Wonderful! - Wonderful! 105: The Coaster of the Future

Episode Date: October 23, 2019

Griffin's favorite school event! Rachel's favorite college rock band! Griffin's favorite winter wear! Rachel's favorite record keepers! Music: "Money Won't Pay" by bo en and Augustus - https://open.spotify.com/album/7n6zRzTrGPIHt0kRvmWoya MaxFunDrive ends on March 29, 2024! Support our show now by becoming a member at maximumfun.org/join.

🎵 Hi, this is Rachel McElroy. Hello, this is Griffin McElroy. And this is Wonderful. Well, time to make the donuts. That's the flour. Okay, keep going. Eggs.

Slip, slip. Butter. Can I ask you something? Mix it all up. Before we continue. Sugar. Vanilla. What's up?

This time to make the donuts thing that you say is in reference to a commercial, correct? Yeah. From what, like 1989 or something? You know, once a commercial is out, it's kind of always, if you think about it. You know what I mean? Because I can watch it whenever. So like, who gives a shit when it's born?

I think our audience tends to skew younger. Oh, I see. And I get nervous they don't appreciate your witticisms. Okay, well, okay, so to back it up, this is a wonderful show. We talk about good things Donuts being one of them And there was a commercial Where somebody was like

Time to make the donuts And then they fell into A big fryer And tied For a long time y'all And it was on the Super Bowl So everyone had to see it And it was live and real

Happy Halloween I could eat a donut Right now though Could you Aren't you full from our Our dinner And real. Happy Halloween. I could eat a donut right now, though. Could you? Aren't you full from our dinner, our standard Tuesday dinner? Well, there's always room for donuts. And I think that was another commercial. That one had Bart Simpson on it.

And he said, don't eat my donuts, dude. Hey, do you have any small wonders? Yes. Okay. Hey, do you have any small wonders? Yes. Okay. My small wonder is having you return. Yes. It is kind of a slog to caretake a young child by yourself, as many of you may know.

And when Griffin returns, I feel a tremendous amount of relief and happiness. Yeah. That is my small wonder. Mine is being away, getting drinks with the boys, partying, watching late-night arena football games. Literally going to a bar and doing karaoke. Oh, yeah, we did do that once. It was a fun time, but that was just the once, and the rest of the time was work sweating sweating back-breaking

work the good news though is that i caught up on this is us oh so america can finally rest easy yes um i'm at my actual small wonder i'm gonna say is youtube tutorials i've been learning about uh different music software and like how all that stuff works. And it's cool to be like, ah, there's this huge imposing piece of software that I have to learn how to use. I don't know how to even start. And then it's like, oh,

just literally search anything in YouTube, how to do it. And you can find out how to do it. Y'all are the folks that do YouTube tutorials better than the folks that do travel videos on YouTube. Oh yeah. Yeah. Cause they don't want,

yeah, there there's very little charisma required in a, you know, here's how to use Ableton Live 10 as opposed to like, hey, I'm going to go to this country and embarrass myself. So who goes first this week? I believe it's you. I believe it might be me as well. I got two little ones this week.

I felt inspired to talk about these two things. And then I realized there's not a lot of meat on these bones. But my first thing is picture day. I love picture day. Today was Henry's picture day. And at his daycare, that was a quick turnaround, first of all. Yeah. So the company that came to do this is the company that I think did my pictures like, you know, 20 years ago.

I think it's just the one company. Yeah. And it's called life touch yeah when i saw that name i just thought oh my gosh they're still doing it took me on a journey yeah they had the pictures like the proofs ready to go this afternoon when we picked them up i feel like i had to wait back in my day 90s kids remember this was you had to like you would wait like a full six week period and then you would get them all in and like you get them passed out in the homeroom yeah you get the physical ones and you could like show them to people like

trading cards like there was so much anticipation cut them out right on the back i love picture day for so many reasons i like it now as a parent because dropping off henry today in his cute little sweater seeing all of his like little friends like a little bit more dressed up than usual and seeing them like have the little background set up with like little little pumpkin props they did yeah they were like in the process of setting it up and all the kids were so excited they actually yesterday sent home Henry with a sticker on his back that said hey tomorrow's picture day a literal sticker that LifeTouch sent out like that's a dope marketing scheme um but i yeah i also really liked it as a kid and i was trying to think about why i think i could sort of do a whole segment on like a broader category of

just school interruptions like activities that you know are going to just um at my high school like i was sort of tangentially involved in the high school theater program which is to say i took theater class like every semester but almost never did any of the plays but whenever there was a play and they were like ready to put it on you could just go see it like during a school showing and then that's like a huge interruption isn't it that's like a huge difference because school like regardless of how you feel about it i was kind of neutral on it is is very monotonous in the sense that like it's the same thing kind of every day and so any sort of twist on that is so exciting point because i always thought of it from the perspective of oh

the people that had to come to this must be so annoyed. Like when I was in band and they would invite the school to watch us perform. It was always super embarrassing as a member of the band. Yeah. I was like, everybody hates being here, but you're saying they're just glad not to be in class. It was awesome. Yeah.

