Wonderful! - Roze Buddiez: Good Things That We Like

Episode Date: July 5, 2017

There was no new episode of The Bachelorette this week, but we wanted to record SOMETHING, and this is the result of that desire. We're basically just talking about our favorite stuff in the least Goopy way we can muster. MaxFunDrive ends on March 29, 2024! Support our show now by becoming a member at maximumfun.org/join.

Maybe you should go and do some contemplating. Right reasons, right reasons, being a good girl for all the right reasons. Right reasons, right reasons, being a good girl for all the right reasons. I'm the best of it, and I'm rapping to your poolside. Here to find true love, one man, one woman, one life. Hi, this is Rachel McElroy. Hi, this is Griffin McElroy. And this is Rose Buddies.

Is it? Is it really, though? A lot of scientists and experts, five out of 18 of them agree that this is Rose Buddies. Hi, I'm sick. I'm sorry about that. I have a sinus thing. I don't know, man.

I think I'm on like an every other week schedule now with my body. Do I need to do yoga? Do I need to find somewhere to release the toxins from my system? Because all my nodes, babe, they're just flooded with, you know. You know what? I guarantee you, you're going to get a lot of suggestions to do the neti pot. Oh, don't even talk to me about the neti pot. I invented the fucking neti pot. We just came

from the beach. Beach, let's go get away. And I tried to... Our friend Evan talked to our neighbors under their tent and he had three boogie boards and two of them were for children. And this whole plan was fucked from the start, but he convinced the man to let us borrow these three boogie boards. And I took one of the kid ones and I was out there catching some fucking waves. And I, you know, I was out there doing my thing, hanging torso. And, um, I caught a big one and I pushed the, the nose of the board.

You know, I tried to pull it up a little bit, catch a little bit more of that. Somehow I manipulated the situation and I got thoroughly douched in every hole by this big, powerful wave. And so I basically neti-potted myself kind of with the ocean. I also lost my fucking prescription sunglasses.

It's the worst basically day of my life. You know what's interesting is that I knew you were going out there to do that. Why did you? I guess my question is why you let me. You know what I realized is that I didn't. It was a child's boogie board for a little boy. Well, one, I didn't know that.

Okay. But also, I didn't watch you at all. Babe. I did not have that instinct. I guess we had our son and like. Yeah, I was watching our son. He wasn't doing any fucking rad extreme sports, but like whatever. I get it. He's good to look at anyway uh there was no episode of the bachelorette this week

and we didn't want to not do an episode again because we just skipped one because they also didn't have an episode like two weeks ago or whatever that was the nba finals yeah and this one was just like they weren't feeling it i guess like july 3rd and we're like that we might lose some viewers let's not do it yeah sure um and was, like, July 3rd, and we're like, eh, we might lose some viewers. Let's not do it. Yeah, sure. And so, we wanted to still do an episode, and we, like, talked about what we could do an episode about, and it was, like, do we just do Terrace House?

Like, no, we did Terrace House, and honestly, I have really, really enjoyed Aloha State, but I don't want to really, like, go back and rewatch all of it in a week so we can, like, take notes on it and shit. is there some bachelor bachelorette thing we want to do like no not really um we to be frank talk about that show a lot not during this episode so a little break from that is actually kind of sweet um and so what we talked about is just like um you want me to take over yeah why don't you take over because your voice sounds so rough it sounds really bad is the only thing uh so griffin and i when we started this show we wanted to talk about a show that we loved uh which at the time was the

bachelor right uh and then we lately have had a more problematic relationship with it and we're realizing that a lot of our discussions are not focused on love as much as disgust which is not like i feel weird complaining about that right because it's like we didn't we didn't like make a decision to do that it's just like it's to the point now where um i don't i don't i don't love watching the show as much as I used to because I think the show has gotten more and more harmful and bad, right? And so what we talked about was for this episode,

what if we just talked about stuff that does make us happy and stuff that we love and possibly if we can do it in a way that is not full-blown like Gwyneth Paltrow goop, like you've got to get fucking gooseberry bubble tea. Yeah. It'll empty out your tear ducts. And it's like,

okay, goop. Um, and I will say that, that Griffin and I have identified some things to talk about, but we have not shared them with each other. This is very exciting for me. I also don't know how many things you picked up.

This may be like a 10 minute long episode, which frankly, I would love to go get back on that big, beautiful couch and watch more Great British Baking Show with you. So let's just see what happens and talk about some stuff that we're excited about that makes us very happy. And can I start off? Yes, please. start off yes please mine is the starting point the very first one in this backdoor pilot of our good goop is 12 hours who to fed and this is one is an obvious pick for obvious reasons we were talking about this on the couch there's a lot of medicine where when i take it i i can potentially forget i've taken medicine like i say i got a sore back, so I'll pop a couple Ibu's.

I'll take a couple Profins. And I don't know why, by the way, my painkiller brand loyalty is so... I noticed that. I've never seen you take, like, an Advil, for example. I just love these little Ibu Profins. Maybe it's just the form factor. It's all the same, like, right? It's all the same medicine.

