We're Here to Help - 314: Heavy Hand & Don't Push It

Episode Date: August 10, 2026

The guys put a QR code on a Nashville rooftop. Then, Gareth and Guest Helper Ryan Gaul keep a new lawnmower in mint condition. Plus a follow-up from Ep 279 "Rent-Free."See images from the episode here: https://www.heretohelppod.com/post/episode-314 Want to call in? Email your question to [e-mail]: https://patreon.com/heretohelppodMERCH: heretohelppod.comINSTAGRAM: @HereToHelpPodIf you’re enjoying the show, make sure to rate We’re Here to Help 5-Stars on Apple Podcasts.Advertise on We’re Here to Help via Gumball.fmSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

This is a headgum podcast. This is a headgum podcast. And we are back. We're back, Gareth. Jake. You know where I've been? Everywhere. You've been everywhere.

That's what I thought. Now, what's the schedule like for this? Well, I'm back home now, but I'm going to be there until, no. I'm going to be there until early August. But something happened with Damon Wynes Jr. and I, we went out to, we did a table read or something like that or a big rehearsal. Then he and I decided to get a bite to eat, and he said, where do you want to go? And I said, where did Anthony Bourdain go when he was in Vancouver?

That's a great question for any city. That's what I do. So wherever he went, that's where I go. That's great. That's where I go. So he went to where the California roll was first invented, a sushi place. So we went there. The night was ended.

We retired. I said, he goes, ah, man, I can't wait to get to the hotel and get some sleep. And he goes, yeah, I got to go to the gym. And I go to the gym at night a night? You psycho? And he goes, well, I have to take 10,000 steps every day. And if I don't do it, I get on a treadmill. And he goes, baseline.

And I go, really? We got to talk in, Gareth. We decided to walk home. We went over the Granville Bridge, walked all the way back over two and a half miles to our hotel. Gareth, since that moment, I've done 10,000 steps every single day. I'm totally into it. I love it. It's like a weird, you do too?

You do it? Yeah, I do. My mother's in town, and she is like a human rumba. She loves to walk. You and I have taken a number of crazy walks together. Oh, yeah. Do you remember the main one? The craziest one we took was in Detroit

when we were filming Harold and Kumar and we went out to dinner, you, me and Evan, and we went out to dinner, and then we were like, let's just walk. And it was insane. Crazy. The night-in's...

Yes, well, we crossed the eight mile, like idiots. At this point, we all had our shirts off, and you and Evan raced each other, and I think Evan threw up after you guys race because we'd had some beers and I'd hurt my ankle so I couldn't race like from something and we just went on the,

we were walking for so long. So lost because I think it was pre- Google Maps. We also took a big walk after we did the 100th that took Kevin's. And we went the wrong way. We were just walking around like Mondros. Well we were like, we were just like,

let's get to some beers. And then we were walking for, Two hours. Forever. And then we just got a lift and the weirdest lift ever and then just had like one beer and we're like,

let's get out of here. The night is over. There are, I know you very well. And there's things that you say sometimes that I go, that is way out of character. And there's other times

when I'm like, yeah, I know exactly what he's going to do. I, um, something happened recently where I was very surprised. And this isn't my personal life, But so I said something or you said something. Well, here's what happened.

So I, over the years, and don't say anything, and let me just get through this. So over the years, I've done a couple of events at a thing called CatCon, which is run by this woman named Suzanne, who's awesome, loves cats. And I don't even remember how I got connected with it, but probably five years ago or something, we met. I went to something, because I have a cat. My cat's become a fit. Like, you know, my cat is on Instagram and all this shit. So whatever. So, anyway, I hadn't talked.

Stop saying that, like, your cat created the Instagram and it got popular. I thought my cat is an Instagram. Because it feels like. This is madness. You don't have to physically move the mic. I love, you can't shut up on a level you have to move. All the stuff you're saying has been madness. I mean, like, my cat is an Instagram.

It's a whole thing. You started the cat. Instagram. Not necessarily. Not necessarily. I did. But not necessarily. Okay. So anyway, so she calls me

and she's like, do you want to do this event in October, like October 11th or something at the next CatCon? Because it's in, I forget where it is, but I go, yeah, for sure. And then she's talking to me, she's running through it, and she goes, you know, I just found out you do a show with Jake

Johnson, and I go, yeah. And she goes, he came to Cat Con a couple years ago. and I went, excuse me? And she said, yeah. And I said, I genuinely was like, I don't think we're talking about the same person. She sends me pictures of Jake at CatCon. And I'm like, what?

And there you are at Catcom with your daughter. Now, a couple things jump out. One, you're at CatCon, which just, you know what I mean? A guy who goes to CatCon doesn't sound like a guy who's going to be like telling me and my cat didn't start an Instagram. The other thing that I noticed, what's my man wearing? We're here to help merch out in the wild.

I was proud, but I was shocked that you ran T-Con. I have a daughter. She loves cats. This is great. Just deep as egg. I'm not mad at you. I'm happy.

I have allergies to cats, and I was not happy there. Because there's a lot of cats at Catcom. It's a whole thing. now I'm going to show you something. Okay. So we did the cookoff, and the whole thing

which all you guys know about is if Steve lost, he wasn't allowed to talk about food for six months. He lost. He lost because he didn't work as hard as Adam Oler. Well, I think the majority of people

listen to this show would go, yeah, it makes sense. The majority of people on Patreon did not feel that way and felt Jake and Gareth didn't give him a fair shot and they hated us. for it, and they got so mad.

There was a petition that was started that it was like free justice for burger or something insane. I mean, the guy got high and talked to music all day. His whole technique was double-dipping the chicken in the panko. We didn't tie a hand behind us back.

He had everything all around. We had everything technique, and he goes, dip it twice. Listen, we can't listen. We can't go down the word of burger out of home. We can't dip the panko again. But anyway, we decided we've got a new plan.

And sure enough, on the Patreon, all heel, wrestling hill, Jake was coming out. And I dubbed him Hollywood Hulk Hogan because he now realizes he likes to be like, you're not going to win that, brother. You're not going to win anything again. And so we just received a Photoshop of Berg in his glasses, which he's now wearing,

and Jake photoshopped his Hollywood Hulk Hogan. Will you give this audience about a minute of your whole whole Kogan and then take us to the ads, Gareth. All right. Now I know there's a lot of people out there who are talking about how Steve Berg deserves another chance at a cooking competition. He had one, brother. He had one not too long ago.

And he squandered his whole time by smoking weed and talking about a band that very few people have ever heard about. And then he comes in there with some tasteless airplane chicken parmesan. Some of you played 9.95 for it say you were overcharged. And then he loses. And what does he do? He goes on the Patreon and he cries, brother. He cries tears.

Big, big crocodile tears. Nobody's seen him. That's why he's wearing those glasses. Nobody can see the tear ducks. And what happens? The Patriot community falls for it. So Jacob Gareth, out of the kindness of their hearts, they decide they're going to give him another shot.