Whenever there would be some dude who, there was a dude who came and played volleyball so good to teach us all not to do drugs. This is like the kind of thing I feel like me and Justin and Travis reference this a lot about like, I'm going to tear a phone book in half so you'll stop using meth or whatever. Like that was a real thing that people would like come to our school and do. That happened at our school too, but I was absent that day and all I heard about for like the next month was that performance.

We got a couple of them and it was always like, you want to do what now? Yeah, we're going to, I know you're excited to learn about social studies, but we're going to take you in the gymnasium for this period and you're going to watch a guy do volleyball tricks. And it's like, okay, are you sure? It doesn't seem strictly educational, but if you say so, let's get wild. When you say volleyball tricks, I'm not sure. Because volleyball inherently requires multiple people to play. So what was this man doing? He could just like hit a shot from super far away. Like he'd set like a, you know, a bucket down.

So they would set up the net and it would just be him out there on the course? Well, and then he played three people at a time and like totally beat the shit out of them. It was pretty radical. And as a result, I made the decision to stay drug free that day. Except for weed. He actually said that. He was like, weed's fine, by the way. Spike it.

And spike the crystal and all that stuff. Anyway, Picature Day, though, is its own sort of kettle of fish, because while it is an exciting interruption, it's like a weird thing, especially when I was like a little, little kid. Who are these strangers in the lunchroom? What is that big sheet of paper covered in fucking lasers? Hello. That's pretty rad. Can I ask how you felt about your picture day game? So I was and.

Arguably the cutest McElroy of the three. Wait for the twist though. Okay. I was, yes, I was the cutest McElroy youngoy of the three wait for the twist though okay i was yes i was the cutest mackleroy youngster of the three but i also had the longest spell after that of just complete unphotogenic like just a disaster boy i'm saying like i was incapable of taking a photo that i felt like okay about so that was quite a quite a quite a bad dry spell so those first few years like i got more excited about it in high school it was strictly like you want to do what now you

take pictures okay yeah smile i forgot how yeah yeah like this um but you know those those backdrops are dope you did have the lasers you did have we have the paint splotches that was big did a lot of sitting with one knee up on like a step ladder or whatever we didn't do that ours were always like waist up oh interesting we had props i had i held a basketball in one picture like in middle school like who the fuck are you kidding i had one i don't know where to find this picture, but I was like in a full blown like denim tuxedo holding a basketball with my knee up on a stepladder. Can I ask you, do you consciously remember

your mom dressing you for these things or do you? Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I mean, I don't consciously remember it, but I do know that that is what happened because if she didn't, like I would have worn my like, you know, usual outfit of big cargo shorts with like, oh, even worse, dude, like a secret of mana SNES game promotional T-shirt I got from Babbage's that was like an XL, like too big for my small, you 80 pound elementary school frame uh anyway i just think i just think it's exciting for for like to get the day where you get the pictures back this was huge for senior photos too like senior photos while i did not feel especially comfortable about mine like i got really into the trading card game of it yeah because it was the assortment

because i remember and this is probably a big marketing technique of the senior pictures but there was a suggestion that you get multiple looks and locations oh yeah so everybody had like the hand on the on the face and then the standing in front of something and you know and then maybe like a sassy sitting pose and you would get all three and then you would kind of see which pose, and you would get all three, and then you would kind of see which ones were most popular with your friends and what they would take.

I think I only had one because my senior photos were a fucking trip, man. It was rough. I mean, this was in pure thick hair, Griffin McElroy. For those who don't know, I did not get a haircut for, I't know man a decade and a half long ass time i just got it thinned out over and over and over and over and over again until i formed this like impenetrable sort of dome of just hair and it was unsightly poofy it was so so poofy and

yeah this was like i think in one of them i I was one of them. Okay. During also, I actually hated this. I hated taking senior photos because it was like, what do you like? And it's like, I don't know. I'm into Ben Folds. I like Ben Folds and I play the piano. And I forget what like my other thing was, but they're like, all right, we're going to take a picture of you. You're wearing your Ben Folds t-shirt.

