We're Here to Help - 240: Looks 61, Feels 51 & Tight Little Bottoms, Tight Little Top

Episode Date: December 15, 2025

Jake and Gareth protect the sanctity of a little free library. Then, they help a circus artist outdo her brother at Christmas. Plus, Andy Roddick stops by for a follow-up to Ep 213 "Trash Hole Shark."See images from the episode here: http://www.heretohelppod.com/post/episode-240Want to call in? Email your question to [e-mail]: https://patreon.com/heretohelppodMERCH: heretohelppod.comINSTAGRAM: @HereToHelpPodIf you’re enjoying the show, make sure to rate We’re Here to Help 5-Stars on Apple Podcasts.Advertise on We’re Here to Help via Gumball.fmSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Hey, we're heredos. The Steve Berg-2020 calendar is here. Well, almost. It will be available for order on December 3rd at 12 p.m. Eastern Standard Time. We are doing a limited run of 500 calendars, so get yours while you can. All orders will ship December 9th, just in time for the holidays. Visit www.com.com to order. And we're here, we're back. And we are back. Garfan, I just went to Catalina. And? Loved it. And thought about our group a lot there. It was the perfect place for the...

The we're here to help if there was ever like the, remember the Beatles movie and the monkeys really of the monkey show where they live? Yep. The We're Here to Help group all lives on Catalina Island. The weird here to help has their own little area. Good. That's important. 88% of the island is untouched.

It's conservatory. Everybody else is only on 12%. There's no cars. There's all golf cars. Everybody's just, all I did the whole time I get there, You can walk from where the ferry drops you off to all the hotels in town. I love that.

Dude, there's no cars. Golf carts. That's the best. Mini little golf cart parking areas. So what, would you just rent one? Yeah, so at our Airbnb, part of the Airbnb's is you get a golf cart. We went ziplining,

we went kayaking in the ocean. How many days were in it? I think four or five. That's perfect. For Thanksgiving dinner, went to this place called the Avaline Grill where they did a whole Thanksgiving. It was delicious. I could not have liked it more. And I had that realization while I was there that I was like, this is a place that feels like where I belong.

But more so, I can't believe Steve and Eric don't live there. I can't believe Eric isn't the mayor. They have wild, they have bison. There's literal bison that they have a bison. But they had a western movie they made back in the mayor. the day and they brought in bison for the scene then the bison didn't listen they just ran wild so the guy said to rigley from rigley field the rigley family who owns the island he goes these bison just escape what should we do and rigley goes leave him for tour so rigley the rigley's own

the island so you went to a rigley owned island the chicago cubs from the twenties of the 50s used to do spring training on catalina oh my god so even for you this is extra Well, I went there years ago with Krocco. Uh-huh. So he knew all this stuff. When I first moved to L.A., my brother was reminding me. I didn't remember, but I told my brother, I was like, I'm in Catalina, and he goes, I think we went there together. And I was like, right, we did.

But it's really connected to the Cubs and Wrigley and Chicago. It is, I didn't like it, Gareth. I loved it. It doesn't feel like a real world. All the houses are many. If it had a chimp sanctuary on that island That's where you come in. That's where you come in.

The Jake Johnson Chimp House. By the way. Come on. I think I just realized my calling in my later half of life, chimp sanctuaries. Dude, seriously. We need them. We need them.

These fucking people are raising chimps like kids and getting sick of them. Well, what happens to bubbles? Again, you're going very specific with bubbles because you do know the ends and out to the bubble story, but there's a lot of other bubble stories that are, you know,

NIM the Chimp, there's a lot of those. If anybody wants to get into the Chimp Sanctuary game, I want to get into it. Come on. I want to start to, I will do my Jerry Lewis telethons

raising money for him. Just you out there. All right, bring out gumball. Gumball's a beautiful capuchin. Look at this, son of a bitch. Look at this. Oh, my God. Look at the nuts on this guy.

This chimp over here can paint. Look at that, son of a bitch. Look at that one. He's wildly. That art's not really good, but he's a chimp. What do you want? Come on, keep calling, everybody. That's a good-looking chimp over there.

That's a good chimp. Is that a boy or a girl? Then this cream goes black. The host had too much. The little color bars come on that they come back. Hey, all right. Look, I got some directorial correction. We got a lot of beautiful chimps.

But this is a tree. Shoutout to Catalina. I would love to go there. You got to go. You just take a ferry out there? Yes, I was thinking while I was out there, how fun. I just don't think it's right, but that's where we should do a live show. Why not?

I just think it's too much of a pain in the butt for audiences to come. Well, but whatever. You're listening to be out there for your chimp work anyway. Like the idea of only doing live shows on weird islands. 18 people are like, wait, what is this? I don't know the show. Okay, does anyone have a problem? I have an issue with the show.

Not on this island. It's paradise. One thing I do need to say about tours, my family and I, now that I have kids, on vacations, we do a lot of tour things, or we'll go on like kayaking or ziplining or a, you know, in Alaska when we did that movie, like you go look at whales, you do whatever.

One woman admitted that in their contract, they have to talk the entire. your time. So if you've ever been on a tour, the person's always talking. It's horrible, too. There's a lot of filler. But we were in Denali.

We went on a seven-hour bus ride into Denali and back. At one person, at one point, the woman was talking. Gareth, she was literally just words. She was like, well, at that point, there is rainfall. And then she went like, well, the reality of rain is rain comes from the sky, hits the ground, creates puddles. puddles, animals, bounce in, then dries, and I'm like, this is nonsense.

No, shut up. But I think there's something, and if anybody has been a tour guide and knows that that's part of their training and the policy, I want to get to the bottom of it, because there is just straight up, there can be silence. I've been on tours, I was on a waterfall tour in Iceland, and I put in AirPods, and I was like, I can't do this. But it's so, like, I get the information. It's clear.

There's a lot to give out, but it doesn't need to be a constant stream. I'm not against 15 minutes of silence. Yeah. No. Neither's the tour guy. Everybody wants it, but I think there's a policy

in whoever is running this that goes, hey, they're paying good money for this, fill their ears with garbage. And if anybody has been a tour guy, you know who's going to push back on your theory? Eric? 100%. Brother, let them talk.

God, you're a grump. I've learned more nonsense from tour guys. Everybody enjoy the show. And we are brought to you by Armrah. What happens when your health becomes the punchline? From seed oils to stress, toxins to pollutants, the modern world is screwing with our health at the cellular level, leading to sluggishness, bloating, accelerated aging,

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Hello. Call her. Hi. Hi. How are you? I'm good. How are you guys? Good.

What's your name, please? My name is Kate. Hi, Kate. Where are you calling from, Kate? The greater Boston area. Sure. Boston. Beautiful.

Gareth went to Emerson. Sure did. I wrote that tea. Wait, who went to Emerson? I did. Gareth. Oh, nice. Yeah.