Please don't at me. And so, you take a couple Ibu's. You pop, right? It's all the same medicine. Please don't at me. And so you take a couple of iBooBoos. You pop a couple of iBooBoos because you got a sore back or a sore neck or your shoulders hurt. And maybe you feel better and better and maybe you don't. But the fact remains is that I'm not thinking the whole time like I've got this good iBoo energy coursing through my veins making me powerful making me strong making me forget my weaknesses ibuprofen is weakness leaving the body but i don't i'm not constantly thinking about it 12 hours pseudofed and by the way fuck off with that four hour shit like i can't believe four hour pseudofed still gets to be called pseudofed i know it's a totally

different active ingredient it's like it's like if you called like um you know diet Dr. Pepper bullet bourbon like it's two completely fucking different things it's four hour bullet bourbon no it's a different thing please don't drink and take

Sudafed I would never fuck with that I'm stone cold sober recording this Bachelor podcast right now except for the Sudafed except for this 12 hour Sudafed which when this motherfucker rolls up on your system osmosis jones style it makes itself known that it is present for the whole half day it's like what's up with your maybe this is just my story my struggle because i get like sinus infections um like 16 times a year but like i pop one of these boys and it's just like what i'm in your fucking face i'm fighting all this

stuff out and i'm making you feel really weird in your brain like hey did you realize your mouth's been hanging open for 45 minutes that's me pseudofed i'm up here 12 hours for 12 whole hours you know what it makes me feel like? Because I also love Sudafed. I don't love it because it's like a psychedelic drug. I really do suffer from very frequent sinus problems. And it's the only pill I take in my life. I take a fucking Beano when I'm gassy.

And I'm like, oh, am I not gassy anymore? I guess, whatever. I take a Sudafed and it's like, fucking faith healing has been done to me. It makes me feel like a bag of popped popcorn oh and that like my whole head is kind of blown out a little bit like open concept head and i can breathe and suddenly it's like there's just nothing but air just circulating through my my entire head region last night though took it at 9 p.m my dreams babe were fucked up i was thinking when i was laying down like how i was going to start the finale for the adventure

zone the next episode and somehow i got started thinking about a scene in which some characters were frying up some potatoes in a pan. And for some reason, like, I could, I dreamed about people frying up potatoes in a pan in the Adventure Zone episode that was coming up for like six hours. Oh no. I was trying so furiously to make it fit, and I just couldn't, I couldn't figure out a way to do it. Anyway, 12 Hours-hour pseudo fed it is it's you gotta put your name on a list if you want it that's the other thing i get why i i'm

i'm mad at the player and the game at this point because um 12-hour pseudo fed you have to like go to the prescription counter and put your name on a list to get it and that sucks because today's fourth of july and i needed more 12-hour pseudo-fed you went to the pharmacy to pick some up for me couldn't do it you brought home that four-hour dog shit joke i didn't want to come home empty-handed but i know that's not the good stuff if i take three of them mathematically is it gonna get me there no damn it wait how many of the 12 are you're just taking one right yeah babe come on i respect here's the other thing. I respect 12-hour Sudafed. I'll be frank. I'm scared of 12-hour Sudafed.

It's so effective. And it's annoying. It's annoying that I have to put my name on the list and go talk to another human being in order to get it. But at the same time, people who use this to make drugs, I get it. But at the same time, people who use this to make drugs, I get it. I remember going to the doctor because I had a real bad allergy season one year and asking about taking Sudafed, like how many days in a row I could take it. And I remember the doctor telling me that there are people that take it every day. Those people are just rolling through life. That's probably dangerous.

Yes, definitely. Can I tell you about something I like? Yeah, please. The mystery flavor of Dum Dums. Okay, here we are. Here we are. So this is the white Dum Dum, right? When you unwrap it, like it's sort of like a semi-translucent white.

As I recall, yes. Sort of a clear flavor. Okay, let's get of like a semi-translucent white. As I recall, yes. Sort of a clear flake. Okay, let's get into this. Okay. Dum Dums I can fuck with, by the way. That is the perfect size for a hard candy experience. That is like the main thrust of my argument. Okay, okay, okay.

I am not somebody that can even finish a Blow Pop. Like, I make myself... What is that face? I didn't make it. It was the sickness. Well, and a Blow Pop and a Tootsie Pop sickness well in a blow pop and a tootsie pop a charles blow pop and a tootsie pop is you get you get so excited the whole time you're working to get to the center and then you get to the center and then especially with a fucking charms blow pop it's like oh i'm here oh this is it oh god some nasty gum with shards in it

cool it's like the size of a dime i would say but spherical well you got to be careful in this um backdoor pilot because i'm pretty sure people know what a dum-dum is right i i want to assume they don't you buy them in a bag and the bag has five fucking hundred of them because dum-dums are so little and so good or you go to a bank okay and maybe you get one there they are the national candy of banks okay do you want to know a little bit about dum-dums i would love you have dum-dum facts i didn't i don't have facts for any of mine i just i wanted to add some richness okay enrich me okay 1924 is when they started in ohio the great depression they were like we got to cut these lollipop sizes in half

stupid chips it's it's a fucking luxury. And let me tell you about the mystery flavor in particular. Wait, are you seriously about to, is this like we're on season one of Lost and you're about to like ruin the end of it? Like, are you literally about to tell me? I think it's really exciting. Can I guess what the flavor is before? Is that not fun?

No, go ahead. I've always thought it was sort of like a pina colada flavor. I thought I always tasted kind of either a pina colada or like a cream soda. A cream soda might be it. Yeah. Okay. So dum-dums are made in 16 flavors with new flavors rotating into the mix every so often. The mystery flavor is a result of the end of one batch mixing with the next batch.

