Wonderful! - Roze Buddiez: Baby TV

Episode Date: August 2, 2017

We super didn't want to recap The Men Tell All, so instead, we are subjecting you to this: An hour-long discussion about all the mostly awful baby television we've watched this year. Enjoy? MaxFunDrive ends on March 29, 2024! Support our show now by becoming a member at maximumfun.org/join.

Maybe you should go and do some contemplating. Right reasons, right reasons. Me and my girl, we're all the right reasons. Right reasons, right reasons. Me and my girl, we're all for reasons. I'm the bachelorette and I'm rapping to your poolside. Here to find true love. Hi, this is Rachel McElroy.

Hi, this is Griffin McElroy. And this is Rosebuddies. Hop back in the saddle with us. It's a three-person saddle. And so only the first person that listens to And this is Rosebuddies. Hop back in the saddle with us. It's a three-person saddle. And so only the first person that listens to this episode of Rosebuddies is... Congratulations, if you're listening to this, you're the only listener to this episode of Rosebuddies. You're also in the saddle. You're in the saddle.

Welcome to the saddle. It's a new Rosebuddies spinoff series exclusively about Hey Dude, and you're the only listener. Oh my gosh. Oh my gosh, I would do that. I would do that in a heartbeat i was joking about the technology that would be required to ensure that only the first person who listened to this episode would be the only person that listened but i think if we do an all hey dude episode we might be narrow casting just to the one no i don't think so i think it was a phenomenon oh i've talked to many people about hey dude we can scrap listen this is going

to be a weird episode anyway we could fucking slap hey dude on there if you wanted to i'll let you do a hey dude segment if you let me do a salute your short segment how's that sound okay that sounds fair uh so this is a bachelor bachelor podcast a little wild and a little strange make your home out on the range. I could do the whole fucking thing, baby. Are you kidding me? So grab your horse and ride along because you can't hitch a ride if you don't

get down. No, babe. Sing it. Come on, ride my horse. Oh my god, Griffin. Oh, Rachel's looking at me with fury. So this is a Bachelor Bachelor podcast and I know you're thinking, hey, there was Rachel's looking at me with fury. So this is a Bachelor of Bachelorette podcast. I know you're thinking, hey, there was one of those a couple days ago. That was a weird one because all the boys talked for a while to dad.

But we don't want to talk about that one because it's always so bad. It's just, I think Griffin and I have covered these before. And it's just a lot of recapping. It's pretty much entirely a recap. And it's like an easy like episode for them and now with social media like i guess there's always been social media but i just i feel like i know where every contestant stands prior to going into these episodes i guess like any any kind of big things that happen like the biggest thing was there were two whole segments dedicated to lee and uh a lot of the

the guys and chris harrison and rachel when she came on later were very openly critical of lee's shitty tweets um which was good right that was very good and lee did the usual sort of like snaky shit that dudes and i guess women contestants do on the show when they do something wrong where they like say like you know i'm so glad i have friends back at home who accept me for who i am and help me grow i'm sorry if i made you feel that way a lot of i'm sorry ifs and then and then the it tried to do this like moment of redemption form at the end where like i i i i don't know it was it was the whole episode was just very like um it was a lot of like dudes like fucking waboomble like trying to get one more fucking like let me just can i just get right in there real quick like trying to like pick

fights with dean and it's, get the fuck off. What the fuck are we watching? Why are we doing this? Not a lot to say. Not a lot funny about it. No. Except for those bloopers. The bloopers are pretty good.

And you know what? No, you know what? Fuck this. The bloopers weren't good this year. Oh, what about when Dean stuck gum behind his ear that was fun it was fine whatever is it there was i it i it just wasn't very long and there weren't that many i'm sorry i didn't love the bloopers this year gang what about when rachel was eating chips and she said these are salty like josiah is right now after his exit that was good too so this is a podcast about a television

show series where we talk about one television show unless that one television show is not on then we talk about a lot of different television shows hey guys if you listen to us because we talk about the bachelor bachelorette you just stop right now yeah that's it for the episode that's it um we were talking about we wanted what we wanted to do this week, and we realized, like, we have talked about some shows that we love, like Terrace House. By the way, get up on that Boys X Girls in the City feed that is slowly drip feeding out. Thank you, folks at Costco Subs, for your hard, hard work and everything you do.

You're doing the Lord's work. Yeah, check our facebook group if you don't know what we're talking about um it feels illicit to like talk about it um so we talk about these shows that we really really like but we realized in like talking about this episode of rose buddies that there are shows that we spend a vast majority of our television watching time watching that we have never even come close to addressing on this show. And I think this is the episode to do it. Yeah, we're working without a net here, guys, because I don't have notes on these episodes.

We are talking about shows that we've watched with our baby that are designed mostly for babies. And before we get into it, I do want to hop in here and say we're going to be talking about a lot of shows, and I don't want anybody to get the impression that we just fucking plop Henry down in a chair in front of the TV and leave him there, although it will certainly sound like that

by the number of shows that we have consumed. I literally just went back through our Hulu history and looked at what we've watched in the last eight months. It's background noise most of the time the reason i wanted to talk about it is because i did i before i had a a child and frankly for a while after i had a child i didn't realize that there are strata of what like kids programming is and i think it's an interesting thing to talk about because like before we had henry i was like oh it's gonna be sick um i've never gotten too

deep into steven universe or adventure time those are kid shows we'll crack into those and it's like yeah those are those are great and there's a lot of like really really great sort of young young adult or kids like tv that ain't for babies though no what babies like are two things colorful shapes and colorful shapes in motion and those are pretty and music and so there's this weird like ecosystem of kids tv shows that we're gonna we're gonna crack into on this episode a lot of what we're gonna talk about on this episode though like if you go by hulu so hulu conveniently lets you sort. And there's television programming for babies, which is basically what Griffin described, just moving shapes and music.

And then there's ages two to four, which is where we spend a lot of our time. We spend a lot of our time there because, frankly, we used to watch a lot of YouTube, essentially screensavers, that would be like clown music and then a bunch of red and blue and yellow triangles moving around. And like Henry would dig on those. But after a while it was literally torture. Like it was, it was felt like we were hypnotizing our baby.

