe comm and then just honestly as you know, you're a listener just every time it happens Send us a clip if you want to do a little voice note intro you want to do a producer Sherlock here just say Call her John here, and you want to recap it a little bit before that'd be helpful, too Awesome, I'm gonna go down and take off the no sluicing sign right now. That'll play we're back, baby So glad we could help with your problem. Glad we solved your problem. Thanks guys.

Bye bud. And we are brought to you by Kachava. So I am a fan of Kachava. I drink it a lot. It's got 25 grams of 100% plant-based protein. It's got chocolate, vanilla, chai, matcha, coconut, acai. I like the chocolate. I also like the vanilla.

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I used to add fruit to my smoothies. I don't do that anymore because Kachava is that good. So fuel your daily adventures with Kachava. Go to Kachava.com and use code here to help for 15% off your next order. That's kachava, K-A-C-H-A-V-A.com code here to help for 15% off. Producer Sherlock here. This next call is a follow up to episode 180, Back Door Boys. The guys asked Morgan, who runs our Patreon, to join this call so you'll hear her as well. Hello! to join this call so you'll hear her as well. This is a, this is Nick from Utah.

Hello. Hello. Hey, it's Morgan. You don't know me. Who do we got here? This is Nick from Utah. Nick. Hey Nick. Nick's back.

We know who Nick is. Nick is the guy who Nick is. Nick is the guy who has a problem where he gets in steam rooms and when he gets up there's a streak behind him. And so what we recommended was he gets a Brazilian butt wax to see if it helps the problem. Is that correct Nick? Am I dead on? Yeah, dead on.

One thing we've got to say really fast before we start, Nick, is your call got us the most emails we've gotten in a while about a call. Natalie, will you read the last email I sent over last night? Yeah, yeah, I will. me so we just got it for anybody who related to Nick's problem or Nick Here was the main response from the audience. Yeah, so this is an email I'm gonna read but they also came through as Spotify comments other emails lots of the same advice Yeah, I did read some of the comments. Yeah The subject line is shouting at the radio Love you guys and Nat Attack.

I had called to say this, but I couldn't find the number. For the caller who has shit stains on their sauna towel, I used to have very similar gastro issues, and both my wife and I were literally yelling out loud, go to a freaking gastroenterologist. I know a lot of dudes don't like doctors and it's inconvenience and all the excuses, just go. I'm 34 and dealt with messed up guts for years

and it just kept getting worse and then after two appointments and one colonoscopy, I was given a medication that resolved all my issues in weeks, done, and I've never looked back. That's not fun advice. Medical problems deserve medical solutions. Enjoy your butt waxing. I enjoy you.

All right, all right. So Nick, we just wanna say to everybody out there who's relating, we agree with that email. That's an option. But the option we took was something else. Well, you called a different show. Yeah. So we did some butt waxing.

So Nick, where are we at here, Big Daddy? How are we doing? Yeah. Well, I read all the comments and I actually had a lot of people reach out to me as well about that. So it's noted, but you know, I call, you know, Dr. Gareth and Dr. J for my advice. You know what I'm saying? Because you get it, dude. You're not a freaking idiot. Yeah. Because you know being a doctor is just a state of mind. We know what we're doing I'm not wasting my time. We're not gonna confine into societal norms and have good, you know bowel movements We're gonna talk to a podcast and wax our buttholes. I'm not wasting my time going to med school when I know these answers

Yeah, exactly Exactly Nick. So you did you get the butt waxing? I did get the butt waxing. And let me just say it's got to be up there for one of the craziest experiences of my life. Please take your time. Can I well, first, can I ask, did Gareth get his as well? Or am I what I left out to dry? I don't know. Gareth, Did you get a butt waxing? Natalie how do we want to handle this? Yeah, I want I have reactions from both of you guys

I want to play yours first Gareth and then so the answer is Yes, Jake you did. Yes But how much should I say, Natalie? I said, don't tell me anything until we're on the show. How much should I say, Natalie? Because- It might be funnier to listen to you and then- But, Nance, here's what we need to do, because this is an exciting one for us.

Don't be quiet. Just jump in. Okay? You're part of this. Okay. Can I also say, I mean, okay, watch Gareth first, and then I'll give you some context before I show you mine. Okay. Okay. You're part of this. Can I also say, I mean, okay, watch Garrett's first and then I'll give you some context before I show you mine. Okay.

So Garrett's is just audio. We have a little quick video from Nick, but we're only going to use the audio on the pod because we're going to respect your privacy with your face. But you know, it's good. This is Garrett getting waxed? This is me probably before. It's a small section. No, no, no.

Oh my God. You had like 10 minutes. Well, let me say, Jake, what happened was I thought we were going to record. I was going to record some with Dave Holmes. Yes. And I was sitting there and we'd had a miscommunication, so he wasn't showing up. And Natalie was like, well, go get your waxing. And I was like, am I doing this?

I was like what's going on with you know? That's when we started texting and I was already basically on my way So I went from sitting here about to record my literally 30 minutes later Doing this all right go ahead Natalie. Oh boy. I can already tell this is gonna be wild tell this is gonna be wild. This podcast is about two years now. So this is me in the room. Say the waxing faces. Oh my god. Is it bleeding? Okay. Oh, that was nuts. Oh my lord. It would have been so much better if we did it together. I agree, Nick. Ah, I didn't know there was more there.

