Wonderful! - Wonderful! Ep. 16: Greg Claus

Episode Date: December 20, 2017

Rachel's favorite new Christmas movie! Griffin's favorite three notes from a Christmas song! Rachel's favorite kind-of-sad Christmas song! Griffin's favorite Christmas present ever! Music: "Money Won't Pay" by bo en and Augustus - https://open.spotify.com/album/7n6zRzTrGPIHt0kRvmWoya MaxFunDrive ends on March 29, 2024! Support our show now by becoming a member at maximumfun.org/join.

Hi, this is Rachel McElroy. Hi, this is Griffin McElroy. And this is wonderful. Who's that in the studio? Greg. I'm Greg, a deep-voiced stranger who stumbled into your house because I'm very drunk. Greg with that red suit and that white beard. I thought maybe...

The beard is nothing. It's out of my control. And the red suit's my drunk suit. I thought maybe The beard is nothing. It's out of my control and the red suit's my drunk suit. I wear it for comfort. Oh, and I bet you're wondering what's in my big bag. It's full of toys for

children. Now I understand the confusion. Can I use your John? I'd rather you didn't, Santa Greg. I'd rather you didn't, because I don't know what you're going to do in there. The last time we allowed a stranger to use our John. Oh my gosh, that really happened. It really did happen, and it was a real bad day for us.

It ruined Christmas. It probably wasn't on Christmas. We never got to the bottom of that mystery, either. No, but they got to the bottom of our fucking toilet. Yeah, you say that, but whatever they did, they cleaned up. This is a really crude introduction for what is essentially going to be our Christmas episode. So real quick, we're not going to have an episode out next week. We are traveling for the holidays.

We're going back to Huntington. It's Henry's first time to the great and beautiful state of West Virginia. And I'm so excited to take him there. But we are going to be traveling for a long time, and we're not going to have time to get an episode out next week. So this is going to be our Christmas episode, and we hope that you enjoy it. We don't really have a format, per se, as much as we had for our Thanksgiving one. Yeah, I want you to talk about what Christmas was like in the McElroy household very quickly.

Yeah, I mean, it was dope. Like, it was really great. to talk about oh what christmas was like in the mackawai household very quickly yeah i mean it was dope like it was really great our family was like really really great growing up i had a very good family growing up and we were all very loving and very uh caring and so for christmas we got that like usual sort of commercial stuff where i got so psyched out of my mind for Christmas presents. We were not, I think, like remotely spoiled kids at all. Like we, I never just like got random stuff. And I feel like I've talked about this on the show before. And... Except for on Justin and Travis's birthday. Right. But that was a birthday present. It just wasn't there. It wasn't my birthday. I didn't get

a present. And so like, Christmas was great for that reason because it was like, oh shit, a bunch of toys and video games. Like video games are super expensive. And like I didn't have any money. I was a little kid. And so that was the time I got video games and I just sit around and play new video games like for a few weeks. These new video games that I just like cherish. And it was so exciting. Your Christmas Eve walk. these new video games that i just like cherish and it was so exciting your christmas eve walk so yeah that's the other thing is that in addition to like that thing that i got like my my crass child heart got very excited for uh we would we had so many traditions including a christmas eve walk which we still do where me and my brothers and my dad would just walk around the block a few times and talk about the year and talk about what kind of year we had and what we had hopes for for the next year and i didn't realize how long this tradition had gone on i knew that it was happening when i met griffin but i was watching some of his old home movies and there is footage of them all bundled up as kids getting ready to go on real cute real cute

stuff you think that was just like peace of mind for your mom. Like get these kids out of the house. Yeah, it's a really nice thing to do. Last year was a bit, I imagine this year's walk too will be a bit harrowing. Like let's break down the year. Oh, fuck. But yeah, it's a really nice tradition. And then like we just, I don't know, we loved each other so much. And we love each other so much. And so like getting together for Christmas is always so great great we'd have cinnamon and orange rolls on christmas morning i was gonna

say you've got christmas foods too that's really it justin's on this uh like great british baking show like tip now where uh on christmas he he likes to have a big uh big sort of british style luncheon or dinner with a a lot, you know, different puddings, mostly sort of a pudding based sort of affair. But yeah, like we go so hard on Christmas, and I look forward to it so much. And as a kid, it was literally the like, like center, like the arc stone, like the counterweight of my entire year upon which the entire year was sort of based. Yeah. What about you? I know you guys didn't go quite as hard. Yeah. So my family's