It felt weird. Yeah. It felt like some Manchurian candidate shit was definitely going down with the ages two to four. He'll usually watch a few minutes and then he'll go back to chewing on something. Um, but we get to benefit with some exceptions, with some exceptions. ages two to four he'll usually watch a few minutes and then he'll go back to chewing on something um but we get to benefit with some exceptions with some exceptions there are some shows that this kid will just fucking lock on to yeah i just have them here in no particular order i thought it

might be fun if we just like burn through them if we hit one that like merits further discussion we go into it but maybe we give like a quick thumbs up thumbs down review okay of these kids television shows and if you don't have a kid and you're listening to this one i hope you find something interesting to listen to some of these shits like storybots like i'll fuck with now like henry's taking a nap and netflix is on pause on storybots and i'm like well i mean let's listen to the next one click let's go some of them are bad though and so let's get let's get cracking i don't know which one to start with well we know that there are some that we have a lot to say about so i don't know if you want to maybe we say yeah let's stagger those a little bit okay um let's start

with doozers because we when we got into doozers i have strong feelings we should have very powerful feelings and maybe this is a good framing device for this conversation, because you're a huge Fraggle Rock fan. Yes, sir. And doozers are doozers from Fraggle Rock. Y'all don't need me to explain what doozers are, right? Okay. Yeah. So doozers, the Fraggle Rock ecosystem says a lot about- A lot of scientific discussion about kids. It says a lot about society as a whole. And so there's the gorgs. This actually might align with trolls now that I think about it.

Oh. But there's the gorgs who are kind of like the humans in the equation. They think that they exist at the center of the universe. And then there's fraggles that like to play. Their big thing is playing and cooperating. Right. And then doozers work. Doozers do they they build

constructions only to have the fraggles knock them down and then they're all too excited to build them again uh it's kind of a fucked up sort of sisyphean existence that the doozers have but so all of that to say when i saw the doozers animated not puppets and a 3d animation sort of veggie tales stuff i was i was concerned because the doozers only exist within the ecosystem they don't they don't function independently they and i just i man it was hard it was hard for me it'd be like doing a show about one half of photosynthesis. Yeah, sure. It's like, well, but you need the whole thing for this to work.

I can't believe that was your example, is one half of photosynthesis. It's like doing a show about The Simpsons, but The Simpsons aren't in it. And it's like, don't you want to know about the Flanders? I guess that's kind of what the Cleveland show did. The Cleveland show, yeah, exactly. Yeah, I don't have any particularly strong feelings about Doozers. I've never gotten too deep into them. But what i wanted to talk about is you're a big fraggle rock fan what were because i honestly wanted to talk about this during this episode

and i had a hard time thinking about like when i was young i don't remember like the shit i was into tv wise because and i think i think a lot of that like like, I know I was deep, deep into, like, the whole, if it was on Nickelodeon, like, yes, I was on it. Like, like Ren and Stimpy. But that wasn't when you were real little. That's it, right. So, like, those are the shows I remember, like, Batman, the animated series, and Pokemon I watched probably every fucking episode of. But when I was a baby i i can't remember too much except for like i watched some sesame street i remember the simpsons i remember

watching the simpsons when i just and and i remember allegro's window allegro's window is the one that like really sticks out to me but i get that confused with eureka's castle maybe that is i'm thinking of both i watched both okay yes eureka's Castle and Allegro's Window. I think the reason for that is because I had two older brothers. And so like. And Jefferson's porticullis. I think it's because I had two older brothers. And so they were just fucking watching, you know, Ren and Stimpy. And I was a baby.

And I was like, okay, I guess this is cool. I feel like, honestly, a lot of the reason that you and I are able to relate on a lot of programming. Is because. Is because you had older brothers. Yeah, I was a big Fraggle Rock fan. My parents didn't have cable, but my grandparents did. And they used to make us VHS tapes and mail them to us of shows like Fraggle Rock so I could watch them. It was pretty great.

You know who I fucked around with? David the Gnome. Oh, God, that show was so boring. Oh, it sucked so bad, but I was there for him. It was so boring. In all things, David the Gnome. I gave that show so many chances. I feel like every time it came on, the theme song was kind of fun. Yeah.

So I used to sit down and be like, I'm going to watch it this time. Yeah. Oh, dull. And what's up with the, as long as we're talking about dudes living in trees, what's up, gummy bears? Gummy bears, I'm here for you, dull. As long as we're talking about dudes living in trees. What's up, gummy bears? Gummy bears, I'm here for you too. That was another good theme song. Best theme song basically ever.

Dashing and daring, courageous and caring. That was even a verse. I could do the chorus, but anybody could do the chorus. Anybody could, yeah. Anyway, let's get back into talking about the shows that we watch. Well, okay, I tried to make Henry watch Pokemon. He's just not there yet. He's just not ready for it.

He's not ready for some of these concepts. Because I watch it and I say, I see here comes the Squirtle Squad. And I'm like, he's going to catch himself one of those Squirtles. And then my mind starts racing with like, now he's going to have a water type Pokemon. That's going to help him beat rock type Pokemon. It's going to help him take down Brock's gym. But Henry's just not there yet. And that's challenging for me. Like, I'm struggling to get through that, obviously.

I'm crying as hard as I possibly can right now. It's not coming through the podcast. But I'm crying really hard. Let's talk about Grandpa Joe's magical playground. Oh magical playground oh my gosh okay so the griffin is very critical of me yeah for good for good fucking reason because we're talking now we are talking about a show called grandpa joe's magical playground to our huge audience and that's because of you okay so i recognize that the tv is basically background you know that i can engage henry in a number of activities and occasionally he'll look up and I'll look up and we'll enjoy a moment together.

And I just saw this as another program with bright colors. And so I just put it on and Griffin walked in and he said, what are you doing? And I was furious. I was furious. Do you have any information on this? Because I honestly, I don't know that I can describe it. I'm gonna see if there's a Wikipedia article, but I honestly think that it doesn't deserve one.