Now, now this is really this is more than I expected. I'll be honest. So, OK, let me say this. What happened was this. I I said I was in for the butt, right? And I said, and when you and I talked, like, I was trying to just be, I was like, well, what will be best for the show is what I started to think. But the place I was going only did the back.

Right. OK. So I thought. And when I went in and I said, you don't do the front, too, do you? She said, we do it all. And I said, let's go. said you don't do the front to do you she said we do it all And I said let's go you dad is the front and oh my god Nick. You just went back Yeah, I only get back is ten times more painful wait hold on right so now we're gonna Hold on Natalie. I have to ask what? I have to ask questions so What? I have to ask questions. So you went in Gareth and Nick, you're gonna get grilled too, but we want you part of this

as well. But my 20 year friend got a fucking Brazilian. So what happened? You go there, you take off your underpants, and they wax your backside and your dick and balls. Dude, it's, it is, let me say this. I'll never do it again. There is, this will never happen.

There were, there were. Wait, did you say that makes one of us? Yes, he did. I'm having a different, it sounds like I've had a different experience. Gareth, hold on, I've had a different experience. Well, I- Gareth, hold on. We have to go to Nick. Now, Nick, should we listen to yours and hear your take and then-

Yeah, let's listen to him. Can you both kind of get into it? Yeah. Yeah. Can I set the stage first of saying that I'm not a comedian or not an actor and so I felt incredibly uncomfortable pulling out my phone in this situation. Yeah. So you'll be able to see on my face how awkward I was. It's a short video too.

Again, I felt very uncomfortable and the girl was looking at me like, why the hell are you recording this? So I stopped pretty quickly. You'll see his face, but it's fine. We'll just play the audio on the pod. Okay. Let's hear. Let's see. Are you ready? Yeah.

Three, two, one. One Yeah. Three, two, one. One more. Three, two, one. Okay. Okay. Other side. Okay, you ready? Okay, yours didn't seem so bad, Nick. But the thing is this, I went in there and I was like, what I'm not gonna do is 40 year old vert, like I'm not gonna go over the top.

I was like, I wanted to, the front hurts so much. Well hold on G-man, I assumed from that, from the follow up from people writing, so I don't know if we needed two guys getting their butt wax, that's why I pushed you so hard for the front. But Nick, walk us through what happened with the butt wax Well, first of all, let me just set the stage when you're filling out the forms There's a part in it where it says that you consent to not touch yourself while getting this done Oh cuz some people do it for perversion That's what I was seeing. So I'm like, man, like, I feel like this girl

is probably gonna assume I'm a pervert. Of course. And so the whole time I go in and I'm just like, by the way, I love my wife and I have a very happy family and I'm a very normal person. By the way, weirdest thing you could have said to start. I think it's fine to go in there for that and just keep saying how much you love your wife

I needed her to know that I that I wasn't a pervert and then Exactly what a pervert would say hurt no perverts always tell people they're not perverts you find hey Will you wax my bottle and I'm a pervert would say hurt. No perverts always tell people they're not perverts you find Hey, will you wax my bottle and I'm a pervert? Like this is my wife Stephanie. She's the best. I love my boys They have soccer branches wax my buttock as I touch my sack and you go like you're a pervert Just simply say you never had to fill out that form. I haven't either The males Just simply say, never had to fill out that form. I haven't either. I didn't have to fill that one out. The males and females have different lives. I think it's Nick.

Yeah, that's what I was saying. It must have been a male only form because it was like the second page of like, you agree not to touch yourself or the person. If they ever feel uncomfortable, they can kick you out. And so I'm like, okay, what am I signing up for? I'm not trying to tell them I you know Pervert or anything like that. So, you know this reminds me of that Remember the Eddie Murphy skit where he wore white face and the whole world was different when he was white the best There is the same reality for men and women like if a woman goes to waxing if a guy goes it goes

Fuck send us piece of paper that if you touch your fucking dick you're out of here We can kick you out whatever Just go like yeah, just get an actual Hacksane that's a catch the best the best So Nick you go in there you fill out the 15 pages of consent. You're not gonna creep this poor woman out You're not gonna jack off. You're just gonna get your butt waxed and she told me she's like, you know Take going to jack off, you're just going to get your butt waxed. And she told me, she's like, you know, take off your pants as I was expected. And then I, and so I clearly said, may I take off my pants now?

So that she knew I was, you know, this was all a consensual transaction. Nick, Nick, Nick, Nick. I was going a little over the top. Nick, and in that, in doing that, while your heart was in the right place, it is, it seems a lot stranger to me to be like, I love my wife.

May I take my pants off? I have kids. I am sorry for my half erection. Okay, you were adding in that part. I was not. I agree. You were a quarter. So Nick, you said, may I take my pants off?

Yeah. And then, and then she just said, yes, you may take, you know, took them off and then she's like sit down on the table and you know, I had thought how many people have sat on this table. And then for a second, I was like, well, hopefully the source of this issue doesn't happen right now sitting on this white table. You know what I mean? The source was Morgan Revens, every time he sits down, he leaves stains.

