Who Knows? Who Cares. - Missionary Sex Equals Love.

Episode Date: July 26, 2023

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That's how you don't shit your pants, but you shit into your pants. Okay, that's fair. Don't lie. Yeah. I'm like, oh, like, are you wet right now? I didn't. I didn't. You know what Mo said?

Here we go. Are you fully bricked up after kissing? No, you're not. On air. Like, yes, exactly, yeah. I already have one of those in my cart. Yeah. I really do.

When that button gets pressed, that shit goes on. Yeah. All right. That's how it should go. I'll set that up for you. 53? Something like that. 53.

Too many. Over a year. Not enough. Three too many. Not enough. Three too many. 52. Okay, 52. Two too many. Yeah enough. Three too many. 52. 52.

Two too many. Yeah. I'm happy to be here. I'm happy to be here. I'm happy to be here with our editor for a little while. Yeah.

While we have him. While we have him. Just our cameraman, really. It feels so much more at home when you're here. It just doesn't feel the same. I know. It does not feel the same.

When we replace you, we're going to have somebody that doesn't know our inside jokes. What are we going to do? They don't know anything, man. Just wait until there's a baby in this house. Then we won't even be able to record do? They don't know anything, man. Just wait until there's a baby in this house. Then we won't even be able to record.

No, that's not true, man. It's true. I already established that. He already told the baby to be a heavy sleeper. Good luck. Yeah. Sleep in some Benadryl maybe. I don't know.

Whatever you need to do. I did that tomorrow this weekend. Nice. A little Benadryl. That's his dog, by the way. That's not a baby. What am I going to do? Mm-hmm.

Weekly recap? Yeah. It's actually gonna week hold on before you guys do that i just want to shout out the po box real quick oh i need to go pick up stuff yeah if i think i think there's one thing i got an email yeah i need to go pick it up so if you guys are interested in sending next week we have a po box the link will be in the description so you guys can send us anything. We have a PO box. The link will be in the description. So you guys can send us anything you want. We're going to open it live on air. We won't open anything you want,

but you can send anything you want. I'll open anything they want to send. All right. That's fine. Bo will. Bo will do it.

I'll open it happily. Yeah, that's fine. But yeah, okay, you guys can go. Weekly recap. What did we do this week? Golfed. Last week, huh?

Golfed and we went out. Next week we're going to have a great weekly recap. Yeah, huh? Golfed and we went out Next week we're gonna have A great weekly recap Yeah Next week Yeah, we are Next week You know what happened this week?

Hmm Guess what Bo got me for my birthday I know what he got you A little early birthday present So I'm not gonna ruin the surprise Well, he got it Let him know Bo got me an AK-47

Yes Yeah Pop that one Do you have it with you? Pop that one AK-47 No, this dumbass doesn't have a fucking ID So he couldn't get a background check I lost my ID Yeah. Yeah. You have that one. Do you have it with you? Top that one. AK-47. No, this dumbass doesn't have a fucking ID, so he couldn't get a background check. I lost my ID when I was buying cigarettes.

Stupid. I literally, I'm like, should I tell him to bring an ID? I'm like, there's no way he doesn't have a driver's license on him. There's no way he's about to be 25 and doesn't have a fucking ID. Well, you know what happened was I was walking up. I had my wallet in my pocket, and I opened it up. I'm like, where the fuck's my ID at? All my cards are there, but where's the ID?

Somebody stole your ID. No, I bought a pack, and I think I didn't put it in my wallet right. I think I just put it in and closed it. It fell somewhere. And it's just somewhere. Well, that's tough. That's all right. He'll get it.

He'll get it. I'll get it. And we'll go shooting. Yeah, we can go in my backyard if you want. Yeah. Get a lot of space back there. There's cats that always hang on the wall, too. You just...

Perfect. Yeah. I mean, AK-47 for my birthday. Yeah. It was hard to find, too. I was a little worried. I was like, I need to come through. This AK-47 is banned from being sold to the United States anymore.

Right. They literally just banned it. They just banned it. Yeah. It was the only place that sold it. It was like some fucking suite. It was... You would never guess. So Bo didn't tell me anything. It was the only place that sold it. It was like some fucking suite. It was, you would never guess.

So this, so Bo didn't tell me anything. He's like, come to this spot. We have an appointment, 1230. It looks like a lawyer's office. Okay.

So I'm walking, like we're like, I'm like, I thought Bo was going to get me jerked off for my birthday. Right. That's what I thought was going to happen. That's good.

That's what I thought. I'm like, Bo, you know, should I take anything for this? Thank you. This would be really cool. Like we'd be next to each other and do this. What's going on thought. I'm like, Bo, you know, should I take anything for this? Thank you. This would be really cool. Like, we could be next to each other and do this.