Another shot for some reason. But he doesn't have a chance. He's going to be making a meatloaf. A meatloaf. And I'm not going to tell you anymore, but we got a lot of ideas, brother. And he's going to make a meatloaf that's going to be better than a bargain-bin meatloaf. And he's going to get rewarded.

He's going to get rewarded over and over again. Because a guy like that, a little Nordic guy with a lisp, everyone gives him sympathy, and they think that he deserves more and more. You talk about privilege, you're talking about Steve Berg. So tune in, pay attention, get on the Patreon, and if you don't like it, brother, I'll come and I'll give you an arm bar. Until then, without further ado, enjoy the ads. Hollywood, Johnson, out. And we are brought to you by Tiny, Howdy, Howie. Health. Okay, let's talk about it, everybody. Feeling bloated? Of course you are. We all are. We're bloated. It's horrible. Some people say that that's because, you know, you've been, you're busy or you're

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on this show a lot because we use rocket money a lot and we recommend people who are trying to stretch their money further use rocket money. Jake and I have both confessed to each other about a bunch of things we found on our rocket money accounts that we were shocked that we were paying for. I was paying for a weird weather app that I did not need, but that weather app, the forecast was calling for them to take money from me, a Packers radio station that I did not need radio. That's how long ago this was. But one of the things is it shows you these things that you're paying for that you probably don't need anymore. And it's not even a matter if you've just forgotten about it. It's also you get to look at your subscription management and sort of decide, do I need this?

I have this. I don't know if I do. But there are a lot of apps out there or platforms that basically depend on you downloading them for that free week and then forgetting about it. And Rocket Money has your back when it comes to that. Rocket Money is a personal finance app that helps you find and cancel on one of subscriptions, monitors your spending, and helps lower your bills so you can grow your savings. Let Rocket Money help you reach your financial goals faster. Join at RocketMoney.com slash help. That's rocketmoney.com slash help. Rocketmoney.com slash help. And we're brought to you by Dunkman. Presented by Shaquille O'Neal. Dunkman is a new electrifying dunk league that aims to transform dunking from a one-night contest to a high-stakes

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Hello. Hello. How you doing, Big Dog? Big Dog is doing great. Where are you calling from Big Dog? You in the candle? You're out back? Can we get your name, please? Cindy.

Or you can call me Eugene. That's what my niece and my nephew call me, so you guys can pick. Eugene? Eugene. Oh, Eugene. Okay. Why they call you Eugene, Cindy? Well, because I told them that Auntie Cindy was boring, and I was tired of hearing about it.

So I said, I need you two to get together and figure out a better name to call me. Cool. And so two weeks later, my sister called me and she said they've decided on her name because I told them that they had to agree on it. All right, Eugene. Where are you calling from? Downtown Nashville. I love Nashville. The best. You downtown Nashville, your name's Eugene.

What can we do for you today? I need help with the bullshit that we deal with next door. So I am, when I say I, I mean, our building is four feet away from an Airbnb building. So think about all the tourists that come into town and want to dump down Vegas. And it was built, I think there's four floors, I think. So we're all Airbnbs? Yes. I think there may be two owners that live there that actually have a property,

but they're on the pool side, which is on the back side of it. So what we get is just degenerates that look down on our property, and we've got a nice garden. And we've got an oasis. And we have movie nights and we have concerts. Eugene, you mean they quite literally from their window look down on your stuff? Yes. And I did include some pictures so you can kind of see.

I'd love to say. Oh, I would like to say we rescheduled this for July 8th. And I got a last minute call on July 2nd. And I was like, I'll do it. Whatever it takes, I'll do it. And so I called the owner of the building and I said, listen, this podcast is taking place. And I need you to reconfirm that you're okay with me taking over the building. And he said, I don't give a fuck if you paint a middle finger on that rooftop.

It's yours because they've been giving me so much shit. they, you know, constructed the place. Okay. Interesting. Okay. So we have some, we can do some stuff. Oh, we can do so many things. All right.

We got a video here. I don't know what this video is. Explain the video a little bit. That was 3.30 on a Tuesday. This is loud. Loud. I hear what you're saying. So you're the brick building.

It's right next door. So what we're looking at is on the right side, there's a brick building. Then there's this beautiful gate. And then... That's my gate. Beautiful gay, Jean. Then next to the gate, there's an apartment building with balconies that hang over Eugene's backyard. And the video is just...

It was a static shot on the brick with really loud music. It's so loud. That's crazy. And you're talking about that... Do you want to hear something that's wild? Yeah. This is wild. Okay.

These people were like 50 years old. It's young. Now, I am, no, no, no, no, let me say this. Let me say this. Jen, you tickle. I'm in my early 50s, but I identify as a 40-year-old. Okay. So does Garrish.

So this house is fun. We have a lot of parties. We do a lot of things. I'm, I mean, but. Don't come here acting like douchebacks. Right. Okay. So the main, we're looking at another picture now.

I mean, it just kind of shows how balconyed out this zone is here. So it's pretty open. It's pretty loud. You're right there. Uh-huh. The main complaint is the noise is insane, even though some of the music is good. And the cops aren't coming to Nashville for a noise complaint. Yeah.

Is that right? Well, they probably, first of all, we've, we've never caught. the cops because we don't want to be those people. We've kind of befriended security guards. We have their cell phone numbers. We take them baked goods. We're in good graces with a property manager. But herein lies the problem.

Talk to us. The problem is there are people pissing over the balcony. I knew. Empting their coolers, dumping out whatever they had to drink. They're a back alley. Pissing over the balconies. They, yeah, they have no idea. idea what it is.

And so we end up cream at Brian Austin Green. What? Listen. If I'm... If I get a hot urine stream to my dome, I'm burning that fucking building town. Okay.

I mean, Eugene, you really moved over the fact of Eric Gettlesean through sour cream a bag. I'm fine with it. I just don't want to have to leave my house in a hazmat and a helmet. So that brick number is yours? It's not mine. Like, I don't own the property. That's beautiful.

I like it. It's got a little charm. It's cool. And did you... No, it's great. Did you... And I just want to say, the owner, and I'm sorry to interrupt you, but the owner, so we rescheduled this call, right?

So I had... The July 2nd thing, yeah. I had like a, I don't know, a 24-hour notice, which I was fine. I was like, this is so exciting. And when I got that email from Natalie or Jesse, I acted like you when you saw Prince. Eugene, can I ask you a question? A new girl.

Eugene, can ask you your question? Yes, you may. Yes, you may. We're going to help you figure out this fucking problem. Do you understand me? But I have a question. Listen. Hold on.

This is a bell ringer. Eugene? Not yet. It's not. I'm listening. You're in a nice. You had a pop or something today? You had a couple pops?

What's the pop? Drink. Cocktail. I've had one because I have been nauseous all day. What is it? Bonda soda. How big of a pour on the vod? We're doing.

How tall is the glass? Heavy hand. Okay. All right. We just want to make sure we're picking up on the right thing here. We're getting that vibe, okay? It's a normal. So listen.