The fucking guy goes to the bathroom eight times a day, though. I've thought about Nick a lot. You have? In recent, in the incense, yeah. Fam. Thinking about you, Nick. I think a lot of us have, Nick. Or what happens when they rip it out.

Is it, are we dealing with a whole new set of like... Do you think it's gonna be like a fire hose? It's like striking oil. Yeah. Yeah, just, we're curious? It's like striking oil. Yeah. Yeah, just, well, Gareth, there's no wax inside of you. You can see, you'd be like, do they pour it? Morgan, he has shit stains from sitting on a towel. He's not jamming it up his ass.

I agree with Gareth, actually. Okay. All right, so back to Nick. So, Nick, you said, may I take my pants off? She said, obviously, I just did that you sat down You got a little scared of leaving a stain Then what happened big daddy? Then I was expecting to be asked, you know roll over on your stomach. I would think so that's that's what I would think so

But then she said but then she said roll on your back and pull your knees to your chest She fucking diapered you humiliating way to do it. So you had to put your legs up like a baby getting a diaper change. Exactly. I would prefer to lay on my stomach for that. I don't want to do the day. By the way, your dick and balls just go right into your body. Nick, you are totally not on your back. You have no genitalia.

Your legs are spread. You're afraid of dirty in the sheets. You don't want to be a pervert, so you keep over-perving out saying things like, can I spread my legs now? Then what happens? This isn't a turn on. Well, and for a split second, I was like,

how have all my decisions in life led to this point? But then I immediately thought, anything for the pod. And if I'm really trying to get, you know, to the source of this problem, which, you know, yeah, doctor here, doctor who, you know what I mean? It's really, I'm trying to get to the source of the problem and that's whatever Gareth and Jake suggested. So you get it. Yeah. Okay. So, so yeah.

Then the the hot liquid gets poured on the the butt. Is this correct? Not very hot. What kind of was it? Was it a wax strip? Was it hard wax or sugar? There's sugar. Why did they put sugar there?

The sugar was sugar. OK, a little bit of sugar for the person to have a little bit of sweetness before they wax you out? They put baby powder on you and then to dry up the area and help with any stains that might be there genuinely. Oh really? Yeah, like to stand it, like it gets rid of moisture, which would also, you know, that's what's going on behind him. So.

Okay, so they baby powder, did they baby powder your butt like a little baby boy? I don't remember being baby powdered, maybe they did for all I know. I don't know what the hell went on down there. Is it liquefied sugar or they just pour sugar on your ass? They poured something, it was definitely poured.

It was like they put something and then they rubbed it around with a little stick and then just ripped it off. Oh, that's hard wax. Okay, that's one of the good ones to get, nice. Okay, so. That one is hard wax. and then they rubbed it around with a little stick and then just ripped it off. Oh, that's hard wax. Okay, that's one of the good ones to get. Nice. That one is hard wax.

Okay, I wasn't sure. So they, and what are you thinking when you got hot wax going all around that hairy butt of yours, Dick? You know, the application of the wax wasn't the worst feeling in the world, but then obviously the tearing off. I know, but did you say when the hot wax came in, did you go like, I don't like this? No, I just I was like, by the way, my wife is the best.

And I'm going to go home to my wife. I went to jail. By the way, my wife is the best. And they have your butt is an incredible. Let me just for this hot wax on your butt. I love my life. I'm a big fan. Get it, so big.

I think I was doing good at being, you know, cautious to make sure she knew that I wasn't a pervert. You did great, yeah. You sure did great. I'm not a pervert. The craziest part about it, the craziest part about it was she had done probably like four strips.

And then she goes, by the way, like I thought I was done. And then she goes, oh, by the way, there's still hair there. Did you want me to get it all? And I was like, what do you mean, do you want me to get it? Yeah, that's why I'm here.

Leave some. And so that like doubled the problem. I mean, she doubled up on all she went back He went back over it again. Yeah to get all the hairs So and so now for I mean, obviously this has become its own event And the event is I got a lot of questions for garris too But this is your whole this was originally about a solving a problem and before we got scolded by our audience for being This was originally about solving a problem. And before we got scolded by our audience for being buffoons and having you go to a

doctor, I really believed it was the right pitch. So I still believe it is. So, so Nick, you got a clean, you got a clean butt, my man. No hair back there. Yeah. Oh yeah. Yep. And let me say I've, I couldn't even recognize my own butt.

It was, it was quite the transformation Okay, and How's it going? You know, it's only been a week and a half since so we've only done like two or three sauna sessions But you you guys knocked it out of the park. I mean shit Yeah, so far so good. I don't want to jump to conclusion. I know it's you know Fixed but it's it's definitely helped. So it was it was a

sticking around issue That's what I'm thinking. Yeah, but then reading all the comments, no podcast. Maybe you realize that I probably do have a problem. Hold on, hold on, hold on. I don't know, Nick. I don't know. If we solve the goddamn probe, you want to know why all these people are saying go to a doctor because they've been conditioned by society. Okay, easy RFK. Slow down. I feel. Guess what? They don't make money off you if you just wax that butt. They make money off you with all the medicines they're giving you.

