We're Here to Help - 209: Very Important Pickles & Twenty-Second Pilot

Episode Date: September 22, 2025

Jake and Gareth help a caller convince his girlfriend to skip a friend's wedding for a Twenty-One Pilots concert. Then, they get involved in a farmers market turf war.Sara, 38, Philadelphia is looking for a friend! Think you could be a good match? Submit to the Friendship Game here: https://tinyurl.com/friendforsaraSee images from the episode here: http://www.heretohelppod.com/post/episode-209Want to call in? Email your question to [e-mail]: https://patreon.com/heretohelppodMERCH: heretohelppod.comINSTAGRAM: @HereToHelpPodIf you’re enjoying the show, make sure to rate We’re Here to Help 5-Stars on Apple Podcasts.Visit gemini.google/students to learn more and sign up. Terms apply.Advertise on We’re Here to Help via Gumball.fmSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

This is a headgum podcast. in Fort Collins a week ago. And I was like, during the show, I'm just like, you know, obviously, like, I'll talk to the crowd and stuff. So sometimes that can be misinterpreted by people. But anyway, what does that mean? That sometimes means that people will overjoin. Like, it's like...

It's now just a living room conversation. Yes. Your version would be you're out. Someone comes up to you, starts talking like, they know you talking to the person, you know, and you're kind of like, I don't fully, you know, let me handle this. So this girl very early goes, wowee, and I was like, okay, and I was like, whatever.

I was like, not enough time for that. So I kept moving. There's another lull. I hear, wowee, and I kind of go, what is with you? I'm like, are you trying to sell merch, whatever? Is wowie a merch thing? No, I just am like, is she, I'm like an audience member should not have a catchphrase. Oh, I get what you.

Of course. Yeah, yeah, of course. She does it a third time. and I'm kind of just there's nothing to like play with so you're just kind of like whatever I don't know what's happening over there that after the show she goes

I'm the wow wee girl I go hi way to go you know and she goes do you know what that's from and I go no and she goes when you got the Brazilian I was like what she goes yeah you kept saying

wow we during it it was like context would be a little helpful I mean that is shock yeah Shocking. What a world we've created. You experienced way more than me.

Yeah, I'm out there. You're out there. Parmesan is being signed quite regularly. Because I'll tell you what's different in my galaxy is that it has not really, it doesn't translate to my world. So I feel like this is a weird hobby that we do that's really fun. and every once in a while somebody will come up and go

I listen to the pod See I think if we did a live show I think you would be like Oh okay There's a lot of people out there Yeah Yeah that makes sense I think you would be a little

surprised at what's going on Today the only thing of business We have to do with our audience And I will say I enjoy the fact that we now have a lot of business with this community and our intros are one we need for people and what we have to cover.

There was a big period, season one, where they were just, and we are back. Anyone have anything? Anyone have got anything? What's a thing? We came up with all the thing. We're like, maybe we should have stories. Yeah, which is good.

But now you have a chimp head behind you. Now you live with a chimp head. I don't make a mean comment about Luke. Just go for it. He doesn't deserve it. No, I agree. He's a sweet husband to you Okay, what are you doing?

That's not mean, that's nice. It's not mean, but it's not nice. How is it not nice? Because I could just tell by, I could tell what nice is. What's nice? With you? There's nice, there's nice is a totally different. Your faux nice.

It's different. Yeah, even now you're... What's my actual nice? That was real good, dude. Not on the show. Not on the show. That was real good, man. It's like that.

That's what it is. Or a text. It's just like, that was a real good call. That was good. But your fake nice is, I want you to be happy. You're like, why are you upset? You're right. I'm helping.

That's my show nice. Yeah. We have some great stuff coming up. I mean, I'm sure people are probably sick of us talking about the calendar at this point. But, you know, that whole. Shocking. Yeah, I don't know what is even. happening anymore. I didn't even get to have the experience you got to have yesterday with him

to discuss it. I want my own slice of that. Yeah, and I think you should. I deserve it. Anybody who wants to join the Patreon, we're having a lot of fun there. We're starting to do a lot of live there. Just because it's its own weird thing. Patreon is still very new to me. It's a very strange idea, but what's becoming really nice about it is the freeformness of it all. Well, like you said, it's definitely influencing everything. So that's sort of, yeah, that's the lab. That's the work show. That's the lab.

That's the lab. That's exactly right. And then, Gareth, this is coming out at the end of September. You have a big special coming up October 4th. October 4th at the Den in Chicago. For all this stuff, you can go to garethrennalds.com. And, yeah, and boy, oh, boy, recording a special, mind being. Wow. Really?

Yeah. Just. Tell me why. What does it mean? Well, it's just. just now that I have to do it, it's like a lot of real lock. It's so much more like theater than anything else, where it's like I am really now focused on like this one speech, essentially,

and really just tightening it up and figuring out what works, what doesn't, all that. But can't you do two hours and cut it down to an hour? You can, but you also, no, but you want those bits to be very refined. so that there's good word economy. You know how the joke plays out the best. And I'll be honest, if you do two hours, people, like, imagine, remember one time you and I went to see, I don't know if you even remember this, we went to see the Groundlings, which is a fantastic institution.

So many great people have come from it. But I took you to a show at the Groundlings, and it was like three hours. It was long. And you and I were like, what is happening? Dying. And so you can't have people sit there. for two hours and expect them to stay with the same level. I think that's correct.

People, like, you'll, like, sometimes I'll be like, all right, well, I'm going to get out of here. And people will go like, oh, no. Other times I'll be like, all right, I'm going to get out of here. And you can tell people like, yeah, awesome. Yes. I want to go home, but I don't want to be rude. I'm tired.

I'll tell you a weird thing about my mom growing up. And I know Pam's not this way. And that's not a sex joke. What's your deal? Because you got defensive. I didn't say anything. I moved to coffee. Then it's on me.

It is. So's Pam. Go. Without. God damn it. Hi, everyone. Sweet Jesse here. We are pleased to announce that Sarah will be the contestant on our next friendship game.

She is from the Philadelphia area. So if you live nearby and think you might be a good match for Sarah, be sure to write into the show. Go to the link in this episode's description. And if you want to get to know Sarah a little better, check out episode 202. I have a connection. That's the Friendship Game Casting special. And good luck. This episode is brought to you by the great hungry route.

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and more. Visit gemini.gov slash students to learn more and sign up. Terms apply. Hello. Hello. Hi. Welcome to the show. Hi. This is so cool. It's going to be great. Can we get your name, Age, where you're calling from, please? I'm Ben. I'm 24. I'm from Florida. Where in Florida, Ben? Gainesville. Gainesville. Beautiful. All right, Ben. Why don't we just get into it? What is going on? So are you guys familiar with the band 21 pilots?

No. Yes. You should check them out. They're great. So my question is, how can I... Okay. How can I convince my girlfriend to skip her childhood best friend's wedding so that we can go to a 21 pilot's car.