What's going on? And then we're sitting in the lobby, and it looks like a lawyer's office. Like, who's the- You walk up. You're like, hey, I have an appointment at 1230. You're like, all right, I'll call. Who's the big guy in here, in town? Knockvee.

Knockvee. It looks like a Knockvee office. And I'm just like, Bo, do I get to pick any lawyer I want today? Is that what's going on? I swear to God it's a lawyer's office. You get to commit a crime for your birthday. I went there. I have to be in the wrong place, but I'm going to go in and see.

It looked nice. We walk in. It's down a bunch of hallways. It looks all like lawyer's offices. Then you just open this door. Four AKs just laid out. Take your pick. Literally, take your pick damn i went and i'm

like i don't know which one i i picked out one immediately it was all black one which he ended up picking it's the one i would buy him but i don't know because i don't know if he wanted like the traditional look it's a gamble so i'm like you know what i'm gonna bring him in have him all laid out and let him decide any ak's a good ak but man did he pick the right one yeah it was it looks nice you know like Ford trucks

Ford trucks Ford trucks okay it's the Raptor of guns Ford trucks okay looks good

that's what it is would you agree yeah yeah I'm excited for next camping trip we're gonna go we're gonna kill a fucking cow hell yeah alright fair enough it's a good toy what are you gonna it's a really good toy for the next camping trip. We're going to kill a fucking cow.

Hell yeah. All right. Fair enough. It's a good toy. It's a really good toy. It's incredible, Bob. Does it go full auto? I asked her that. She said,

that's illegal. But it's possible. I was like, how would I make it full auto if I was going to? And she's like, that's illegal. I'm going to call ADF.

I don't even have my license. Who are you going to tell? Yeah. I'm not buying it. You don't know who I am. That's funny. So yeah, big week.

Yeah. Big week. Big week coming for sure. Big week coming. We've got your birthday next, or this weekend. This Saturday. Coming up.

We're going to post pictures. Oh yeah. We'll show you guys what the theme was this year. They'll see it after the birthday yeah so we'll have them okay I like that these are my people and this is

my life this is what we pray for and this is God's plan if you ain't from This is what we pray for. This is God's plan. This is God's plan. If you ain't from here. I hope they're excited.

Yeah. I'm excited. We do a theme every year. Come downtown this weekend. Come see us. We'll be Art District. Art District. Walking around.

Do we say the city? Should we tell them the city we're in? It won't matter because we're going to have gone up. Las Vegas, Nevada. Yeah, we're in Las Vegas. Somebody commented on our last video, like, you guys are in Vegas? Yeah. Yeah, we're in Las Vegas. It won't matter because we're going to have a go at it. Yeah, we're in Las Vegas. Somebody commented on our last video, like, you guys are in Vegas? Yeah. Yeah, we're in Las Vegas.

Yeah, we're here. Las Vegas, Nevada. Come find us. We're going to be playing pool, singing karaoke. That's us. Drunk in town. All right. Smoking cigs.

Gambling. So we'll go ahead and jump in. It's been in the news a lot lately. I don't know if you guys know too much about it, but the Jonah Hill controversy. I wanted to get some input from you guys. So have you guys seen the text messages? Do you guys know about this or not really? No idea.

Something about her like on her phone all the time texting somebody? Nah. Not at all. Not it? Nah. You didn't. Not it. Nah. You didn't see it. Wrong Jonah Hill? Different Jonah Hill.

Who do you think Jonah Hill is? I know who Jonah Hill is. It had to do with a girl, but it was... Here, let me just read. Maybe that was her text to him? Let me read this text message. All right.

Here we go. Hold on. Let me say this. So Jonah Hill's ex-girlfriend, it was like a year after they broke up, she posted what she claimed were toxic text messages. Now women go through their healing phase. I can't believe I was with a man.

A year after they broke up. Time to shit on them now. All right, let's see. I'm healed. I went to my therapist. Let's see what they said. She reaffirmed all the thoughts that I had. This is what he says.

Plain and simple. If you need surfing with men, boundaryless, inappropriate friendships with men, to model, to post pictures of yourself in a bathing suit, to post sexual pictures, friendships with women who are in unstable places from your wild recent past, beyond getting lunch or coffee or something respectful, I am not the right partner for you. If these things bring you to a place of happiness, I support it and there will be no hard feelings.

These are my boundaries for a romantic relationship. My boundaries with you based on the way these actions have hurt our trust. So people are saying that this is toxic and that he's trying to control her life. I think that's incredible. I think those people are stupid as shit. Crazy. She was a surfer who was like already doing this before. So she was already doing that.