Wait, so did you grow up over here? No, I grew up in Wisconsin. But I went there. I was in Boston for five years. I read the tea. How much the tea cost now? Um, God. Honestly, I try to avoid it at all costs, to be honest with you.

Great. Well, that's interesting. Yeah. All right, Kate. You got Jake. You got Gary. What is, what's going on? What can we help you with? All right. So I have a little free library on my front yard.

I love that. You guys. Same. Yeah. Oh, yeah. One across the street. Yep. Nice. So lots of kids in the neighborhood. And so obviously there's kids books in there. And there's a letter that we seem to get pretty frequently. Have you guys seen it or should I read it to you? Are we, Gareth and I have not seen it. Yeah, read it.

I have it if you guys want to look at it. Sure. No, let's have Kate read it. Okay. Okay. All right. So single white Catholic man, 71. Look, 61, feels 51, 55, 160 pounds, gentle, peaceful, dependable, polite, honest, devoted, organized, clean, fair,

not greedy and wasteful, very romantic and very patient, but still speaking, a very strong, single white Catholic woman, 40 to 50, 5-6-6-6-5, 200 to 300 pounds. What? To go hiking, hold on, I can't go hiking, camping, and boating with on small, gentle rivers. Holy shit. I also love to play my electric guitar with my oldies music in my office and my house. Holy shit.

My favorite movies are of expeditions in the Amazon jungle with Amazon Women. And of Amazon women, bodybuilders who are heroin, please call me. I'm assuming I could say his name because he's definitely not the like a lot of them. Yeah. Holy shit. Please call me Joe at Blank or please mail a letter to me too and then this town

Bridgewater okay I'll just say that please include your home address as neatly as you can so that I can write back to you as soon as I can and then in all caps written very aggressively it says if you're the right one

for me I'll treat you like a queen underlined exclamation point Holy shit, Kate. That's incredible. That was left in the little library thing? Yes, multiple times. Same letter.

Same letter. The writing's also wild. It's unhinged. It's unhinged. First of all, first thing, Kate, be careful. We got to be very careful on this one. Because all my uncles told me that. This is a weird dude.

I'll be honest. It's the taking the woman out on the boat is where I got a little, ooh. I would say everything. Well, that's where I go, murder. I don't think it's murder. I just think it's a super weird dude. The parameters. Whatever we do in this solution, we got to keep it very anonymous and keep this guy away from you.

I mean, he wants a WNBA player. Okay. So, right? He wants a 300 pound. He wants a 300 pounds, 6,5 woman from an Amazon woman. Who's white? Yeah, yeah. Who's also like 30 years younger than him.

Did he say white? Anyway, he did say white. Yes, he said white Catholic. I mean, Boston. A white Catholic Amazon women. Yes. Like, Catholic guys, but I don't know. Holy cow.

All right, Kate. So this is as wild of a setup as we've had in a while. What's the question? Okay, so one more piece of information, just so you guys see where this is coming from. The address he gives, I like put it into Google, and it's at least like 35 minute drive for me. So he doesn't live in my neighborhood. It's not a neighbor. Like this is some guy who must go to multiple little free libraries and use them as his like geriatric e-harmonie or something.

Hold on. You know what, Natalie? Didn't ring reach out to us? Ring? One of these companies that does surveillance reached out, I can find it on the email saying if we ever needed products they could send them. This feels like we need to put a camera in the box

and see the old guy. You want to get eyes on. he did get a reach out from ring right yeah because i remember they were reaching out and they were trying to schedule a call and then i never did it so what what if we get eyes on him then what i don't i don't know i mean i agree that it satisfies this just base curiosity of what are we dealing with 35 minutes away to leave this insane no hey did we get kate's question did we get the actual yeah sorry how do i gain weight so that he wants me where do i find this woman?

How do I gain 150 pounds in two weeks? Can I be stretched long? Oh my God. Yeah, I just need this to stop happening because it's kind of, it's kind of creepy. It is creepy. There's so many kids to be finding this in my mailbox.

You know what I mean? I think that's exactly right. Well, then the ring pitch isn't bad because that shows sort of like, hey, we're keeping an eye on this box a little bit more. He's 71. He's not even going to know what that is. It's like a little robot in the corner.

I know. So, I mean, my husband and I talked about that originally, like when the first one came, we're like, should we put a little camera there? I'm thinking that might deter people from taking and leaving a book. I don't want my children on a little camera as they take little books out of a free library. That's so. You don't want my kids near that 71 year old weirdo. I don't want people putting books in my dating box.

I think we have to nudge him. We have to nudge him to leave the notes elsewhere. Yes, I think that's exactly right. I think this might have to be, here's the first beginning of a pitch, a note on top of the thing that says, this is not a dating box. no personal notes this is a library and not a dating box

I think that's pretty good for a start I mean I something like that like a box disclaimer that is just like or put a note that says there are no two to 300 pound white Amazon women here stop leaving notes you are looking for a unicorn your or your queen is not here go to a different dating box Okay Okay

Only he would know Your queen is not here Please don't leave any more letters How often is this I also don't want him to like Bang on my door and be like Did you leave this note or something? I agree with that

I don't want to communicate this creepy guy How often is this showing up? Like how often does this happen? Um So we've had two so far, and I'm just expecting more because they're all written the same way. And so the first one I want to say was September. I know. Just imagine this, some old guy going, I got an idea.

Yeah, oh, it's just lunacy. I'm looking for my queen. I mean, he clearly doesn't have any grandkids to, like, put him online and get him on a dating app or something. How do I find a queen? I'm looking for a big Amazon woman. Natalie, just bring it up again. Jake, you can keep talking. I just kind of want to read it again

just because it is a shocking. I thought someone was fucking with me. Like the first time I got it. Yeah. My husband brought it in and I was like, no, you wrote this. You want to you wrote this. Like, come on. He's five.

He was like, no, I swear to got it. He's a little guy. He's five, five. And he wants a woman who's Catholic? White, 40 to 50, 5-6-to-6-5. To 6-5. Two to 300 pounds. He weighs, he wants a woman.

He's 5-5. He's looking for a 6-5 woman. He weighs a... He wants to get dominated in the paint, Jake. He's looking to get... He wants to get rocked out. He wants to go hiking, camping, get boxed out, get dominated in the bedroom. He said...

But what does that even mean? 71 looks 61. Says who? Feels 51. Fields 51 is a really... That is by far the weirdest part. Wow. And he loves to play that electric guitar.

So let's see the second page. My favorite movies are expeditions in the Amazon jungle with Amazon women. And Amazon women bodybuilders who are, hey, that's a wild line. I know at first I thought, this is kind of sweet, sort of. And then I flip it over and it becomes like his kink. Yeah. You know what reminds me of is our crumb. You remember that comic?

Oh, my God. And all R. Crumb liked were these huge Amazon women who would, like, squash this little creep in between their legs. He's the guy, you know what you should do? Leave an R. Crum comic in there. Too vague. I think you'd have to... Look, there's some...