Ben, we're going to lose. Yeah, this is... Ben. This is Everest. This is impossible. What is the event you're asking her to skip? Her best friend's wedding. Her childhood best friend's wedding.

Buddy. She's a 21 Pilots concert. Buddy. I called the experts. This is why I'm here. Look, we're not gods. Oh, this is hard. This is hard.

Shit. Okay, well, have you made the case to her already? No, she doesn't know yet. She hasn't, now I'm coming to you guys first. When is the wedding? October. I have a question for you. I have a question for you.

Ben, yeah. Is the childhood friend her current close friend, or was it just a childhood friend? No, just mostly, you know, they've lost, I mean, they're still close, but yeah, they haven't seen each other

that often. For context, they, you know, 21 pilots, favor bait. Come into Florida. Um, back in July, I got us tickets. Um, she doesn't care about 21 pilots, but she's supportive. Um, I did everything with the tickets. Super excited. And then back in June, or no, no, sorry, about three weeks ago, her best friend gets engaged. Toward it out of the blue. Um, they sent us to save the date later the week for a wedding in October. So I'm like, okay, cool. My girlfriend's excited. She starts planning for it, looking at hotels and dresses and then in a couple days I realized that it's the same evening as the concert I haven't brought it up I don't think she realizes it's the same day because I did

all the concert tickets and she's done all the wedding stuff um but we haven't you know my my real case is like there's sort of it's sort of a rushed wedding you know the official invitation hasn't even come yet they're only given us two months notice and 21 pilots is locked in I'm in deep. Is she in the wedding? TBD, I don't, the invitation hasn't come yet. But she would know if she's in the wedding already. Yeah, but here's the thing, Ben.

I think we do this in two stages. And I think the stages we do is first we get you at the concert and out of the wedding. And then you offer her. And the reason is, is maybe there's a chance you're, You're going to the pilot, and she's going to the wedding. Well, 21 pilots, but I see what you mean? What are you going to say? Pilots? We said the pilot. It's fine.

So she, I think, Jake, I mean, does that work for you? Because we could do that. That's just extract. We're taking you out of the wedding, and we're getting you there. And I think the way to do that would be to over-commit to it now. Get the hotel, forwarder the information. Or do we just go fucking crazy And do we just call her blind And try to do it together

Well, that's the thing You guys is I think she'll let me go Like I think she'll say This is your thing You know go with your dream But I want her to come I want her to have fun with me Yeah but

So Ben If we're going to go that road We need to have her on You know what's true I was trying to do this I was trying to do this Without her knowing I know but

You're posting But you're making her make an impossible choice. You're like, you're making her say, choose me over your childhood best friend. You only get one wedded. I'm sure these 21 pilots are going to perform for the next 20 years together. These guys will come back when they're bald and gray-haired.

Who cares? I just... Eric will start seeing him then. In 40 years, Eric is going to see these guys live. Eric's going to have one of their beards in a bag. Eric's going to have their garbage in a trench coat. So, Ben, do you see the predicament we're kind of in? I know it's a tough, it's a tough ask I'm asking for here.

Now, for context, this friend, they, you know, her and the fiancé, they haven't, you know, been dating for less than, you know, it's been a couple months. The fiend, that's what I'm saying. You got, like, the groom. Keep going. Keep going. Groom's got a three-month-old kid with someone else. What?

That shit, right? That's what I'm saying. You know what? Okay, just hearing Ben lay it out right now, Jake. I agree. You know what might be good. You know what we might need? What?

How about a PowerPoint? How about we set Ben up with a PowerPoint to pitch to the girl? All the pros and all the cons. And I think the pros are you've prepped this. You've been planning on this. This is going to be forever. This means a lot to you. And the other thing feels a little bit like a rushed ceremony.

You don't think it's going to be forever. You think she's going to get another crack at this girl's wedding because of the moments you're laying out right now. It might be nice to sit her down and just present this tour in an organized fashion where you're kind of actually shark-tanking it. You make a real pitch for the 21 pilots. And how about this? the hotel you book nice the money that you're going to save on not having to go to this wedding

you're putting it on the dinner before the concert the hotel that you're going to be staying at you know class it up i think you're not doing yourself any favors by waiting for it to all come to a head so i wouldn't bank on anything other than the invitation isn't there yet you've not committed to it. I'm suggesting we can't make it. If you were going to be in the wedding, you'd already know about it. Let's go to this concert. Wait a second. The 21 pilots, that's, is that Debbie Ryan's husband? Joshua Dune, D-U-N? Yeah, yeah. Okay, I just worked with Debbie. Maybe we could ask Debbie to get him to make a video for the PowerPoint.

And Jake, a backstage pass. Well, I don't want to push him. I don't want to push him. I don't want to hear it. No, a video is easy. Okay. A video is all he's got to do is just do a, in the PowerPoint presentation, go, like, say, hey, Ben asked me to make this video for you. And then if we can write something up for him where he goes,

he says, I want you to come to this concert. Look, they've only known each other for three months. It's a rushed wedding. Ben bought these tickets before. I just think you're making a huge mistake. And then go, but obviously do what you're going to do. And then be like, Ben, I'll see it the concert, brother. And don't tell her beforehand.

I love that. Now, she, I don't think she'll recognize him. But I'll get a kick out of that. And I think that he'll just. She'll pick up on the weight of it. No, but she won't, but I appreciate your honesty. Well, it could be a closure. But if she were a diehard fan, too, like Ben's going to freak out, but she's going to go,

that's amazing. That's so nice of them. I'm not a, I don't get it. She'd probably have a heart attack over Debbie Ryan more. But we, that's a different animal. Sure. No, I know. But, um, okay.

But you know what, Ben, here's what I like about you. And I'm going to be honest with you. I like a lot about you. I like that you're not letting us off the hook. you know what you want and you're being honest because the truth is I don't want to do

it's fun to get a musician to do a cameo feels good for the show but who gives a shit it's not I don't think it's gonna help well I mean it might help a little I don't want

but we're talking about a little but we only go down the road to eat the meat sauce if we're starving for meat sauce does that understand then gotcha gotcha you don't go to a Greek restaurant

if you want Italian food Valid. Do you say salad or valid? He said salad. And yeah, I'm hungry too. Yeah, we're all starving. We've been on this three hours. Three hours now.

So, Ben, what do you think of the PowerPoint presentation where you lay out all of your argument? I love a PowerPoint. I've been told that's where I thrive. Now, what, I like the Shark Tank route. She's going to love that. how like what shark am I playing this at like Mr. Wonderful am I doing like who do you connect to the most who do you connect to the most I mean Robert but like is Robert getting the most done

what he's he's having the most fun I don't I don't think I don't think Robert's I don't think Robert's the right around me to say. I mean, unless you want to end up in a sleeping bag jumping around pretending you're an inchworm or something. I think what you do is you say one night, you sit her down and you say, honey, there's something I want to talk to you about and it's pretty serious. You play the Shark Tank theme on your phone and you come in and you say, you know, you could

even do a little voiceover. It's like, please welcome to the tank, Ben. Ben wants to make a to his girlfriend about going to a concert. And if you did the actual Shark Tank, does she know the show Shark Tank? Oh, she loves it. So then you do the actual Shark Tank music, and you walk through those things. Yep.