Oh my God. So rather than stopping production to clean machines, the first batch into the next batch is the mystery flavor. It's like a transitional dum-dum. Which makes me recognize why maybe it always tastes like pina colada is maybe that's the strongest flavor they got. A pina colada is the world's strongest. It's the world's most assertive flavor. That's so interesting. So wait, so does every mystery flavor dum-dum, is all of them different?

That's what I'm wondering. Is all different? That is maybe what I'm wondering now. Mystery flavor has only been around since 2001. That's when we all got fucking lazy. Back in the 20s, they would have a fleet of kids jumping into the lollipop tumblers. That's what the actual lollipop guild is. Do you know they would have like a fleet of kids like jumping into the lollipop tumblers that's what the actual lollipop guild is do you know that from wizard of oz as a factual fact from the dum-dum factory they would just throw like six to twelve kids into the into the vat and

they would just you know have to scrape off all the crumbles and whatever they could fit in their um you know their overall pockets they could bring that home to the family and that's dinner for a night because the depression wasn't anything to fuck with but in 2000s you're talking about kid flavored lollipops right now no i'm saying the kids would bring all the shards from you know the the day's lollipop making back home to the family okay i'm not talking about kid flavored lollipops rachel mccroy okay that you thought the kids were being dissolved in the no i thought you were saying dum-dums as people well don't get me wrong don't get me wrong it was the 20s in a factory people were ending up in the lobby like 100 chance like 100 chance there's some like

dude dum-dums out there but 2000 we don't do that we don't fuck with that anymore but we also got really lazy and so it's just like, ugh, what's the point? Just let them mix together. Somebody ate this like, this isn't bad. Can we make this something else and have people talk about it, build brand buzz? That's me. It was me. I was the one who invented it.

That was interesting, baby. Thank you for the facts. Yeah, I'm a big Dumb Dumbs fan. Again, I'm not a real into sugar hard candies in general. I know Griffin loves a good Jolly Rancher. I am not a huge fan. Dumb Dumb, I think, beats Jolly Rancher because a Dumb Dumb, you got options. A Jolly Rancher, you put that in your mouth.

That's it. Until it's done, you either spit it out or you finish it. A Dumb Dumb is like, done, pop. It's still on a stick. Yeah. It's got its own little serving tool there. Let's get some fucking dum-dums tonight. I don't want to.

Can I do one? Yes. This one is, I have written simply, the way Guy on Terrace House waters his succulents one leaf at a time. Oh, God, that scene. Oh, God, that Guy. There's a character on Terrace House season, I guess he comes in about halfway through Aloha Stay.

And again, I don't want to get too deep into it, right? Because I don't want to give any guy-based spoilers. He's my favorite person who's ever been on the show. He's my favorite person who's ever been on my favorite reality television show. He is all-time top contender. He's a surfer boy. He is looking for love in all the right places and you know what he's super rewarding because when you first meet him he's just kind of the

typical surfer stereotype but there's so much depth there he has a childlike sort of uh about all things um he has a lot of really incredible arcs. Here's a slight spoiler for a couple episodes after he joins the show. So if you want to stay pure, just jump ahead. He gets injured while surfing like really big waves on the North Shore. And then he has this whole arc about having to like come back because he has like a Volcom sponsorship and having to like come back and get get brave in the water again. And it's really really

fucking exciting to watch it's like the best it for me that's up there with uh the the beef incident like is it's it's really really good character work on like this really great dude so you're saying you like him more than hansan yeah i like guy more than hansan i like hansan a lot um and hansan i think is sort of a figurehead in my mind um and is don't get me wrong one of the all-time greats but the everything guy has gone through in in this half a season is like fucking stellar stuff and the ultimate just all the cast mates and it's a really really great um slate of cast members right now all of them just sitting around the kitchen table just cackling, laughing as Guy is watering his succulents. And everybody's like, what are you doing?

As he slowly drips one drop of water at a time on each and every leaf of the succulents. I've never, I've never, this is going to sound bad. I've never loved anybody in a moment as much as Guy in that moment. It was so pure and wonderful. I guess our wedding. Okay. The list goes our wedding and then Guy watering the succulents one leaf at a time. All time best shit. God, I love Terrace House.

Agreed. Agreed. That was a really good moment. And Guy is such a special man. He's such a special man. Rachel's looking longingly at the ceiling fan. I think he's, I don't know if I believe in angels, but I believe in Guy. He has kind of a clearance.

It's a wonderful life quality. It's sort of like a clearance. It's a wonderful life quality. And his direct foil in the house is Taishi, who's been there forever, and I genuinely believe is on sort of an Armand trajectory where he will never leave. Only I enjoyed Armand, and I'm starting to enjoy Taishi less and less. But Taishi is very kind of, it seems a little disingenuous, his actions while Guy is just shooting from the hip.

And he doesn't always say the right thing, but you know where that thing came from and it's his hip where he shot from. Yeah. Thank you, Guy. Thank you. Okay. I have another one for you, Griffin. Are you ready? Yeah, please. This one took a lot of research. Oh my you, Guy. Thank you. Okay, I have another one for you, Griffin. Are you ready?

Yeah, please. This one took a lot of research. Oh, my God. Babe, I feel guilty about it. I didn't know that we were sawbones-ing it. I didn't know we were shmanners-ing this one. Well, I don't always trust my memory on things, so that's kind of why I did that. Okay, this probably won't come as a huge surprise to you, but the 1990-91 St. Louis Blues.

Oh, the 1990-91 St. Louis Blues. Oh, the 1990-91 St. Louis Blues? Correct. I mean, I know you're a blues fan, and you know I'm getting there, but I didn't know you had like one year where you were like in it. So you were nine, eight, nine? Eight, nine years old.