Oh yeah. Give me some context here. So she was that woman before they started dating, I'm assuming, right? Yes. She was that, like she was surfer posted on Instagram. She's got one arm, right? Yeah. She's still surfer.

No. So this is, posted on Instagram. She's got one arm, right? She's still surfer? So this is my thoughts on it. You're Jonah Hill. You're Jonah Hill. Right? Which, you know. You're not hot. But you're funny.

You're funny. I think being Jonah Hill. I remember when Jonah Hill was going through a me phase. I put it on Twitter back in fucking. Yeah, he got a little jacked, didn't he? No, it was just like... He lost weight. He got into like cool shit. I remember when Jonah Hill was going into like...

Tattoos. Tattoos and all that shit. We got the same tattoo. He got it after me. You know what I mean? The bandito one? Yeah, he was going through a me phase. I do remember seeing that.

But like, long story short, basically, you can't date somebody. One, that's not bad at all but what he's asking for is most likely what i'm imagining a girl to change her yeah life right now that she is it kind of makes sense right you you have a a different lifestyle for a different life now you're with somebody your lifestyle should change at least a little i don't think so it's so hard because i obviously i went through the same thing where it's like what attracts you to them originally her being hot her being doing these things like okay

i like this and then as you develop more and more feelings then you're like wait everybody else likes this i don't you like this you get more possessive yeah you get more possessive you like want to mark your ground like yeah don't don't go serving with a guy even though she's been serving with a guy who she's not fucking for 10 years right she's been doing that the whole time that was just one one of the things in the list i know but my whole point is just like she's been doing like you fell in love with a person who's doing those things already right and now you don't want them to do all the things that they've been doing right so it's like it's not going to work or you're going want them to do all the things that they've been doing right so it's like it's not going to work or you're going to deal with it i see how that part's like doesn't

make sense however i think he went about it in the best way i think so 100 too he's like hey if this doesn't work for you it doesn't work for me either right that's okay and i'm cool that's fine i don't think he did it's the lowest amount of toxicity i've ever heard in my life at all i think there was like other texts like following that that made him look worse. Just out of context, maybe? He just came at her. Just his response to what she said, maybe? In everything she posted, she deleted all her messages.

Right. So you can only see what he's saying. That's so fucking lame. Yeah. That's so lame. So you have no clue what she's saying. You automatically side with him, even if he beat the shit out of her. No, I completely understand it.

I've been in that position. The fact that you're posting though like a a relationship why are you posting that is so whack to me what do you think she gets out of it you know attention but like affirmation i was right i just i think it's whack guess who's telling her she's right all the women are telling her she's right not in the man who want to have sex with her maybe i i actually have seen jonah hill's girlfriend she's right. Not men. Not a man who want to have sex with her, maybe. A lame fucking guy. I actually have seen Jonah Hill's girlfriend. She's not that hot. She's not. Jonah's not a shallow dude, I don't think. No, he's more into a cool girl than he is into a hot girl.

Right. And I respect that. He's a booba guy. Yeah. I respect it. I go both ways because, like I said, I've been through that. So I'm like, I understand wanting her to change, but I also understand like, hey, she was this person already.

It's really hard. It's like a slow process getting her to change but i also understand like hey she was this person already it's really hard it's like a slow process getting her to change like you like fucking slowly chip away but like imagine you now doing everything you do and someone's like yeah but like i don't want you to do those things yeah like well yeah that's what i do that's who i am exactly what are you gonna say like dude she's toxic as shit no no. No. Right. Rebecca, I'm not going to change if that's not okay with you. Just like he said. Right. She's valid for, you know, leaving, whatever.

Yeah. That's weird. Cool. Yeah. But everything that happened after is the fucking problem. Bingo. 100%. Crybaby bitch.

That's all it is. What's next, Carter? So. She should get sick, maybe. I heard somebody say that even if it's your first time hooking up with a girl, that saying I love you in missionary is a must. First time hooking up with a girl?

I think we think it. I thought it. Not first. Do I love her? I've totally thought it. Am I in love? Totally thought it. You're locking eyes? Yeah. You're like, wow, what is this? Am I in love totally thought it you're locking eyes

yeah you're like wow what is this am I in love especially especially if it's so good yeah I get it Logan's going to a dark place

oh my god as soon as anything sex comes up Logan's like a shark dude that that little cover goes over his eye he's just in

fucking sex mode even if it's even if it's ribbed I don't know if I've ever Have ribbed but I don't either I need to have more sex So I can

Yeah you maybe Maybe that's it Too lean Maybe you just need Too lean Her pussy's too lean Yeah It's a crazy description

She's got a carb up Crazy description Bulk up Well I'm sure you told Some women that you love them when you don't mean it right or no no you wouldn't you wouldn't do that at least once you wouldn't do that i'm trying to think if i have i only told one girl i loved her so um no i've never told someone that i love them while having sex that's a lie no no while like if i

wasn't like i do love you in some kind of way but have you thought about it though that's a lie. No, no, no. While if I wasn't like, I do love you in some kind of way. But have you thought about it, though? Well, that's a cop-out, dude. Love you in some kind of way. As you guys would tell me, I love you right now. I love you right now. Am I lying? Yes. Nope.