We've got this tiny toy piano. You're going to hold it out in this hand. And in this one, you're going to hold like a, like a, you know, a PlayStation controller or something like that. Oh my gosh, Griffin. So that's, you want to capture my essence like that? That's fine. I got away fairly easy because I definitely saw pics of Justin and Travis, like with the

comedy tragedy drama masks. And I was like, no, they're but for the grace of God go I. So yeah, that wasn't great. But taking pictures at school. Love that. Club grace of God go I. So yeah, that wasn't great. But taking pictures of school. Love that. Club photos. I love it. If you're in a lot of clubs, it's like, I'm not learning anything today. See ya. Yeah. It's like the Met Gala for school. And it's real cute when the subjects are two and three years old. Holy shit. I remember, I think it was middle school was the first year where they would let you pick a color

that would be behind you. And I remember very thoughtfully picking a color that would go with the sweater that I knew I was gonna wear. Ooh, God. Like this was the level I was bringing to it. How long have you been a fashion icon? Has it been since birth?

Oh, I mean, yes. Okay. Yes, I've always had very strong opinions about what i was wearing yeah um there is tell us tell us about your look right now describe your look right now um well i'm wearing sponsored lounge pants and sponsored socks jesus christ and sponsored socks and um a pink hooded sweatshirt I've had for about nine years. It's true. Yeah.

I think you had that before I knew you. And a shirt, a tank that I got while I was pregnant with Henry. Okay. It's fresh. It's fresh as hell. So here we go. You got the basic robin's egg blue, green gingham checker pattern, pink hoodie over a gray stretchy tank top.'s the that's that's

and that's the look for summer 2020 yeah what's your first thing my first thing is oh i'm sorry i just watched you put a soda on the screen of your iphone as if it was like steve jobs's future coaster i just watched that happen and you didn't even make a big deal out of it. Do you want me to not do that? It's fine, but you like picked up your can of beverage to get it out of the way of your notes

and you just put it very, there's other places you could put it and you just very casually put it on the screen of your iPhone. It's the wildest thing I've ever seen. Do you want me to move it? Let's say no and I'll see if I can pay

attention to anything else. My first thing is the album, Is This It? by The Strokes that came out in 2001. You are always talking about this album and the songs upon it. Yes. Yeah. I, it was kind of the timing for, for a few reasons. First of all, I was brand new in college, right? And so all of college was kind of going to parties and seeing what people were playing.

Right. You know, the other thing was the timing of this album made it so like exciting and different than anything else. So I was doing a little research. Cause I remember when this, this album came out by the strokes. Would you say 2001?

Yeah. Okay. And I was thinking like, this doesn't sound like anything that's happening right now. And so I went online to look and see what was popular in 2000. And it was like Christina Aguilera, Savage Garden, Jessica Simpson.

This was when Eiffel 65 came out with Blue. Sure. A lot of like really poppy music, you know, that was very kind of radio homogenous, I guess. Right. I don't know. Were the strokes on the radio, is that the comparison? Because there was definitely, you know, underground alternative music. No, I'm just saying like the biggest, most popular stuff that you, like I was hearing at parties didn't sound anything like this.

Right. And then I heard The Strokes and I was like, oh my gosh, it was the first time in a while, probably the first time since I heard Weezer that I remember thinking like, oh, who is this band? I want to know everything about them as soon as I heard it. So The Strokes released this album. i heard it um so the strokes released this album there was their debut album um and it made a whole bunch of like lists like rolling stones um it was number two on rolling stones 100 best albums of the 2000s holy shit number one was kid a oh okay you know understandably well except it's okay

when did okay Computer come out? Was that in the 90s? No, see, you're one of those. Okay. Well, people... It was a better album. People have very strong opinions about... I didn't know that.

...Radiohead albums. Okay. And a lot of people are like either Okay Computer or Kid A. Okay Computer is so good. Okay. Mm-hmm. Computer. And the story of the band is kind of interesting so they're a lot like more fancy

pants than i think i realized i know nothing about they come across as real grungy like they it was kind of what i saw online was that they kind of ushered in what they called the garage rock revival of this like idea of like rock and roll as like it was popularized you know decades ago uh but so these guys in the band um were at like fancy schools in new york and then one of them went to boarding school in switzerland and met another of the members in switzerland and then they came back to new york and went to the tish school of the arts uh so they're like all like classically trained like super fancy individuals i was gonna say so they vampire weekended it but i think vampire weekend strokes did i guess yeah exactly

well and that's the thing about the strokes is that after the strokes that's when bands like the killers and arctic monkeys and jet and franz ferdinand like all these bands rose up like oh can we do rock and roll again great that's interesting i never thought of them being sort of the progenitors of that whole sort of every sort of college band that was big when i that's one of the funny things about our our age difference is like you were you were into the the og shit yeah you know i have the the carbon copies so i wanted to play two songs and before i continue i wanted to play um the song hard to explain um this is one of like kind of the first songs that really hooked me off the album and gives you kind of a sense of kind of what the strokes are all about. Are you going to play Last Night?

No. Was that on this album? Yes. Oh, okay. Yes. I assume everybody knows Last Night, which might not be true. I was recently informed that our audience skews young, and so they may not know about the donuts commercial,

and they may not know about the donuts commercial, and they may not know about last night. I was not super familiar with it until it showed up on a rock band, which is true of most music. So this album was released in the UK first, and it featured a black and white photo of a gloved hand on a woman's naked backside. What? Very scandalous. Her fanny?