Mm-hmm. And I can give you some information. Please do. What was it about this year? Did they win, the big one, the pennant? No, the blues have not won the Stanley Cup cup in my lifetime oh whatever as far as i know i know another one of rachel's favorite things is me taking this fucking jacket off because i'm so sweaty so i yeah i was eight nine years old and this is back when brett hall was playing for the

blues okay i've heard i think i've seen this what do you know about brett hall i've seen him at some of the games and he doesn't have he doesn't look like he's played hockey in the last like 30 years. Did you know anything about him while he was playing? I don't know fuck all about hockey. I know that there's- What do you know about like Wayne Gretzky? Wayne Gretzky was really good.

He played for the Kings, I think, for a bit. For a bit, yeah. He- Also played for the Blues, briefly. Oh, did he? I didn't know that. Uh-huh. Okay.

He played for the Edmonton Oilers. Okay. So he was kind of all over. Mm-hmm over and he was like the best one of the hockey players yes i mean i'm trying to i i don't get it we even called him the great one okay i get no satisfaction from the like little sports ball i get a little bit of satisfaction but i genuinely want to know more about hockey so please tell me about this year that this hockey team did very good and why it brings you so much joy today fucking 25 years later or whatever. Okay. So just for some comparison when you think about Brett Hall. So I

looked this year's highest goal scorer had 44 goals. That seems like a lot. How many games do they play in a season? From what I can tell there's about 80 like somewhere between in a season? From what I can tell, there's about 80. Somewhere between 75 and 85 games, usually.

82. Good call. Can I say something? It's like, well, I run every other game? That's not very good. In the 90-91 season, Brett Hall scored 86 goals. Fuck! That's more than one per game, Brett Hall scored 86 goals.

Fuck! That's more than one per game, Brett. Uh-huh. What was going on? There were 80 games in that season. He scored 86 goals. Is this like an ancient civilizations were smaller than us thing? Like, just like everybody was so little and Brett Hall was like a huge man.

The emphasis used to be on having these big power players yeah and so the rest of your team just all supported that one guy basically that's from what i can tell because it just doesn't exist anymore okay so this guy would you would watch a game and you'd be like i can't wait for when brett hall scores pluckers would like do a fucking get a basket of chicken wings if brett hall scores one and they would go out of business because then he'll score six. So he also that season scored 50 goals in 50 games. Wow. Which used to be a big thing. He is only one of like half a dozen players that have ever done that.

And he's done it multiple times. This 86 goals is the third highest in NHL history behind Wayne Gretzky, who did it twice. He got 92 in one season, 87 in another. Jesus, Wayne. I know. This goal scoring season was the highest in Brett Hull's career. What happened? Like, seriously, did goalies just get, like, fucking good?

How has hockey changed in the last, like, 25 years? It's what I'm telling you. I think the emphasis is more on, team dynamic than a big power player. Spread the goals around. So what you have to keep in mind, Brett Hall scores 86 goals. And then the next highest person's like 12 goals. And they're like, come on, Brett. You know they pay us $100 for each goal we make.

Trying to get a commission, trying to feed my family,tt it's gonna be a slow christmas this year because brett hall took all the fucking goals puck hog is that a thing puck hog no no his dad was a famous hockey player named bobby hall okay uh and he was called the golden jet and Because when he ate spicy food, he turned into a big golden jet. Yeah, of course. I don't actually know. But Brett Hall was called the Golden Brett. That's very good. So one more thing about that team.

So part of the reason Brett Hall scored so many goals is Adam Oates was the center and he assisted Hall on 72 of the 86 goals. Best friends forever? Yeah. Are you kidding me?

You see these two fuckers coming at you like, you may as well just clear the net, because they're going to work together to get the thing in. So I want to show you a picture. Oh, please. So it was Brett Hall and Oates. Oh my God. And so they did a big thing, likelland oats now this is a signed poster is this from your dad showing griffin a picture no my dad actually had they made binders like

trapper keepers to put hockey player cards in hole and my dad has one of those but that i found on ebay but it's a picture of them holding their guitars that I'm sure they play in their ice skates and leather jackets and jerseys. I can't tell you how jealous I am of you for having fucking sports sports idols growing up. I had none. I had a fucking coat that I got at the consignment shop that had like Emmett Smith's name on it. And I was like, I guess Emmett. Who do you like? I guess Emmett. I really don't.

I really don't have anything. You know, I think that. Chris Sabo is the only other sports pole. I don't know who that is. He was on the Reds and he wore glasses. And so he had to wear big goggles over his glasses. His name was Chris Sabo. And we had a toy where he was sliding into the plate. and it looked like he was flying while holding a magic pizza box

that's what that's what these are my sports did you like him because he had glasses like you did he was i didn't have glasses until i was in like high school and this was long after chris sabo had retired i think um he was a third baseman at the hottest, sexiest baseball position. Chris Sabo and his magic pizza had not a big part of my upbringing, sports. So that is the thing. Brett Hall was one of the best players in the league. So living in St. Louis at the time, it became a really big hockey town. Yeah.