Yes. I'm not lying. Love you in some type of way. There's some kind of love going on. Like Brandon said. What did he say? I don't know. I don't know i don't know like there's a lot of dumb shit brandon said yeah i don't remember what he said he doesn't love her he loves her

you guys do that yeah this is how i show my emotion this is how i show my love i don't make love i grew up in a toxic household this time. Show my love. Sex. Sex. Rough sex. No. I don't. Did he say rough? Yeah, he said rough. Yeah. I've had it told to me.

I don't know if I've ever said it. Now, does that make it harder for you? Do you feel like you need to say it? It's habit. No? What's your response

when she's like, I love you? And you're just eye contact looking directly at her in missionary. I just pretend to sneeze. Hold on, hold on.

I do. Sorry, baby, sorry, sorry. No, I think I've had someone tell me they love me, but I didn't say it back yet. That's crazy to me. I would just say it. I've done that before. They said they love me, and I just was like, like that. Like a head nod.

While you're inside her? No, no, no, just in general. Okay, okay, okay. While you're inside them, though, then it's like, oh, well, I love you too. Yeah, 100%. Right now, I love you more than anything I think I've ever loved in my life. My response to that was, that's okay. That's good.

While having sex? Mm-hmm. That's okay. It's like, Andrew, I love you. It's like, that's okay. You can love me. That's good While having sex That's okay I was like Andrew I love you I was like That's okay You can love me That's okay

Yeah You can love me I'll let you That's tough Never said it back though If I didn't Really Yeah

How many times have you said it While having sex Oh I like to say it When I'm having sex Yeah it's way easier than It's actually really hot When you're I know

When you say it While you're having sex Like just the That's how you. It's actually really hot when you're like, I know. Yeah. When you say it while you're having sex, like just the, the. That's how you line your, your comes up. That's exactly how you line your comes up.

Yeah. That's how you do it. It's true. And love sex is better than any sex. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. I'll put it.

I understand, man. I don't know about that. Well, you've been in love for too long. Yeah, I know're that's what's happening grass is always green on the other side you think so the other way yeah maybe maybe that's the tree so neil was dating a girl for or seeing someone for five years and they've been dating for six months i you guys talk about that and i can relate to that yeah that's how he

thinks all men are like men take longer to actually say they're in a relationship than women but when 100 when the thing that's what i think though is when men are in a relationship though they're in it they're actually they're in it and it's that's the the hard because that's that's what he argued is like women nate by like by nature they want to be with one man men want to be with multiple women so when they get in a relationship they're they're like sacrificing their inherent nature for them because they're like you know what i want to be with multiple women but it's not good for her so i'm not going to do that so i won't do it i sacrifice my i'm sacrificing yeah for her i want they don't they take that for granted man i wish we could have our fourth guest right now to hear what they say about i i would like a woman's perspective on that too because that's the thing what do they think about like yeah because the thing is i know girls they get way

more attention than we do well yeah like no questions even the most handsome of us like like myself the most average woman the hottest the hottest of men you're the most handsome guy i know and still don't get as much attention as just an average girl just a girl walking down the street yeah and it's like they don't the thing is though i've talked to them they get a lot of attention but it's not from the people they really don't want the attention from yeah that's like the big thing yeah we want it from anybody it always feels good i was telling them about that so it's like we were out this weekend we got some some some gay gentlemen saying oh my god are you guys models which is crazy by the way it's never happened so good though it happens to me all the time never happens all the time you don't go out enough

it happens though i'm being facetious here logan no just to me though that's a good word all the time right but like we still liked it yeah they're like no i'm not a model but thank you could i be you think i could be a model i was out in seattle too and it's just any attention's nice because we don't get it we just don't i wonder if we got it as much if we would react the same as like the average woman of just like oh just another you know fuck boy if we're talking about patricia no he talked about like how normal women get treated like celebrities it's like being a celebrity you're just walking down the street getting catcalled. It's like, oh my God, I have to leave the house today

and get harassed by men. Like, oh my God, I have to get all done up and look this way. I always tell them, like, I would kill for that. Yeah. Oh my God, I'm going to go to the store and I'm going to be bothered by men. Because the thing is, I like to wear

different kind of outfits. Yeah. And I like to dress a different kind of way. People will notice it. And it's just, I'm always like, yeah, thanks. How good does it feel for somebody like, you look so good today. Oh my God, I love your shirt.