Yes. So this is October 2001. And so that was part of the reason the album was released late. The other was that they had a song called New York City Cops that was a little critical of police exactly a month after September 11th. So there was kind of a delay on the album release here as compared to the UK. But yeah, then it was named Best Album of the Year by Entertainment Weekly and Time Magazine.

It kind of blew up Pitchfork, gave it a 9.1, which is uncommon for Pitchfork, because it's poor so well. And here's what they said in the review that I thought was really apt. They said, The strokes have struck an incredible balance between the two extremes of rock music,

sentimentality, and listlessness. Any sentimentality in these songs' lyrics is countered by Casablancas, who's the lead singer in the band. Self-reliant indifference and his listless delivery is offset by the band's fervid attack. Yeah. I like that a lot. There's this kind of like,

like drowsiness to it. This kind of like, um, I don't know, just this kind of rock and roll like energy. Like they cite the velvet underground is kind of one of their big influences and you can really kind of hear that so the other song i wanted to play uh is the modern age um which is another really good song off the album that you may know for Yeah, so I, Strokes is one of those bands, I just listened to the whole album again today, just to kind of remind myself that I still liked it.

Every single song on there is great. I used to go, there were these guys that we were friends with and they would have house parties because they lived kind of on the street in our college town where everybody had house parties and they would just play this album every single time, front to back, every time they had people over. And I just always loved it. That's great. I was just obsessed with it.

It was great. Can I steal you away? Yes. Can I sing Last Night to get us us there because i've run out of good ideas of how to edit the home improvement song okay it's something like in case you haven't heard it i did want people to know it's like last night she said let's get with my i can't make no no. They don't understand. There it is. That's basically how it goes in case you didn't know.

Can I read you a personal message? Yes, you can. This message is for Julia Small Crimes Gaskell. It is from George Coolstanza. The Portland Mabim Band never got released, so I paid $100 to tell everyone the cool nickname the brothers gave me, but also to tell you I love you. I think we'd be best friends no matter what.

You make the best cheesecake, and you make a lot of dogs happy. That is a sweet message, and I don't even remember what the show is. George Coolstanza is really good. George Coolstanza is very powerful. You don't think that was you? God, I don't know.

Do you think it's got Travis energy? It has big Travis energy, if I were to guess. Here is a message for Josh, and it's from Lauren, who says, I found out I got a Jumbotron today while we were buying corn dogs and 40s of high life in shoppers, and I got so excited that I spilled the beans. Now we get to be excited about this together. Josh, you are my best friend, the kindest person I know, and the greatest mouse dad ever. Thanks for being there for me always. I don't know why I skipped the always in there. Thanks for conditionally being there for me.

It's kind of a fun reveal. Thanks for being there for me always. I love you forever, Lauren. And this is so great. They say, what's your preferred time frame? And Lauren said, whenever is okay. I'm flexible. That's so nice. That is really nice. Whenever Josh needs to hear it, Lauren's going to be here to slap those beans out of

her hand, I think. I may have misread the whole thing. Have you ever bought corndogs at the grocery store? Where else am I going to get them? I don't know that I've ever bought a a frozen corn dog that I have heated at home. I'm not a huge corn dog fan. Yeah, I guess not. But like, so for example, I've bought a frozen soft pretzel hundreds of times.

Never a corn dog though. I wonder what's that cooking process like? Do you know? I don't know. I'm having a little bit of trouble picking up on the microphone because you're shouting down to me from the deck of your super yacht. And these corn dogs. Now, how does one eat them?

Are they ears of corn with dog ears on them? Do you pay someone to eat it for you as you watch? Sure. Hello, my name is Tusk Henderson and I am an outdoorsman. Are you looking for a new comedy podcast? This month's episode of Beef and Dairy Network Podcast has as its guest the wonderful Nick Offerman

playing the part of Tusk Henderson, adventurer and outdoorsman. Think about fitting yourself a month's worth of provisions and a half-ton cow into a kayak. So if you've never listened to the show before, this might be a good place to start. I string a bowstring between her horn tips and I can fire a spear off the top of her head and took in some very delicious cod. So if you're after a new comedy podcast, why not try the Beef and Dairy Network from Maximum Fun? Download it now.

You flip a cow upside down, they make an excellent toboggan. Can I do my second thing? Yes. Again, little, little bits, but bits that are important to me. Okay. Bits that are so powerful. That's what this show's all about, babe. Pea coat.