It's kind of a scary looking old man. It falls into this, like, I wanted to get into this earlier, but it falls into this, like, this genre of just, like, bad VeggieTales, sort of. I don't know if you ever got, watched any VeggieTales ever. bad VeggieTales sort of. I don't know if you ever watched any VeggieTales ever. It was a 3D animation, like... I'm familiar with it. Reboot-style 3D animation, but with a biblical flavor.

Wasn't for me as a child. It's... Okay, there's just nothing. Oh, here's an IMDb page. Let's read this description. Grandpa Joe uses his magical building blocks to create wonderful and surprising animals and toys with the help of joy,

Dylan and his loyal dog pepper. Um, it's, it's, everyone's made out of toy blocks and that's upsetting. And they're grandpa Joe himself is kind of a grandpa. Joe is kind of a ghoul because grandpa Joe is not made of toy blocks. And so the image that is immediately implanted in my mind is that grandpa joe has is he the last human on earth i go to that place a lot with these kids shows because

there's not a lot of characters and so my mind immediately races to this is post post apocalypse grandpa joe is the only man left alive after the singularity um and he's inviting a bunch of people into his workshop like he watched the rest of humanity like melt into like plasmic ooze and form back into the the life stream in the earth and he's the only one left and so he builds himself some kid friends and a dog out of toys who then help him continue his dark work um building uh i saw a dinosaur episode today. I watched this today. I'm coming off fresh off one of Grandpa Joe's

psychic wounds. Yeah, see, and that had nothing to do with me, so you only have yourself to blame in that case. I didn't choose it. It was fucking on when I walked in the room.

I would never choose Grandpa Joe's magical playground. Oh, that's another thing to mention. So a lot of these shows on Hulu only have like two or three episodes, and the episodes are only like 18 minutes long. So you'll just kind of leave the TV on

and you'll look up and suddenly you're watching a completely different show. Yeah, so... Like Grandpa Joe. Like Grandpa Joe, who has stuck with us somehow enough for me to like know about his dark deeds. Two thumbs emphatically down.

I would not recommend. One show that we kind of discovered in this way is Pororo. Not to be confused with pokoyo because uh baby's television shows are awesome pokoyo is about like again kind of another sort of blocky boy and his fun friends i think it's british maybe i'm probably wrong about the origins of like all of these shows um and it's it's kind of funny it's kind of cute it's like a little boy and like he moves kind of like a toy and he rolls around i don't have a lot to say about pocoyo

po ro ro though it's arctic adventure it's a penguin right little penguin he's got like a bear friend crocodile friend sea otter friend and they go on uh sort of wintery it's very yeah it's it's it has an arctic sort of setting and they teach each other moral lessons got another good theme song it's got a pretty decent, like the theme song is just a lot of Po Ro Ro's. And I mentioned this show only because Henry is obsessed with it. He's into it.

He's very into it. And I don't, to me, it's like, I can't think of too many things to say about Po Ro Ro because I put it on and like, it's kind of like razzle dazzle like the um like the pattern that they use this sort of camouflage because when you're looking directly at it like your mind can't like hone into it and so you just like look somewhere else when is this used i like military reasons um and so i can't think of anything because it comes on

and again maybe this is some Manchurian candidate shit but I just can't I can't focus there's no consistent you know most children's shows have kind of a consistent pattern each episode that the kids can kind of depend on and come to expect not Po Ro Ro

he defies those expectations yeah it's kind of Curious George-like in that each episode is completely different. And with that, perfect segue. Curious George. God, talk about CG.

Never do know what's around the bend. A big adventure or a brand new friend when you're curious. So Dr. John. Like curious, dude. Dr. John does the theme song.

Everything. And it's incredible. You ever seen Dr. John in concert? No. I have. Twice. Thanks, the theme song. Everything. And it's incredible. You ever seen Dr. John in concert? No. I have. Twice. Thanks, Bonnaroo. He's playing a band called Dr. John's Dumps to Funk.

That's nice. And they would play at like 13 in the morning at Bonnaroo when everyone was extra crunchy. We have watched the entire series, I guess the new series of Curious George, which is nine seasons, I believe. Do you want to talk about the the new series of Curious George, which is nine seasons, I believe. Do you want to talk about the origins of you and Curious George and Henry? I don't remember what the origins were. I mean, it was your 3 a.m. show. I mean, I had lots of, I have a whole segment that I want to do about 3 a.m. shows because

I have exposed our child to some stuff. But we've watched this entire show twice back to back and it was because it was the first television show that henry ever like liked it was the first one that wasn't just shapes and colors and like um it was for when we took our first plane ride like we brought curious george episodes on the on the ipad to like help him in case he got like freaked out because it is it was literally the most um henry was like pretty fussy when he was younger um well largely because of his food yeah he has a cow's milk protein allergy which um i think before i had a kid if i'd heard that phrase said out loud i would have thought it was like bullshit but oh trust us it sucks so so bad i would feed him he was hungry all the time because

he's a newborn i would feed him and within 15 minutes of eating he would start crying and then he wouldn't sleep like he just didn't he didn't sleep puking there was some burping it was very bad um and we used to just put stuff on TV because sometimes it would distract him. Yeah, he would sleep in basically 45 minute increments. And it was it was really it was it was really, really very tough on on on you. And this especially and me a little bit. It was about four months of his life. Yeah.

And so for a while we were trying to like grab onto any sort of foothold that we could get where like he would be you know happy and um content i guess is the word i'm looking for and curious george was the first television show that like i felt like was like got him there and so i owe a huge debt of gratitude to curious george it's a fun show with a fucking great theme song every day it's so good can i tell you a little bit about what i know on these characters and yeah sure because i'm curious about how this obviously this is a man in the big yellow hat yeah here's the thing so there's a lot about curious george that's kind of nebulous and you don't really think about it much because you're just following george from adventure to adventure and this is not this is not the because this was on when we were kids right wasn't there an old

show and this is new? I didn't research that. I think this started mid-2000s. So I looked up the characters. And it is not just us that is uncertain. The man in the yellow hat. The entry here says that... God, I gotta close this fucking window with Grandpa Joe's magic. I hate being confronted by this specter of death.