It's a normal glass. Heavy hand. You know what that's better than just a few tiny beers? Yeah. Here's what we're going to do, Eugene. Just a few tiny beers is. We're going to take your hands off of the piloting mechanism. Jake and I are in the cockpit, but you're still here, and we're going to land this fucker.

So we're going to, the bottom line to your problem, if you had to say it in one sentence, would be. Go ahead. Very good job, Gareth. I have a real estate on the roof of our building that I've been given the blessing to, to write a message that everyone from the balcony can, see the problem is it's so much that I need you guys

to record a video sum it up and let's give you the first billboard in Nashville holy shit Eugene I'm going to give you one more one more crack at this because you really lost us at the end we made a video and a billboard I don't get it you have the real estate of the

roof that these people will be able to see before dumping their coolers are pissing. That is correct. And what you would like from us is, one more time? A billboard on our roof so that when anyone looks over the balcony, it says, Welcome to Nashville. It's your logo. And it's just a QR code. Oh, my God.

That is a link to a video. that says, hey, welcome to Nashville. We hope you have a great time. The problem is with us on our end, kind of like what my landlord said is like, yeah, pain a fucking middle finger on it. Call it a day because this has been awful. So what I, it was like, well, no, that's not going to do anything.

It's not going to do anyone any good because then it's going to make us a target. We're trying to avoid littering. We're trying to avoid people pissing over the balcony. or puking over the balcony or throwing their trash over the balcony, which is our walkway, not just the Airbnb's building property. So it's like, help us help you. So I feel like it could be really good.

If y'all could just record a video based on all the things, that they do. And then it becomes a billboard on our rooftop that when they look down, it's like, stand this QR code or whatever. I don't know how to take it. Unless you works from being honest. But I think it would be a great way to promote the show.

We get a revolving door of tourists. We get Scottish people. We get the carols. There's like, Carol, this, this, This recipe requires an avocado. Like, we hear everything. Right. And once you look through all the videos,

you'll see how bad it echoes. And there are good times with this Airbnb, like a bunch of dudes with an instructor-led, footloose, dance, like line dance situations, which was really entertaining. and custody battles happening over the phone, motivational speakers. We have had some good times being able to hear what's going on. But at the same time, they overlook us.

So it's like we can't even really enjoy our backyard because then they want to engage. And the only people that engage the best are the Canadians. And we can't ask this building to say only book Canadians because they are the kindest people ever. So I would love for you all to have your first billboard in Nashville on our roof. So what do you want on the roof there, Eugene? I'm open to it. We have to talk expenses, but well, so there's a chance we could make a QR code.

Yeah, that goes to a website that just plays the video. Yes. Let's actually do it. If you are open to it, we can make it happen. And then what would that, what do you think that would consider? It's free, it's free marketing. Yeah, but only to like nine people at a time. No, no, no, no, no.

That's not true. That's not true. You know what, actually, Eugene? I think this is a great idea. Really quickly, tell us the issues that you're dealing with. Littering? Yeah, and then we could do this video. Yeah, but really let us know.

If you could just like, So that way at the end of this, we go, okay, we know how to do it. So what are the issues with these people you're seeing? Okay, listen, you see that little strip of gravel when you look down over your balcony? That belongs to somebody else. That's not for the property pickup. So stop littering. Stop throwing your beer cans.

I did send some videos over about this. Can we see the videos? Bear pong. I did send them in. You don't have to look at them now. But, I mean, it's a lot. It's, I mean, I just, a guy pissing over the balcony. Like, if I'm trying to walk to my car, I can't handle it.

So, Jane, let's do this. Let's give it a shot. And then we're going to do a take and then we're going to get notes from you. And if we nail this thing, Nat Attack and Jesse will look into what it costs to get a just a piece of paper or like a material that could

survive the weather. Yeah, printed Yeah, a weatherproof build or. You guys could glue it on. That would be on you guys to get it up there. And then you guys

with spray paint would have to write hey, everyone in that building look at this, scan this code. I got a video for you, right? And then what we need to remember during the recording of this

is while we're sort of sending a message to these people, It's also a marketing video for the show. Is that right, Eugene? No, I think it's great marketing for the show. I've been telling everyone about it. Eugene, here's what we're going to do. And I've never done this as a control freak.

Gareth can tell you this. Oh, here we go. Here we go. A big dog, you a top dog from me. You're a lieutenant, okay? You're running point, my lady, my queen. We're living in your world. Oh, boy, howdy are we?

You're the director. I mean, this went far. This went far. You're the director. We're your talent. Yeah. Run the show. Tell us what to do.

Call action. Call cut. Give us notes. The floor is yours. You're in charge. We are not running point. When we nail what you wanted, say, Natalie, cut, print, make a QR code. If this all goes sideways,

you, Jean? Gareth and I are not here to help you. You're the boss. I'm hypervile. I'm hypervile, I think. Okay. Do I say 321X? You're the boss.

You'll count down into action. Sure. Okay. 321X. You just scanned a QR code that you saw on a roof because you are visiting Nashville and you're partying a little bit, yeah? Yeah, and you think you're having a great time. Pass.

Pass. Pass. Pass. Okay. What would you like from Jake differently, please? Okay. Okay. Okay. So we're trying not to become a target because this started when this building went under construction and a piece of lumber went through and almost killed a neighbor. Oh. I do have pictures of that as well that I've been in. Pass. But I want, I know, it's a lot. But I want us to be super friendly. Okay.

You guys are so funny that you can take this down a notch. Because I feel like if I painted a middle finger on that rooftop, that's not going to be good because they throw clothes, they throw wet towels. They, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, people next door are like savages. So if they see a QR code and they see the video like, hey guys, welcome to Nashville. We want you to have a good time. We love a good time.

But please remember to not take a vacation from your trash can or your ice tray. Okay. So that's what you're looking for for James performance a little more. Well, from either one of you. You want to do it? funny, I would love both of you to do it because I love both of you together.

So you're the director. I'll start her jumping. Yep. And then Don't be afraid to yell pass again whenever you're ready. You're the boss. Let us know what to do. I'm sorry I did that earlier. Please, no, it got better. We thank you.

You the big dog, we're just a couple of kids. Okay. Here we are. Rup, meow, meow. Eugene, you want to count us down into an action whatever you ready? The dog wants to. If not, she can do whatever the fuck she wants. Okay.

We're living in her world. Let's get this. Yeah, I just snorted. I just snorted. It's fine. It's fine. All right. Whenever you're ready.

Three, two, one, pig limo. Very good. Hey, everybody. I hope you're enjoying Nashville. What a great city, and we're really glad you're here having a lot of fun. The city offers a lot, and you're staying in a great place. My name is Jake Johnson. I'm Gareth Reynolds. We have a podcast called We're Here to Help.

Maybe you should listen to it. But what we want to talk to you about today is if you look out your balcony and you see down there, it looks like just a rooftop. But there's a family that lives there. Yeah, and so your impulse might be, hey, I'm on vacation. I'll throw some trash down there. Maybe I'll have a couple pops and pee. But don't do that. Because you're pissing on a woman's head and where she lives. And if you throw filthy laundry over, it's going into her property. So you could do us a big favor and take that volume down to a three or a four. And just remember these fun people want you to have a great time. They're happy you're here.