I have nine different pills. There's nothing more holistic than getting your butt hole out. I can't believe Nick is buying one of your snicks. Like, doctors are fake. Nick, let me ask you a question. When you take your 900 dumps in a day and you sit down on that white towel in the steamroom, you leaving a mess behind? No. The towel is honestly probably cleaner than before I sat on it.

Wrong. So. 100% not accurate. Cleaner than before I sat on it wrong. So But it doesn't have a streak we're happy with the problem is solved I would say just to be safe Why what's he gonna say doctor? Is he gonna go I used to have a problem. No, I don't can I have a medicine? I don't know. I probably just tell my shit a lot. So Like this, okay. Why are you here? You know because everybody told me I should see a doctor and they go medication Section exactly told me I need to go see a doctor neck. I am thrilled Thrilled that I am too. Are you going to repeat the process?

Because you might be a guy that now just has to wax? Well, I was going to say it's actually that is that is real. I think you two opened up Pandora's box and inside of it was my lady opened up Pandora's box. Well, you said I love my wife. Yeah. Well, I said yeah, exactly. So I don't know. I'm, I'm, I did Google how long it takes for butthole hair to grow back. And so I will probably be back. You have to keep going once I need to. Great. Four to six weeks. Yeah. Usually once a month. Once a month. Yeah. But you know what? It's less painful every single time you go. Natalie was just going to say, and Nick, you'll notice they won't have to do the extra strips

as you go because the hair learns to not grow as thick or is like, because it's like being ripped out by the follicle every time. So you'll have a better experience each time you go in theory. So Nick, are you going to become a regular? Yeah. I mean, I think I think I have to what a show and I was I was even asking my wife if she could learn How to do it don't know that don't do this Save money now Go once a month. Yes, I can't I

Mean I'll take it for me to go once a month? I can't. I mean, I'll take it. But it's like, you know, I can't afford that. Like, hold on, hold on. I think you sent us a bill. It was like 40 bucks, right? 55. 55 bucks. We will send you money for the year.

If you promise to go once a month, do not have your wife wax your butt hole, my king. Buddy. So you don't have like tummy time with your wife? No. You're saying save the money, save the marriage. Yeah, you're not gonna be able to go, you won't be able to go to the waxer anymore and talk about how much you love your wife

because there will not be a wife because you've ruined your marriage by saying wax the back. There are certain things that the other person should never see. One of them is you with your legs up like a little baby with your dick in your body. And she waxes your butt and then later you go like,

what do you think, you wanna have some romance? And she's like, not with your fucking baby turtle ass. That's fair. Fair. That's fair enough. She's like, not with your fucking baby turtle ass. That's fair. Fair. That's fair enough. What if she catches poop? Now let me ask you another question. Maybe this has come up with another,

I've come up with another problem in my head. Oh God. Do I, on the website of The Waxing Place, it has the option of choosing the same person over and over. Should I choose the same person each time or. Should I choose the same person each time or should I go to a different person each time and then have to re-explain how much I love my wife

each time so that all of them know I'm not a pervert. You know what I mean? Nate, I gotta say, I love the way your brain works. You are perfect for the show. That's a perfect follow-up. Morgan, Natalie, do you guys always go to the same person? Yeah, same person. Yeah, you build, you actually have a relationship. You build a relationship with this person. I've had great conversations with my wax specialist.

See, I'm gonna go the opposite direction. I do not want the same person. Why? I don't want to read, you want to have as many people see your asshole as possible? No. Take your public figure. Think about that. I agree, but I don't want that relationship. Oh, I don't want. How you doing? And they go good. And I go, Oh, what happened with Stacey's ice skating? And she goes, she twisted her ankle. Hold on, let me get in your butthole here and wax. And I go like, ah, it's too bad. She was practicing so hard. I don't want that we know each other's thing. We're more comfortable with each other.

I walk in there. I turtle on my back. My dick goes in my body. And I say. You want as many people to see that as possible. And I say, I'm not a pervert. I love my wife. Yeah.

Hey, Jake from New Girl came in He he went on his back and as soon as his knees touched his sternum his dick vanished And my wife would say his dick is always vanished Have him walk around it's the same thing I would go to the same person 100% the same person. Yes, Natalie's same person, Morgan's same person. Oh, yeah. Sherlock, you on this call? Yeah.

If you were to get a wax, and I can tell by your face, you got some hair on that body. You wouldn't like the feeling of a wax, I can promise you that. Have you ever had a wax? No, no wax. If you were to get, if you were to turtle and get your body waxed down there, would you go to the same person or a different person for your next one?

I think same person. I like having the same person cut my hair, and that's the only thing I can compare it to. Yeah, I think that's a very different kind of comp though. Yeah, totally, totally, yeah. But that's the closest thing I got. So Nick, I think the majority are saying same person. I am going to double down on new person each time.

Where are you at here? What are you going to do? I, while you guys were talking, I was thinking, third option, should I ask the person, hey, like, I'm going to be doing this once a month. Should I just come to you every time? That's the weirdest. That makes it really strange. What if I sprinkled in, by the way, I love my wife. Wait, Nick, let's do this for real really fast. Okay. No joke. Let's do this for real. You be you and Morgan, you be the person working there. Okay.