Here's what it says in the Wikipedia entry. It is unclear what his occupation is. Yeah. But in Curious George and the Invisible Sound, he has been asked to survey animals around the country house. And in the fully automatic monkey fun hat, Dr. Wiseman. That's the fucking best name of any TV show episode ever.

Dr. Wiseman has asked him to give a speech about the scientific method, which may imply that he has the same occupation he held in the 2006 film. But he's always at the fucking museum, like doing stuff. He's always at the museum. Here's another thing. So Professor Wiseman, who is his lady friend that works at the museum.

By the way, is that a romantic connection or not? Because they definitely go on at least one date during this series. It says, a scientist friend of George and the Man in the Yellow Hat. In different episodes, she is seen to be a rocket scientist and working at a local museum. I thought she was like a paleontologist or something. Everybody's got a lot of hats there's steve they here's what i know about the man in the big yellow hat which by the way when did the hat stop being big it wasn't it a big yellow hat it was never a big hat i think i might what am i thinking of i don't know big yellow joint that might be the arrested development job um he's got houses. They got the house in the city. They got the apartment in the city.

And then they go out to the country for a bit and kick it with Steve and, like, make some boats or whatever the fuck. What I want to talk about about Curious George, I enjoy the show. It is among my favorites of the shows that we have watched with our boy. I don't know that it imparts necessarily great lessons to the youths who watch it. Because in every episode, Curious George proves this remarkable ability to find the things that people who care about him cherish the most. And then he destroys those things as quickly as he possibly can. those things as quickly as he possibly can. That's kind of a theme, though, in children's programming is that, and maybe this is supposed to make children more comfortable about being

so unaware of the appropriate way to act, but you'll watch a lot of kids' shows and the main character is constantly doing terrible things and then ideally learning from that. Yes, that is definitely

a staple of like even up to like young adult programming it's like oh we fucked up let's find a way to make it right i get that curious george which by the way can he talk to kids can kids understand there's an episode where they played mini golf with some kids and they were like talking to curious george and it's like he's a monkey well remember the the country kid what's his name steve steve yeah steve seems to be able to maybe we'll just converse with him okay anyway there's an episode where he goes into a construction site where like a 10-story building is being built and he destroys it he destroys the building he destroys the 10-story building at the construction site like he's a like that's that's

that's crazy that's so that. That's so bad. And then they were like, oh, well, we like it better destroyed. Here's $10 to go buy some ice cream. Literally how the episode ends. Literally how the episode ends. Here's $10 to go buy some ice cream. Thank you for destroying our building. We like how it looks better now that it's destroyed.

Here's $10. And the man with the yellow hat just seems so tired all the time because he is constantly forgiving george for every for everything this is my very favorite clock my grandpa gave it to me well i'm gonna go to the store man in the big yellow hat that one's on you dude that one's on you had to know how that one was gonna end with you coming home and your clock is dismantled into 400 pieces hidden across six rooms yeah you fucking dummy i'm gonna give you my credit card go buy us a dozen donuts hey man in the big yellow hat you remember how you just taught him about the tens and hundreds place this motherfucker's gonna come back with 10 000 donuts

and that's on you because you gave a monkey your credit card i remember every fucking episode and then every third episode is like we're going to space and we need a monkey captain for the mission and then like curious george is flying through space or piloting a submarine under the ground or having an extended time traveling dream sequence. And it's like, why do we need soft sci-fi in the show? Oh, and then the musical interludes. There's musical interludes that pop up. Occasionally there are episodes where there is a song that is written about George's adventures

and it is not Dr. John. And it's surprising. It's a review every time it's a, it's a, it's a showcase of talent. And I, I'm so grateful.

Thank you. Curious George. Thank you. CG, you wonderful monkey. Please just stop breaking like all my shit all the time. What else we got on here? Little Einstein's.

I don't know what else to say. I guess I, this was a Justin and Sydney tips us because charlie's a fan and henry definitely enjoyed it there's a lot of classical music references to painters and dancers yeah i enjoy sort of like i don't know anything about classical music and so it's nice to hear like a chopin piece and i'm like oh this is nice I really appreciated it it felt like such a um oh man who's the kid on Simpsons Martin Martin it was

such a fucking Martin like team it literally should be called team discovery channel and I appreciated it and I'm not saying there's any obviously God I'm not saying there's anything wrong with being like a a nerd and watching a show called Little Einstein's but it felt like it felt a little it felt a little, especially because it was like targeted for babies,

and it was like hearing a kid say like, Glissando! And it's like, stop, come on. You know what got on my nerves? So there's a rocket ship that they power to go on adventures. My favorite rocket ship. And in order to power the rocket ship ship they all have to pat their legs and it just sometimes they pat in mesoforte and it's like you kids just became insufferable

because it would be like pat pat pat pat sydney's patting pat pat tommy's patting not his name pat i don't remember how dare you but i just i found it i just that part used a lot of shows with participation like basically all of them which henry can't do which henry can't do because he can't move he is basically a little beanbag chair he can move he can move he's like a beanbag chair that wiggles he's a wiggly beanbag chair um speaking of music we can talk about beatbox. You would have forgotten. So this is what's crazy. We've been doing this.

We've been parents for eight months now. Yes. And the sheer tonnage of children's programming we've watched is such that we have completely forgotten shows that we have watched literally every episode of this year. The problem is, is that we started really early at a certain point, Griffin and I convinced ourselves that we couldn't watch stuff that we normally watch with Henry,

which is dumb, like Henry's not paying attention, which was dumb. And so we started watching kids programming because it seemed to interest him from a very young age uh and so we've been doing this for so long now that we've blown through most of the shows that we might actually enjoy with him in a couple years right um i mean we'll come back to it i'll re-watch beat bugs um i think he enjoyed beat bugs this is very colorful it is sort of it is one of the better animated shows it's very like pixar styled and um i guess like the big hook of it is they secured the rights for music by the beatles and so every episode is

titled the same thing as a beetle song and then you hear like a cover of a beetle song that like these kids or like some special guest sing. And sometimes they get like legit singers to come on and do these covers. Bugs, let's be clear. There are no kids on the show. Well, the bugs are kids. They're young bugs.