You walk through the doors. And you say, hi, Shark, I love you. Let me start there. And I want to tell you about a divergence in the road right now where we need to make a choice as a couple. on the one hand we have a wedding to a friend that you've not kept in the best to touch with you're probably not going to be in it let's be honest on paper doesn't seem like it's going to work out so you're probably going to get another crack at it but on the other hand and then you start

bringing up some pictures of the concert some pictures of the band you bring up a picture of the hotel you've got let me pitch something a little bit different on that ben because when i'm hearing that I'm getting defensive of the, I don't like the fork in the road of relationship, and I don't like hearing how negative the wedding is first. I think she should be totally confused about what all this is, and it's just fun. I like that.

You should make it very confusing, and then all of a sudden she should realize, oh, he's right. Both these things happen on the same night. And that's when you go like, that's why I need your help. I need your commitment. to figure out how to do this because I think we would enjoy the concert more together

than a wedding that realistically you can go to her next one in 18 months. Well, you know what? I like that a lot. And I think maybe I'm not trying to push. If you set it all up about let me tell you about 21 pilots, let me tell you about the concert, let me tell you about some of the metrics of the band, then it might be cool. if it's not a pain in the ass, to get a video that just sort of says,

hey, I would really love it if you guys were at the concert. You know, Ben, whatever, I would really love it if you guys were there. That cracks it. Then, like you're saying, her head spun a little bit, and you go, and obviously this falls on the night of this other wedding. And, you know, something like that. I also think a picture of the accommodation of the concert where you're going to stay a nice place.

I think Jake's right. Make her really excited for the concert before telling her, the predicament and what you're not here's another pitch ben is there any 21 pilot song she likes oh i mean the ones you know the big ones on the radio everyone knows you know she's supportive she's in but i don't know if she would like know the name of a song okay so then here's what i'd like you to do the most popular song they have i would like you to write a new lyrics with the same melody and write a song parody about wanting to go over the wedding with her and perform it for her and dress up like the band.

Oh, man. It's called One Pilots. I like that. Jake, I'm not a singer. Doesn't matter. That's what everybody says. You're a committer. You know who said that?

A little boy named Ray Charles. Ever heard of that? He's a little boy named James. He said he's not a singer. His last name is Brown. Ring a bell. Hardest work in a show business. Because you know what?

Ben, you might not be a singer, but you know what you are? A performer for this event. Exactly right. You're a committer. You don't know. You're a lover. You're a fighter. You don't know karate, but you know Karate.

Arguably the greatest lyric of all time. I agree. Without question. Did you hear it? Listen to it. it again, Ben, because it's important. You don't know karate, but you know crazy.

Do you understand? You might not be skilled at the art that you're about to perform, but you know, you know how to win. That should actually be the tagline for our show. We're here to help. We don't know karate,

but we know crazy. It's like, it is the greatest lyric of all time. By the way, I wouldn't fight them. No, it's worse. It's like, I know karate, but he knows crazy. I don't have a code. It's crazy. I'm just crazy.

So, Ben, we've given you a couple of ideas. I'd love to hear you kind of talk. I'd love to get your POV. Would you just kind of take over and stream a conscious let us in the audience know and that sweet guy out in Greenland, what you're thinking? So, PowerPoint, I'm loving it. Like, that's in my comfort zone. I like that.

You know, the songs, that's a little, you know, I haven't done that before. I'm nervous. Do you think I pair that with the PowerPoint or is it either or? No, I think you pair it. I think it could be the closer on the PowerPoint. You don't need to do a whole song, but you could do a verse. You could either, well, here's what I really think, Ben. I think you do what's going to work.

So, you know, some people go on Shark Tank and they do, like, silly bits and they're stupid? And then other people do silly bits. And all the sharks laugh. Because they're drunk. Well, don't do the bit if it's not going to land. So if you sing and it's stupid, what are you doing it for? A radio show? We got a lot of things going on this show.

We got a fucking Super Bowl coming up September 19th. So you're doing this to convince her. If you think the song's going to work, then do it. But if you think in the end, I think I can do a killer PowerPoint because that's where I'm good, then let's fucking win where we win Okay I hear you

I'll apply to my strengths Powerpoint is for sure Maybe if I'm feeling braids I'll put in some verses at the end We'll see Yes if it's there I'll read the room Yes

And when are you going to do this I mean like so Weddings up mid-October Invitations You gotta get to work You got to get her so she could maybe, once she RSVPs, yes, you're dead. Yeah, you've got to beat the invitation. You've got to beat the invitation and lock her in.

Seriously. Because once the invitation shows up, it's over. It's over. So I think you've got to do it like ASAP. You got a week. I think you've got a week, and it might be good for you to rehearse it with us before, if you can. If not, I would just record it for us. to have some highlights of.

I think that's right. I think you've got to get to work. And I think what you do is you put together why the night will be so special for her. Why she'll enjoy it. I think around the edges, nice dinner, nice hotel, all that stuff. And then afterwards, like Jake said,

I think you present the dilemma, but you've already put all the marbles on the scale in your favor. I agree with this. I like that You guys I was I was planning on staying at my parent's house But I will look in the hotel

No you can stay at a parent's house Save the money You're a 24 year old guy Yeah but they're gonna be spending money On the wedding hotel anyway You're talking about just saying For the money you're going to spend on the wedding This is what we can do just you and I

I respect that Because I think that all the time Whenever I get invited to a wedding It's such a cost ask Ben What are we doing here babe I'm going to do the PowerPoint I'm going to get to work on this

I'll record a run through and I'll send it up I understand the timeline so I'm going to get on this I think you should have your laptop with some pictures that are compelling well that's in the PowerPoint I hope so I just want to make sure we're really going

you know let's kitchen sink this pictures of the band pictures of maybe the hotel Maybe pictures, Photoshop pictures of you guys together at the concert. If you can do that, get in a couple AI pictures of you guys at the concert, what it looks like. I like it. And this should end with, I love you. Either way, I love you.

Take away either way. I love you. Okay. But I'll love you more at the concert. Exactly. Take away that. No, take away that. No matter what I love you.

No matter what I love you. And then you play the song. I feel good about this. Then you play the 21 Pilots song. And ask her to dance. And you ask you to dance when you sing it. Ben, you take what you like. You drop what you don't.

But get to work. Send us your rehearsal. Yeah. You take what you like. You drop what you don't. You take what you want. Don't you drop what you don't. Pretty good.

But Ben, will you please send us that thing ASAP and follow up with us, bud? Oh, I'm on it. All right, buddy. Thank you. Go get him. Thank you for your help. Appreciate you. Thanks.

Thank you, bud. Hello. Hello. Hello. How you doing? Good. How are you? Welcome to the goddamn show.