And really say that you're asking them the question if they should use the same person again really fast. Let's just hear how that goes, Nick. Okay. Okay. You want me to go right now? Yeah, you're in the shop. This is number two.

Okay. Hey, how are you today? Okay. I'm good. How are you? Doing Okay. I'm good. How are you? Doing good. Thank you.

Yeah, we're just back here for another Brazilian, if that's okay with you. Yes, it's the business. Yeah. See how respectful that was? By the way, I love my wife. Did I mention that last time? Sorry, forget that. But I love my wife. Did I mention that last time? Sorry, forget that. But I was just curious,

I'm gonna be doing this once a month. Would you prefer if I just came to you every time or should I try going to different estheticians or what should I do? I mean, it's, it's a strange. Yeah. I need the business. Yes.

You can come to me every time. Okay. Okay. Okay. I'll, I'll, I'll do that. Yeah. No, you guys are right. That, that was weird.

I shouldn't do that. Perfect. Thank you for not heightening it and doing it. How they would, it's a business Nick. They're not doing it for pleasure. They're not like, I'm into this too, don't tell anybody. You're making it seem like this is like, you guys are meeting in an alley and not telling anybody.

This is her job, brother. Yeah, you're right. You're right, I'm overthinking that. All the questions and qualifiers, never mention your wife again. I also think it'll be inherently less weird the further times you go, because I'm assuming you're not going to record it every time. Well, I just think.

Show doesn't hate the idea of the record every time. Going it out. Yeah, great. The next step when you don't record it, it'll be less weird, especially just because you recorded your face the whole time. Like a pervert. And you kind of were smiling. So that you can relive it. So Nick, you gonna do this once a month?

Yeah, yeah, I'll do it. Gareth, are you comfortable if we send him a check for the year? I'm fine with that. Okay, we're going to pay for the year. I want you to go once a month and then follow up with us each time. Maybe a little voice note recording of how it went. Are you willing to do that? We could just add it to the show.

Yeah, yeah, I can do that. And then we'll bring you back on in a few months and do a real followup of, did this fix the problem? Okay. Will do. And you're saying just, just so we have it on record, you're saying don't go see a doctor, right? Sounds like a legal issue.

Well, Gareth is saying see a doctor. Morgan, where are you at? I think be ready. Have one queued up because if in a few months when we follow up, I think like potentially have a doctor lined up. But I don't think go yet because we have to see this through. Natalie, where are you at? You got to go see a doctor.

Sherlock, where are you at? Yeah, doctor see a doctor. Sherlock, where are you at? Yeah, a doctor's a good idea, but I get why you don't want to. The community seems to be 70 to 80 to 20. See a doctor. Nick, would you take your car in for service if it was driving perfectly? I wouldn't, no.

Would you send back a chicken burrito that tasted right? I would not. Neither would I. Jake, I have a question for you. Would you want to hire a lawyer you didn't think we needed to right now in the future? Why do you think I spoke in code there? Because, Garrett, when we go to court, I will be representing us. We'll be calling a different podcast for legal help. Our lawyers are going to be called Mr. Bigley and Mr. Moe. Good Lord. So Nick, we're going to, you know, this is the beginning of a long-term relationship,

my friend, and we're very curious, and what I really in my heart of heart hope is that this solves your problem, and you just become a guy that, look, you might have just had a hairy butt, my man, and you can open the hood and keep looking and find, first of all, I would say, I would figure out your diet

A little bit nine dumps in a day is too much. It's crazy. I Would slow down on the fiber figure out what you're doing So in your car analogy Jake every time he parks there's a big oil spot, but you're saying the car runs fine No, there's some flags memory now that there's there's some flags fine no there's some flags memory now that there's there's some flags so some flags see if you could change that dial of it but you shouldn't be going to the bathroom more than two or three times a day brother okay if that keeps going maybe check the car out but in terms of yeah look under the hood but as of right now in terms of leaving streaks behind. Hey, man

Little wax it once a month with a dear friend of yours. We all know you like it. We know you're a little pervert Thank you We must be nice. Let me so nice. Thank you. Just a little pervert, dude It must be nice to get from your sauna your steam and not see poop on your It is nice. It is nice. And I really appreciate, I really appreciate the help. It feels like a home run. It does for us too, my man. This is an absolute home run.

Ring the bell. Nick, you're the best buddy. Thank you, Nick. Congratulations. Best of luck, Nick. Thank you. Thanks. I appreciate it.

I like that Gareth's just sitting here, bald. Gareth, G-A-R-E-T-H. Reynolds, R-E-Y-N-O-L-D-S. Alright, my friend, you're all set for 1 p.m. over at our **** center. Okay, thank you very much. Of course. Okay, bye. Oh, fuck me. So, I'm, this all just happened so rushed.

I was like, I, you know, look, I don't want to go get this goddamn thing I never wanted to get it But then I was on I was talking to Nat attack because I thought I had someone scheduled to do the show I didn't I'm an idiot whatever so she's like well go get your wax and I was like I thought I was waiting she's like no so now the whole thing's rushed and Then I were texted Jake and Jake's like I don't know you don't have to go do it But uh, but that's like go do it. But Nat's like, go do it. So I'm like, so now I'm driving to this goddamn waxing. And I don't think, it feels crazy.