But could you remember they live here year round? Your neighbors right now. I know it feels like you're not, but you are. And remember, we're here to help is available wherever you listen to podcast. Thanks for clicking on the roof's QR code and going to this website and watching this video. And last but not least, your neighbor, Eugene. has the message for you. Eugene, take it away. I love you guys so much, and I want you to have a great time,

but I'd like you to stop shitting on our property. Okay, dokey. Thanks so much. Eugene, what do you think? I thought that was fantastic. Okay, you want to use it? I really liked your part of the end. You killed it, Eugene.

Yeah, that was awesome. When you asked them to knock. I mean, how did y'all feel about it? I thought it was very good. I thought our performance was fine. I thought it was good. We were trying to find it was okay. I think we found it.

Yeah. Then I think you hit a home run. Natalie, why did you flick us off? I don't get it. Jake, let her talk. Stop interrupting her. So she gave you the universal move it on, just so you know, Eugene.

Continue. She's like, keep going. She goes like this. She gave us to wrap it up. Then I asked, she denied. and said I was interrupting you. Keep going, you, Gene. And there was a finger. Well, she will appreciate this. I don't think so. So we got it at the last minute, and we rescheduled.

So it was supposed to be for July 2nd. And I was like, I do not care. I'm so excited to be here for this. So I immediately called the owner of the building. And I said, do whatever you want. And so I sent in a screen. You think that it could be good marketing. You put a finger on there. That's the wrong idea.

Correct. But I sent in a picture because I called him and he called me back. And he was like, I think they got the transcript wrong on this voicemail. Let's see it. So, yes. So I called him and said, hey, listen, this is happening tomorrow. I need you to call me. I've got some amazing news.

And so he called. hold me back, but then there was a transcript of the voicemail, and he was like, I think they got something wrong. Yes. You want me to tell the audience what it was? Read it, Gareth. I would love for you to do that. Jim, I have some amazing nipples, and I'm freaking out a little bit.

Thank you guys so much. Enjoy it. God bless. Bye, Eugene. Bye, Gene. I love your goods. Bye. And we're brought to you by Wayfair.

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It's all right. Thank you. That's awesome. What's your name, Amigo? My name is Nick. Hi, Nick. Nick, where are you calling from? I'm calling from the Plymouth, Massachusetts area. Whoa. It's pretty close to where our guest helper is from. Oh, boy. How old are you, Nick? I'm 39. 39. Well, Nick, listen, you got myself and you got our guest helper today. The great Ryan Gall is here. Ryan. Ryan, one of my dearest friends from back in the improv days still doing improv. And it's become popular.

I quit doing it for stand-up and then now improv's popular again. Is it me? And now I'm not good at it. Now I'm not good at it. So I don't believe that. I don't great at it back of the day. But now I'm not good at it.

That's not true. We just did it like a month ago and you were great at it. I would say you stole the show. Because you. because you're good at it. But we have Ryan Gall here. You know him from tons of shit.

But Ryan, this is Nick. You have any questions for Nick? Hi, Ryan. Off the bat, Ryan? No, Plymouth. I did, I got drunk in Plymouth. Probably one of the first times I ever got drunk. I got drunk in Plymouth, so I can give you that.

How old? Fantastic. Oh, God. I was definitely late teens. It took me a while. I wasn't like you, Gareth, where I was, ripping into it

and the preteens it was because I was in England the English people started out early I will get to your call in a second of here Nick but I've

said this in my stand-up before but I remember I was 13 and guys my age were making fun of me for being a virgin God it's insane

they were like well you're waiting for marriage I was like I'm a baby Oh, my God. Hey, Nick, are you right off Route 3?

So I'm off 495. Okay. Yeah. Yeah. Used to be off route 3, but I made the move. You had to. You had to. All right, Nick.

Yeah, that case on traffic will get you. What's going on, buddy? We're not going to do traffic. We're not going to do local traffic talk. You don't want a traffic report? No. I'm hoping you guys can help me out. I've tried to farm this from my wife who's a therapist.

I've brought it up to my own therapist. I'm hoping you guys can crack a little here. Hold on a second here. Now, this, we're normally, sometimes we're on this show an alternative to therapy. Sure. But I don't know if we're normally following therapists. If two therapists, one, you're married to, and they can't crack this, this is Ryan's ceiling. We're batting third.

I think we're, how I say it. We're dead metal. No, I don't like, I don't like their answers. So I'm going to go with what you guys say. And if you have the same answer as then, then so be it. That's the way it is. All right, Nick, let's party. Makes sense.

All right. So we've been in this house about two years. We had new neighbors move in just about a year ago. And recently we decided it was probably time to get to know them, introduce ourselves. And we've gotten to know them a little bit. The first time they came over, we started just talking about our yards.

We have pretty decent-sized yards, and they're both pretty much the exact same-sized lot. And, you know, I told them I've got this hand-me-down push mower that barely works. It is absolute hell to mow this lawn. It takes me probably three hours. And he was telling me that the guy who sold in his house gave him a ride-on mower,

and that I can use it whenever I want. The caveat is it just doesn't work right now. And so I told them that's great. So we recently had them over for just some dinner and hanging out by the pool. And they brought it up two or three times the fact that they have a ride on mower. They're going to get it fixed. I can use it whenever I want. They'll even give me the key to their shed.

So I can take it out whenever they're not home. And then they saw me not long ago pushing my mower and reminded me of this again that I can use it whenever I want. Sounds like they've said you could use it whenever you want. Yeah, I know, right? So here's where it gets tricky, is that I recently made the decision to buy a ride-on mower. And it's brand new. I kind of went, you know, balls to the wall, got the nicest one I could find.

And I don't want to let them use it because it's brand new. And I don't have a lot of nice things and it's quite the investment. and now I don't want to mow my own lawn because I don't want them to see me on this working right-on mower and then expect me to kind of come over and offer it up to them to mow their enormous lawn because their ride-on doesn't work when they've been so kind to offer me their non-working ride-on mower. Ooh, wow. Okay, so this is interesting. So the neighbors, let's give, let's, let's give, what can we?

Should we just give them a name like a couple, let's call them like the parks or something like that? Yeah, we're going to the parks. Okay. So the parks. The parks next door, bought the place, right on mower, doesn't work. They won't shut the fuck up about how much they're going to let you use it once they pull the trigger and get this thing fixed. You may be. Their kindness knows no bounds.

You may be a little fatigued from just being teased. by the prospect of being able to have the right on mower, eventually just say, you know what, I'm going to take care of me a little bit, I'm going to move into the next century, and I'm going to get myself a ride on mower. Now you're, the problem that's going on in your head, you have anxiety about using it

because you think that will result in them asking if they can use yours, and frankly, you care about yours a little too much at this point to be sharing it, with them. That's basically where we're at. Yeah. You hit the nail on the head? That's tricky. Interest. Now, I will say, Ryan, this problem

kind of lives in his head a little bit. Right? I mean, he's got a paranoia about the what-if. There's not even really a problem yet. They haven't asked. They haven't even come close to asking. He wants to get ahead of a problem that he sees coming. Now, Nick, you've never used your ride on mower? I took it for one quick spin when the guy dropped it off, but it was behind a fence. And, I mean, everyone uses their ride-on mower here.