Hi. I'm so excited. Okay. We are in the 200s, Jen. Oh, wow. Yeah. This is probably like 203 or something crazy. How does that make you feel, Jen?

I guess special. Me too. All right, Jen, take it away. Okay. I'm Jen. I'm 25 and I am from Connecticut. Okay. How close you to New York?

I actually used to live in New York I used to live in the Bronx But now I'm like two hours from New York City Okay And what are you doing in Connecticut Well I do fertility research And I'm also an EMT So that's what I do

At my name jobs Yes Fucking cool job How long have you been in an EMT Not long I just started I've been doing fertility research for two years though Neat

We almost had a baby named after us recently Yeah. I mean, you guys have some good names. What's your greatest takeaway from all the fertility research you done? You learned anything? Any big cliff notes on it? What do you got? Just how big stress affects everything.

So as long as you can have an easy, crazy pregnancy and keep your wife or your girlfriend calm, that's all you need to know. So you're saying when the baby, when the woman is carrying the baby, the more stress she's feeling, the worse it is for the baby and the mother? Yes. Well, isn't that interesting? Thank you for sharing that, Jen. All right, so let's avoid some stress. What do you got today?

Okay, so my problem is more on my side hustle. So I need advice on, exactly. I need advice on how to stop my farmer's market pickle rival from sealing all of my ideas. Explain. Okay. I sell pickles at the Walpole Farmers Market in Massachusetts every other weekend. And then on my off weekend, there's another pickle vendor. And he's like kind of brand new to the market and pickle business in general.

So then the first kind of like sign that he was copying me was I posted a picture that a customer sent to me of my pickles at the beach. And then a week later, he follows me. And then he posts a picture of the same photo. of his pickles at like an AI-generated beach. Oh, okay. So are you Jenny and Benny's pickles? Yes, we are Jenny and Penny's pickles. Okay, so you guys, and what's with the art with the dog eating a pickle?

Gotcha. So Benny's my dog and I'm Jenny, so Jenny and Benny. Oh, cute. And I donate a portion of my proceeds to the Hometown Foundation, and they donate to animal shelters, military veterans, first responders, those intellectual disabilities, and so on. So they're a great program. I love it.

And before we get into the work on this one, Jenny, what got you into the pickle business? So I enter, I just love pickles, and I entered a pickle competition at the Connecticut Pickle Festival. I didn't know there was such thing, did you, Gareth? No. Pickle competitions? They're the competition for everything. I would love a shirt that says winner of the pickle competition. Oh, that would be great.

I mean, I love pickles. Me too. Big pickle fan. I would take that as a sound bite. I love a good pickle. I love pickles. That feels like a Berg thing to say. I have to hike everything about Berg.

And then he goes, oh, Jesus. Oh, gosh, Jake. Everybody loved the pickle in their mouth. So, you love pickles. You started making pickles. You came up with a cool thing, Jenny and Benny's pickles. You go to Farmer's Market. You're selling good pickles, yes?

Yep, that's the fetch. Then this son of a bitch comes in and starts stealing your advertisement? And so your first pickle is your logo, your pickle jar on the beach, tilted in the sand. And then salt of the earth pickles comes out with a Lana Del Rey song doing time. And it's their pickles at a beach. Exactly. And it was like a week later, he had just followed me, week later, post the exact same picture. And he's, like, just starting up.

And I'm like, okay, like, maybe it's a coincidence. It's a start of summer, like, whatever. But I told all my friends about it. I wouldn't say, I wouldn't say that's a coincidence. I don't associate. I would never think I'm going to go buy pickles because I saw pickles at the beach like it was hanging out there. Well, it sounds like even if you gave him the benefit of the doubt, doesn't matter because it's about to get worse. Is it?

Exactly. So my friends were like, oh, no, they were like not on, oh, it's a coincidence side. They were like, oh, he's copying you. And they started commenting on his Instagram comments saying, like, look familiar, must be a pickle thing and a bunch of things. And I'm like, oh, my God. I'm going to be able to see those comments. Can we see what those loyal roads do?

It was just like three people that like after just said the same thing. Okay. And how did it, uh, were, I'm assuming it's a he. I think you said he, but how is he responding to it? He just said, pickle me. I don't know what that means. Pickle me. I wonder what that meant

It's weird Okay I don't know Yeah that was the first coincidence And then I had made shirts made And then next market He had shirts made But I'm like okay

What were the shirts you made It was just like of my logo on the left And then he had of his logo Jesus This is not a business Like Okay you need shirts I guess

It gets worse And then at my farmer's markets, I have like a sale technique where I have little pickle stickers that I give to like every kid that walks by. And then I also give dog bones to any dog that comes by. So then everyone comes as a sample and then they try my pickles. And so recently, it's been like five, six markets later. And now he just started reintroducing his pickles with his logo on it. And he hasn't had dog bones yet, but I'm watching out just in case. So now he's doing the stickers, too.

Mm-hmm. Shit. I mean, this is a total. He's like, stealing my technique. Yeah. And now he just started samples, like, last market. And he's never had samples before, which is why I'm like, oh, I've never had to worry about him

because no one wants to buy something you can't try. Buy before you try, or try before you buy. Agreed. Now, the catch with that is eventually everybody's going to do samples. Yeah. The samples are a different animal. I feel like he's got every right to do samples. apples. Yeah, but it's cumulative. All the other stuff, it's very clear that, okay, so I think

cumulatively, clearly he's influenced by you at minimum. So is there anything else? Has any other shit happened? Yes. So in my spiel that I talked to at the farmer's market, I always say, Connecticut's raining best spicy pickle champ since 2024. That's cool. And then recently, he started, he put on his post, World's Best Pickles. First of all, that's a blatant lie no title like i actually have a title and he's like stealing my little title this is heavy that that one was like the last thing where i was like okay he's like being deliberate now it's not just like oh he's starting a business no world's best pickle and i say i'm connecticut's reigning best spicy pickle champs what's this guy look like

what's his vibe here's what i'm like a gruffy kind of guy like what do you what do you want him to be I'm fucking hunk. I want him to look like a male model with, like, a little bit of a beard and, like, a plaid shirt. And then I want this to turn into, like, a really, I hate you, I love you, romance. Oh, you're looking for, like, the homework movie. I'm looking for the, ah, I make the best pickles. No, I make the best pickle. Yeah.

And they're eating there or they're kissing? Sex. Jesus, Jake. Well, then pickle me would make sense. Sex. So, but just give us a taste. He's not like that. He's not like that.

Okay. You're an older guy, 50-ish with greasy hair? He's not older than me, like maybe early 30s. Okay. Okay. So if you're cute, maybe it wouldn't have been a problem. Okay. And so interesting.