So for every month you do get like $10 in points and stuff like that. Okay. If you want to give me the birthday amount. No, I'm good. I'm not, this is kind of be a one-timer, I think. No, no, yeah, it's all good. Do you mind if no I'm good I'm not this kind of be a one-timer I think do you mind if I'm when I'm in there I have the audio of my phone as like a voice memo just for my reaction is that okay um okay all right cool Okay, cool. Um, so, okay, so let me see, da da da.

Um, okay, cool cool. And then, um, you do get the service half off today for your first time. Okay. So, can you just confirm your due? Sure, sure, sure. Awesome, perfect, there you go. Alright, I just hit the win, she'll be out pretty shortly. Okay. How much does it cost? It usually costs 67.

Okay. So you're gonna do it for 33.50. Okay, cool. And you don't do the front too, do you? You just do the- No, no, it's all. Oh, it is all of it? Yeah, it's all.

Oh, so it's the full Monte. It's everything except for the butt cheeks. Oh yeah, I don't want the butt cheeks. Okay, yeah. If you didn't want that, it would be- They're bare anyway. Yeah. Okay. Okay, gotcha.

Okay, thanks. Appreciate it. I promise you'll hear it and you'll think it's funny. So it's purple. Yeah. Should I get on the table already? Yeah, I'll have you adjust the waist down. Okay.

Okay, gotcha, thank you. I've never had anything like this done before. And what made you get a bad head? So my show is like a call-in show, Fully Naked? Just front of the way down. Okay, all right, gotcha. My podcast is a, like, a advice call-in show. Mm-hmm. So people call in for advice and-in show. So people call in for advice and stuff.

And so. Butterfly. Butterfly? Okay, I've never done anything like this. No, you are good, you're good. So this guy was getting it done, so I said I would do it as, because he was getting it done.

So I was like, okay. So it's a It's a first Yeah Sure, yeah you go for everything This is insane to me though. So you do this all day You know this this version of it like for men. Yeah It's men or women. Yeah Like for men? Yeah.

I mean, that's- It's men or women? Yeah. It's a men bucket and then they- On a scale of one to ten, how much does this hurt? Everyone is different. Everyone is very different. Okay.

But I would say just in general, I would give it maybe a seven for a first timer. Oh boy. Yeah. So it's like you're putting mayo on the bun of a sandwich kind of- I would give it maybe a seven for a first timer. Oh boy. So it's like you're putting mayo on the bun of a sandwich kind of. Sure. Oh my Lord. How's the temperature? Temperature's fine, but it makes me nervous that,

you know. Yeah, it's definitely gonna be like something that's very, I can already feel with that hair on the side of my leg that that's gonna hurt. But it may be different compared to like actually... Yeah, okay. In the hair, you know? Okay.

Boy, this is... Oh, oh, wow! Yikes! That definitely... Oof. It was only for a second. Only for a second? For a second.

Oh, wow. Now, did you want to do everything or did you want like a landing shot or something? No, I don't want a landing shot. No, thank you for asking though. I like to give you guys an option. Sure, that's nice. Yeah, I think I'm past that phase.

But your hair is short, so it's- I did just trim. Okay, yeah. There, but the- Oh, wow. But the rest I've never trimmed. I mean never like you know shorned myself that much. Oh boy I can already tell this is gonna be wild. So how long have you had a podcast before? This podcast is about two years now. So I think that's when they say the waxing face is oh my god.

Is it bleeding? Okay. Oh, that was nuts. Oh my lord. That was nuts. I didn't know there was more there. Wow, this is really, this is more than I expected, I'll be honest. And then how much does the back hurt more or less than that? For the butt strip?

Yeah. Is I fully on the butt strip? Yeah. Okay. Your butt strip. Is it like what? If you're talking about like right here then I don't know I think it's different. I don't know. Are you gonna do right there? Is that normally what happens? Yeah. You want me to? How bad is that? We're talking about the balls. How bad is that? I don't think it's that bad. I know I'm asking you to like weigh in on parts that... I wish I could give you like a...

Yeah. Do you feel like when men get it, they freak out more over that or less? I think less. Really? Yeah. Okay. All right. Like it's scary. Like they're just like, how the hell do you do it? It is definitely scary. This is all scary. Yikes. Wow. That is intense.

We're like halfway done. I don't know if I feel good or bad. Wow. Wow. That is... I won't be asking you like your assistance, so... You need me to... Yeah, okay, sure, you tell me whatever you need.

Whoa. But I mean, that wax is hot. Is it like burning? No, it's just my core temperature has risen dramatically in the past two minutes. This moves fast though, huh? Yeah, no, I feel like if I was a reactor sirens would be going off Wow This is wild

Oh, you know what it is less on the the scrotum on the scrotum. It's less right there? On the scrotum, but then once you go to the other side, it's back to... The nerve endings are real. Hey, you're doing pretty good. Pretty good, right? You may think that you're probably reacting crazy.

I think I'm having a pretty bad reaction, like with how I'm... Okay, as long as you're not like, man, this guy's, okay. Like you're not sweating. I am sweating up here. You're not sweating now. Okay. I'm keeping it up to the top. Like a thermometer. Yeah, and then like, I mean, yeah, you're reacting.