So that season, Wayne Gretzky obviously had the most points because he was an incredible player. But right behind him, leading the entire NHL, was Brett Hall and Adam Oates. I love that. So we had like two of the greatest players on one team. Two of the best friends of all time. There was also just one last fact. Jeff Brown, who was a defenseman. And you know defensemen they usually

hang back by the net they're not usually big on the offense yeah uh jeff brown had 47 assists that season okay so like second but yeah oats is my number one best friend but defenseman's like that's not really their goal their goal is to stop people from scoring but he was just a super great you know you get that shit in hall's hands and it's they'll call a penalty because you're not supposed to hold it with your hands they'll make you stop playing they'll send them to the punishment box um so the last fact i'll say is that i think it was a sears in which i waited in line to get a picture of jeff brown signed because he was super dreamy. Oh, I didn't know that the sexuality was a factor. Jeff Brown definitely

was an attractive hockeyman. Wow, interesting. The Blues didn't win the Stanley Cup that season. How did they not with a fucking like power couple? So they played Minnesota who ended up going to the Stanley Cup. Oh, I see. But Minnesota lost to the Pittsburgh Penguins

with Mario Lem lemieux one of the other great players hey babe hey babe yeah well is it right to say can i steal you away because this isn't really a traditional episode i think so okay hey babe can i steal you away it's a remix. It was a remix. Well, typically in remixes, they don't just like cut out the middle of it. Hey, everybody, what Coldplay was the remix to Yellow? We just took out the bridge.

We said, fuck that bridge. Moves too slow. I'm Chris Martin. And it was all yellow. I have a couple Jumbotron messages here. And the first one is for madame commissioner sarah shepherd from rose buddies nyc who says who say it's multiple people definitely it's probably not just one person who's like i'm new york rose buddies no we got a big network no i know we got

a big network what's up y'all i hope you're all hanging out together at the hinterlands probably tell stewart charlotte i said what's up uh drinks are on me they're not on me i have no way i have no way of doing that excuse me just kidding that was a motorcycle i drove by but the joke was that maybe it was a fart what's wrong there's no way the microphone really picks up the motorcycle i'll turn up the game okay to the best bachelor fantasy league commissioner in new york nay the world thanks There's no way. The microphone really picks up the motorcycle. I'll turn up the gain. Oh, okay. To the best Bachelor Fantasy League Commissioner in New York, nay, the world, thanks so much for all you do, from organizing our two leagues worth of teams and keeping us updated on the standings to securing Hinterlands as our official viewing space week after week and always making

sure there are enough chairs. We cannot thank you enough. That last one I feel like was maybe included as an afterthought. Cannot stress enough how important having enough chairs. We cannot thank you enough. That last one, I feel like was maybe included as an afterthought. Cannot stress enough how important having enough chairs are. I didn't add that on my list this week,

but on my list of good goop stuff, always having enough chairs. If we go to a bar and it is standing room only, I walk out of that place so fast. It's walking room only to the exit.

Bye. I came to sit. We went to a restaurant. We just got back from South Padre Island. We went to a restaurant. We just got back from South Padre Island. We went to a restaurant. All the restaurants on there are kind of a shit show just because like it's not there's not many of them.

And so there's like two good ones. And there's only like two good ones also. And we went to one of those two good ones and we went to this bar space and there was a table with four chairs. There's six of us. And it was just like, now we're going to have to fucking form a committee. chairs and there's six of us and it was just like now we're gonna have to fucking form a committee we're gonna have to evaluate each other's like posture and standing health wrestle and then we luckily got another table two more chairs and finally everybody had enough chairs i never felt

so relieved in my life a very good story that i feel great about telling. I have another message here, and this one's for Cody. Can you read it? Yes. It's just the computer's so heavy, and I'm so weak from the disease. Don't catch my disease from touching my laptop. This message is for Cody. It is from Allie. Happy birthday, Cody.

Thank you for constantly serving looks, reminding me to check my ego at the door, and podcasting with me every week about the trashy world of Twilight. Here's to your next year of zagging on them. So important that you check your ego at the door, especially when you're walking into a podcast studio. I have to remind myself to do that.

I got a little sign hanging over the door that says, Hey, Griffin, check that. You don't. You never have an ego, Griffin. That's one of the nice things about you. That's true. Twilight podcast, I bet, is good. Do you think there's much going on in that realm these days? I figure it's probably done, right?

I mean, this is not to judge a podcast about. It's just like, you know, the Potterverse, fucking J.K. Rowling's always up in the set. Like, you know. Saying she's finished, but then finished but then bringing out but then she brings back one more here's some sort of mixed media experiment i don't know are they doing that with twilight well i know twilight was really formative for a lot of people that is true i think i kind of missed that boat but i know a lot of people who feel very strongly about edward versus jeremy jeremy jeremy jeremy the about Edward versus... Jeremy. Jeremy. Jeremy.

Jeremy the wereboy. Edward versus... Jameson. I'm Jameson the wereboy, and I'm going to kiss you on your vampire wounds. I really can't. Yes, okay. I'll look it up for you. Edward is one of them.

Edward's one of them. And if you're not Team Edward, you're Team... It says here Gumbel. Gumbel the wereboy. So I was wrong before. It's Gumbel. No, Griffin.