Do we know anything else about this guy? I have never met him like in person. You have not socialized. my off weeks. We have not socialized like in person. Oh, what do you mean on your off weeks? But she, every other week he goes to her, he's the pickle guy at the market one week,

she goes the next. And each week, he's kind of evolving closer to her business. Yeah, but you're not selling pickles when he's selling pickles and you're not doing it on my business. Is it affecting your bottom line? I mean, the first week, they're like,

oh, is this the same pickles as last week? Sure. And then and I'm like, no. But then I think he's gotten some business for me because they're like, oh, where's the pickle girl? Where's the pickle girl and her dog? Because I bring my dog to the market. Well, think about it this way.

I go to the farm. Every time I'm in town, I go to the farmer's market. And if you see something there the one week, you'll buy it. You won't be buying it the next week. The more that he's upping his profile as the best pickle or all that stuff, the less brand loyalty you're going to have to her. Have you tasted his pickles? I've not tasted his pickles.

I was going to have someone, like, just buy the pickles. Yeah. And I just want to see how good they are. But then I'm like, you know, it's not even worth it. It doesn't match us too. I got a pitch. So I think what you need to do, because I didn't realize the every other week, which I think is huge. So let's be honest.

How many pickles do people need? So if they're coming once a week, a lot of farmers market people, you go because you like it fresh, correct? So it's a lot of repeat customers. Yes. So why don't we do something that you do not advertise for it? But when somebody's buying, how much you sell in a jar of pickles for? $12 a jar. $12.

And he's doing the same. Okay. How's your pro? Hold on. Hold on. How's your profit on that? A lot. I make a good amount of money out.

Okay. So let's do this. When you have a customer, you say, I appreciate your loyalty. You give a little back and forth. then say to them buy one for 12 I'll give you the second one for six how about this

let me pitch on that here's why here's why then they don't come back to get pickles for the next week we ice them out I got a pitch on that just so that you're not biting into because that is

that could be a big margin loss Barbara Can I say something really quick Yeah of course So the only thing I don't like about that is that people buy like two jars of pickles for me So I don't, so buy two get the third one.

How about this? Let's come up with the stamp where it's eight jars. You get the ninth for free. So you have the little return stamp card. But then he's going to have a loyalty card. But then we're over here. But here's what we do. Here's what we do.

It's called a VIP loyalty card. Very important pickles. Very important pickles. You say to somebody when you give it to them, this is not for everybody. Do me a favor and don't tell anyone. Or even if he does that No, because then it's the same thing, then we're in the same problem.

Because what we want is only come to me, but I'm your pickle lady and make it like a joke like it's sketchy. Like it's a drug deal where you're like, hey, I appreciate it. I'm happy to be your pickle lady. You know what I kind of like in that is what if you even,

what if it's like because, look, it's going to be hard to pardon the pun, keep a lid on that. Why don't you just say, don't tell salt of the earth pickles about this? No, because we're at, we're then they're going to, you don't want people who aren't involved in the thing to get involved in the thing. Okay. I don't want them to go like, what's the other pickle place?

There's no other pickle place. You just go, hey, I appreciate your loyalty. So I'm trying something, but do me a favor. Keep it on the download because I'm not offering this to everybody. But I'm doing a fun, goofy thing called VIP, very important pickle. VIPP, very important pickle person, which I think you are, because I've noticed. And it's only people who have bought from you more than once. So I'm going to give you this.

Gotcha. When you buy eight, you... Yes, when you buy eight, I give you the ninth one for free. And they'll go... I like that, actually. They'll go, thanks. And you go, but do me a favor because I'm not offering that to everybody because I'm only making so many cards. Could you keep this a little on the download?

And they go, yeah, I go, but I'm just so thankful to the loyalty of my pickle people, and I've seen you over and over. So I was wondering if you want to be part of this. group. Then it's the same thing with like miles on a flight. You go like, well, I've got some at Delta. I don't want to do United because, well, I don't know. I've got 40,000 at Delta. You're part of the thing. I like that. I think you might have difficulty keeping it from him because he clearly, I mean, hell, he might have a mall. He might have a mall. He might have a mall. Clearly he's getting a lot of information. Well, I do think he has a spy. Like, yeah. That's crazy. So I think this is,

Okay, I like that. I like that just as a business move. That's separating you from him. I think that if he takes that idea, maybe you could do one of two things. One, you could have someone go confront him and just be like, hey, I work for... Don't volunteer yourself, Gareth, because you're not going to do it.

You have someone, could be someone loosely involved on the periphery of entertainment. go there and say and confront him to some extent and just be like, hey, I like come here. It feels like every week you're doing stuff that Jenny and Benny's pickles are doing. Is that coincidence? That feels weird.

That feels wrong. Something like that. If you wanted to step it up even bigger, you could do a brief pickle protest. The first pitch I had was why, don't you dress up or have someone you know dress up as the queen of pickles and start having that person hand out samples at the market and you could call yourself the best pickles in the universe you can't beat the universe um but i kind of feel like this might be a thing where you just

kind of do a couple of these and i think the loyalty program is just good business to begin with but then you could also like you know I think the thing is that you almost want to like call it out and be like I'm the queen of the pickles these are the best pickles at the market don't go anywhere else like something like that

but I think worst case you go to that fucking market and just go dude I'm like Jenny I'm the other pickle stand here am I crazy to think that you are like every week taking my ideas Do you think that's cool? Like the way the market works

is that we're a bunch of independent businesses who get along, but you've got to make your business your own and it's not cool to just take my shit. We could also write him

from the Farmers Market Council of America. We could write a weird organization letter. We could create a fake IG account called like Farmers Market Organization and just send him a direct message. Try to get some followers.

Send him a fake. a direct message that says like, hey, we have just heard rumblings that you are copying the work of Jenny and Benny's Pickles. Obviously, this is all independent. We are trying to stay away from corporate moves like thievery. Can you just please make sure you stay in your lane as best you can? I've got another idea. I like that a lot. I think we could come up with a fake organ. I do like that. We've got a lot of good coming your way. I think we could come up with a fake organization like that but you know what else we could do we could have a pickle off jenny could challenge him to a pickle competition at one of the markets where we have people enter Pepsi versus coat yes who's got

the best pickle and after that she will have the superior pickle and she can say voted best pickles at this market well you know we could actually use we could connect it to we can pick so people could we could could privately vote. The pickle pick. Yeah, we can do like a poll. You could do a poll. Yeah, the pickle pick poll. And we as the show would be the administration on it, so we won't cheat.

No. Now, this was similar to the air hockey thing where the PFFs. Yep. Jenny, you might not love the result. I believe in Jenny and Benny's pickles. I am confident in my pickles. I am selling out like every week. So why don't we do this?

on the Instagram, and he still has a full crate of pickle. So I'm not too scared. Let's do that. I think that's a wonderful idea. Why don't you challenge him to a pickle off? It's a good way to confront him about this a little bit. Have fun with it. Have fun with it.

It's going to make it a thing. And everybody that day gets to get a sample of a pickle, and then we'll give him a QR code or something. and like that, they just scan in, and they just vote. And then whoever wins that gets to have the billboard, and then the other person can copy, like, if he copies, if you're like, I am the official best tasting pickle at this farmer's market as voted by the people, then he will do a funny one.