Yeah, you're like, oh my God. Thank you. Start walking differently. Yeah. I guess he likes my shirt. It's always a he. Literally, it's what it is. Always.

Always. But I still like it. Yeah. I still appreciate it. Well, that's like the thing. It's like women, so women and men obviously love differently but women love a certain way and they want us to love them the

same way that they love us but they don't understand that's not how it works right you know what i mean but a lot of men nowadays will try to love like a woman to like make her happy yeah i think so too yeah or for the clout of it i'd like they want the clout of being like a different guy because i've been there it's not different anymore though but now now it's just it's not real that's all it is yeah i get it i know it's a whole thing i'll go to therapy for you the whole thing that's all it is i still would like to go to therapy to know if i'm crazy or not no i don't think i think as i've gotten older i realize i'm not that crazy i think most men think this certain way we're just we're just portrayed

in a certain way where like we feel like we have to be a certain type of person for women but no i'm not talking about women right now i'm just talking about me in general you're not that up dude i feel like you're a normal man that's how we think We're animals Logan's fucked up dude Logan is fucked up You've seen him eat What if What if I'm like A crazy person though You're not

The shit that goes on in my head Is like nuts I think you Would be the first person To suggest to eat Somebody else In a group setting Of like survival

I think I would be Because he's a realist It would be like The first night Logan's like Okay Somebody has to be eaten It's be like the first night and Logan's like, okay, somebody has to be eaten. It's not going to be me.

Yes, I do. I really think that's you. I feel like I'm a very selfless person where I'd be like, we can hold out. Are we being honest right now? Are we being honest with ourselves? You're going to give the thigh to somebody else, but you're going to make sure you eat. Yeah, you're still going to eat. Andrew's projecting so hard right now.

Do you think that's how it is too? I don't feel like... I think Andrew is. That's 100% how I think it's going to go too. I don't think so. If us three were going to... I'd be the last one to suggest that. Starve to death.

I think you would be the first. I don't think so. I 100% think so. I don't think so. I think we would just kill people to get them out of here. I would say also though, if it was us with like a plane crash, then we're fine. We're killing everybody so. I think we would just kill people to get them out of here. I would say also though if it was us

with like a plane crash then we're fine. We decide okay you know what we've decided to start eating people. Us three of the group. Did you see that like

Theo Vaughn where he talked about like who would he eat and he's like oh the Vietnamese guys. They're just forgiving. Think about what is

not World War II that was fucking Vietnam War. He's like we can go there right now. They're cool about it. not World War II. That was fucking Vietnam War. He's like, we can go there right now. They're cool about it. They're totally fine. I hated that he said that and then was able to just like back it up right away. Yeah. It kind of makes sense.

It seems like he's making shit up on the fly. Like just like, yeah, you know, and pull some shit out of the sky. But it made perfect sense. It made complete sense. Like, wait, yeah, it kind of works sky. But it made perfect sense. It made complete sense. It kind of works out. It's crazy. Oh my goodness. I kind of like him.

He's got some good ones. So we agree you do not have to say I love you in missionary. No, you don't have to. Andrew can get away with saying whatever he wants for some reason. I don't know how he does it. You don't have to say it, but you want to say it. Anybody can get away with it. You just have to do it. It's okay if you he does it you don't have to say it but you want to say anybody can get away with it you just have to do it i was i yeah no i think it's the first time i had i wanted to i was like why am i first time you had what

you had sec the first time yeah can we say that on here we're gonna get we're allowed to say the first time i no not the first time but like with a new person the first time you did it with them a new person i was like i like why do i why is that coming to my head i don't want to hang out with you tomorrow my wiener just got hard what the fuck is going on i can't wait till my mom meets you that's definitely both all right andrew you had a couple questions i want to know um so i've got two they kind of play off each other. Your guys' biggest insecurities, if you have any. Biggest insecurities.

I was always super insecure about this bone I had on my chest for the longest time. Like, growing up, I hated taking off my shirt. I don't know if you can understand that because you have the same thing. Well, I've always been, like, this skinny kid, so, like, it never really bothered me. Like, I would always rather be skinny than fat it was just always when you're young you want to be like everybody else so i take off my shirt and be like what the fuck is that yeah what do you mean what what is what is it i thought it's normal so like for me for a while that's why i got started working out was because your chest yeah i was like oh i need to fucking build my chest up i grew up with you know callaway i grew up with, you know, call it what you will.