What is it? Kevin. Well, hoopity-dop-dop-a-scoopity-dee-dop. Dee-dee-da-ba-dee-do-ba-dee-da-ba-dee-hoop. Hoop-a-doo-doo-doo-da-pa-ba-dee-dee-dee-da-ba-dee-da-ba-da. Stop podcasting yourself. We don't even know anymore. it on maximumfund.org or wherever you download your podcasts hey i have one on my list here speaking of uh south padre island the beach the beach place the texas beach place like the only one okay i have written down here bud light

lime and then i have next to that i have written the ocean potion oh that's nice and then next to that i have fuck lime marita all of these are all really important to understand bud light lime is a see i feel like you should have research on this prepared what's i i did can i tell you something i googled bud light lime to find out what i could learn and it's like 110 calories in a 12 ounce can which is not bad i want to know when it came on the scene i'm in 2000s okay bun light lime is uh bud light but it has lime flavors mixed into it. And notice how I said lime flavors there and not lime juice. It is created not in a sort of monastic tradition, but rather the same way that I'm pretty sure Lucky Charms marshmallows are sort of synthesized.

It is... It's lime adjacent. We bought a lot of them for the house that we stayed at in South Padre Island with our friends, and we'd fill a cooler up and go to the beach, and I would drink this delicious sea potion right there by the waves, and just, you know, I could pound six, seven, eight, nine, ten of them on a good beach day, sitting out there, sand in my toes, surfing my ears, crabs crawling all over my feet, little kids playing around,

making little castles, ocean up my nose, doing a line of Mother Gaia's water. And then we would go home, and we would have some in the fridge, and we'd be making dinner, and it would be like, do you want a Bud Light lime? And my answer would be, of course.

Fuck no. That was a confusing sentence. And we've got to be in or around a body of water. If I'm in a swimming pool, and I'm hanging out with my friends, and it's 98 degrees outside, and we're listening to 98 degrees on the radio. Yes, of course. True to your heart. Come on, being true to your...

Sinus infection. Still fucking got it and my friends throw two bud light limes one for me one of my friend i'll jump up in the air and i'll grab both of them and i'll drink them but real fast like steve austin catching a frisbee and i'll pierce it with my teeth and i'll eat the can because that's a fucking what you're dealing with right there is a summer potion and i want to be a part of it but then 60 seconds later if i have to get up and go to the bathroom outside of the pool because i'm not a wild dog and then somebody i go inside and my friends are having some chips and dip and they say do you want to drink with the chips and dips we have bud light lime i would say go to hell

yeah agreed because you know why well you why? Because it's not a good beer. It's not a beer you want with dinner. It's not. It's certainly not a dinner beer. Which I think says something about its quality. Unless you're doing a fucking roast out on the beach and you got some rich citrus flavors. You have to be water adjacent. There's something to that. I have several theories.

One, I think it's partially made of ocean water. I think there's definitely... I'm not saying standard Bud Light is so great. In fact, I'll say this on the air. I never want to drink Bud Light. If I gave you a can of Bud Light and an entire

lime, do you think you could recreate the magic? That is the most foolish thing I've ever heard anyone say in my life. Why would I want to is my response to that. There's no reason why I would want to do that. Because here's the thing, and I know I'm going to get lots of tweets from people just like- It might save you a few cents to do it that way. There are lots of lagers, particularly Mexican lagers, that I'll put a slice of lime inside

and enjoy those on the beach. Yeah, Tecate. Tecate, yes. I feel like that is the sort of Texas one, right? Or Dos Equis. So if I'm going to cook something... You're going to cook. Yeah, okay.

I see, I see. Bud Light's never going to enter the equation. But Bud Light Lime is not Bud Light with lime juice in it. It's Bud Light with weird brackish lime water. I bet if you took a Bud Light and a lime popsicle, you'd get close. I think you'd definitely get closer than you would with a traditional lime from a tree or whatever. I love these in the water and I get a lot of judgment from my friends. Like we go to the, we went to the trip and the first day they were like,

let's go grocery shopping. What beers do you want? My answer is always going to be Bud Light Lime to that. Cause I know like, it's going to be fun to have these little nasty creeps in the water with me. Now here's the other thing that you haven't mentioned. Although it makes sense when we talk about water adjacent, I would say that you only have these, although it makes sense when we talk about water adjacent.

I would say that you only have these from May to September. Oh, yeah. I'm not going to be fucking sitting in front of the Christmas fireplace with my family drinking a Bud Light lime, because first of all, not in water, obviously. Second of all, no, that's not the time. It's not the time, it's not the place, and it's not the beer i have another theory and this one light by the way is an anhyzer bush are not a sponsor on this program no griffin just genuinely loves no there's certainly not going to be after this next sentence because i do think there's something

about bud light line that makes it easier to turn into piss in my body and i've had kidney stones before and so i do that shit's always on the periphery of my decision making and so i'm thinking like how easy it gonna be to convert this you know and the answer for bud light lime is i think it's pretty good i'm not saying it's made of piss because that's a really cruel thing to say about a beverage that i'm sure people work very hard on that's not what we're doing here today no this is a positive place i'm here to say this nasty beer tastes so good when i'm swimming the ocean potion a but and i do i do want to tag this on the end here limerita you flew too close to the sun no apple apple rita peach rita why did you know gross i've never once in my life drank thank you bud light lime and like, what if this but sweeter? No, it's already good.

It's already good. Agreed. It's already a light sherbet. I definitely don't need more in there. Can I give you something I love? I want that. Yes, I want it. The 1990 film Dick Tracy.

A lot of early 90s stuff in this episode. Well, I had a very positive childhood in a lot of ways okay what was so good about dick tracy the 90 movie okay dick tracy for some reason people don't really like that movie or critically it did not do i don't remember liking it very much but i was three so uh directed and produced by warren baity who also was dick tracy so maybe that's part of it come on Maybe you leaned a little too hard. All right. You know who else is in that movie?