Which brings up like, I have so many questions about this already, which is like, can bugs hear music? Because if so, that's fucked up. Like what if I accidentally goose one? And they were like, they had a, when I goose a little ant and they had a favorite song, that's fucked up.

I never thought about that. You think about that and it's like we should start paying attention when you listen to music, whether the bugs come out. We get wasp nests up in our roof a lot that I have to like spray with a murder spray. When I do that, am I killing a little wasp who's like my favorite song is linger by the cranberry i don't like that i don't like thinking about that you know i'm such a fool for you dead dead gone forever i don't like that what if they're singing a song in there we just can't i don't like it i don't like it um there's sort of like a honey i shrunk the kids thing going on where like they're in this big backyard and so there's like a bike will roll through actually maybe half the episodes start

out with them almost being killed by like a tire rolling through or a big rock a big smartphone falls and like crushes one of the kids and they're like oh no well we're bugs what do you want um what i want to talk about this show is the way that they sometimes back into song titles this is on netflix by the way it's like a netflix original and i think they thought like okay we got the whole beatles catalog we don't want to burn all the fucking hits from from word one like all you need is love is title track and so that one's gone that one's out of the way um we can't do you know eight days a week and um oh my god i've suddenly forgotten every beatle song i've ever written uh you know paperback you

see the ones i like aren't like the big popular ones i can't think god i just sound like the biggest hipster piece of shit ever but we should give an example so i remember an episode where they did for the benefit of of Mr. Kite. Okay, yeah, that's what I wanted to talk about. So come together, Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds. Like, these are big songs, right? And they don't want to burn through everything that was on, like, the Beatles' one collection or whatever. And so you get an episode called For the Benefit of Mr. Kite.

And my mind is working as I see that title pop up on the screen because like um come together you can imagine when an episode about that is like like everybody falls somebody falls down a hole and they have to like chain together to help pull them up while singing come together cool it is always plot relevant lucy in the sky with diamonds there's an episode where like one of the bugs is having trouble sleeping because they have nightmares and so they go see like this magic grasshopper who is lucy in the sky with diamonds okay cool for the benefit of mr kite did a lot of work on that one i i imagine when they're writing these episodes somebody comes in just complete silence and in like a dry erase marker writes for the benefit of mr kite and then sits

down at a conference table and just says go go. And they all have to figure out how they can work elements of that song into the story. There's an episode called Penny Lane, which I guess they just build an auditorium and call it Penny Lane. That one's not especially. Magical Mystery Tour is like,

when I'm 64 is an episode. And it's like, how do we get, how do you you children bugs get to that it's and and then it's a mystery and then the music's pretty good and it's colorful and nice i like beat bugs i completely forgot it existed until griffin reminded me heartbreaking apparently there's two seasons we gotta get back in there um hey you know my favorite show what is it uh i was gonna say home improvement but it's not true but i was trying to think of like a way to get into the money zone could you do me like a beatles

intro like a beatles stinger into the can i steal you away ad break uh sure sure um yesterday okay sorry about that don't be sorry that was the best fucking thing our sponsor this week is honest tea honest tea excellent uh rosebuddies is supported in part by honesty for almost 20 years honesty the makers you're saying we've been supported by 20 years for 20 years it's the longest running podcast in history okay for almost 20 years honest tea the makers of the nation's top selling organic bottled teas and organic kids juice drinks has committed to being authentic and transparent through its organic and fair trade certified products i've had honesty before have you i have yeah it's really good i'm a tea fan uh we are joining honest tea and

celebrating the ways we're less than perfect through the refreshingly honest project oh shit what are we airing out this time our refreshingly honest moment is you made our kid watch grandpa joe's magical playground our refreshingly honest moment is that sometimes our favorite tv shows to put on at night are the ones that allow us to do something else besides paying attention to the TV. So my example of this, and this is still a good show, but often we will put on American Ninja Warrior. You're pretending like we don't pay attention. I watch that.

I like to look at my Facebook. Okay, fair, fair, fair. And watch American Ninja Warrior. There's some shows we don't like. Daring's Harris House, it is. Lock on. Do not talk. Do not look at your phone.

We are in it. American Ninja Warrior, for some reason, Rachel and I have this unspoken pact that we are just going to watch every episode of this entire season, which is bananas to me. But I'm getting to the point where I know all of them by name, and that's fucked up. And I know it is. You can share the fun and funny ways you're less than perfect on social media and use

the hashtag refreshingly honest. And for every time the hashtag refreshingly honest is shared, Honest Tea will donate a dollar to Vision Spring up to $25,000, which helps provide affordable vision care for people in need. Learn more by visiting HonestTea.com slash podcast. Honest Tea, refreshingly honest. I got a Jumbotron message. This one is for Amelia, and it's from Louie, who says, Happy anniversary, Amelia, my love. Right now you are on the PCT and kicking its ass.

PCT. Pacific Coast Trail. Is that it? I think so. Yeah, that makes sense. But soon we'll finally, finally live together and life will be so, so sweet. Please accept this audio rose

from your favorite podcast host. And if Griffin and Rachel ever saw you, I know they would agree your freckles are just the dang cutest smooch i don't know that i would say that to a person i don't know um but i'm you know we might think it i don't know yeah no i'm a freckle fan good luck out there by the way on that long hard road uh you're doing something that i think is actually impossible and nobody's ever done and it's really just a big uh when people say like, I've walked up the country.

I just think like, oh, it's a fun joke you're playing on. But I'm sure you can do it and be the first person ever. Congratulations. Keep pushing. Don't worry about the calluses. Suck the venom out. Let's go. Let's do it.

Way to go, Amelia. This next message is for red double exclamation mark emoji. And it is from Sweet Young Coconut. Happy birth-sy. You got it. It says, hap birth to my bud. Yeah, that's good. No, that's a cool way to say it. It's not a typo. It's not a character limit thing. No way. Okay. Hap birth to my bud, my dude, my best friend, who is hopefully almost or recently 20 as you hear this.