How long ago was this? This was probably three weeks ago at this point. So three weeks, you've had a corvette of ride-on lawn mowers in your garage, and you just can't even take it out for a spin because you're worried about what's going to happen. You want an excuse in the chamber, ready to go, as soon as this is. guy's like, hey, this is perfect. I'm letting you, I offered to let you use my mower. Maybe we, you offer

me and we just have a deal. We can switch them up whenever we want. You want to be able to say something right off the bat and be like, here's X. You can't, yeah. I have a weird, I have a little weird thought. Okay. Let's float it out there because I'm a little, I've got some ideas, but go ahead. Do you have,

are your parents still with us? My mom is alive. My dad is super dead. Super dead. Ooh. Super dead. Yeah.

He's nothing but bones. How about the in-laws? In-laws, both very much alive. Okay. Here we go. This is my very stupid pitch, hopefully the first of a few. Okay. You received this lawnmower as a gift from your father-in-law with a caveat.

it's only for you to use. Your wife can't use it. Nobody else is allowed to use it. That's it. Simple. And maybe it's because it used to, he bought it for himself. He no longer can use it.

He wants to give it to you, but he's very, and you can say this, you can kind of throw him under the bus and say, he's kind of weird about this stuff. You know, he doesn't, he'll give,

he's given me a few things in the past, and he's like, it's only for you. Don't, I don't know, maybe somewhere down, before he gets screwed on this, where he gave something to his other son, and they gave it away.

So now he's real particular about saying, this is for you. It's the corvette of lawnmowers. Don't you dare let anybody else use it? I want to see you on this and you only. And you kind of smirk and go like, that's, that's dad. That's dad.

Well, Ryan's pitching, which I think is kind of the zone we have to go in, is like it's, you've got to get, Ryan, by the way, left. I don't know if that's going to upset you or not, Nick, but Ryan is no longer on camera or in frame. I hope it wasn't something I said. I didn't talk, and then he left, so I don't know.

Oh, hey. Back. I just mowed the lawn. Oh, my God. So let me ask you a couple questions, Nick. What did your therapist say? So both my wife and my therapist both said the same thing. They just kind of threw their hands up and said,

well, I guess they need to use the lawnmower now. And the problem with lawn equipment is that it's not rated by mile. It's rated by hours used. So the more hours, the more wear and tear. I mean, listen, here's why you've called the right place, and I think here's what the therapists cannot provide. We want you to win on your terms. We are, let's say this is some sort of mental dysfunction on your end.

You're not going to hear about that from us. We're going to try to solve. We're playing an away game in Nick Park. And we're going to want this to work out. So we're going to, I have a couple more pitches. Let me ask you this. Do you like the parks? Do you like the neighbors?

Oh, we love them. They're great. We can't say enough good things about them. Well, actually, there is one negative. They're too kind. You don't want them to touch your goddamn lawnmower. So there's clearly something there. You've got to keep their grubby hands off of it.

Yeah, you've got an issue with them there. Here's a question. Did they expect you, like, if you were to choose to use their riding lawnmower, were they kind of hinting at the idea of like, if you get it fixed and tuned up, it'll work? Because you couldn't use it, right? It's broken. Right.

Yeah, it was kind of like, you know, one of those offers, like if I had a bunch of money, I give you that money, but I don't have a bunch of money, so I'm not going to. It was kind of, you know, it was thoughtful, but incense hollow. How have they been mowing their lawn? Hmm. That's a good question. I think they have a push mower.

I think they've been just kind of dealing with the grind of mowing, like, over a half acre. Did you, have you seen the riding lawnmower in the shed? Do we, are we sure? I think I saw the, I think I saw the previous owner riding it. at some point before they had moved in. So I do know that it is real. I know they didn't make it up in hopes that I would fund their ride on mower. Now, that would be crazy.

Their mower, their mower now, like their lawn now is out of control. It must be, right? I think they're only mowing the front lawn, and it's much smaller than the back, and I think they're just using the push mower for that. It's manageable on the front. It's in the backyard where it gets really unhinged. They're drooling over the idea. that you're buying a mower.

They have to be. I've got a pitch for you here, Nick. Now, I'm going to tell you that this pitch is going to take you, because look, there is this version where, you know, you could talk about how, I mean, you could wait for them to be gone and only mow the lawn when they're gone, you know, but you're going to be living a bit of a complicated life if you have to create a kind of affair with your lawnmower.

And I just think that's going to be more stress than it's worth. Now, my pitch at first, it's going to feel like we're not solving your problem. But this is the long game, okay? Okay. My pitch is that you go out there and you just start mowing your lawn. You use the riding mower. You don't even mention it, okay? You just enjoy yourself.

And if when you hang out with them, you know, I think you're right. to think that at some point they're going to say, hey, you really got to love it? And oh my God, and I think you've got to say, I love it. This thing is my baby. And you have your wife teed up. And she says, he loves this thing more than the car. And you go, I do.

I care about this thing so much. Put value on it in a way that would make, like, again, this is new. This is a new luxury item for you. And the more that you lay that on thick, the more that I think they'll go, I don't know if I even want that responsibility. Now, Nikki's still there. I'm here.

Because what might happen is these people might not take the social cue. And they might say, oh, that's awesome. Can I borrow it? And I think we're right in the predicament that you're talking to your theory. You're talking to people about. And in my pitch, what you say is,

Yes. Yes. Just be so careful with it. And then they are going to use it. And Nick, when the parks return it, you're going to say to them two days later, did something happen out there when you mowed the lawn? And they're going to go, no. What? And you're going to say, the blade won't drop properly. I'm just trying to figure out what happened because I'm so careful with it. And then you fake bring out a repair person. and then you talk to him about it, and you say a repair person came out and said that a rock hit it, and it's a big pain in the ass, and it's costing you a couple hundred bucks. And that is the last time they asked for it, and if they ask for it again,

you're going to say, I'd love to, but I'm so precious with this thing that I just don't want another rock. That's real good. Can I give a... Yes. On top of that? Cherry the top, babe.

I love what you're saying about he loving it so much. this is your baby. Like we should see you in your driveway I want you to put on some jorts and a cutoff and I want you to wash this thing like it's a

Corvette. Cleaning it. Waxing it. Waxing it. Now, waxing it. This is my name. Ryan, dare I say, I want a vanity plate on this thing. Who's going to say?

Daddy's baby. Okay. On top of that. Does your does your wife ever talk to Mrs. Park like one-on-one alone? So here's the weird small world kicker of it. They're both actually from the same small town.

Perfect. And they found out on Facebook they've got like 70 mutual friends. So they're so tied into each other that it doesn't even make sense. And to add one ripple to Ryan's first pitch, my in-laws actually met them first. They came over to introduce themselves. when my wife and I were away for the weekend. My in-laws invited them in. They met our dog.