Madonna, I believe. Yes, Madonna. And I love the soundtrack to that movie, by the way. Okay. Real good. What was it? I'm a huge Madonna fan. Oh, it was all Madonna music?

Well, there were like three soundtracks released because there was the Madonna part. Okay. And then there were like the other part of the soundtrack that had like Katie Lang and Erasure. Can I be real with you? Yeah. I've never seen this movie. Never seen the film, Dick Tracy.

Oh, well, you said you didn't like it. Yeah, I don't know why I said that. I may have been thinking of like Cool World. I was definitely thinking of Cool World, yeah. Who else is in it? Al Pacino. He plays No Face? No, he plays Big Boy.

Some cool names in this movie. We also have Dick Van Dyke is the district attorney. We have Kathy Bates as a sonographer. We have Dustin Hoffman as Mumbles. What's up with this cast, though? Fuck. I know, right? Mandy Patinkin is in it.

What? As the piano player. Why have I not seen this film? It's incredible. James Caan is in it. What? As the piano player. Why have I not seen this film? It's incredible. James Caan is in it. Catherine O'Hara. Oh, my God. It's a really good cast. And I just really liked it as a kid. Break it down for me. Do you remember what happens in it? Can you give me like anything? like this um orphan and the kid is played by the same guy that's in can't hardly wait the the the kind of the geek that becomes the star of the party okay he's also in hook you know i'm talking

about that actor yeah the kid who plays the baseball son in hook yes the baseball son in hook baseball son baseball son baseball son well you just look up son in hook. Baseball son, baseball son, baseball son. You just look up son and hook. It doesn't have to be the baseball son. Charlie. Charlie Korsmo.

Yes. Okay. So he adopts the boy and the boy becomes a crime fighter. I'm guessing. Something like that. And there's a bunch of mobsters. And the mobsters have fun names, right?

Like no knuckles and fat hog and Tough Feet and Stink Tongue. Shit Nose. Sewing Callous. Sewing Callous. Well, yeah. This doesn't really follow the same convention as the ones that I was producing, but I like Sewing Callous. Tennis Elbow. What is it that you like about Dick Tracy's? Has dick in the title and that's very obviously very funny i would i

mean that would probably be reason number 11 i guess that low down on the list i find that very hard to believe what what's so what makes you think of it what makes you think like i want to talk about this on this podcast artistically it's really cool like there's a bunch of like like every like kind of color and costume is chosen very deliberately to seem kind of comic booky okay you know i'm not a huge comic book fan but i just visually i remember really liking it uh music as i mentioned is good um and i don't know there's really good performances in it al pacino is incredible i guess i'm just confused as to like, I'm talking about

Bud Light Lime because I drank approximately 100 of them during this past weekend. But when you sat down to like really think of what to do, you know, I didn't ask you the same line of questions when you talked about mystery flavored dum-dums, so maybe I should lay off. Well, so I guess because like movies that I liked growing up are like Labyrinth,

Princess Bride. Those are pretty common favorites for people my age. You hear a lot of people say like, oh, I watched Princess Bride hundreds of times. Like, yeah, me too. Dick Tracy, a bit of a deeper cut. Yeah, but you know what you didn't watch? What's that? Dick Tracy.

Can I do one more? Yes, please. I have a lot of ones on here. Crab Legs. But I feel like my reasons for liking Crab Legs are much like my reasons for liking Bud Light Lime. Except the crab legs are amazing. But it's really a beach time thing. So you really based yours on this past weekend.

Yeah, and it's what's hot right now. Okay. When a big dog and a small dog stand nearby one another. That was big for me this weekend on a beach. We saw that big Great Dane and we saw a little Chihuahua with it. And it's like, y'all are the same animal? Yeah. That's wonderful for me i said a hat on a baby because we put a hat on our baby and it's just like good are you kidding me with this stuff

um that's good but a baby will wear a hat a lot of babies will not tolerate a hat but henry gets it no he understands what we're doing uh i want to talk about games done quick which we've been we literally just watched henry woke up um uh in the middle of this recording, and so we went and let him fall back asleep, and we watched some- You may notice when it happens. Yeah. So there's a speedrunning community that gets together twice a year. In January, they do awesome Games Done Quick, and then in July, they do summer Games Done Quick, so they do every six months. quick and then in july they do summer games done quick so they do every six months uh and they all get together for about five or six days and for 24 hours a day they stream these speed run attempts

for all these different games raising money from uh viewers for charity um right now they're raising money for doctors without borders they used to do for i think like the uh american cancer foundation that is not the name of the group society the prevent and prevent cancer foundation uh is what it was uh and they usually bring in like a couple million dollars so like it's to me that part is really cool um and i've liked it for a couple years now i think game speed running is like really fascinating because there's um there's so many different ways of doing it based on like what the faults are in each individual game um like to me that there are entire communities of people dedicated to figuring out where the exploitable rough edges in the super nintendo

version of the mask video game adaptation of the movie, that there's like 30 people all just like cracking away. I referenced that, but they actually did that game like a couple years ago and showed off like they have fucked this game completely up. Like you can start the levels and like walk backwards and instantly finish them. And they Skyped in like an old like programmer on that game who the whole time was just like, oh no, what have you done to my baby?