We're all almost or recently 20 if you think about it. Some of us less recent than others. I miss you, but hopefully by the time you hear this, we're hanging out and BIP is happening. You'll watch an actual episode of this franchise yet. But yeah, love you, dude. Here's to road trips and the impossible dream of small to mid-sized animals. Oh, I get it. They're tough.

They're tough to get a beat on. Small to mid-sized. I need a large one. I need a large one just so I can keep track of them. Give me a... Well, a horse. Are you talking about our 20-pound cat? I'm talking about our big nightmare cat

who hates the concept of sleep. He hates the concept of human sleep. We can do a whole episode about how shitty our cat is. He's a sweet prince from heaven. I don't want to push our listeners that far. That's true. This episode is already a little much. Creativity, comedy, and friendship.

All these things and more are waiting for you at MaxFunCon East at the maybe haunted Pocono Manor, September 1st through 3rd. We only have a few tickets left, and they're on sale right now. So head on over to maxfuncon.com to buy your tickets. Don't miss out. Can I talk about some, you mentioned earlier the 3 a.m. block that I used to occupy with our boy. And this was for about three months, where he would, he was waking up like a lot and you would just like

feed him and then you'd both go back to bed well no that's oversimplifying that is i'm grossly oversimplifying the reason that griffin would take the 3 a.m block is that henry woke up every hour and a half to two hours and what would happen is he would eat and then I would have to hold him perfectly still until he fell asleep again. And sometimes if this continued for a long time, I would start to fall asleep while I was holding him. And that's a bad situation. So that's when Griffin would step in. So I would step in and abscond into the living room for usually about an hour and a half or or so usually maybe an hour and a half to two hours so you could get some sleep and i could get henry to sleep and then i would

just kind of like chill out there um for a while and while i did that i watched some fucking television i also got deeply into chess because it was like a game i could play on my phone with one hand and i think about how like i played chess like hours a day every day and i have not played it in like five months i got so into it but i got in that time in that witching hour i got so into a lot of things that i don't really fuck around with anymore so like i watched most of twin peaks which is maybe too challenging a show for baby minds. Yes, I would say so. But he was deeply asleep in the times that I was watching it. I watched The O.C.

In that one, I felt comfortable. We would go out there, and he would still be awake after I brought him out there, and I'd be like, these are your friends, Ryan and Seth and Summer and Marissa and Taylor Townsend. And that's Sandy Cohen, and here's why he's important to me and i don't know those lessons were necessarily getting through um one of the first shows i watched with him just because i had started i watched the first episode the day before he was born was yuri on ice which is an ice skating uh anime that i was hoping maybe i don know, like there's a lot of very good animation

and colorful anime handsome boys sort of skating around. I thought maybe that would grab his attention. But no, I think maybe it was a little too soon for that as well. I treasured those times, although I realized that this is not exactly kids programming. And maybe we should get right back down into the... Yeah, a lot of times Griffin would watch these shows and he would hold henry until henry was deep asleep and then he would come back into the bedroom and set henry down and henry would immediately wake up because i would

keep him out there for too long but i in the meantime i had gotten some right and sometimes he would fall asleep and i'd be like well i'm gonna watch a couple more episodes of yuri and just come back in but it was weird because you and i like do you and i like have very few shows that the other person doesn't watch it's true um all the shows that we watch really like you watch um i like scandal just scandal and jane the version i'm like i don't i don't really watch those sometimes we start a show and i think it's going to be one that we're both going to get down on. And then I go on a trip and I get back and you're like, hey, I finished Orange is the New Black. And I'm like, well, okay, I'm probably not going to watch that then. And this was the first time that I felt like I had a ton of shit that I would like, oh, there's this show Yuri on Ice.

It's great. Well, if you wanted to keep waking up at 3 a.m. and watching your shows'm sure you know i'm sure you could do that oh i watched so much anime which was weird because i really didn't watch it growing up except for i guess pokemon counts um but i got a crunchyroll subscription specifically to watch yuri on ice and then it's just i watched so much in these blocks and since he stopped waking up at this time it was like i formed this weird sort of like symbiotic thing in my mind where it's like 3 a.m is where i get on and i watch like anime which i don't like i just don't do at any other point in the day and so i love that you're nostalgic for this now i am i'm a little

nostalgic because it was like a weird i i did a lot of things from 3 to 4 30 a.m that i don't do anymore because they were my 3 to 4 30 a.m things and i know that sounds weird but like that comes with the territory of having like a fucking fourth meal added on to your day i am nostalgic for the times where we watched all of the office we watched oh my god we watched all of the office in a month and a half it was wild how much of that show we watched so quickly oh god it was nice though it's comforting if that show is watched so quickly. Oh, God, it was nice, though. It was comforting. That show is fucking comfort food. Yeah. Let's talk about some kids' programming.

Can we talk about the show? I've been dying to talk about this entire episode. Let's talk about the show that you've been dying to talk about this entire episode. Because it's important. It's an important work. It belongs in the... It's international. It's an important work it belongs in the the you know it's international it's an international sort of there is a uk version and a u.s version voiced by different oh i don't like

that no no no no i cannot imagine different voices coming out of these beautiful perfect four mouths this show available on hulu is called rough rough tweet and Tweet, and Dave. It is about a trio of animals. With a sort of a guide, a sort of spiritual guide. Yes, there's Hattie the hamster that leads them through a series of puzzles. Of saw-like flesh games. Rough, Rough, as you might expect, is a dog. Tweet, as you might expect, is a dog. Tweet, as you might expect, is a bird.

He's a little fucking nerdy birdie. And then there's Dave. Dave's a blue panda. Dave is a panda bear. But he's blue. He's absolutely blue. And this started my fiction. And I think, in a lot of ways, was the impetus for this very episode of the podcast.