I grew up with some clout going through school. So I never really got made fun of. Which I don't understand because you looked terrible in school. I was like, peaked in like seventh grade. I never got made fun of. I don't know if it's because I was so hot or if it's just I would bully you into the ground with words afterwards. But either way, I never got made fun of. So I never really had like crazy physical insecurities or anything like that. So do you have mental insecurities?

Not really. Okay, well, do you have any insecurities? Because this is your question. No. You definitely have something that you're... I really don't think so. At some point in your life, you weren't 14 with an insecurity. There's no way. I mean, maybe a small wiener. But, I mean, you guys know every couple birthdays I get a little bit more. Yeah. Just put that order in. For the longest time.

Well, because I went so long without having sex that all I was doing was watching porn with guys with huge fucking dicks. The biggest dicks. I can't do this. I'll never be this guy. I'll never be this guy. Why would a woman want to have sex with me when that's out there? Because as a man, you think, like, all women want big dicks, which now I get older, I'm like, well, they don't want that. That's not what they want. They don't even when that's out there because as a man you think like all women want big dicks which now i get older i'm like oh they don't want that that's not what they want they

don't even want that no right but i for the longest time i was like my dick's not big enough for this i had a girlfriend in middle school who was more developed you know than most and i don't know don't don't remember somewhere in there sixth grade yeah sixth grade seventh grade you know there's just we're talking you know, maybe some sex is in play. And I remember going back to bed in the morning in the summer because everybody said you grow in your sleep. I was like, dude, my penis is not big enough for what's to come in the next couple weeks. I need to get my sleep.

I got to hit puberty now. So I tried to sleep as much as I could, dude, and it didn't work. I did that for height. I didn't do it for dick size. No, I did it for wiener. Oh, I didn't even know that this was a play.

Yeah. I would have slept way more. Oh, I would sleep from like sophomore year to senior year of high school. I just, I was like, I'm sleeping. I'm not getting out of bed.

I didn't sleep enough. Yeah, I was like, I'm getting out of bed. I'm not getting out of bed. I mean, it didn't work. I didn't even get like wiener until like 15,

16. I feel like I was late to the, to the party. And then every year after that, yeah, you just yeah not every year it was like 19 and then 22 what about 25 well 26 is a i put a big order in 26 i got a half inch coming for sure what's the website i can go on for that you just you just got to look it up man i can't give away you know all right but it's great like literally you just looked on your birthday you're like whoa whose penis is that wait i bet you're 25 it did you put an order in it's too late now i've been manifesting it might be real um well you have to talk about your insecurity so growing up i remember this

kid told me that i was fat in sixth grade. And I was. I remember you telling me about this. So what happened was I. It hurt him. I forged. Logan starved himself. So hear me out. No, no, no.

This is what happened. This is what happened. So in sixth grade. Bully is good. I got caught up in this like. Look at you now. You look fucking great. This whole thing where I was just trying to hang out with everybody and like fit in whatever.

And I wasn't. Dickie shorts, DC shoes. I wasn't, I wasn't doing my homework anymore. So I was got a D in math or D. Yeah. I could D in math.

And then I forged a signature in pencil. Like a bad report card. Yeah. And cause I was like, you got to show your parents you're not doing well and so i forged a signature and pencil and i raced it and did again raced it did it again raced it again i just i didn't think oh the teacher's gonna tell that this is fucked up i was practicing before i did it in pen isn't it crazy that you were that stupid at one point yeah it's so hard to believe and so then

the teacher's like obviously you forged this so now i need a real signature you're like what does forged mean so then yeah so then i as my dad's dropped me off at school that morning i'm like hey i'm doing a little bit behind in math right now but i need you to sign this you know i try to sign this out for you because I forgot or whatever. And then my parents grounded me for three months. Three full months. That's a heavy punch. That's a fucking.

For a D in math. That's a life sentence. Yeah. That's kind of a piece of shit for Tony. It was definitely mom's fault. I couldn't leave my house for three months. That's crazy. So all I did was eat and just hang out for three months.

And so then what happened, and they enrolled me in Kumon. Was that like a tutoring thing? Yeah. It fucking sucked dick. What a loser, dude. So then what happened was I show up to baseball practice after three months.

Just stacked. He went from number one hitter to number four. No, but now I'm fucking fat. And my coach is like, what the fuck happened to you? He tells me, you look fucking out of shape as fuck. Logan, you got to retry out. In sixth grade. And I don't have friends in sixth grade.

It's not that cool. Is this why you came to Stealth? I don't remember. But basically, long story short your parents made you fat this kid at we're playing football we get into a scuffle and then he's like that's why you're fucking fat and i was like ate you and i was like like i was like i just like looked down and i was friends with like the most hood black kid at our middle school. He's like, you don't fucking say that shit to the, to Demetrius Turner.