Yes. Get yourself a freaking peacoat my god i love a peacoat i love the one week you brought a light jacket this is different oh my god this is so different though this is so different heavy jacket i have been wearing not just any heavy jacket a pea coat a pea coat i've owned peacoats as like my winter like coat solution since I was in like high school. I've always had a peacoat on me. I remember when peacoats became a thing and I had to get one right away. You had to.

It is, I'm not a very fashionable person, but when I put on a peacoat, I feel like I'm about to go to the opera. I love a peacoat. It looks so, so good. It looks good on anyone. I've never seen anyone wear a peacoat. It's true good on anyone i've never seen anyone wear a peacoat it's true seriously i've never seen anyone wear a peacoat where i didn't say like that looks great on you it's true uh i haven't i haven't even seen that many bad peak like it's hard to fuck a peacoat up no it all looks really really good and i just always got to get one i have i uh i actually

didn't have one for a little bit and on this year we were in tour in new orleans and it was unseasonably cold and i bought a peacoat at freaking h&m so it was you know like 13 and supposed to fall apart like after i wore it three times but it's held up and it looks great and it's from h&m so it's not even like you got to drop a bunch of bunch of cash on it it's a pea coat it's gonna look really good um it keeps you really warm it serves its purpose as a super bulky either no that's a big thing with a lot of winter coats is you get that huge puff and like you look like you're wearing a trash bag not with the right yeah now i will say i we i did buy a coat like that when we went uh up to a friend's cabin yeah up in minnesota yeah you need that kind of you

need that because it's going to be i I don't, here's the only thing peacoat can't do. It's heavy wool so if it gets wet, you're going to die. That's the only thing about peacoat is that if you're living

in Chicago and there's snow on the ground like nine months out of the year and it touches the snow and gets cold, you die in it because it keeps it in you.

It's like a furnace. And also with like a puffy coat, you get that vacuum seal around your wrists and your waist. You don't get that with a peacoat coat you get that vacuum seal around your around your wrists and your waist you don't get that with a pico yeah that's that's all right but also that i don't actually necessarily love the puffy coat warmth i kind of get sweaty too much i get a little sweaty in there i get a little baked potatoe pico i can open it up i can do whatever what i really like about a pico this was my style when we were just on tour up in Philadelphia and New York, is that it was pretty cold, except for we'd get to wherever we were

going and then it would be kind of hot. I could wear a t-shirt underneath the peacoat. You can wear short sleeves underneath the peacoat. Peacoat's going to be fine. It's going to dress you up to that. It's going to step it up. It's going to step it up to that next level. And then you show up to wherever you're going, take your peacoat off. Now you've just like dropped it down a little bit and you're casual with your friends. I have a whole montage in my head of you in your hotel room wearing like a T-shirt and looking at your long sleeve shirts and then looking at your peacoat and then just like getting wild eyes and thinking, I don't have to wear a long sleeve shirt under this at all. I love that realization. It is so freeing. I tell you what also is like my number one jam. I don't actually necessarily have a great combination for this now, but living in Cincinnati and Chicago,

like every time I left the house, you know, I was wearing a hoodie under the peacoat. So bohemian. Yes. I love that look i fucking love that i discovered that look in chicago too yeah of wearing the hooded sweatshirt under a coat and then like a beanie on the head yes yes yes yes yes yes it's so good that's good fashion because in chicago it's never you get inside the place you're going and you're like now it's too hot it's still like it's still pretty cold in here. So I do need the hoodie on. But then if it is too hot, take the fucking hoodie off.

Griffin lives for cool weather fashion. I will say this about you. I feel like you always dress like it's a little colder than it actually is. And whenever I put on a sweater, for example, you get so excited. I do. I love it on you. I love you in a sweater. I do. I love it on you. I love you in a sweater. I do.

I can't deny it. It's coming up. It's about to be all sweater time. You're going to be wearing a sweater. Like one day, like we're going to be chilling on a Saturday with like maybe a window open and maybe got a crock pot of chili going. And I've got the sweater on. You've got a sweater on. My little cheeks are rosy. Oh, I've got the sweater on. You've got a sweater on.

My little cheeks are rosy. Oh, I can't wait, man. I can't wait. Big buttons are great. I like the big collar. That's fresh. So many pockets. Oh, my God.

So many pockets. Oh, like on the inside? I got one on the inside. On both sides, you can get the slit pockets, like the vertical pockets, and then the horizontal deep, deep, deep pockets. Love a picot because it gets to be middle of February here in Austin and now it's summer. I hang up the peacoat in the closet. Come October, I get the peacoat to put it back on.

What's that? I've got some fucking, you know, some Mike and Ikes in there. Maybe you got an iPod Nano. Maybe you have an iPod Nano or an iPad Mini because those pockets are so dang big. Anyway, the peacoat. The peacoat has military origins, as you might imagine. You look at it, it's kind of a military cut. Yeah.