This episode, we got excited about talking about Ruff Ruff Tweetin' Dave, mostly because of the number of times it would require us to say the words Ruff Ruff Tweetin' Dave. It's a good fucking name for a tv show and if you think if you're assuming that it's going to be some sort of like cheeky um like kids love it but it's great for adults too like it's sort of like edgy humor i feel like the name rough off tweet and dave has a sort of like invader zim sensibility to it where you hear it and you think like oh this is going to be full of like little jokes and jabs for mature audience no it's a puzzle show for children yes but here's the thing here's what i love okay so dave dave is a blue panda and i guess it would be difficult to name a panda following the convention of rough rough and tweet

because we don't yeah what do you call a panda pandas don't make we met some pandas a couple years ago we did they were great so i developed this fiction in which the creator of the show had a brother named dave and dave was particularly interested in being um represented on the show and so I just imagine a lot of conversations where the creator was saying, I'm going to do this kid's show. It's going to be a dog and a bird and a panda. At which point his brother was like,

hey, name one of them Dave. And the creator thought, well, but it, I mean, it doesn't really make sense because there's going to be rough rough and tweet. It's like, name that panda Dave. And then the creator would say, well, I don't know why. And make sure that Dave always goes to sleep first because I'm a tired guy and Dave should

be tired too. Dave's very tired and he loves bananas. And so the panda bear, if you'll notice at the end of every episode, goes to sleep first. Yeah. So you're getting way way way ahead you gotta understand babe you are talking to somebody who has consumed lots and lots of rough rough tweet and dave we are talking to a an uninoculated audience so we need to be delicate about this because what you just said is the most wild thing out of context

that anybody's ever heard this is a true this is a it's a show where like every episode is like has a it's educational right it's like a lot of these shows that it's sort of education haddy will present puzzles and each episode is sort of like themed so it's like today we're going to learn about opposites right the idea of what opposites are and so you go or or like we'll do directions today's all about directions and so they have to like follow this path and it's like oh here's a here's a log let's go under it and then later on you come back to the log and hattie the hamster is like do you remember which way to go for the log and then each of the animals will present a different answer

and so rough rough will say like you go through it and then tweet will say like you go under it and dave is like you eat it because he's a fucking dummy and then hattie the hamster is like tweets right the rest of you were incorrect and you know what that means there's a key in your stomach that you have to vomit up to the shackles of bone around um and so at the end this continues on like there's five or six of these little junctions where it's like who's the three of them say some shit and it's like what color is an apple and ruff ruff is like you know black and tweets like green or red or sometimes yellow and dave is like purple because he's fuck so fucking dumb i read a review of this show where somebody was very critical of the fact that

dave is always made to be the the fat slow one well there's some episodes though we just watched one and this is what this is the the strength of this sort of design is that we watch this show a lot and all and i don't know why maybe it is this like participation element i cannot look away from rough rough tweet and dave i am i am terrace house honed in on this fucking show you know and so there are episodes where i watch and i follow the patterns like the opposite day episode where like the other two are fucking up nonstop. And Dave's like, nah, I got this. And he gets like three in a row. And I'm like, babe, babe, babe.

Dave's on a streak. Dave's crushing it. Can I tell you something? When I was reading the details about Ruff Ruff tweeting Dave, Dave is the only character to ever get a hat trick. Oh, shit. Really? Yeah. Dave is the only character to ever get a hat trick. Oh, shit. Really? Yeah.

Typically, there are three puzzles every episode, and usually it's spread relatively evenly between the three characters. All right. Maybe I'm being too hard on Dave. Dave is wrong a lot. But when he's on, when he's fucking hot, he's hot. I really think that somewhere out there, there is real dave on which this panda is based i think somewhere out there is a large betting pool of people who wait for new episodes of rough i'm not joking people who watch this and they're like all right i think tweet gets two rough rough gets

one and of course dave goes to sleep first we got to talk about the dave goes to sleep first thing because at the end of every episode they they get on the spin again which is the magic ship and they get around and they go in their pods which let's which by the way let's talk about that because that's wild um and then how the hamster shows you a little pop-up a like little image of all three of them in their pods and he says who's gonna go to sleep first and dave inevitably goes to sleep first and how do the hamster says it's dave it's always dave is now where i should have done my dave inevitably goes to sleep first and hattie the hamster says it's dave it's always dave is now where i should have done my dave impression probably this would be the time to talk about that you tried to get to the end part first which is a wild way of talking about this

show i was just so eager because it makes total sense to me that somewhere out there there is a guy that calls his brother once a week and says this next episode make dave so that he runs real fast because i like to run real fast can you make him jump real high give him big balls no dave i can't do that um man rough rough tweeting dave i can't believe we're talking about it on this fucking podcast when we first, I didn't think we'd ever talk about it on this podcast. Henry seems to really like it. He seems to enjoy it a lot. And I don't think I like it.

I don't think it's a very good show. But because it is participatory, I feel like this show is meeting me halfway, in a way. Where it's like, hey, we don't want to be here either. But do you want to exclaim out loud that you griffin also know what color an apple is yeah griffin does play along i do i get excited when my friends do well not tweet because i feel like tweet is like batting like 60 60 tweet is like right and rough rough gets some in sometimes but rough rough is sort of the moral center of the show and so it's not a huge when dave comes at you with three in a row it's like that's some blue panda shit you are

on my friend good work now i do want to talk about as far as i know we've watched hundreds of episodes of rough rough tweet and dave why are there only four animals left on this whole earth it's sort of like a sonic the hedgehog green hill zone sort of vibe to this world and they do sleep in little sorry coffins hattie the hamster doesn't have a coffin where does he sleep does he sleep on the magic spaceship why is he putting them through these challenges and where is fucking everybody on the spin again i think he's probably sleeping on the spin again and that's sad uh the kids have little robot cars that they drive around in that plugs into the spin again and it's like that's a little bit confusing um are they sort of

animatronic living dolls and the rest of humanity sort of died out is this in the same universe as grandpa joe's magical playground where there's only one man left and the three animatronic dolls are looking for him i mean if we're going to talk children's programming we should talk teletubbies because that is the same kind of post-apocalyptic yeah there are only this many creatures left in the world and they're all super weird and have televisions in there how does the baby sun sort of fit into oh you know there's no explaining it it was a solar flare that like burned out it was an emp burned out all the electronics mankind destroyed itself you name all the teletebbies no popo tinky winky that's two is that good dipsy how do you know this what the fuck la la why do you know this

what the fuck when i was early high school i had a friend who was like you got to watch this show it's super weird okay so that's i mean and also if you sing the theme song in your head they introduce themselves much like rough rough tweet and dave thank you rough oh rough rough tweet and dave we should i don't know if this is fair use can i play a little bit of the theme song of rough rough tweet and dave i'll actually edit it in so it doesn't sound shitty okay but the theme song has like a section in the middle that is the most sort of wild lyrical gymnastics I've ever heard, where it's like, for a second in the middle of the song, it's as if the composer and writer of the song were like, let's just stop rhyming for a little bit. And it's a very bold strategy.