With the letter in the comic. In the back of my mind, like, we have his number, but we obviously don't want to engage. I think a specific letter to Joe... We have his number. On the box. We have his number. Are you trying to call him, Gary?

Are you trying to call him? I mean, well, how fucking crazy we want to get. Eric would call him. Eric would turn it and go like, hey, brother. He's a hell of a guy. And then he and I would text fight for a year about he would go, he's no different than us. He's a good guy.

And then I go, Eric, we're getting confused. Joe's coming to town. He's not our friend. We're going to go. Go see ZZ Top. Oh, yeah, he's such a fucking weirdo. You're telling me you don't want to get dominated in the paint. What?

I don't even know what we're arguing about. Eric, the friending, Joe. I don't want you calling him, Gareth, because I don't want him linked to you. I think this guy might be nutty. I could star 6'7. That'll block the number. Yeah? Yep. Can do it right now.

Do it. I mean, well, we got to get the sign off. Kate, what do you think? I mean, if you stars in seven, sure, but who knows if they'll even answer. Yeah, he might not answer. I could also leave a message. I think leave a message. What are you going to say?

Hey, Joe, I, um, you left one of your notes at a place in my neighborhood that I think is a little inappropriate. So I just want to let you know. I really hope you find. No, do it as an Amazon woman and go, you're six foot five, five pounds and you're tired of these notes. If he's looking for, go, you know where. to find me. I'm coming for you. Don't leave that house again. Don't you go in another library. I'm coming to your

house. Don't you go there again, you little gentle boy. I think that's you. You do that one. The other thing is, we could leave something like a letter at his place just being like, don't do this. With so much information

about the guy. We could send him an anonymous note. Yeah. sane. I mean, we could catfish him. No. Yeah, so my friend already tried that. So that didn't work.

Well, she tried to text him. And I was like, he's 71. He probably doesn't know how to text. Well, he feels 51. Yeah, I mean. That's true. It looks 60 when he feels 51. He texts like a 30-year-old.

She made up a whole character. Her name was like Patty or something. And she's a 300-pound one. woman who likes boating. I'm a 300. And what happened? He didn't write back? He just never answered.

Okay. Here's my thought. Kate, what's your thought, actually? What do you think is the best move here? Because you've gone down some roads. Yeah, honestly, I have no idea what to do because after the first one, I was like, okay, no response. hopefully he'll just not do this again. And then he obviously did.

So I don't, honestly, I don't know. That's why I'm calling you guys. I can try the letter at the top of the mailbox or something. Oh, you know what you could do? You could, what if you laminated the letter and put it on top and said, whoever wrote this, don't do it again. this is not the place for love letters I also think if you just had almost a disclaimer

like a laminated disclaimer on the box that said go ahead what if you put in an envelope a note that you taped that said what's the guy's name again Joe yeah what if you wrote to Joe and he opened it and you said no bad blood or bad feelings but this is not the place to look for a date.

This is a library for neighborhood kids. Good luck in your search. Maybe check the internet. Okay. Right? So it's not me. And then it's not,

and then if he knocked on your door, you know nothing of it. Right. And it's a community thing. Hopefully he just takes it. So it just goes to Joe and it's, you know. And then it's typed up or hands.

written that just says thank you for your notes but this is not the place to look for love this is a book swap what how the fuck did you even get at a book swap is you swap books you meet women search for amazon women you look for big women i know how these work if you're looking for big amazon women perhaps you should look online i'm sure there are sites for that That's where you get books. But this isn't where that's done. This is a love box. All the best.

And then write, The Neighborhood. The Neighborhood. Okay. What do you think of that? I'm going to do that. I'm going to do that. But I still want to hear you call him and pretend to be an Amazon woman. Sure.

We can do both. I don't want to do the prank, Agarra. I don't want to call him. All right. I don't need this. We had enough nonsense with the Dick Van Dyke stuff. I don't think we need to... Not sense to you.

Winning content. And our audience. It was our lowest rated episode ever. But those who tuned in, Jake, are on... I'll tell you, anecdotally, I hear a lot of... Now I'll have to go back and check that one out. Oh, my God. So you didn't listen, huh?

I don't even... I don't recognize that one. Kate's just... It's not worth it. Well, it's kind of a Joey. It's kind of a little. bit of a joish episode one question for you kate how did you find this show um i think my so when the first episode dropped my aunt put me on to it okay a while ago and yeah and um

and then we've been listening to it since like we'll just text each other about it and um listen to it on our commutes and stuff but she actually ended up going to garris stand up in Rhode Island. And she bought like a bunch of tickets trying to get everybody to go there. But it was like a Thursday night or something in Rhode Island and all of us live near Boston. So nobody went.

It was just I know. It was just her at the table in the front. And I guess you roasted her for like 10 minutes. Oh, I kind of remember this a little bit. You really? Kind of, yeah. I remember. She was sitting a lot. I think I got her like a couple

cocktails because she was I was like, yep, it's just me. And I was like, you want another drink? Yes. So glad you asked me because she wanted me to bring it up. She's the best. Let me ask you this. While we're off subject a little bit, Kate,

when you got this note, did part of you get happy because you were like, I could call the show? No, I didn't even think about it until recently. It's perfect for us. The second one, I was like, yeah, it's so funny. After the second, I was like, okay, this is so weird. Like, I really don't know what to do now.

And then it just, like, dawned on me randomly. Oh, my God, I can call the show. Let's do this. Let's start writing the letter. You got a piece of paper. Let's do it together as a team. Okay. Tell us when you're ready.

And then if we pitch something, you don't like it, don't write it. Yep. Push back. Okay. G.R. you want to start us? Sure. Yep, I'm ready. Dear Joe,

please stop putting letters in this box. This is a book exchange. This is not a love box. Please stop putting letters in this box. This is a book exchange. if you are looking for love perhaps check the internet there are many sites for that

and you'll save money on gas oh my god but this underlined is to exchange books for people who live in this community thank you for

understanding, good luck on your search. Signed the community. The community. Or sign the name of your town police. Oh, I don't know. I don't think you want police because it then makes, it's already a weird thing to put there. So I think you want to keep it.

The community makes it feel like it's... But the next one, Kate, we're going to. We're contacting the authorities. The next one, I think we reach out to ring. Yeah. Yeah, but then I would have to, like, maybe put it on my house just in the general direction of the library. Yeah.

That's true. We can get there next. We'll figure that out next. I think this is going to work. Because I think he's going to see it and go like that. I'll tell you what. I'll tell you what. You want to get crazy.

Yeah, we do. You want to get crazy. We accept options for Joe's date And we reach out to Joe And we said We just do one We don't do all things But we just see if we get one email

So let's do this Hold on, let's do this Will you pull the letter up again This is for the community now If there's anybody out there that is looking for a single white Catholic man who's 71. He looks 61, but he feels 51. He's 5 foot 5.