They would wear this in the Navy. The first time it appeared in American newspapers was in the 1720s, although it was a European Navy garment first, worn by sailors. There's a variation called the bridge coat, which is just like a little bit longer. It goes down right to the thighs. And, you know, if you didn't want to freeze to death standing on a boat in the middle of the Arctic, like you would wear one of these dope ass jackets and look super, super cool. If you were, you know, a decorated officer, you would wear a variation of it called a reefer, which just means that it has gold buttons and epaulettes uh which i i did not know about uh and what's wild is just like how little that style has has changed no it's so

classic i remember watching dunkirk and while i was watching dunkirk i was like this is fucking peacoat city all these chaps are wearing the most beautiful peacoats. The peacoat budget for this film must have been like off the chains unless they did like a bulk pickup from H&M and it still looks like I could grab any one of those off one of these unfortunately deceased Navy fighters and

throw it on my own body which one character does in the movie, no spoilers, and look fresh as hell. Yeah. Even though it's from you know whenever that movie took place i think it was one of the world wars probably one but maybe two uh anyway uh i love it i love it oh p the pea coat the name pea coat uh there is an academic journal of nautical research that's called the mariner's mirror that's first of all it's really incredibly powerful uh and in a 1975 edition of the mariner's

mirror they tracked the etymology of the term pea coat uh and they they traced it to a dutch word which is pea jacker i know that i'm probably saying that wrong in which uh pidge is a coarse twilled blue cloth while jacker is jacket or coat or whatever. Although the U.S. Navy has their own sort of etymology, which is that the cloth that like Navy folks used to wear in cold weather was called pilot cloth, which was essentially the same thing, you know, twilled, coarse blue cloth, which is, you know, essentially like the wool garment that pea coats are made out of. But because it was called pilot cloth, they would call it a pea cloth or pea jacket. So yeah, no one knows for sure.

History debates it. It's just like a formality chameleon, the pea coat. If I go to a nice restaurant, I can be like, please hang up my pea coat alongside the other nice jackets that those fancy people have brought. Because that's it. Oh, that's a p-coat from h&m so be gentle with the stitching it's incredibly fragile because it's not very well made

what's your second thing my second thing is one of those things that when i thought of it i got really excited to talk about it which is um because it's just it's universally enjoyable i just said which is but it made it sound like i said witches how did you get oh wow no it's the guinness book of world records just the whole thing not one specific person just the whole thing i mean i'll get to some people okay for sure i love it um guinness book of world records do you remember this as a kid like discovering this existed and thinking it was the best thing in the world. Yes, absolutely. Especially when we were kids before the internet and you couldn't just like look stuff up.

This book like held all of the exciting information you really wanted to know. I remember going to Pigeon Forge or was it Gatlinburg that has a like Guinness Book of World Records like museum. And it was like a full like tourist trap like here's the longest long jump ever recorded how far can you go on it and it's like not even close because i don't know anything about jumping uh so i want to tell you the origin and then we'll get to some of the good stuff i'm very curious okay so um i'm gonna say a name and it's going to be kind of a funny name and so i want you to ready yourself okay is it going to say a name, and it's going to be kind of a funny name, and so I want you to ready yourself, okay?

Is it going to be funnier than Pee Jacker? Because I messed that up, I think, pretty bad. Yes, it is. Okay. In the 1950s, Sir Hugh Beaver... H-U-G-H? Yep. I'm just going to give you a little time on that one.

Okay. I'm good. I'm good. He was the managing... I'm not good. I'm just going to give you a little time on that one. Okay. I'm good. I'm good. He was the managing... I'm not good. I'm not good. It's a funny name. He was the managing director of Guinness Brewery, and he attended a shooting party with his

friends where everyone started arguing about what the fastest game bird in Europe was. A shooting party? Yes. That's a bad party. You know, like they go to shoot pheasants or whatever, and they're all sitting there talking about what the fastest bird is, and they can't decide. But that's called hunting. Whenever my friends, it would be deer season or whatever, they wouldn't be like, time to

go have a woodland shooting party. Well, shooting party may just be like, you all stand there, we release the animals, and you shoot them. Oh you shoot them. I'm not 100% on that, but it's possible that that's the distinction. How sporting. In 1954, he developed a Guinness Book of World Records and around the idea that it was affiliated with Guinness because it would help settle pub arguments. I had no idea that it was the beer. You just thought Guinness, that was just a coincidence? It's a name, like, it's just a word. I never really put it together. And you never, I feel like I've never seen the two of them in the same room.