I thought it was a normal reaction. Okay. Women react less. Yes. I don't think you guys could really handle that. As good as we can. I don't disagree. I'll tell you, after this, I really't think you guys can really handle this. As good as we can. I don't disagree. I'll tell you, after this, I really, this is, it's more than I thought it would be. I thought it would be like something, but oh, wow.

Do you usually shave, though? Yeah, I just trim with like a manscaper deal or something. Oh, my Lord. It's just, wowee. Oh my lord. Just wowie, wowie. Wow. Can I have you grab the other hand? The other hand. Can you hold, like hold your skin like that?

Yep, yep. Okay. Alright, so yeah, this is definitely up to you on how bad this hurts. I'm like, how do you think I get to decide? Well, because at the end of the day, everyone is different. It felt earlier like that actually didn't hurt as much, but... Mm-hmm. Wow. Yeah, everyone's different, so what may hurt for you may not hurt for much, but... Wow.

Yeah, everyone's different, so what may hurt for you may not hurt for you. Yeah, okay. Well, I'll stick around for their session and talk to them too. I have another, like, Brazilian pee. This is your only one today? Yeah, that's my only one for today. You probably feel good about that. Well, how do you get...

Well, you'd rather...my guess is in your line of work, you'd rather not do these. You don't care? I don't care. I actually wish I had more, but it's okay. Oh my God. How was that? It's just, I'll be honest, it's nothing against you, but none of it's been good. Okay.

It's nothing against, yeah, it's, but we're moving down, we're marching down to the promised land. Yeah, we're getting there, we're literally almost done. But yeah, I wouldn't mind having more, but. Why is that? Because of financial or you like doing this? I mean, it's actually cool. Like, I mean...

That's cool to hear. Not causing you guys pain. No, no. I would imagine that's nice too, though. Who doesn't want to knock down a white guy a little bit in this society of ours? But, no, I mean, like, it's a good experience. Like, I mean, not a lot of women are comfortable with waxing in. Yeah, right.

I don't care. Well, good for you, because I'll tell you, this is a first for me. So I don't even... Ah, ha ha ha, hey! I love having a conversation with you while this is happening. Ha ha ha. No, I really appreciate that. Yeah, that's why I was like...

And I'm a last minute bookie, so you're like, this guy's got to be out of his mind. Who's like, I need a know what... And I'm a last minute bookie, so you're like, this guy's gotta be out of his mind. Who's like, I need a 911. Oh my goodness. Is your podcast live? It's like, you know, we tape it all live, but then it's edited, yeah.

Okay, okay. Yeah, it's... But so this guy called in and he was gonna get one and then we started talking and I sort of said I'd do one in the solidarity move and then all of a sudden I was like, it was but now that I'm here I'm like what was I doing? Is good. Yeah. Like, we're fully temporary, but then, like, you know, you can see what's going on with the job. Going on.

I needed that. Two weeks. Oh, really? OK, yeah. I think if I ever get one again, you'll be my person. I'll be here. Are we done with the front part? Almost.

We got one more there. I have one more strip. OK. I need you to give me your hair. Do the same thing there like that Okay, sorry Okay, I just hold it like right here. Okay. Yeah. All right Yeah, I'm doing great I just it's definitely a first

It's the see now we're getting to the Yeah, now we're getting to the... Yeah, now we're really... Things are happening. This is one of the strips I did on the other side. Oh, it's the... Oh, I thought... Oh. Pardon me, I thought we were done. So then what is the aftercare of something like this? So, um...

So, like, the postcare, you do not want to take a shower... Okay. ...for 24 hours. Okay. You're not going to any swimming pools... Okay.... 24 hours. Okay. You don't want to go into any swimming pools. Okay. Or any jacuzzi.

Okay. Or beaches. Okay. Any like. Body of water, water at all. Yeah, cause you don't want to cause any infection. Okay, I don't want that. Or irritation from any bacteria.

Okay. And then same thing with like no friction or sexual activity. Whoa. No sexual activity. Okay. You can go ahead and let go. Okay.

Um, no gym. Like nothing does your college in the school. That's for 24 hours? Okay. And then, um, after 24 hours, you can shower, but I would prefer, especially for first timers, to just use their hand and do the floor. Sure. Okay. Okay. Um... Whoa. I would prefer, especially for first timers, to just use their hands and do flow or wash clothes.

Okay. And gloves. Okay. And then could I work out after 24 hours? Yeah. Okay. Yeah, and then, I mean, at the end of the day, I can't control you.

I'm not the wax police. I can't follow you. No. And you don't do anything. But if you do need to work out, make sure you shower immediately. Okay. And again, use your hands. Gotcha. And no gloves do anything. But if you do, you can take a shower. Yeah. Make sure you shower immediately. OK. And again, use your hands.

Gotcha. You can use gloves or anything. Yeah. And then as far as active care, you do want to exfoliate. OK. Exfoliate the whole thing. To be consistent. Good job.

Good job. We'll be waiting for you. You're going to be crazy. This is nuts. You get that set, and then we're gonna do your butt strip, okay? Okay is the butt strip one or two or what is that? Same like the rest? Two, okay. Yeah I try to only do two and I'm like doing four.