They just had a gab fest, talking about the town that they're from. Ryan, can I tell you how I know that Nick loves his dog? This is a way you can tell if someone loves their dog. They say they met the dog. People, it's always, it's like the mayor of the house. They met the dog. Always makes me giggle.

They met the dog. They got introduced. Wait, wait. I was saying, if your, if your wives talk, um, to have, maybe you plant something and say like, uh, I got in a huge fight. Wait, this is your wife. I got in a huge fight. I, um, I was walking through the garage and I, I bumped his new mower. He went, he hasn't talked to me for a day. Um, and just subtle and just, it's going along with what you're saying, but it's like that, if he, if you get mad at your wife over it,

imagine what he did the neighbors. I actually think, Nick, we're kind of giving you a, it's kind of a chronology of what ifs and how you can get in front of it each step. And it's going to depend on their social cue radar. But I actually think Ryan's pitch comes before my pitch and maybe shuts down my pitch with hope. Maybe my pitch is never even needed because either your wife, tell you. tells Mrs. Park or the parks in general that, you know, I thought I'd take it out and mow the lawn. And I guess I, like, I didn't do it right.

I got it stuck. And he was really upset. I mean, he loves this thing, you know. And that way, that makes them feel like, I don't, I don't even want the stress of asking him to borrow that. I don't want to get involved. Now, let's say that they go, oh, that's great. And he says, can I borrow it? You know, you might have to do my version,

but I kind of think Ryan's version of my pitch is going to get you where you need to go. Yeah, you might never get there. I like that. Now, we don't want to put anything on your wife, you know, but do you think she could pull off the fake convo? I think she could. Is she there?

She is downstate. The dog, the mayor of the house may go crazy if she comes upstairs. I can't wait to meet him. All right. You want to throw Molly on real quick here, Nick? Happy to. Here you go. Okay.

Hello. Molly, how are you? Hi, Molly. I'm good. How are you guys? I'm good. You're on with me, Gareth, from we're here to help. And our guest helpers, Ryan Gall.

You've probably heard him on comedy bang, bang. He's doing very well in the improv world. I used to do improv, and then I thought it was dead. and then I took a time away and now it's thriving again. Anyway, that's not about me and how well Ryan's doing. First of all, Molly, when Nick brought this problem to you as a therapist, what did you think? Were you able to separate wife from therapist or were you,

what was your initial reaction to this? Well, as a therapist, ethically, I do try to separate the two. But, yeah, I mean, I do what I can. I mean, I think I have a bias where he is my husband and I am neighbors with the, you know, other party here. So what, uh, what did you say to him when he, when he kind of brought this paranoia? And, and you feel like, I mean, he really loves this mower. He does not want it over there.

I hear you. I know. You've heard. Yeah. I mean, um, no, I get it. It's his. I know he's like, you know, it's his pup. It's his favorite.

So I, I get it. But I think. He doesn't want the neighbors to meet the lawn. mower. No, right. Right. And listen, to be fair, like they seem like very nice people, but we really don't know them too well. Like, in the event it were to break, we don't know how, like, it could get messy.

We don't really know, like, how things would be handled. So I hear the concerns. Molly, let's be honest, this lawnmower that they have in their garage, last we heard before they moved in, was working, and now it isn't. So they might just be a couple of, you know, lunatics out there. thing. That's true. I mean, Molly, we've circled a couple of things.

And unfortunately for you, to some extent, the one that Nick likes is kind of the one that we like. It started as the idea that maybe we loan it to them. And when they return it, we fake that something's wrong. And it kind of gets Nick off the hook. That's where we started. But Ryan kind of came up with maybe a better way. to crack it. Now, it does put a little bit on you, but we all have talked and we feel pretty

confident you can pull it off, but we don't want to just tell Nick what to tell you what to do. It's not, this isn't the honeymooners. Yeah. How comfortable would you be, not lying. Ryan, it's Ryan's pitch. So Ryan, why don't, Ryan, why don't you walk Molly through the ass here and let's see what we can do? So going back to when when Nick first got this mower, um, you, you, could immediately, apparently, according to Nick, you could immediately tell how protective he was of it. He mentioned you wanting to take a ride on it and him feeling a little uncomfortable

about that. And he let you. Right. He did. He did. You know, you was not, you know, he wasn't like over the moon about the idea, though. Yeah. He's not letting you take a run over the- correct. But I didn't push it. I understood. I think I was respectful of the boundaries. Well, the beauty of this one is you don't push it. This is a- rider. All right. There you go. There you go.

So here would be the plan is somewhere organically when you're talking to, we're calling them the parks, Mrs. Park, one-on-one. You might mention to her, you know, like, you know, Nick and I got in a little fight last night. So just quickly, Nick takes it out. Nick takes the lawnmower out for a ride. the neighbors now know, you've all stepped up, you have the bigger motor. Go ahead, Rice.

Yep. So you would just mention, you know, maybe there was a little squirmish, a little battle over this because we can be flexible on how this came up, but you might have walked through the garage or gotten something out of the shed wherever you store this machine and you bumped it in the wrong way. And there's the tiniest little scratch on it, tiny, like not even noticeable to anyone except you admitted it to him and he went off the handle and just really froze up and got sad about it because this is his baby. Or, well, before we jump in, I want to point out that Ryan did come up with a new word, which is squirmish.

Yeah. You've never heard the word squirm. Like when someone squirms and then you have a fight with them. It's a squirming skirmish. It's a squirmish. Yeah. Or maybe hear Molly the pitches, you did take it out. for a spin and you hit a rock and he was not, I mean, again, we don't want to make it seem

like the parks are like, what the hell's going on in that house over it? But we definitely want you to enjoy to say, I mean, you guys, like my husband loves his lawnmower more than he loves me right now. I hit a rock and he was like, he thinks he needs to call a repair guy. I mean, he's really, he really cares about this lawnmower. Okay. I mean, I think I like the scratch approach a little better, to be honest. I don't love the idea of me being like the dumb girl that can't mow the lawn, hit a rock type of.

That's what I was saying, Gareth. Yeah. Oh, yeah. I just want to point out that this pitch works for non-binary or any gender. Yes, no, no, for sure. I don't have an agenda. Okay. Okay.

Okay. I think that now, okay, now do we feel, how do we feel about that, Ryan? That's your initial pitch. I like it. Molly. I was going to say just to make sure that nobody thinks you guys are getting in like any major battles, that it's more like he's giving you the silent treatment. He's giving you a little bit of the cold children.

And it lasted like a day, but it was like, God, he's. It's funny. It's a little funny to you. Yeah. That's a good way of trouble. So Molly. Now that time has passed. Yes.

Yes. Now we're back, but boy, I'll tell you one thing I'm not going to do is walk within a foot of that lawnmower. That's aware. Yeah. Okay. I tell you. Okay. You feel okay about that, Molly? I do. I do. I do that. Do you mind if we let's prep this? This is helpful on the show sometimes. I don't know if you listen to this show, but it's a hell of a show. But I think that's a no. And what I would say is let's have Ryan play Mrs. Park. I'll play Mr. Park.