Best pickle on the universe is voted by that you're like, but great. But you can even say, you can even say, like, best pickle at this market, I'm here every other weekend. If you want pickles on a weekend, I'm not here. You're better off waiting. Yeah. Or get the second. Oh, I like that.

What do you think of that, Jenny? I think that's a pretty fun idea. I think that's a good idea. I think it's a good way to confront them, but also, like, show off my pickles. And I don't care if I'm giving him a little bit of business. Of course. Yeah, it helps you, too.

Yeah, yeah, exactly. And then what do you think about if you could also ask him if he wants to come on the show and we could do it as a follower? up. And that is, we can talk to him about it too. You could also do it via Instagram, say, like, I'm trying to find a way to make this a little bit of fun. I am annoyed by it. I do feel like you're copying me. And the best way to do it is maybe we do like a pickle off where we could one week we both are there. Yep, that's what it would be. And we have a competition that day, and then we go back to the every other week. But I'm feeling like, I don't know why you're doing

and I think there's maybe a fun way to deal with it. I think that's pretty good. And I also think what you could do is, you know, you could really social media the shit out of this if you wanted to, have people filming you, getting ready for the competition, treat it like how a wrestler or how Rocky gets ready for a fight. And then what you could also do is at the end of it, you could have a monitor at your stand kind of playing on a loop

the fact that you have become the best pickle at the market. Yes. and you can make the winner gets an official trophy. Yes, yep. But the other one has to buy. To participate in it, you guys have both pitched in and bought a big trophy. Maybe the thing to do is to have this person on before we even launch it. And just kind of talk about the terms, what it's going to be, get some agreement on air,

and, you know, and kind of come up, work out the kinks and everything like that, that might be the best way to do it. How do you feel about that, Jenny? Yeah, I'd be down. Okay. Do you think I should message him and just let him know of the situation and then... Yeah, I don't know. Natalie, what do you think is best?

Like, what do you think is the best way to do this? Should we have her just message this person? Should the show message them? I think we'll get a better way. response if she messages because he clearly knows who she is and what's going on. Okay. Well, let's do that. Let's do that.

Why don't you just, you know, all in good fun, shoot a message, say we want to talk about an idea we have because they're the two, you know, they're the two pickle. You guys are the two pickle companies at the farmer's market. So, you know, you think you have a fun idea that you want to talk about on a podcast. Perfect. But Jenny, how do you feel about this? because we love it, but how do you feel about it? What are you going to do?

I think it's a good idea. I'm going to message him. Just let them know that what's going on. I'd love to have a pickle competition. I think it would bring a lot of people to the market in general. It would. I would be everything else. Yep.

If I was at a farmer's market with my family and we were going to get other stuff and there was a pickle off, I'm eating a pickle. And I'm voted. Totally. I'm into it. And then if I like it, I'm buying a jar of pickles. I agree.

Because right there when you eat them both, then what you also do, If you do the competition and you vote, you get $1 off. So then they go, I'm going for Jenny's. Sorry, brother. Love it. I'm going to sell a lot of pickles together. I think this is good, finally does now.

Yep. I like it. I'm taking a couple things away. I think I'm going to have my brother-in-law with a pickle costume. Great. I think I really like the loyalty card. Yes. And I think we need to do a pickle competition.

I think this, you're doing a good kitchen sink approach, too. So I think, uh, I think it'll all help. I'm going out with a bang. Okay. So reach out to the person who runs this, uh, this pickle company. And, um, and let us know. And we'll go from there. And we'll do a pickle off.

Perfect. Sounds good. I can't wait now. All right. Thank you guys so much. Thank you. You guys have a great. You too.

I do love a spicy pickle, but I'm not, I'll save that for off air. But you said that on air as I want to talk about it more, and I'll do that after. That's fair. I think to talk about it too. Right. Okay. Okay. Bye, bye, bye, bye, Jay.

Hello. Hello. Welcome back. How you been? I've been good. How are you guys? Good. We don't actually know who you are.

We know you're a follow-up. And might I just point out, this is the first call we've had since we've both got the chimp heads. This is our first follow-up call with the chimp heads in frame. And if anybody's thinking for holidays, go check out Rob's page and buy something. The stuff is so good. He's great. Have you ordered anything else? No, I'm still thinking about the Steve Berghead.

Okay. What's your name, please? Okay. I'm Ben. Ben. Where are you calling from? And what was the first call, Ben? Gainesville, Florida.

I'm 24. And I really wanted to go to a 21 pilots concert. Oh, right. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And 21, yeah. You had, we ended with a PowerPoint pitch, I believe. Yeah, my problem was my girlfriend's childhood best friend was getting married. The same day we had tickets to a 21 pilots concert.

No invitation yet, though, if. memory serves. Exactly. Yeah, you guys suggest that I make a PowerPoint, just explaining my position, treat it like Shark Tank, and then also create a song inspired by 21 pilots to convince her.

This is winning, Ben. How nice is it sometimes when you hear our pitches back now? I don't remember any, I like those pitches a lot. I do too. So, Ben, did you create the PowerPoint? Oh, I did. I did it all.

Nat Attack. Is there any way we could see? see it? Yeah, I have it ready. Great. Ben, you want to just run a PowerPoint presentation? Ben, what a handsome couple you two are. Yep. Thank you. Thank you. Yeah, let me pull it up

on my end here. It's you and me in the red, Gareth. That's them on the other side. That's your and me vibes. Sort of dirty bloody Alley boys. Yeah. Dress cool.

I love, let's just say very quickly, the uh like jake said the first picture i believe is 21 pilots as two guys who look like great musicians and then the following picture it says our 21 pilots weekend by ben and then the other picture is a very clearly a i background where ben has photoshopped him and his lady uh in front of a stage of 21 pilots it's pretty good will you be the play by play and i'll be color and you just let everybody know what they're seeing sure okay and then ben why don't you jump in if there is a particular case or point you were making at any point, but we'll try to just go through it a little quickly, if that's okay. Yeah, you take the lead. All right, so here we go. So I explained

the first one. So here we go to the next page. The next page has the plan, big letters. We've got, we've got some dots here followed by the plan. I think my favorite on this is at the pool, there's a stick figure of a woman in a little dress and a stick figure man jumping up in. Yeah, though the homework got put in there for sure. We've got great seats, quality time, fulfill your boyfriend's lifelong dream, pretzels, in parentheses, probably. Is she a pretzel fan? I mean, like, that's enough, not particularly. Nice hotel. See the best band ever, over 14 billion streams.

Then, like Jake said, we've got a hotel room. Might I point out, two beds? He went with two beds for the room. Big mistake. Not a huge. Unless you're going to have another couple in there? Yeah. Or you plan on having a big argument that night or something?