He weighs 160 pounds. He's gentle. He's peaceful. He's dependable. He's polite. He's honest, devoted, organized, clean, fair, not greedy. He's not greedy and wasteful. He's very romantic and he's very patient.

If you're looking for that, and you happen to be a strong, single, white Catholic woman, between 40 and 50. You cannot be 51, you cannot be 39. If you are between 5, 6, you must be taller than him. And 6, 5. You have to weigh between 200 and 300. If you're 198, don't email in. Or just eat a lot.

But I'm not talking about in my boots on 200. No. We need a real... You're a nude 200. If you're 301, You're out. And you need to like hiking. Camping, boating,

on a small, gentle river. Grammar's not something that matters to you. You need to like boating on small, gentle rivers. And you need to like an old-timer who likes to play electric guitar. He can do it in his office if that's a problem for you. Or his house. It is in his house. Oh, that's bad news.

He does like movies, but that has nothing to do. you about fine who cares what he likes now listen if you're interested contact the show we'll try to hook you up and if you're interested in being treated like a queen jake can't stress that enough now if this is you and you're truly interested and you live in the bridgewater mass can you imagine leaving your address for this guy like being like yeah that's one of my first thoughts It was like, we live in a world where men can, like, literally write this and leave it anywhere and feel perfectly safe. Well, it's because, Kate, he's not right.

Let's not lump him into the category of just men. And by the way, if you do reach out. I'm not going in the direction of we live in a world where men can do this. He is not men. He is Joe. By the way, if you do reach out to the show, there is a lot of papers we're going to have to go through that you're going to have to sign. to agree we are nowhere near legally involved in your decision to go meet Joe, who once again feels 51.

All right. So now in terms of the letter, Kate, will you read back what we got? Yep. Dear Joe, please stop putting letters in this box. This is a book exchange. If you are looking for love, perhaps try the Internet, but this is for people who live in this community. Thanks.

Rockland I think it's pretty good I think this is for people who live in this community underline who want to exchange books okay who want to exchange books because he might go

oh if I moved to the community can I put a love letter in there no he moves well now I live in the community is there an Amazon woman here no so then thanks

the neighborhood committee oh I don't hate that oh okay where he goes like there's a gavel committee Oh shit How's that sound That sounds good

Will you send us a photo Put it in an envelope And put his name on it And you should lick it closed I don't want some random kid opening it Here's what I think I think you should just laminate it And put it on like a little above the box higher up

Because I think like someone will just take it Like, if I saw that, I'd be like, I'll take this. Why would you just steal it? It's so weird. Scandalous. You're such a Joe. How, excuse me, Kate. Let me talk to Jake for a minute.

You are such a Joe. I would just steal it. How dare you? Nobody else agrees with you. It is. There's nothing two people on the call. Natalie, stay muted. So, Kate, will you, are you going to put it above or put it in the envelope?

How do you want to do it? So I'm probably going to put it inside the library in an envelope, just because of weather. And then hopefully child doesn't take it or something, a teenager. Hey. Or Gareth. You know, a teenager like Gareth. Yeah. I don't need to take it.

I've seen it. I'm happy with where I'm at. And then will you take a photo of the letter and then send us that letter and then take a photo of it in the box, too? Yeah. So we just see what it looks like. I think that would be fun. And then, I mean, we have to have enough. update as far as if it gets taken.

Yeah. Oh, great. And if it stops. Oh, my God. Yeah. Yeah. All right. It will definitely update you guys.

And also, if anybody's actually interested, do not email in unless you fit all that stuff. I'm not looking for somebody calling it, like, similar to our dating game where we go must like golf and they go like, I've never played golf. I like the show. We're not looking for, you got to fit all those things. If you do and we can get proof of it, fuck, man. We'll set you up with Joe.

I'll call Joe personally. They need a chaperone. Hey, big daddy. We found somebody for you. You got to meet in a public park. Meet at a police station in a lobby. There will be a sniper on site. Kate, follow up with us, okay?

Thank you, Kate. Yeah, I will. Thank you. Bye. And we were brought to you by Mint Mobile. You know, you don't have to let big wireless and your overpriced phone bill suck the joy out of the holidays this year. Because right now, all of Mint Mobile's unlimited plans are 50% off.

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Thank you. Hi. Hi, can I get your name, please? I'm T-T-T. Say it again? T-T, two capital T-T. T-T. And T-T, where are you calling from?

I'm in Oakland, California. Nice. T.T. from Oakland, what's your age range? What are we talking about? How old is T.T. We're talking, 40s. That a girl. T.T. 40s. Are you from Oakland or did you move to Oakland? I moved to Oakland, but I've been here a long time, about 15 years. 15 años in Oakland. And where are you from originally? I was born in Sacramento. Oh, so this is our second Sacramento of the day.

Oh, nice. And T. T.T. What's your sign? I'm a Libra. And what does that mean to you? Well, Libras are very well-balanced. We're the scales. People like us. We're kind of everybody's friends, I would say. That's cool.

You write some of that down, Jake? I did. Well-balanced, scales, likable. Scales. Yeah. Hey, T.J. What can we do for you today? What can we do for you?

You well-balanced, likable person? Well, actually, that was a good question to ask first, being that I'm well-balanced and likable, because my brother, my oldest brother, decided it would be hilarious several years ago to start making me homemade weapons for Christmas. Fuck yeah Jesus Christ It's a good thing You're going to get

Both sides of this coin Yeah Eric Anseline Wants this all to buy illegal switchblades He sent a link Well These are homemade

Homemade How do you make a homemade Like a shit? He's making shit Yeah what is he He's making like prison contraband Okay So the very first one

Was a Molotov's mocktail What Yeah What is This dude's a legend He's hilarious And they've gotten more creative Over the years

Last year He made a weapon with I think it was 50 Kuna Kahn Tom Those things Those suckers are sharp DZ you got any picks of these weapons I sent one

I sent my favorite one in He he made Well, so this one wasn't exactly made But he gave me a machete Sure did But he beated He beated the machete

With beads that have letters on them And he put a really pretty scarf on it It badass What does it say? T.T. Badass Motherfucking circus chick This dude's awesome What's your brother's name?

Paul You know what this reminds me of Gareth, my friend Nick Poole, the guy from Win It All with the long black hair, remember I told you about him? Nick would do something like this, where you just get weird weapons. He wasn't even an actor. No, and he's so good in that. All right, so Paul's making you cool weapons for holidays.

It just started out of the blue. It's random, but now he's into it. I got to say, great idea for gifts, just weird weapons. I will say the timing is really fun. Eric, literally, the group text thing with you, me, Berg, and Gareth has been on fire. Oh, just. The four of us have been texting.

And lately, Eric has a link to illegal switchblades that he wants us all to buy because if you get stuck in water in your car, you can break yourself out of it. And I don't think we should all buy illegal switchblades. Especially not for that. The amount of there's so many commercials where it's like, what if your car went in a river? You'd be like, yeah, it's not ideal. I don't know if it's by a weapon, not ideal. I don't think I need a knife in my pocket.