I'm not going to be featured as much because I don't get a lot of acting work, so I really kind of, I go crazy in these. And Molly, you be you. And let's see how it goes if you're talking to the parks about this situation. And is Nick still there? Nick is here.

Okay, so Nick can hear your side of it so that we can get a feel of how this is going to go. And then we'll talk schedule of when we're going to do this. And then I think we're going to solve this problem. So Ryan, Mrs. Park, I'm Mr. Park. Molly or you. And let's just start. I guess maybe Molly you're over there for some reason.

You're having a drink when Nick's not there, maybe something like that. Sure. Okay. All right. Let's say that happens. Maybe you bring something over. You bring over a little wine or something. Okay.

Okay. So, hi, Molly. Hi, Molly. Hey, how's it going? Get in here and sit down. Take a load off. Please take a load off. Thank you for the wine.

Oh, hey, anytime. I hope you like Rose. All day. She's always saying that. I'll be in here. Gosh. So how are things? What's going on? So I don't know if you saw that Nick actually got a new mower recently, the ride on one that we've been talking about. We saw that. I did see that. I came back in real quick, but I did see that.

We love it. We love the color. It looks amazing. It looks bright. Oh, yeah. It's great. Great orange. Well, I will tell you, I will say I cannot go anywhere near that thing anymore.

I accidentally scratched it and he was so pissed. Oh, no. Oh, no. Oh, my gosh. We were just going to. It's so funny. It's not even worth bringing it up. But yeah.

Go ahead. We were going to ask if. if you guys were opening up to the neighborhood, if you know what I mean. You know, I'll be honest. It was something that I think we would have been maybe open to, but now seeing that reaction once I scratch. I mean, I barely tapped it, but it's, you couldn't even see it. But I'll have to show you that.

He couldn't have gone that crazy, though. He couldn't have gone that nuts. It's just a scratch. Oh, you'd be surprised. What did he say, Molly? Quote him. I'd rather not, you guys. You know, it was in the heat of the moment.

But everything's fine, you know, it's just, like I say, yeah, I don't want to even go there with him again. Honey. I'm right here, babe. I'm right here. More wine, please. You drank all that rosé. It was crazy. She's not doing, she has her bad days, Molly.

Molly, I think that was great. That was great. Now, Ryan, what was the thing that we gave ourselves the great? the great gesture on. It was that she, how did you get it out that, you preempted it? You were like,

yeah. She was like, I would have done. We would have loaned it out. We would have loaned it out. You kind of got ahead of it, which I think is great. Yeah.

That was, you know, I don't want to paint him in a light that he's, you know, just, just mad. I think it's a little funny,

too. It's like a little, it's a little, it's a little, like, funny that it's like, geez, he's crazy about this thing. Yeah, he's not a half. Your energy was perfect on that because you weren't, you weren't making him look too crazy, but there was a hint of like, you don't want to get involved in this.

Molly, you feel like you can do this and we'll do this? I think so. Okay. All right. You're fantastic. You nailed it. Can you throw Nick back on the phone? Because he was the awesome.

We just want to make sure. Yeah. But great work. We're going to talk scheduling with Nick real quick. Sounds good. Have a good one. All right. Thank you. She nailed it. Nailed it. Nick.

She's better than me. Nick, she's better than you. I don't want to say it. I know. Believe me, she's the A side. Yeah, she's completely. She's the A and the B side. The label didn't even want you to get out there. It's true.

I'm just some torn up CDR just off in the corner. Completely. So do you feel good about her performance and how she just did that, Nick? I do. I feel great. I feel great about it. She knocked it out of the park. When are we going to have her go over there and do this?

Because the day before, let's have you mow the lawn on the running mower. I mean, we can do it this weekend. I mean, it's the perfect weekend for it. Okay. So here's what I say. Last thing. What if Molly invites her over for a glass of wine while you're mowing the lawn? that way you're sure

that way you're sure she sees I guess you don't know about the husband though I don't hate it I worry that I just worry we're pulling off a big production

but I don't hate it what's nice about it is you're nowhere in ear shot and there's a you know what you okay Ryan what we could do he starts mowing the lawn

halfway through Molly comes over with a bottle of wine can you hear the thing we got next door? Yeah, he's mowing the lawn. He loves this thing. It's maybe an easier in. I don't know.

And you take away that window in case if he's mowing the lawn. If Nick is mowing the lawn, they could walk over right then. You are taking a gamble in that little window. It is psychotic within nine hours. They're like, can we borrow it? You guys are out of control.

You just beat me out on my lawn as if you can use it next. He's going to put a quarter on the dad's for it. Molly, places. I got next. Yeah. Well, what do you think, Nick? We kind of have laid this out pretty, in a couple of ways. What way do you want to do?

What way are you going to go with it? I think I like what you just laid out, which was, you know, her bringing up, that she may have scratched it and that I was not pumped about it. And I'm okay with the fact that I'm more worried about the scratch than I am my neighbor. thinking I'm irrationally angry about things. I have a therapist. She's a therapist too. It's fine. I'm getting it worked out.

But I think that that is probably the best approach. Because like you said at the top, this is a problem that I have created in my own mind. And I'm just trying to mitigate any what if that comes across in this situation. I'm trying to nip this in the bud and make sure that they just never want to even look at it. This is a full bud nipping. Yeah. Okay, so can we mow the lawn tomorrow afternoon?

And then can we have Molly go over there evening or Sunday? I think so. I think that's very realistic. I feel good to go here. Yeah, I feel great. Okay. All right. Well, Nick, keep us posted.

Let us know how it goes. I absolutely will. Buddy boy, you enjoy that mower, okay? Because it sounds like you've got two soulmates in that house. And, yes, and one of them is the mower. Yeah, that's right. All right, buddy, boy. Go get them.

Thanks, Nick. All right, thanks, fella. Thanks. Bye. Hello. Hi. Hi. How are you?

I'm good. How are you? Good. We know you're a follow-up. What's your name? For that call, we were using Stella, but I've been told I can break an amenity. name is Christina. Still at,

well, still nothing's jumping. Are you? Do you? No. Oh, yeah, me either. Okay, what was the first call? Christina. My daughter has a sixth toe.

Oh, right. Lamorne and Hannah were on that call. Right. I've seen a clip from this call, I believe. What was the problem exactly? So the problem started. when she didn't want to go get a pedicure when we had some family in town

and we were doing girl time and she expressed that she was just uncomfortable with the sixth toe always being commented on so they were pitching some ideas about how to handle that. And there was a whole thing about the toe's name.

Yeah, the whole bit of it was and this kid should lead out on it. Uh-huh. And if somebody goes like, whoa, you have a sixth toe, be shocked. Uh-huh. Sorry. Make a joke, name it something.

Just get in front of the joke. Right. What did you end up doing or what did she end up doing? How's she doing and what's happening? Um, she's doing well. She still has not gotten a pedicure, but she's been more open to that.