Leave that name out. But like, this is the whitest black kid in town. Yeah. And he like, this kid's not the whitest black kid in town. This is like the realest black kid at our school. And he basically just stood up for me,

but I'm like, like, I already heard it. You're like, thanks. You're tucking your stomach back into your pants. And I didn't feel good about it at all. That kid got expelled later on, so I didn't have him to stick up for me anymore.

And then I remember asking my dad one day. He was cleaning the pool with his shirt off. My dad's jacked. Yeah, always been. And I'm just like, Dad, why don't I look like any of us? Like all my, everyone in my family is like in a good shape. I was like, why do I not look like you guys? Am I adopted, dad?

That, I would hate to see 12 year old you ask that question, dude. It hurts so bad. Did that stick? Like, do you, like, do you think if you ever got chubby again, like, it would just eat you alive? No, because that's why I got tattoos, too. He would never get chubby again. Because I think one day, if I do, like, 50, 60, and I'm, like, out of shape. You look so much better.

You look better with tattoos than without tattoos. I was like, oh, no, don't cover up your abs. Like, you've got abs. I'm like, I don't care, though. Right. Like, one day, if I don't have them, I'd way rather be covered in fucking tattoos. It's not just a fucking bubble of skin. Exactly.

It's just a bigger canvas. Exactly. That's all. I feel that. That was mine, though. That's good. That was a good story. You like that story?

I appreciate you kind of getting vulnerable there. What about, like, the insult that hurts you guys the most? So that might be the same for you, Logan. But I've got one for this. I feel like being around you guys and like especially being your friend, I've gotten so numb to just insults in general. I'm like nothing bothers me at this point. Which I have to censor myself with other friend groups because I'm like, wait. Right.

I can't say the same shit that I would say to you with other friends because that might hurt their feelings. Yeah. Because I'm so used to like the shit talk that we do. Right. Where it's, it's borderline, borderline really bad. Suicidal.

Yeah. It's definitely there. Where I'm like, wait, I can't, I can't say that to that. They don't understand that it's a joke. Yeah.

Okay. But go ahead with your mind. And then obviously the same thing for me, it doesn't like apply anymore, but always coming up. If somebody would tell me that I wasn't funny it would just eat me alive so i know i knew i was the funniest person and if somebody for some reason just decided to lie that day i'd be like dude fuck i'm so funny there's no way that's true i would hate when people would say that the same way when

i talk shit to you about like your athletic. I think that affects you the same way. That gets you. No, I'm an athlete. Well, you just flip a switch, then you tee me up to the max. That's not true. That gets true. I went crazy last night. Yeah.

Absolutely crazy. Last night? Kai had you slipping. I didn't slip. He just had me beating a cross. Kai's a real hooper, bro. Lining any of you up, it's the same fucking thing as having him. I guarded him the first game.

He scored like one or two points. He never scored on me. All I know is... He crossed me a bad, but he never scored on me. Brandon didn't score a single bucket on me. Brandon was hooping a little bit. You guarded Brandon, and he put seven in a row when we restarted the game. That's because the person comes in screens,

and then whoever's guarding the other person doesn't pick up on the screen. They don't call it. And I'm looking at Logan right now because he wouldn't call the screen. That's Carter and Dee for me. And then he let the guy blow by. That's Carter and Dee the screen. They don't call it. I'm looking at Logan right now because he wouldn't call the screen. That's Carter and Dee for me. Let the guy blow by. That's Carter and Dee for me. They don't switch. They don't call.

They just let him blow by. Guys, I haven't played basketball in a month. I get it. I'm sorry. I told Shorty last night, I was like, I did not play good basketball tonight. You got to lie to her. No, I could lie, but it's just I don't even care. Listen, baby, I played the game of my life.

No. I was like, hey, I didn't do care. Listen, baby, I played a game of my life. No. I was like, hey, I didn't do good tonight. I did good defense. Logan didn't make one three, but that's okay. No, I didn't make one three. I didn't make one three. Usually you're good for a good amount. Like three or four threes.

But like you're, the consistency of it, like you take maybe eight and you're hitting like four or five. Yeah. Because when you're throwing them up, you're like, wait. I always pass. I do my best to pass first. It's so much more fun passing to me. I love to pass first.

Well, before you took your break, you were... I got locked in. You were hooping a little bit. Yeah, I got dialed in. You were driving, doing some moves. I was like, wait a second. It's all right. I'll be back.

I love when Carter's on you. You did hit a fadeaway on Drew, though. I did hit a nasty fade. That was kind of nasty. I did the double fake turn fade. Yeah. I remember this at all. You were kind of getting embarrassed a little bit last night.