I don't think I need to have a knife for a window. But yeah, he's bragging about these switchblades anyway. But his new nickname is Switchblade. So if anybody sees Eric out on the streets, call him Switchblade. So T.T. back to you. Yeah. So Paul sends you weapons and keep going. Well, we open them.

It's very important that I open them in front of family. Sure. Because that's part of the presentation. He's got to show off his creativity skills. I get that. I get that too. So it's a whole thing. Everyone anticipates it every year.

And so this year, apparently he has an idea already. So that's exciting, I guess, or scary. I don't know. Sure. But so my question is, I've never given him anything back. There's no problem. That's not a problem. It's not a problem.

Although sometimes I do get scared. he gives so much anticipation around what it is. Right. But I've never given him anything back. And he's always kind of like highlighting his weapon giving. And I've been thinking about it for a couple of years. Well, what could I give him? That would rival his creativity.

And I have no ideas. So I just haven't. So I would love some ideas for what I could give him. I don't, it doesn't necessarily have to be a weapon. In fact, I'd rather it not be because I want to be different. So, but I have no ideas. So I wanted, if you guys had ideas. What do you do for work, Titi?

Well, I work at an animal shelter. I'm in fundraising, but I'm also a cat. Get him a cat every year. He's got plenty of animals. He definitely does not need more animals. Wait, Tiki, what else do you do? I'm a circus artist. Well, well, well, well, well.

What does that mean a circus artist? I'm an aerialist. So I do, my specialty is the fabric. Oh, wow. You hang from those fabrics? Spins. I do. That's fucking cool as hell.

Glides through the air. Yes. You got any video we could watch? Could you get Berg up there? Google T.T. If you Google T.T. and my last name, which I don't know if I should give you on a recording, but I emailed my last name into Google T. Natalie, will you throw up a quick video with, and then I kind of want to see this. This might inspire the gift. And do you care if we put your video on our social? Oh, please do. Okay. Well, we're going to reveal your last name then if I'm showing this video. I don't mind. I don't mind. I just, I'm not sure what the, I've never been on a podcast, so I don't know.

There's no rules. It's the wildest. I don't know what's normal. Nothing. There's no normal. That's the beauty of it. It's no studio. There's no laws.

I mean, he's in a hotel in Montana. I'm in my closet. I'm going to have to. Just the reality is madness. You'll see, you'll see a lot of them. But my favorite is the U.S. Aerial Championship one. Whoa.

Yeah. You were in the U.S. championships? Yeah. Whoa, how'd you do? I won. I'm proud of that act. Wow.

All right. So what do you do? You just go around and you do shows? Not so much anymore. You're tired. But I was a professional for years and years. That's cool. So now I just do it as kind of a side thing.

Like at a wedding? Yeah. Actually, I did a wedding not that long. we go you know the we're here to help world with my brother officiating um he might be we might be in talks to be doing a wedding i think it's in florida uh and if it happens uh i might go to we might see if gareth wants to come if steve and eric want to show up maybe you'll be the entertainment uh it's fine yet i'm if we start a whole we're here to wed angle of this is just like It's just like...

I love it. And then you just go out there and you're fucking swinging on rope. Berg's getting a red face lispy toast while we're like, Jesus Christ, wrap it up. You do 15 minutes of material. Oh, okay, this is it. Okay.

Oh, wow. So it's just you, it's two ladies on a hula hoop when it looks like or a big ring. No, you're getting higher. Oh, you're watching my double that. Jesus, God, okay. I wanted to share the other one. but YouTube was blocking it, so I don't know.

Man, Jesus Christ. Wow. Yeah. This is wild. It's a lot of intertwining, spinning, dangerous. What is below you, Annette? I'm not sure which one you're watching, but... We're watching two ladies in gold...

Edwardian Ball. Edwardian Ball. Vodavir Society. Yeah, there's nothing. There's a floor. You ever taken a big fall here, T. do you? One time, yes, I did. And it was with the act that you're watching, actually, that's with my aerial partner Shredder. Yeah.

And, yeah, there's a move that's really dangerous that it didn't go quite right that night. It's pretty impressive. It's pretty impressive. Yeah, it is impressive. So this is cool, TZ. So now we're thinking of a gift of what we could give your brother because he gives you weapons. Yeah. So just to give you a little bit of insight on him, because this also might help you figure something else, is that he is like a huge sports guy. Obviously, he has a great sense of humor, but he loves sports. It doesn't matter. It doesn't matter. I'll tell you why. But he also loves lifetime movies.

Okay. Anyway, like just gives you an idea of this guy. Well, he's not doing anything that you like. He's making you weapons. So who cares what he likes? Okay. You're trying to be thoughtful. He gives you a fucking machete. How did you make your uniform when you would perform? Kind of piecemealing it together.

I would maybe buy a base and then add things to it. I think I know what you're going to say. I'm excited. Yeah, I am. I want you to make him an annual uniform, a two-piece. Oh, my God. I love this idea so much. Tight little bottoms.

Tight little top. you got to admit your uniform was provocative oh yeah yeah and let's definitely make him one productive get him so a little hugs the little butt cheeks a little bit give it in front of the family and then say Paul I would like you to try on your gift oh my god I love it so much

why didn't I think of this but just why he gives you knives and swords and you give him outfits inspired by your championship performances. Should I just actually give him one of my old, you know, something that has been? I don't think he would fit into it. No, and I also think you want to, you want to cater it to him a little bit. You know, he's, put his favorite team on the back. I was going to say, you maybe can make it a little sports themey.

But part of the thing, he likes everyone to open, you have to look at the knife, you then do it to him and go, I'd really like you to try it on. he's a funny guy when you call out a funny guy it's like hey you're Mr. Funny guy so go be funny Yeah No he'll do it too

Of course he will And then every year He makes you a weapon And you make him a cute little outfit And then eventually get him hanging from a rope Exactly See that little butt swing around on Christmas

This is what we call This is a one for one This is a one pitch We're good to go A perfect pitch A perfect pitch. Perfect pitch. Home run.

So you're happy, Tudu. I am. Will you follow up with us how the uniform looks? You've got to be really discreet and get his sizes. Yeah, I can guess. I can guess. But also remember, tight is funny. Yes, but we also need it to fit so it doesn't go like, it doesn't go above my thighs.

Yeah. And then will you send us the video on Christmas of him trying it on? Oh, absolutely. Yeah, yeah. I don't have to let you guys know what I get as a weapon this year, too. Of course. Yeah. But this will be a very good follow-up,

and it will really end with photos of him or video of him in this cute little outfit. Yeah. Maybe dancing a little bit, maybe doing his own little stuff. Yeah. And then if you could get him, you know how on the machete he put a little bit of that, the robe, the little rope thing? You could give him a little thing that he could hang on, too. Mm-hmm.