Um, because she tried to do it herself and it looks pretty tragic. So we're going to get that done eventually. Um, But she did have her toes out because we live in southeast and Virginia. It gets really hot here. And there were comments made at school and she had, I guess she's renamed it. But I do have her here if you wanted to talk to her.

Yeah, of course. Charlotte, here you go. Hi. What's up, Charlotte? Hi, Charlotte. Hi. So give us an update. What's going on from your POV on this?

Where are we at? We're catching up to you. Oh, okay. Great clearing up the throat. Speech is covered. Foy's going on. So I went to school and it was like the last day of school. Like one of the last days of school.

and somehow like my teacher and having money in my class I can't remember how they found out that I had an extra toe The teacher did And um They were all like

Oh let me see it let me see it And I'm like no And they were all like Well like you don't even have to show us You can just take a photo And like Let's show it to us real quick Also we

I wasn't really feeling the vibe Of my toes name And um My friend came up with a new one, and she's really big on basketball players. So my chosen new name is Toby Bryant. Listen, Charlotte, I'm going to tell you right now. That's awesome.

That's awesome. So what about this? If they say, can we see, you say, Toby Bryant isn't doing photos right now? What about Toby Shy or Toby is not interested in seeing them? but going back to personal so it's not you if you get in that situation

again there's a bunch of kids going like let me see it let me and you're like this was turning into a goddamn nightmare then you go guys if it were up to me I would and they go what

you simply are Toby's manager Toby said no guys I would love Madonna to come out of this hotel room and greet you. Madonna ain't coming out. You're stuck with me, Jerry. You want to see me, Vogue, guys.

If not, back it up and head home. Tog. I agree. I mean, I feel like you're... Toby Bryant's incredible. It's phenomenal. All I want to do is beat it, and I can't. Try.

Tony Hawk. Toby Hawk. Toie Hawk. Toie Hawk's pretty good. Or how about... The little guy with the crutch? Tiny toe Tiny toe

Also good What did he say? What did he want to eat? To Pesci? Top Pesci's pretty Be careful with Topeche Why? Kick your ass

Who will Topesci? Okay He stab you in the neck Who's that? Joe Pesci That's part of the problem here too Charlotte is we're old people

Top Biscopo Jesus Christ How did you get Oh, To Biden Joe Biden Charlotte President To Biden can be great

Your foot is President To Biden is asleep. You may get Joe Biden sleeping jokes. Sleepy Toe. I got Sleepy Toe Biden here. He just fell asleep. So Biden. To Biden's real good, Charlotte. That's what I would keep doing is keep renaming it.

I think so, too. Rotate the name. There can be a lot of toe puns. I'm available to pitch on these if you need an email every now and then. But I think this would be an honor. I want you to be celebrities, though. It needs to stick on the. Yeah.

To Biden? He was the last president. She said celebrity. To Biden's a celebrity, Charlotte. Toe Biden's in first. No, no, no, I know. No, I know. Sorry to yell at you. It's good to meet you. What are you saying? What?

What are you saying about what are your, the toe needs to be a celebrity? How do you like it in this back and forth? How do you think it's going for you right now? Say that again, Charlotte. Sorry, an idiot was talking. I said yes, the to be a celebrity. Agreed. Yeah, I agree.

And I'm supporting my friend here who just attacked me for no reason. Toe Biden is a great one. Agreed. How are you feeling, kid? Where are you at? How's your summer going? This is good. It's good.

It's good. Is there anything in this follow-up weekend pitch you on or talk to her? Do you just want to tell us? Things are going good and you are calling your to- There was another interaction I forgot. I just remembered. Do you want to tell us, Charlotte? and do you want advice on it?

What do you want to do? You're the boss. No, I just want to tell you guys. Tell us. I was out of Waterpark, and this kid came behind me and my group of friends. We turned around, just talking, and then we look down. He has four toes, and I have six. Whoa.

So we go to him, I'm like, do you want one of my toes? We can both have the correct amount of toes. And it was just like this whole joke. It's pretty good. What did he say? Was he cool with that? Yeah, he was just like, he's just talking about it. Did he have kind of like broccoli hair, that like permie kind of top?

What? His hair. That's a crazy question. So Charlotte, thanks for calling in. No, we're good. Did he have that like curly hair that all the kids your age have, that like mop top? No, it was like, it was like an eight-year-old. Oh, he's a little guy.

He's tiny. Tiny toe Charlotte, listen, this is great You're in a great spot Quiet, Jake, you're in a great spot I think you're fine Here's what I'll say If you ever need to rename the toe

Email the show We'll toe pitch She's pretty good I think she's got that Yeah Okay Yeah But I think she comes up with good way

Tell what happened to your fingers Tell it why you have tape on your fingers I desiccated my finger Playing Beach volleyball with a bunch of ladies and children And then what happened? I put it back in place I didn't tell anyone Because I was embarrassed

And now? It's hurting really bad, so I have tape on it to remind myself to stop using it. That's who you're listening to right now, Charlotte. Charlotte, it was great to hear from you. You're doing great. We might be calling you for advice soon. If you have a show, we're going to call it. You seem to be handling life really well.

Yeah, you're handling situations in a good way. All right, Charlotte, thanks so much. Bye. Do better than us. Bye, guys. Thanks, guys. All right, bye, Christina. Bye.

Bye. Bye. Hi guys. Love the podcast. Got me through loads of sleepless nights when I had my baby earlier this year. I wanted to hop on though and say this to anyone who hasn't followed up. Please follow up. For those of us who are listening religiously, we need to know what's going on with you. And secondly, pay the tab for your fun uncles. It's the least you can do. It's the least you can do for these guys. So please follow up. Okay, I mean it. Everybody, check out our show on Hulu. It drops a day early, and there's also Back Catalog episode. That's right. So we're here to help is now on Hulu a day early. If you want to listen to the back catalog, we're dropping those from season one and season two.

It's just join us. Let's go. We're Here to Help is hosted by Jake John. Johnson and Gareth Reynolds. If you'd like to be on the show, please email us your question at helpful pod at gmail.com. And if you want to watch video episodes

of we're here to help, you can go to our Patreon at patreon.com slash here to help pod to see our entire catalog. We're Here to Help is produced by Rabbit Grimm Productions, executive producers Rob Hollis, Jeff Porter and Natalie Hollis, Associate producer Jesse Thurston,

editing mix and master by Chris Foller. The song by Oliver Raleigh. The cover artwork is by James Fostike, animations by Andrew Strelecki. And if you'd like to see Gareth, you stand up on the road, go to garethrethrenolds.com. Remember all of the advice given on we're here to help is for entertainment purposes only, and all listeners should be adults and make their own decisions. That was a hate gum podcast. That was a hate gum podcast.

What's up, everybody? I'm Kyle Mooney. And what's up, everybody? I'm back by. And man, ooh, we got something to tell you. Yeah, we definitely do. Yes, it's a brand new podcast on Headgum. That's right, and it's called What's Our Podcast? Yep, and that's because we don't have a single idea what our podcast you'd be about. Yeah, we don't.

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