Yeah, I would say go with the one bed. One nice big bed, but he didn't do that. And then he's got, like Jake said, the pool, the stick figures. And then it shows the general admission lawn, Ben's head, his lady's head. And why did you pick the furthest away seats? Yeah, you're really pitching a low expectation of it. You're pitching pretzels, two beds, and really far from the stage. Well, like, you know, we went with lawn.

seats um just you know we're on a budget here but i think it'll still be really fun okay i would say promise promise the moon next time but okay let's say you can't promise that you can't deliver you guys i can't pull pictures of my exact hotel room it's just what they have on the website i know but ben you did two you did two beds my king it's i mean they offer picks with one king we're talking look two picks down and you're going to see one bed we are we're talking about a He don't have to go for the first pick, you see, my bet. Yeah, it's just, anyway, Ben, we're not here. Look, we're in.

We're just, we're giving notes on an event that happened. So the next page, but wait, your friend's wedding is on the same night. We love your friend. Can we go to both? New colored lettering. No, impossible. Another question. But it's a once-in-a-lifetime moment.

No, new font. Statistically, we all have a couple weddings in the U.S. And we all have a couple of weddings in us. Terrible thing to say to your girlfriend. Followed by another question, didn't we already commit to going? New color font. No, we haven't received the official invitation yet. More Photoshop.

Very stock photo of a bride walking down the aisle and then Ben's face on what looks like a lady's body. And then Ben's lady's head on another body very clearly photoshopped. But let me tell you this, Ben, you're bringing out some good points. I'm your lady right here. I'm going, everything he's saying is making sense. I also think, Jake, that there's some real charm in Ben's, uh, take on this in that he's, it's funny. It's funny. It's also, he did a lot of work. He didn't just say like, dude, can we skip it? Yes. Okay, next page. This is good, Ben. I got a feeling you're going to win here. Thank you. Thank you. All right. So we've got a pros, cons list. Let's just get the

Photoshop out of the way. There's a couple tangoing. Again, nightmare Photoshop. up. Yeah, but good job, Ben. This is going to get a laugh from her. Ben's head on a professional dancer's body, the same with his lady. You can actually even see a little bit of the previous head's hair. You know what I just realized you would love to do, Gareth, dancing with the stars. Let me think on that for a minute.

At the end of this page, I'm going to give you an answer, but I think... We all know the answer. I can see it. All right. You would love the outfits. You would love the attention of doing all the dances. It's, if I may, it's the pageantry. Pros of the wedding.

We'll celebrate, we'll get to celebrate your friend. We'll get to dance. Cake. Great pros of a wedding. Cons of the wedding. Hold on. Way to be fair, brother. Yeah.

Fair. Okay. I like that. That is. We get to celebrate friend. We'll get to dance. Cake. Those are pro.

That's what a wedding is. And in the presentation in the video, I did sort of point out, like, we'll also get to dance at the concert, you know, like. That's fair. True. Well, let's get to the convent. of the wedding expensive frowny face uh we don't know what music i'll be playing fair and then the another con of the wedding and i like this con because it's really not a con of the wedding it's just

missing out on the concert of a lifetime hey first of all i just need to say this ben we're on page four of seven you're doing an excellent job yeah you've really done well i'm very excited to hear how this goes uh okay and then we get to the my opinion page which great to be fair i believe the whole thing was an op-ed but here we go um we haven't committed to going to the wedding yet no we have committed to go into the concert yep uh this is an equation actually we haven't committed to go to the wedding yet plus we have committed to go into the concert plus skipping the wedding means we'll have extra income freed up for the souvenirs pretzels etc they're the pretzels again equals skip your best friend's wedding to go to 21 pilots interesting good push good final statement

All right, six. Jake. Excellent, Ben. The best Photoshop of the evening, I do believe Ben's head is on, well, he's on a shark's body. I think it might be the guy who does kind bars. Oh, right, right, right.

Whose body is that, Ben? I believe this is Mark Cuban. Oh, it is. So then on the last page, he references a shark tank. So sharks, do we have a deal? We see the Shark Tank logo. All of this will be on the website.

And there's definitely some audio was playing here. And then one more picture, 21 pilots. It's Ben labeled me as one of the guys in the band handing a jacket to the other guy in the band that says you. And the tear in my weekend plans. Okay. Is what it says, which might be an inside joke. I don't know. Are you guys ready for the song?

Yeah, we're right. So then, hold on, Ben. And so you did all this, and then you played a song after, yeah? Yeah, so this is a song inspired from 21 pilots, but from my heart, the original song is called Tair in My Heart. Okay. That's where the title's from. Tair in my plans. Yeah, it was us.

I sprung this all on her as soon as she walked in the door. I had her sit on the couch. Sneak attack. We're wearing a full suit. And then we just listened to this together. Big Ben, you were wearing a full suit? Oh, yeah. First time you saw me in a suit.

That's cool. Good for you. Checks that wedding box, too. All right, well, we've got the song. Let's dance. Uh-huh. Happy! Sometimes you got a bail to know.

Sometimes you got a bail to know. A wedding is not the way to go. But it takes 21. pilots to show you how we've got two long seats I'm alive get some soft pretzels I'm on fire my favorite bin take me higher than I've ever been the songs out the wedding are okay but my taste in music's on the stage and it takes a power point to show you How? We've got two one seats.

I'm alive. Get you some soft pretzels. I'm on fire. They're my favorite thing. Take me higher. Than I've ever been. Then I've been. Then I've ever been.

Than I've ever been. Awesome. There's a 22nd pilot. Hey, Ben. Awesome. Awesome. Ben, awesome. I think that's going to be a theme song for the show for a while.

That's a killer tune. That's a killer tune. Like we're record execs. That's right in the zone, man. What's great is very charming. Your personality came across. But look, you didn't have to sell us. We're in.

these sharks are biting i'm definitely more in now oh yeah never been more in same uh but ben the question is how did she react what was her first reaction walk us through that and then maybe at the end let us know what happened are we ringing a bell or are we going to a wedding oh you can ring the bell she was she was cracking up the entire time and then you know after we sat in it for a bit and you like watched it again get, or we, you know, listen to the song a couple times, you know, she said I had a really valid argument. She said, she liked the humor.

She liked the effort I put into this presentation. She said the song really showed her how important this was to me. So, yeah, we're going to the concert. Unbelievable, Ben. The official invite came through two days after I gave for this presentation. Right. A lot of wire. Good work.

And so what did she say? I unfortunately am going to a concert. We have plans we can't get out of. That's what we said. Oh, oh, mama me, Papa Pia. What a victory. This is awesome. This is shocking.

I'm shocked. I'm happy, Ben. I am too. And it says a lot about her. That's great. I do too. I like her a lot. I've caught her singing my version of the song, like, you know, in the car.

Wow. Holy shit. I have one more update. So she's not technically my girlfriend anymore. We actually got engaged a week ago, so she's now like to know on track. Whoa. Wow. If it went the other way, I was going to be really disappointed.