No, that's true. That's true. So before I get into some of the records, I wanted to talk about some of the criteria. So the way it works, people submit applications to be considered. And right now the waiting period for applications is up to 16 weeks. Huh. Okay. And in order to submit a competitive application, what you submit has to be measurable, has to be replicated so that

people can break it and can be proven, obviously. And then you have to have kind of an awareness of whether anyone in the world has done it better, you know, obviously, if you're going to submit. Do you have to pay also with your submission, I imagine? I did not look into it that far. Okay. So it's a profit gain. Although I did notice that, you know, so there's a maximum of 16 weeks,

but they said like for emergency consideration, you can like expedite your application, which makes me think there is money involved. But also I wonder what is the emergency situation? Yeah, I know. I've been on fire for an hour. And then there are also, there are guidelines as to what is not suitable um obviously things that could cause harm or endanger animals one of them is excessive eat that one's funny given the origins of the book

no we don't want anybody endangering any more animals we figured out what the funnest bird to shoot and kill in the sky is and then that was the last one uh i want to talk about excessive eating okay so now instead of saying who can eat the most it's who can uh consume a large quantity in a small period of time interesting so the idea is so for example let me give you an example were people getting hurt like is it a liability thing i think i mean you know it's a way of endangering yourself yeah sure so for example in 2014 uh tokaru kobayashi ate uh 12 hamburgers in three minutes uh so that's kind of what they're talking about right short time frame you know eat as much as you can okay that's interesting it makes complete sense

because i see some of those like man versus food eating challenges and just like it seems like a like a path for uh extreme disaster yeah like like if somebody became very, very ill trying to break this record, I think Guinness would feel a little responsible. Yeah, well, they wouldn't because they're a huge, huge faceless company, but somebody probably would along the chain. Low on that. No wasting food, which is questionable. What?

They suggested that you have to kind of balance how you might waste food with how you would donate, you know, materials to replace. If this is like my Boy Scout troop, maybe the world's biggest bowl of borscht, then somebody like Sir Alec Guinness would roll up and be like,

that's dope. That's dope. Great job. But who's eating all this borscht? Is Alec Guinness affiliated with the Guinness brewery? No, but they probably hired him because of the name.

Okay. Is he just dead, yes? I don't know. I don't know either. Nobody does. No consumption of alcohol as part of the records. Guys? I know.

It's complicated. What? Well, they don't want people to binge drink and end up in the hospital trying to beat some kind of... Right. That makes sense, too. It's just like that is... Except for our one very creamy, very dark, delicious devil's beverage. So let me get into some of the records here oh boy biggest muscle is griffin heaviest no i see what you did there biggest strongest muscles is griffin

austin texas heaviest carrot 22 pounds i'm just gonna go through these i'm just gonna just shout these out okay uh yeah i'll holler if there's one I need more. Most M&Ms eaten in one minute blindfolded with chopsticks, 20 in 2011. That's nothing. Doesn't that seem achievable? That seems incredibly doable. I'm inspired by that one. Is it possible to just stab downward into them very sharp with sharp chopsticks?

I doubt it. Okay. I doubt it. Longest time in plank position, eight hours and one minute. In plank position. Isn't that just laying down? No, that's when you're kind of propped up, like your toes are on the ground and your elbows are...

They should call it something else. I thought this was interesting because this was like a competition that was held. And the longest guy got eight hours and one minute and he beat out the other guy who only got seven hours and one minute and he beat out the other guy who only got seven hours and 40 minutes. So this dude went hard in the paint for an extra 20 minutes, just rub it in? Okay. Largest collection of Pokemon memorabilia,

17,127 items. Griffin McElroy. I looked at this, so this was verified in 2016 when they asked the winner, Lisa Courtney, what was on her wish list. She told us, I'm still searching for the Pokemon Center deluxe size Tyranitar plush. Oh, yeah. Do you know what this is? That's a tough one.

That's a tough one. That's going to put Henry through college, this Tyranitar plush I've got. Longest Mario Kart marathon is 40 hours. And that's three guys in Iowa City in 2018. All got together. That seems exceedingly doable. That seems like I may have accidentally broken that one. There is one gentleman who has set more than 600 records himself and currently holds 200 active titles.

My God. He is 62 years old. He lives in New York. himself and currently holds 200 active titles. Oh my god. He is 62 years old. He lives in New York. His name is Eshrita Furman. His first record was doing 27,000 jumping jacks over 6 hours and 45 minutes. That's a

lot. That's a lot. I've just decided. That got him a spot in the 1980 edition of the Guinness Book of World Records. He has broken a record on every continent. Other records include most fire torches lit and extinguished in one minute, fastest mile on

a pogo stick, longest time to hula hoop underwater, most arrows broken with the neck in one minute. Most arrows broken with the neck in one minute. Most arrows broken with the neck. I haven't seen a video, but I have to imagine he is either putting them on his shoulder and snapping them. I mean, he's not doing it long ways,

because that's a good way to die. That seems like some of those, though, I feel like I could call up Guinness tomorrow. I mean, here's the thing, though. That can be replicated. It can be measured. That's fine. That seems like some of those though, I feel like I could call up Guinness tomorrow. I mean, here's the thing though, that can be replicated. It can be measured. That's fine. That's fine.