Okay I don't either. We're on the same team. Yeah. We're the same page with the number. I like to get it done and over with for you guys. Can I have you hold up like this? Yep. Yep.

I'm gonna hold it up like this? Yep. Yep. Okay. What was I saying? You were saying the shower, like no workout, no hand, no... The aftercare. Yeah.

I would like for you to exfoliate. Right. But it's totally up to you. That just helps with no ingrown hairs and stuff like that. Or irritation. If you feel irritated, exfoliating helps to relieve it. It gets rid of the dead skin. It helps prevent ingrowns from forming. Which we're trying to not have. Yeah. And then, now we're trying to be consistent.

It's still good to do the same aftercare if you shave. OK. It helps you get a closer shave and everything. OK. So it feels like we're done with the, uh. I'm going to do a clean up real quick. Oh, no. OK.

What does that mean? You just missed a couple zones? Yeah. OK. So it's not your feeling like it's drips. It's not's it's not Cuz it definitely feels like you're going back to a zone that was Okay

Yeah, that did hurt less Hmm I think you're doing great too. Thank you. We're a real good team on this one, although I will say it feels like you're going over that spot again. So you're a clean house. Okay, I know, yeah.

I'm not suggesting that you're trying to kill me. I'm not trying to. I just don't be a byproduct when I die on the table. Good job, good job. Wow. We're checking in invigorates. Okay, yeah. So you are having your...

Go ahead, hit me with it. Your skin is reacting as if you have histamine. Okay. Correctly normal. You just have to let your skin be. Put a bead on, oh okay. So in this case, I would very much like for you to literally stay away from any showers,

anything that I just want you to do. Yeah, I won't. Any pools. I won't do anything. Yeah, let your skin relax. Yep. This should definitely go down within an hour. Okay, I'll drive home bottomless.

Like you said, do that. Loose fitting clothes. Okay. I think you should be fine. Okay. I'm gonna have you bring me to chest. Okay, knees to chest. We're really getting to know each other.

We are becoming friends. We might as well be, you know. This is, this, I did not, oh my Lord, this is the craziest thing I've ever felt someone else do. Now, like I said, it doesn't hurt, it just feels very uncomfortable. Sure. Would you say the other stuff hurt? Like the top part? Yeah.

I feel like for both genders, um... That's worse? The top part is probably the most painful. Okay, alright. This is a crazy position I'm in right now. I mean, this is probably the best position you would like to be in compared to any other ones. I mean, on the couch, a sleep is a great one too. Do you sleep like a flammary stomach or something?

No, no, no, no, no, no, no, just in general, not for a waxing. Oh, yeah, that's not as bad. It's not heaven, but. Oh wow. It's not hell. No, it's not hell, no. Okay, sure, yeah. Wow.

All right, go ahead and relax. Relax, okay. Oh my lord, I just had my first look at it. Mom, I have you just open up real quick for me. Okay, like that? Yeah, just relax. Okay. I'm pleasant to your ambition.

Okay. I feel a lot better for you. I mean, it looks like, it looks like when like a really out of shape kid in gym class would run a lot, which was me. Yes. Oh my Lord. It is very, very red.

No fault of you. It really isn't? Okay. Okay. It's a lot. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. Yeah. Okay. Oh really?

Is that all of it? We're done. Oh my lord. Oh, I cannot believe we did that. Look at how much I shredded the paper below me from my freakouts. Okay. Oh, I'm taking it with me like a... No, no, you're fine. Okay. Oh my lord, you are an angel. That's okay. Okay, yeah, yeah, don't fine. Okay. Oh my lord, you are an angel. That's okay. Okay. Yeah. Yeah, no worry. Well, that will feel weird. Like we've been through a lot together. That doesn't feel weird. Okay.

How do you feel? Just like that was crazy, but you were awesome and uh, and it actually does feel interesting. I feel like a dolphin boy. And it actually does feel interesting. I feel like a dolphin boy. watch video episodes of We're Here to Help, you can go to our Patreon at patreon.com slash here to help pod to see our entire catalog. We're Here to Help is produced by Rabbit Grimm Productions, executive producers Rob Hollis, Jeff Porter and Natalie Hollis, associate producer Jesse Thurston, editing, mix and master by Chris Fowler.

Theme song by Oliver Raleigh, the cover artwork is by James Fostike, animations by Andrew Strelicki, and if you'd like to see Gareth do stand up on the road, go to garethrentoldes.com. Remember all the advice given on we're here to help is for entertainment purposes only and all listeners should be adults and make their own decisions. All video episodes of season one are available now on Patreon and season two video episodes will be available every Monday starting January 20th. Go to patreon.com forward slash here to help pod. Hey there, we're here does that's the new name

we have for you. This is Gareth, just reminding you if you have not checked out my new podcast, next we have also a headgun production. Please do that. It is a show that just has a lot of good quick hitting segments that are funny. The show is just silly goofy. It's a good time. I think people will like it. That's why it was named Time Magazine's podcast of the year. That's a lie. Don't look it up. But you know, listen, we're here to help the best. So if you like this show,

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