I'll see if I can come up with something. Yeah. I don't know. No, this is great. It's going to be really fun. We haven't decided when we're getting together, but... How old is he, TT? He's in a 50s.

This is awesome. This is an awesome answer. Yeah, it's going to look great. This is awesome. Don't be afraid to let it really show everything off, like I said. No, of course. No, there's nothing. If it's an aerialist-inspired cost,

assume it has to. I totally agree. Yeah, there we go. Yeah. Well, T.T. Jake switched it. We can't wait to see the follow-up with your brother. And good luck.

Where do you put all the weapons, T.T. Oh, well, see, the only one I kept is the machete, which is why I sent that. Because I don't, I just, I look at it and I think what, I can't. I just can't keep this down my house. No, you can't keep a tunicam weapon. No. Makes sense. All right, T.T.

Thank you, T. Appreciate it. Thanks so much. Hello. Whoa. What's up, Rodic? Oh, my God. Natalie did not tell us what was going on.

Wow. Oh. What's happening, Big Dog? What's going on down? Wow. Now much. Natalie, do we have a follow-up on trash? a follow up on trash hole.

You want to talk to... Fuck, what's been going on, Roddick. Big fan, Andy. Hi. Hey, Garrett. Me too, man. Jake, I've been doing nothing except waiting for this. By the way, same.

That athlete mentality. Yeah, I can't get it out of my head. Same. All right, well, let's bring him on. That's amazing. I love that you came back. That's so great. Yeah, I had to.

I had to. Hello? Hello. Hi. Hi. Can you retell us your name, please? We know this is a follow-up. Yes.

My name is Nadine. Nadine, and we know because Andy Roddick is back for this. Oh, hell yeah. And you also got Gareth Reynolds now, too. So, Nadine, walk Gareth through what the first problem was, what the pitch was, and then we'll get to the follow-up. Okay, so I was playing, or I tried to play this game called Trash Hole with my fiance, where I would just throw the trash off my balcony into the bin, but I sucked

at it, and so he told me I couldn't do it because I was making messes, but, so we decided to come up with a plan, a contract, and so I could. play. And yeah. And what was the contract we came up with? So I did change it a little bit. So the contract that we came up with was that I would like practice on

my own. Wow. This was official. Wait, Nadine, Gareth, will you read with this contract? You made a real contract. Well, let's just say, yeah. Let's just say it's quite official looking. Okay. Quickly, trash hold participation agreement.

This agreement is entered into buy and between Javier, Plaintiff, and Nadine, defendant, collectively referred to as the parties. Practice session. 1A supervised practice session consisting of 10 throws will be conducted. Two, said practice shall utilize bags filled

only with non-trash items, i.e. towels, blankets, pillows, et cetera. Three, the session will be overseen and filmed by the plaintiff. Okay. Conditions for weekly play. Should the defendant, achieve a minimum success rate of 70% defined as seven successful throws out of 10 during the

practice session, the defendant shall assume both the right and the duty to participate in trash hole on a weekly basis, specifically on the evening prior to municipal trash collection day. This is great, maybe. Failure to achieve the 70% benchmark in the initial practice session or failure to successfully execute any future trash hole throws with real trash, which results in a mess and or general chaos shall trigger the service obligations outlined in section three. Fuck, yes.

Section three, service obligations. In the event of failure is defined in section 2.2, the defendant agrees to provide one of the following services of the plaintiffs choosing, in addition to promptly cleaning any resulting mess or disorder. Wait, one stop, Garrett. Nadine, are you a lawyer? No, see, AI is good for like a couple things. Right.

This is great AI usage. This is worth the water. Yeah. Okay, so here we go. The prizes. 15 minute back massage with complimentary scratch session. Wow. 15 minutes of video game play, game choice to be termined by the plaintiff with full engagement by the defendant.

30 minutes of Lego building. Uh-oh. With full engagement by the defendant. 30 minutes of YouTube content viewing of the plaintiff's choice with full engagement by the defendant. The plaintiff's choice is really funny. If my wife had to watch my YouTube videos and pretend to be interested, shot. That's tough. That's tough stuff, man.

Watching somebody's YouTube videos is the new looking at their porn sites. What about watching them build legos? No, YouTube is worse. What you watch at YouTube at midnight, it's the weirdest stuff, man. Okay. In the event of failure as defined in Section 2.2 and is briefed in Section 3.1, the defendant agrees to promptly and thoroughly clean and dispose of any and all materials

included in a potential mess as a result of said failure. Satisfactory cleanup parameters will be determined and agreed upon by the parties in real time per incident with final approval by the plaintiff. Four. How many pages is this? That's a good. Okay, we're almost back. Okay. Four, definition of full engagement.

Addendum, 1A. Full engagement shall be defined as an active participation in the chosen activity without use of cellular... Skip this, go to five. Okay, basically don't use your part. This is a lawyer to talk now. Don't use your phone and don't be a jerk. Five, governing principles.

That's pretty much it, yeah. Five point one. This agreement intended to be humorous binding only in spirit carried out in good faith by both parties. Both parties acknowledge that the purpose of this agreement is to foster entertainment, household harmony, and mutual amusement. Insane. Five was insane that you guys had to do that. Yeah. So, Nadine, you and Javier both signed this?

In spirit. I was like, yeah, sure. Not like actually because I don't have a printer. Okay. But he agreed. Wow. What a hurdle. He agreed.

Wait, wait. You did all of those five things and you went through all of the stuff that Gareth just talked about and you couldn't get a printed off. Like that was the barrier ticket to not getting this official? I'm 32. I don't know if a printer. That's crazy. Wild sentence. Like wait until she hears like you can sign things digitally.

It's crazy. I can't believe coming up with all this and not knowing about doxy sign. That's the point. Okay. I just figure, yeah, okay, I will sign it. But you guys are both. The point is, is you and Javier agreed all this, correct? Yes.

So then. He's on board. What I remember in our last call was there was something about practice. And then, Rod, if we were talking about watching video and giving notes or something. Yeah, there was no whole weight thing. Like, we just, we needed you to get, we needed to streamline her practice organization, right? Like, yes. The shapes of the trash.

how what's an average bag like if we're going to get serious let's actually do it and so nadine didn't work out okay how that part didn't work out because if I'm being honest I was just wasn't like going to practice trash hole um but because that's why I changed it to the practice and a professional athlete yeah this is why trash hole gets a bad name and he's not impressed I do as it should Okay, so you're not going to practice. So, no, the practice was condensed into the 10 practice sessions where he watched. So I just skipped the practice part because I had faith that I could make 7 out of 10. Well, shit, how'd you do?

And I did 9 out of 10. I got a 90%. Wait. What? We had the video. Oh, let's see the video. Yes. Natalie.

He wanted to make it like really short because I wasn't, He didn't want to, like, edit the audio. Oh, this is cool. So it's, like, 42 seconds. Let's watch the whole thing. Okay. And we'll post this on Instagram. All right.