I did also hit a three in his face to win the game. That wasn't in my face. It was a closeout. I picked you up. It was in his mouth. Yeah, dude. Never guarded Bo last night once. This is all bullshit.

That's exactly how it went. Look, you see it? His insecurity is coming out right now. It's coming out right now. I'm being lied on right now. Okay, this is what my insecurity is. Being slandered. What's your insecurity?

No, no, no. Not being funny. That was last one. This was like the insult that hits you the most. So it's not an insult, but when people say I'm sorry, that drives me fucking crazy. We touched on that last week. Did we tell that? That was a Marty thing.

When people say I'm sorry, that makes like just jump out of my fucking yeah because we're like well what the fuck are you sorry when it's like there's nothing to be you weren't even involved yeah that makes me crazy um what what makes me like kind of like check a box on somebody is like this one guy i was at a pool party and he was like i was like yeah dude i just have to like make decisions all day and he's like oh like what do you have to do your life's so hard oh what do you have to do i'm like oh dude you got no idea what i do do you get drunk all day for fun like you yeah but i was like oh like you don't just because i don't pretend i don't like portray right who i am or like what i do outside of your fun life exactly i don't like that's not my personality

i was like oh okay fair enough very nice i see you oh man we're not in the same thing though no we're not playing the same i thought yours was going to be um people saying like you're inbred no i don't care about that we got we got heated that day in ohio now i was telling bo about that when we lived together i didn't see you for two months afterwards, but I couldn't look at you. And I understood exactly where he was coming from on Monday. Because I didn't want to fucking look at you on Monday. I find those buttons, Carter, and it's just... Andrew and I lived together for three to four months.

I'm good at what I do. Three to four months. And we would just go back and forth. Literally, Trey would be sitting there, and Andrew and I would be roasting each other, trying to peel each other's fucking fingernails off for two hours straight. Just two hours nonstop.

And it's exhausting with him because he's good. And he just never stops. Yeah, you're like, fuck, dude. I was Googling stats on what race had the most inbred, and Filipino was up there. So I was using it for Logan because he always claims how Filipino he is no it was because he's blue eyes I was telling him he's inbred Start looking up steps

But like either way I live in four months and then afterwards I couldn't see him for two full months because I was like night if I see you right now, it's gonna affect our friendship.. So I can't look at you. We've got to like... I can't look at you. It was just like four months of just picking each other apart, like piece by piece. Every chance we could get. There's nothing else to do out there. There was no money.

We weren't making any money. You wouldn't fish with me, so I'd come home from fishing. I just want to fucking make fun of somebody. So that's what would happen. Made it work, though. Made it work. Trey can't give it back, so it'd just be like beating a dead horse. Yeah.

You don't do that, Trey. You'd say one thing to Trey, and you're like, oh. It's beating up a cripple kid. Why are you going to do that? He'd just look at you. Trey would do like a half smile. He'd be like a little disappointed. Well, this is the thing, though, is me and Trey grill the fuck out of each other.

Really? He loves it. He loves grilling, but the thing is... He loved watching us. Yeah, he doesn't want to get grilled by Andrew. That's a lot of people. Because he sees how deep he cuts. So he's like, I don't want to get cut that deep.

Yeah, it's superficial cutting. You know what I mean? I'm a winner, dude. So Trey would side with one person at a time because he didn't want to be the one getting double teams but like when it's just me and trey we just talk like he was telling me i couldn't eat two steaks today i was like trey i could eat two he's like no your little tummy couldn't handle it you need all the tumsums. You cry. I'm like, Trey, I could eat two steaks.

No, you couldn't handle it. Yeah. So it's just, Trey loves it, but he does not want to get caught in the crossfire. Yeah. Trey,

Trey's always quiet when those things come out. Yeah. No, he's dangerous to play with. And I know now I'm like, I don't, I don't really try many times. I'm like,

I, I can't compete on the verbal level that he has. He's so quick. Same thing with your brother. Your brother is so quick to come back. Matt just says some horrible shit. I think Matt's worse than me, dude. He might be a little worse than you.

At least for certain people. It definitely runs in the family. You get it from your mom, for sure. Is that where it comes from? Yeah, it comes from his mom. My mom's more like no filter, but my dad's smarter with shit. My dad's got that multi-level humor, and my mom would just say what comes into her head so you got a little so i got best of both yeah you got a little bit i think it's dangerous i think

a little bit and then it just comes out it's dangerous like oh my god this is funny here it is it's not like think a little bit oh that's gonna hurt him i won't say it it's just like oh my god that's funny that's how i am i think. Yep. Bam. That would hurt my feelings. I'm not going to say that. Andrew doesn't have that. Andrew does not. I don't get hurt at all. I get even.

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