I'm just saying I could call up Guinness tomorrow and be like, hey, just so you know, tomorrow morning I'm planning on trying to see how many Kit Kat bars I can sit on in one minute. And I think it's going to be like 35. So you may want to get your photographers down here for this. The last one I took note of is greatest distance traveled on a bicycle balancing a milk bottle on his head it's just like most yo-yos yelled at in five minutes uh one i personally found mind-boggling. So heaviest triplets.

Hmm. This happened in the great country of the United States. Three triplets. One was eight pounds, nine ounces. One was seven pounds, five ounces. And the other was six pounds, 13 ounces. These are like big old full-size babies in one person. Triplets are usually quite smaller, yes.

Triplets are usually pretty tiny because they all have to fit in a person. Right. Those are big babies. That's a lot of babies. That's a lot of babies. That's much babies, folks. I mean, so for context, Henry was 6 pounds 9 ounces. He is smaller than the smallest baby in that than that that group of three we're

talking about having fully if i'm doing the math right about 22 pounds worth of baby inside you that's rough stuff man um there there if you go to their website there's a lot more stuff on there it's just it's so fun for somebody that enjoys like statistics and and facts and like and and just oddities this is like everything all in one yeah so good look out for me i'm gonna go do how many napkins can you how many paper towels can you pull out of a paper towel dispenser at the austin airport i'm gonna do that one tomorrow looking forward to it in one minute so gonna be great uh you want to know what our friends at home are talking about yes please well i will do that once my computer unlocks they're talking about ali specifically he's talking about uh my small wonder is that

our two and a half year old daughter has started saying it it's just farts, all exasperated, a la Jerry Gergich, whenever I ask if she pooped. That's perfect. That's good. That's really good. Henry started to acknowledge that he farted when I asked him if it's a poop. And he hasn't necessarily landed that Jerry Gergich cadence. Yeah. But he does say fartotted, which is great,

because he sounds like Ben Affleck. He sounds like fucking Matt Damon in Good Will Hunting. Yeah, fotted. Lauren says, hello, my small wonder is finally getting past a difficult boss fight in a video game after being stuck on it for a while. The feeling of accomplishment is great, and the game usually rewards you with cool new stuff making it even better trying to think of something that you would find dr robotnik yeah he's one he's one i don't know that dr robotnik gives you this sort

of soul satisfaction like when you jump on his head you hit him with your head a bunch of times and he blows up that's true it's pretty great did you ever do that and then you were like oh and now i retire on top i mean i never beat sonic so i never felt i never did either you know that was one of those games where you just started the very beginning every time and it was so fast it was very fast i want to leisurely stroll fast shoes give me a a bonk any day of the week. You know what I mean? I don't know what you're talking about now. Give me a Mario anytime. Do you know what I mean? That's all I have for submissions.

And I do want to say thank you to Bowen and Augustus for these for our theme song, Money Won't Pay. You can find a link to that in the episode description. Can you give out the email for our submissions again? Yes, it is wonderfulpodcast at gmail.com, I believe. I'm going to double check that while Rachel extols the virtues of Maximum Fun. Thank you to Maximum Fun for hosting our show

on the network. That's MaximumFun.org. You can find a lot of really great shows there. Shows that are comedic and also shows that are informative like Bullseye, for example. Great, great interviews on there. Beef and Dairy Network.

There was a great one with Daveed Diggs recently. Oh, yeah. I still haven't listened to that one. Beef and Dairy Network is also very good. I think we're doing a promo for them, and it made me laugh. Anyway, it is wonderfulpodcast.gmail.com. So hit us up. Yeah.

Go to Mc macroy.family got all kinds of stuff we're working on some merch we're gonna have some merch do we have a projected we do not have a projected date the gears of of merchandising grind i got to see like a like a mock-up and i was very excited about that yeah we'll let you know we're looking forward to it uh anything else that we need to say that we need to talk about anything you want to get off your chest let's do our usual just sort of like venting the you know the the rage because it all can't be smiles and rainbows and you know thick dogs all the time sometimes rachel and i are filled with just

inky vitriol and now let's just start spewing it out. So you start. I'm real mad that they're only releasing one episode of Great British Baking Show a week. Yeah, rip them, baby. Because we watch that episode and then we have to wait a whole week. And that really grinds my gears. Really fucking tear them apart.

I ate a little bag of Doritos today like a fun size bag i haven't done that in god knows how long i don't remember like six of them in there six chips in there six freaking chips and you know how expensive food is at the airport what's up though so but it's so good. That's how they get you. It tastes good and it's convenient. That's how they get you, though. That it's right there.

And the Doritos did taste very good. Cool ranch, right? Cool ranch was good. Damn it, we're doing this show again. Bye. Hey! Hey!