First shot. This is great. Good technique. This is not my idea. Oh, but the trash fell over. Wow. Two out of ten. The bin falls over every time.

That's terrible. Okay. That's what I need help with. That's my new. problem. Hold on. These are all misses. These are all misses. Okay. The bin falls over. It's a mess. So she's getting it in, but the bin topples. This is insane.

Stop the video. Stop the video. Stop the video. This is Magnus. Okay. The whole point, Nadine, is not to knock over the bin. I know. And so, but I let him decide. I said, do you want these to count as makes or misses? And he said, you know what, it's fine, it's a make. So I made 9 out of 10, and I figure I can just move the trash can into the middle. Rodick, your thoughts. I mean, the technique is great. Obviously, you're one of those athletes that doesn't need to practice.

I envy you. But you've got to put like a sandbag on the other side of the trash can. This is a very easy fix. So I wish, I just wish you would have kind of put that thought into it, maybe before we went through it. But congrats on their natural athletic system anyways. Yeah, but also, Nadine, I got to say the whole idea of this is not just to, if you have a trash full of garbage and you throw it in and the bin tips over, that's the worst case scenario here, pal.

You go, yeah, I threw it in what happened. It fell over and all the trash went in the driveway, but I made it in. That is a miss from my eyes, zero for 10. I understand. I understand your point of view but the trash is well tied I can move the trash can into the middle of the three trash cans so it won't fall over

I think it's bullshit that we get these rinky dink trash cans like why is the recycling and green went all big I agree but Nadine That's not my fault. Don't blame the sport Nadine but Nadine I just got to be real here Javier is being nice

if you're throwing trash in and it's knocking the big over, that's a miss. The idea is it has to be clean. Yep. You missed them all. Jake, I kind of slightly disagree with you. How come? If she can get Javier to agree that that's a make,

why are she going to grasp and defeat from the jaws of victory? It's very true. But it makes me wonder what's going on with Javier. I fully agree with Jake and also ring the bell. He's not wrong at all. But, I mean, does Javier even want to be watched while building Legos? That's my question. But I do think Andy's right.

It is a bell ring. The point is that I have to help. Yes. I think it's a bell ring. I think she moves it in the middle and it's a bell ring. I'm just not there yet. Nadine, so what happened? So you hit nine out of ten, and then you got a back massage for that effort?

Does poor man have to rub your back and scratch your back after you knocking the bin over nine times? No, my prize is that now I get to play trash hole. I don't need a back scratch. Oh, okay. I got you. So now he's not allowed to say. But I don't need to put it in a contract. Yeah.

Okay. So now the end is you can play trash all whenever you want. Yes. Well, on municipal trash days. Yeah, but Nadine, what do you think about? And I'm with Andy. I'm with Gareth. Ring the bell.

But I just had a principle, which is where I live on this show. How do you feel about you throwing it in in the trash bin falling over? Well. In your heart. Not great. I don't feel great about it. I really don't. Because the bin's falling over.

So I know you're saying it's tied up tight. But the whole idea is not, if I'm throwing something in the garbage and I go, I'm taking a shortcut. Yeah. And the bin falls over. Now it's a long cut. Now I need to go down there and pick up the bin and all the trash that fell out. No, I don't. He's down there.

He'll do that. I got to talk to Javi. He needs a lawyer. He's getting fucked on this deal, Nadine. You're throwing garbage into a bin. Javier has to go pick up the whole bin and throw the garbage back in so you get to throw it off a balcony? No, the garbage stays in the bin.

It doesn't roll out. It just falls over. Gareth, your thoughts. I think if she moves, this is what I think. I think if she moves it to the middle and the bin stops falling over, we've got a bell ring. But I do think we probably need to just make sure

by seeing a little bit more evidence and the idea that you're not going to be watching Javier's YouTube or something like that does feel a little strange to me there is a flaw in your practice but I do think after reading all that you know, this is a bell. Andy, your thoughts.

Yeah, one, I'm happy that you're holding up the moral fiber of this show. and really sticking it to trash hole and wanting it done the correct way, Jake. That's admirable. Also, are you not married? You don't know that this is obviously just like

Javier going, yeah, yeah. I mean, you win, no problem. I mean, I'm sorry. Is your marriage different? Technically? I don't understand. No, technically we get on our next trash day is, so in two days,

we are getting officially married on our trash day. So I'll celebrate with the trash hall. Wow. Congratulations. Wow. Okay, so here's, here, Jake, I'll raise you this. Okay. If on my wedding day, I can make a clean trash hole without the bin falling over.

Yes. Can I just do it my way? Yes, but Nadine, here's what it has to be, dude. You have to move the, if the bin falls, it's a miss. Why? Because the bin is falling over. The convenience. is the whole point

is that it makes your life easier. And that it makes how... You know what? You're right. You're right. The whole point is this. I don't have to walk out there. I can throw it. And he's going, I don't know, honey. It's going to be more of a mess. And you go, it's not. Trust me. And then you go, I made 9 of 10.

He goes, you're the best. And then he walks down and picks up the bin and throws the garbage in. This... Okay. The math don't add up. This is screaming for an addendum on that contract. So I think... I think that's a great...

I know you said you don't do practice. That was practice. On your wedding days, the game. Okay. And we got to do seven out of ten with the bin standing. If the bit... And however you want to do it, I don't know. Put them in the middle.

Throw a sandbag. Middle. That's going to be... But if the middle works, I'm good with it. But if one of the bin falls, Nadine, that's a miss. All right. Damn. I knew you were going to say that.

It's hard. Yeah. All right, then I will keep trying. And if you need to practice, then practice. Do you think Andy Rodick became a champion by not practicing? Do you think? Listen, I practice as much as I could and I still lost the people, Nadine. That's what happens.

You don't just go out there and go. I'm sorry, woman's not given to me. Can you get the trash can to stand up, please? Nadine, you're exactly as mistimed, I think, but yes. So, Nadine, here's, we're very close to a bell ring. We appreciate the hell out of you. We appreciate the work you did. I just, as what this has turned into is we're your coach.

And as your coach, I think in your heart, you know, you've got to give a better effort. Wow. This is tough. You want to know why, Nadia? Because I think you're going to win. But I don't think you've won yet. I think I'm going to win too. But I don't think you've won yet.

Okay, so Wood can, like moving that little trash can into the middle, is that considered cheating? No, there's no cheating here. Why would it be? There's no cheating. Here's what the game is. Can you throw trash from upstairs into the hole and make it easy?

I don't care if you cement the goddamn thing to the ground. Don't do that, though. Don't do that because that would make it harder. But the point is, is I need to see video of you throwing it, it going in, The trash can't say, the dream would be if the lid falls too. Oh, come on. Stop being greedy. I'm saying the dream.