I don't think you guys had a hand in that. That might have been unrelated, but I wanted to share. I think we did. It's big news. It's big news. I think we did. Now, make sure when you get married to be very, very clear on the 21. pilot's touring schedule, because the last thing you want to do is have to do one of these for

your own wedding or something like that. But this is amazing, Ben. And I did, I ended up telling her I came on the podcast. Can we listen to this sometime together? And I told her, Jake, you had the idea of, like, getting a video from the band to convince her. And her first, her first thought was like, why didn't you have Jake record a video convincing me?

Because she's the biggest new girl fan on the planet. And I was like, I didn't think of that. Yeah, we didn't think of that. I know. Well, but to be fair, this is a better play, man. Yeah, that's a nice Hail Mary if we have to go in. But here's all that would do is she'd go like, oh my God, but that does nothing do with you, Ben. I agree.

This is a Ben play. This is the growth came out of Ben. The wind came from you, Ben. And you really did knock it out of the park. We're dealing with another page here, Jake. I agree. But also, Ben, I think this sets a new thing. You're about to get married.

My guess is you're probably going to. knock off some kids. And you know what happens in life, Ben? And I'm going to say this as an older guy. I'm around Gareth stage. Lo me. We're right around the same age. Is, same age.

I can't answer it. So can Andy Richter. So what? Is this, Ben. There's going to be a lot of arguments. There's going to be a lot of disagreements. always do the PowerPoints. You have set a standard when your first child goes like,

can I go to a sleepover? And your wife goes, seven's too young. Say to he or her do a PowerPoint. I really like that pitch as, since it was effective, this is a two-way street. A week later, they get engaged? I like that. Yeah, come on, we did that.

A week later, and it didn't have anything to do with us? We did that. What, are we sitting here with a couple of chimp heads? in our frames or not? I don't think, well, I still think it came from us. It's got a lot to do with it. Yes, I agree. So, Ben, what do you think about you guys become the PowerPoint couple?

I think we're already there. I think this is set a precedent. I love it. I think it's the best form of discourse. I think if we all made more PowerPoint, we'd be happier in the world. And what is your fiancé's name? Allison. Allison, I want to say this, is Jake John.

The guy from New Girl, a show that you like. You are making the right call by going to this concert. And I don't need to convince you because you've already been convinced. But here's something I'll pitch to you. My brother, Dan Johnson, married me, my wife. He married our friend Jonathan Musserlian, his wife. And he married somebody else who at the moment I can't remember. If you are looking for the best efficient in the game,

and I'm not kidding when I said, a guy who takes it seriously, Ouse's charm is a load of fun. I got a guy who can marry you, too. There we go. That's an offer. That's a show offer. And by the way, I'll just... That goes for anybody in the audience. I'll go sign. Maybe not anybody, because I'm sure he's not going to travel.

Dan is the real deal. Yeah, but if you're looking to have a, we're here to help touch at your wedding, I'm telling you, he takes it seriously, and he is, he married me? he brought down the house tears were everywhere well excuse me while i get my hand on the bell for a moment okay ben anything else my friend no that's everything i owe the concert to you guys and like maybe i need to make a powerpoint to uh talk you into having your brother marry us by the way do it and ben if you want i'll connect you to my brother a little bit but a powerpoint of that could be a really fun follow-up.

And if she says, no, that's fair. I agree. But you want to do a PowerPoint to connect Dan to maybe... Where are you guys? What state? Florida. Florida. Well, you know, it's possible.

Even if not, it's great for the show. Well, here's what could be really funny, Gareth. If my brother officiates it, what if we went? Well, you know, it's funny. When I picked up some of the... We're here to help Birch, Leah also put in there some... mail and you have been invited to a few weddings and I should point out I have not been these invitations were explicitly for you why are you taking my mail you little rat yeah I'm sorry

I figured you'd really want to go to those uh the way you should show up I was thinking there's something to the idea of me showing up in your stead as your or I will say this if Dan officiates a wedding we're going to try our hardest to bring I agree you me Steve Eric bring the crowd out. Maybe we'll just sit, Steve and Eric. Either way, Ben, congratulations. And let us know how the concert goes, but this is awesome. Awesome.

And way to go. You did awesome. You really crushed it, my friend. Yeah, you did. Thank you. Thank you so much for the help. All right, but. Hey, Jake and Gareth.

It's Jen from Jenny and Benny's Pickles. Just wanted to give a quick little update since our last time we talked. And I actually did end up reaching out to our pickle nemesis. We spoke on the phone, and I did actually bring up the copping situation, whether it is deliberate or not, and he knew exactly what I was talking about, so I'm glad I'm not going crazy, and I wasn't imagining it, but he was very nice. Other than that, he's actually also a researcher, so it's crazy that we also have the same job. But anyways, I brought up the idea of a friendly pickle face off and thought it was just a great way to serve some good competition, boost some business for just both me and him. but also the farmer's market in general, and he unfortunately declined. So I think he's a little scared, just saying, which he has a good reason to be.

But anyways, again, we had a very good season. We're very excited to do our loyalty cards that you guys suggested. Thank you again for helping me with my problem. Again, if anyone wants to try the pickles, we will be at the Walpole Farmers Market on September 27th from 9 a.m. to 1 p.m. and follow us on Instagram at Jenny Benny underscore Pickles. Thank you guys again.

We're Here to Help is hosted by J.G Johnson and Gareth Reynolds. If you'd like to be on the show, please email us your question at helpful pod at gmail.com. And if you want to watch video episodes of We're Here to Help, you can go to our Patreon at patreon.com slash here to help pod to see our entire catalog. We're Here to Help is produced by Rabbit Grimm Productions, Executive producers Rob Hollis, Jeff Porter, and Natalie Hollis,

Associate producer Jesse Thurston, editing mix and master by Chris Fowler. The theme song by Oliver Raleigh. The cover artwork is by James Fostike, animations by Andrew Strelecky. And if you'd like to see Gareth, you stand up on the road, go to Gareth Reynolds.com. Remember all of the advice given on we're here to help is for entertainment purposes only, and all listeners should be adults and make their own decisions. All video episodes of season one are,

available now on Patreon, and season two video episodes will be available every Monday starting January 20th. Go to patreon.com forward slash here to help pod. I'm Tignotaro. I'm May Martin. And I'm Fortune Feemster. And together, we're handsome. What is handsome? Well, it's a state of mind. It's how you feel. It's whatever you want it to be. Hansom is also a podcast hosted by us, three stand-up comedians you may have seen on your TV. We swap stories, share life updates, and occasionally, laugh until we cry. Every episode we answer a question from a celebrity friend, people like Sarah Silverman. It's Stephen Colbert. It's Reese Witherspoon. My name is Mindy Kaling. Hello, Hanson podcast. It's Jen Aniston here. You gorgeous, devil you. So if you're looking for a positive,

joyful show guaranteed to make you giggle, check out Handsome. Jump right in with whatever episode tiggles your fancy or start from the very first episode. Listen to Handsome on your favorite podcast app or watch full video episodes on YouTube, new episodes every Tuesday and Friday. And don't forget, keep it handsome.