I find it really interesting that there are people who are like not only like preserving the past in this way, but like having to like dig into what it was like when they were making these things and then figure out how to work that into a strategy that shaves like a second or two off of the top speed run time see if i were to sit down and watch this a lot of it would be nostalgia like i mentioned to you like when i was a kid i was really big on sonic games yeah fun for

me to watch somebody play them i mean that's every year they do like a whole sonic block where they have just like because that because that game is all about going very fast and so it makes sense that there's a huge community of people for every sonic game where they're just like year after year you watch these streams and there's new stuff there's new strategies they figured out there's new weaknesses to exploit and new like bugs to go after but you're saying what you like about it isn't necessarily nostalgia it is partially nostalgia like i enjoy um like the runs i enjoy best are the ones where they take games that like i spent hundreds of hours playing when i was a little kid and now they're like yeah we can beat in 45 seconds fuck you like i think that there's something really really entertaining about that um so awesome game son quick happened in january

and that was when henry our baby um just wasn't sleeping he was sleeping in about 45 minute increments and then there was about an hour and a half to two hours every night where he would just be up and I would start taking him into the living room so that you could get a little bit of sleep because you're breastfeeding. And so like you would have to get up with him. And I would watch for a week. I watched AGDQ. I watched Awesome Games Done Quick.

And because it streams for 24 hours, like I feel like I really enjoyed it before that, but it's always going to have like a really special place in my heart because of, like, here's instant entertainment around the clock for a whole week. Like, no matter what, it is cool to know I can turn on the TV and see some people who have worked really, really, really hard to master this thing that they are one of 20 people on earth even like attempt to do like to me i think that's really interesting um and i have so much like respect for how much work goes into it because me and nick did a video where i tried to speed run gone home which is not a game that you should like speed run but like even that goofy joke video like i had to work for a really long time to figure out um how to how to do it me and Me and Clint Wilson used to play Ocarina of Time and see how fast we could beat it. I remember you told me that.

And we never went online to look up the hot strategies or whatever, but we did it dozens of times until we got it down to about a tight five hours or so. Yeah, I think it's a really fascinating world, and the amount of work that goes into it is kind of staggering and just the amount of um just i find it i find it refreshing thinking about the number of people who are putting so much time and energy into such such such specific things and that those people have like this week where they are like fucking stars and like people i've watched enough of these now where like i recognize runners and i'm like oh wow they picked up half-life huh it's like the olympics it kind of is yeah describing like because that's one thing i like about the olympics is that

while the olympics is happening it's almost always on tv yeah you know you're seeing people that have spent their whole four years or whole life training for this moment. And you're getting to see like a very specialized skill that almost nobody in the world has. And like, it's like all that you see on display for a whole week is all of these people like showing what they've learned in the last year. Like, I think it's, you're not like a huge like video game person, but do you find the streams like entertaining enough? No, when you have it on. I mean, I would love to watch it for a game that I was familiar with because that has not happened yet.

Yeah. But I think it's interesting to watch. How do people, if people to watch um how do people if people are interested how do they do it yeah so it's running uh the rest of this week um you can go to uh i don't actually know if you just look up summer games done quick you'll get the website i'm sure if you go to sgdq.com you can probably find it but i think it runs till friday um we have an app right on our yeah it's on twitch uh which is how we're watching it um but yeah i fucking love it i watch it every every i watch it twice a year for like two weeks a year like i just

watch people do speed runs of video games and like i fucking look forward to it and while we're at the beach when i'd be like inside cooling off uh you know just trying to sweat off some of those bud light limes i would like come in and watch speed runs. I feel bad because all of your things that you love happened this weekend, and mine happened like 20 years ago. Like in the early 90s? Well, I like that. It's like a mix. It's like a time mix.

We've got to stop doing this podcast. I'm about to fall the fuck over dead. Poor Griffin. Also, I'm pretty sure my coughing woke up the baby earlier, and I feel really guilty about that. That may not be true. He is also sick, ladies and sick ladies and gentlemen that is true god it's a nightmare i am the only standing well for how long yeah who knows uh thanks for listening to rose buddies that was our recap of the bachelor this week um yeah stay tuned next week we're gonna get into what final

six yeah and then more shit will happen on the show and then we'll talk about that and so um anything else that we like need to talk about you know what i will say um if you enjoyed this episode and you have friends that don't listen because they don't watch the bachelor bachelorette maybe you recommend this one yeah sure give them this one episode what do you think of this cool couple talking about 1990s saint louis blues and the video game speed running community and mystery dum-dums um yeah this might be a weird way to back people into the rose buddies experience uh thank you for listening sorry again for how i sound thanks to maximum fun for having us and good maximum fun i'm not crying go to maximum fun.org check out all the great podcasts there you

can see all our shows at mackroy shows.com and uh happy happy fourth of july welcome to our earth and thank you for listening see you later i'm until next time i'm griffin mackroy i'm rachel mackroy when you're ready final rose stay with us on this journey of joy spoiler alert she is up with soldier boy alert. She is up with Soulja Boy. Right reasons. Right reasons. Take me to all four seasons. Gage McFadden, Marina Sirtis, Lursa and Batur,

LeVar Burton, Patrick Stewart look like movie stars. Yeah. Everybody else is like you should just be on TV. Sort of like when podcasters do this live Ben the Greatest Generation is going back out on tour we're taking a new show out on tour about Star Trek First Contact

and whether or not you're a Star Trek fan I think you're going to love this live show you come to our live show you get Star Trek jokes you I think you're going to love this live show. You come to our live show, you get Star Trek jokes. You get fart jokes. The whole gamut. So come on out.

It's bit.ly slash ggtour2017. That's bit.ly slash ggtour2017.