Are you talking about the hip hop breakdown? No. No, I'm just teasing. There's no hip-hop breakdown. Maybe we should wrap. Can we talk about missed, like, dodged bullets? Because you mentioned Teletubbies, and I thought about, like, there are some shows that, like, when I was in, like, high school and college that i knew kids were watching i was like wow that seems shitty and now that we have a kid who i'm sure will grow up and watch some really bad television show that will in some large way become our lives

that there are some uh uh things that i want to talk about the fucking wiggles because we watched like two episode of it and i was like i cannot with you all it's weird absolutely can't with you all it's weird there well this is true with a lot of children's performers there's something kind of robotic and also um they have been captured against their will and forced to perform these numbers. Two of them are just sort of are older gentlemen who are just bouncing around and playing a little silly guitar and along with the other members of the band

just sing a little song about brushing your teeth. And I'm never not going to be sort of put off by that. Yeah, we gave it a shot. I just see what the fuss was about. And it was awful. Same goes for Caillou. We did not fuck with Caillou. Because from what I understand, Caillou is heroin.

And if you give a kid a bump of Caillou, the kid will never get off Caillou. And Caillou is apparently the biggest piece of shit on earth. Yeah, we have heard under no circumstances should we ever watch Caillou. And the biggest piece of shit on earth. Yeah. We have heard under no circumstances should we ever watch Caillou. And so we have not. Astroblast is pretty good though. And sorry,

I'm looking at the list. Astroblast is good. It's about an interstellar smoothie shop. Love that shit. Saranduck is good. Hungry Henry. We'd mainly watched that because it has Henry in the title, but it's about a very curious cat who learns about where food comes from.

What else do I have on here? The Notekins. Rachelachel likes them i think it's the worst television show maybe in the history it's literally just a bunch of notes and they're like here's the ladder let's go up and then it plays a scale like as they go up the ladder and it's like uh-oh let's go down and that's fucking it that's all that the notekins is it. It is poison. It is brain poison. And I am a worse person for watching Notekins. Here's the thing. Henry likes music. Yes. I think that that is a worthwhile interest of his.

And so anytime there is a show that incorporates music of any kind, I think to myself, he'll enjoy this. And it is beneficial. That's not why you like the show, though. Tell people why you like the show. Okay. Because I know the reason why you like the show, though. Tell people why you like the show. Okay. Because I know the reason why you like the show. There is usually a scene in every episode where each note can, sounds their note.

And in order to sound their note or musical instrument, they jump up and spread their legs. And so I convinced myself, it's kind of a way to entertain myself that every time they did that, they were passing gas. What a diplomatic way to phrase that, baby. It's like a fun thing to think that this little piano sound that was coming out of them

was actually the sound of them having gas. Just go check it out it's fun i mentioned story bots earlier it's fucking great story bots is just there's only six episodes of story bots on netflix there's story bots asks or story bots answers story bots ask story bots and it's pretty good but story bots songs are like fucking dope they're so good uh sunshine is yellow is a song just google story bots sunshine is yellow and listen to it it is a 2017 summer jam um we tried um big block sing-song it's kind of similar yeah it's similar um there's also other shows we've tried that just henry's too little like like thomas uh thomas i

mentioned steven universe who watched a little that when he's really really young but he just didn't engage with it at all. Yeah, I think that's it. Oh, Baby First TV. That's more of a brand. The only one of those that really I can remember is Harry the Bunny, because it's kind of Muppet-like, but we don't have to go into that. I do love the theme song. My child, me and Baby First TV. In times when I wasn't sleeping well and i was watching that with henry that song used to make me emotional my child uh let's wrap up though hey

sorry about this episode i probably wasn't what you wanted uh probably when you thought you were going to tune into and you loaded this up in your car or whatever for the road trip you're going to love this podcast you told your friends they say really catty stuff about the bachelor and bachelorette. And then we talked about rough, rough tweet and Dave for about 25 months. Um, but we just, man, this,

so such was the extent to which we did not want to talk about the mental. Um, finale is next week though. Looking forward to that. Look for that three hours. Are you fucking kidding? It's always three hours.

Griffin. it always hurts though to remember i know um yes thank you for listening thank you to maximum fun for having us on the network you can go to maximumfund.org uh and check out all the great shows shows like um one bad mother and lady to lady and pop rocket pop rocket and stop podcasting yourself and jordan jesse go and judge on hodgman uh all kinds of great shows all at maximum fun.org we have other shows that we do and video stuff that you can find at mackleroyshows.com um anything else thank you to the listeners that have specifically said they could listen to us talk about anything here is us doing that yeah what now eat your fucking words uh yeah i think that's it finale

next week and then who knows after that well well we kind of know we'll keep you posted we'll keep you posted we got some we got some fun ideas um till next time oh uh we have a p.o box also it's p.o box 66639 austin te. 787-66. Till next time. Thank you for listening. I'm Griffin McElroy. I'm Rachel McElroy. When you're ready. My child.

Sing it, baby. Me and baby first TV. My child. Me and baby first TV. That was almost harmony. I love you. That was almost harmony. I love you. I love you too.

My child, me and Baby First TV. My child, me and Baby First TV. My child, me and Baby First TV. Maximumfun.org. Comedy and culture. Artist owned. Listener supported. What the f*** is an interview? I mean, I do not know.

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