I'm saying the dream. Yeah. I am getting good. You want to shut out? Just let her win. Yeah, but if you, if you get seven out of ten and three times the bin falls over, that's still a win. But if it's six out of ten, then it's a loss, Nadine. Right now, I saw nine losses.

What, Jake. I did. Every time. Play the video again. Natalie, do you mind playing it again? Do you mind playing it again? Don't play it again. Can we play it again?

Yeah, I can play it again. We're going to watch it again really fast. Keep in mind, a fall is a miss, right? Let's just see what happened. Okay. First throw, Nadine, cool, rocky music. And throw number one, good technique, and miss. Oh, for 10.

Oh, for one. And number two, the throw. She threw it too far again, missed. It's got to go to the inside. The boom's got to be on the inside. Because she's not practicing, Andy. Say miss. She's just trying to escape by here.

Same miss. Say miss. Okay. Missed. It does look really fun. I got to be honest. It looks really fun. Yeah, but it would be more fun to not miss.

Miss. You are supposed to be on my side. Nadine, I can't be. I'm your coach. You missed in the same. spot every time. You want to know why? Because you were throwing it too hard.

Move the bin, you've got to hit it in the middle. That's a miss, Rocky. That's a miss. Or even go full inside. I mean, obviously the trajectory, the angle was too extreme. You're just knocking it over every time. And then the adjustments you made and they didn't were nothing.

Jake. You missed in the same fucking driver. It's, I was trying to do it with one hand and then I tried to do it with two hands to, like, guide it more. Can you imagine somebody shooting a free throw missing and going, I'm going to miss ten times in the same way? Move.

Expectations are, you know. That's tough, but true. You got a wedding in two days, kid. I would get out there in practice. Oh, yeah. What else are you going to do next to me?

I mean, honestly, yeah, just to focus on what matters. Figure out how to toss trash off your patio. What's important here, bud? Yeah. All right. I'll get to it. I'm going to say this, and I mean this in my heart of hearts. I believe in you. And I really think you could do it.

You're right there. What you showed was not it, and I know you know that. I really was hoping you wouldn't call me out, but you're 100% right. I was not happy that that can was falling over. No, you couldn't believe it, but you did such a great contract that you thought, maybe everyone's just going to be positive. What do you think this is weird here to help? and Eric and Steve are going to go, wow, Jesus, you threw it.

I think that's a huge win for you, Nadine. Steve would have said the win of you by simply throwing garbage. And Eric would go, wow, you threw garbage. I got a great feeling about you two kids. So in closing, Nadine, you're close. Say it again, Andy? I just want to hear him say municipal. What you need to get is a scanner or a,

a printer. Take this down to your local municipal courthouse. Nadine? Seven out of ten. Seven out of ten. That's not bad. I'm expecting a lot out of you, and I think you can do it. It's not going to be easy. Maybe the strategy is move it in the middle. If I were you, I would try that before you film it again. Because if you go a little left, you were hitting on the outside, if you hit the outside and it hits the other garbage and the other garbage falls, I don't need to tell you. We both know that's a miss. Oh, yeah, no, that's obvious, yeah, no, no, that's really a miss, a make is you throw it from the balcony, it goes in the garbage, the garbage is stand up.

That's a make. Okay. However you need to do that, I would have that organized, I would figure out your throws. You kept throwing it long, kid. That's what I thought, but I was scared that if I did it too short, it would just explode. But you were long. You were hitting the outside of the box. to swish these.

All right. All right. Let us not. Wow. Come on, hold on a minute. This feels like a downer. No, it isn't. Nadine, you got this.

Okay. Move the bend to the middle. Throw your bouquet like that. Let's do this. We have a professional athlete on the line. Oh, that's what I could do. So, Andy, do you have any parting advice? This is a big game coming up for her.

gareth and i've never played a big game in our lives don't speak for me i'm gonna tell you something to get to the highest level of trash hole you can't you can't do that weak stuff and say that you're winning like the game's only going to get better there are better players out there whenever you think you're great at something just travel a little further right see what the rest of the world has the there are people in in singapore playing trash hole and not missing no trash on the ground right You have to want it You have to stay disciplined Let's actually get a real win

Let's not just skate by talent All right I mean Because you do have talent Nadine A lot of talent That's time for some integrity They didn't

Follow up with us This next one And if it's not a win Follow up Yep Also on the wedding list Put a printer It's just super easy to go

Nadine Thank you for the call Rodick Thanks for coming back. And Rodic, we're going to invite you back again for the real estate. Thank you, Andy. This is all I like to do. Thanks, Andy.

Bye. Bye, Nadine. That's awesome. Hello, my name is Lex. I am from Austin, Texas. And I, this might be a hot take. it also might just be a unanimous point of view

but now they're in the holiday season watching a lot of Christmas movies just got done watching Home Alone for the probably 100th time but this time felt a little different because

when I saw Harry and Marv the only two people I saw was Jake and Gareth and I don't know if anybody else can relate. I don't know if anybody else sees those two. When they see Harry and Marv, whether it's Jake's accent or Gareth's curly hair. Yeah, and now I can't unsee it. So like I said, it might be a hot take, but I wanted to bring this observation to the table because it's brilliant.

Merry Christmas. We're Here to Help is hosted by Jake Johnson and Gareth Reynolds. If you'd like to be on the show, please email us your question at helpful pod at gmail.com. And if you want to watch video episodes of We're Here To Help, you can go to our Patreon at patreon.com slash here to help pod to see our entire catalog. We're Here to Help is produced by Rabbit Grimm Productions, executive producers Rob Hollis, Jeff Porter, and Natalie Hollis. Associate producer Jesse Thurston Editing Mix and Master by Chris Fowler Theme song by Oliver Raleigh

The cover artwork is by James Fostike Animations by Andrew Strelicki And if you'd like to see Gareth do stand up on the road Go to Gareth Reynolds.com Remember all of the advice Given on we're here to help is for entertainment purposes only And all listeners should be adults And make their own decisions

All video episodes of season one Are available now on Patreon And season two video episodes will be available every Monday starting January 20th. Go to patreon.com forward slash Here to Help Pod. Hi, I'm Nicole Byer. Hi, I'm Sashir Zameda.

And this is the podcast, Best Friends. And we're here at HeadGum. So this is just a podcast where we just talk. Yeah. We're best friends. We talk. And then we have a segment where we answer questions and queries. So audience members can ask questions about friendships.

and we can answer them to the best of our abilities. Yes. We are professional friends. We are professional friends. Subscribe to Best Friends on Spotify, Apple Podcast, PocketCast, or wherever you get your podcast and watch videos on YouTube. New episodes drop every Wednesday. That's the middle of a work week.

I was deeply unhelpful to you during that whole thing. You were. I'm really sorry. I felt the support. I was so, okay. I was trying to be supportive. Yeah. But I was like, well,

I don't know, reading seems pretty hard right now. It's a lot. I think you did good. Thank you so much. You're welcome.