a little different, partially because we're small. You know, it's just me and my parents. I don't have any siblings. And then also, the kind of the bulk of the family comes in my mom's size. My mom is one of six. And all of her brothers and sisters live in the Missouri, Illinois area. So that used to be kind of our tradition. We would have our little Christmas at home or Christmas Day. We'd wake up, open presents. Was it always as intense as that one Thanksgiving I went to where like the whole damn family rolled up and filled up the entire house. Much bigger, actually. Whoa, damn. Yeah, much bigger. Because then we would go to

my mom's mom's house. Or as we got older, one of my aunts or uncle's house. And I had a lot of cousins that were very close to my age. So Christmas was just, it wasn't like everybody sat around and took turns opening presents. It was like throughout the day you would have people come up to you and hand you things. Oh, that's great too. It was just kind of a free-for-all. And that it was just like you had to catch the kids as they were throughout the house and hand them a present. Sounds like a fun Easter egg hunt, a child hunt for the adults. Usually they would sit down wherever they were, open the present, and then go back to playing.

So it was definitely fun, although as we got older and all those kids grew up, Christmas got smaller and smaller, and then it became less about presents and more just about eating a lot of food. Hey, ain't nothing wrong with that. Yeah. You want to get into it? I think you start this week. Oh, okay.

If you feel comfortable, if the Spirit's moving you in that direction, the good Christmas spirit. Yeah, I would say so. The Holy Spirit, maybe. I feel like these aren't going to be a surprise to Griffin. That's fine. I'm not the only one that listens to the show. Hopefully, hopefully they'll be.

I tried to pick some that weren't as classic, maybe. So we could potentially have some listeners. Rachel's like, what if we just do like deep cuts? And I was like, all right, fucking. I feel like every podcast has a Christmas show. And I wanted to bring something kind of. I mean, your charm, your wit. cuts and i was like all right fucking i feel like every podcast does a christmas show and i wanted to bring something kind of i mean your charm your wit your your luscious voice like you're bringing a lot to the table thank you griffin luscious was a bad yeah that was very sensual lewis

that's a word yeah it sounds a little bit like it sounds bad bad. Maleficent sounds bad. Maleficent, who was the villain in Sleeping Beauty, I want to say. And in the Snow White and the Huntsman. Oh, maybe it was Snow White. No, I think you're right. You think it's Sleeping Beauty? Yeah. Okay. I've played the Kingdom Hearts games.

What's your thing? Arthur Christmas. Arthur Christmas is the Kingdom Hearts games. What's your thing? Arthur Christmas. Arthur Christmas is a great little flick. Griffin and I just discovered this a couple years ago, which isn't that unique because it came out in 2011. Yes. So it's actually, it came out since we got together. It's fairly new. Man, it's been a while since there's been like a Christmas jam, huh?

Yeah. Like, Elf came out and people were like people like okay this one's going in the you know library of congress arthur christmas is a really great one obviously fred claus like you got like you it's not christmas without fred claus and i have that tattooed on my neck and now the christmas prince christmas prince has stepped in here and filled up thank you baby for reminding me of christmas prince and christmas inheritance netflix has just decided like hey by the way we're hallmark now like yeah we've already we've become marvel and we've become amc and now we're also hallmark please enjoy the christmas prince yeah arthur christmas came out 2011 it is a production uh in partnership with

sony pictures and a ardman animation talk about ardman because you you sort of turned me on to big ardman fans so i um gosh i'm maybe middle school i know early high school became a big wallace and gromit fan uh so ardman kind of got its start in claymation and then turned to animation uh they're still doing Claymation. They have a new feature that I saw a trailer for before Star Wars. And it's, I forget what it's called, but it's about like people in the stone age battling against people from the bronze age.

Oh, that's kind of fun. Yeah. So I, I really like Wallace and Gromit. I like Aardman stuff. It, they also did like chicken run,

which is a more recent thing. I think their first 3d animated feature was Flushed Away, I want to say. Yeah, that's right. Which is about a mouse that goes on a toilet adventure. I haven't seen that one. How wondrous. I have to imagine it's better than... What a magical journey into the toilet.

And how many poo-poo jokes do you think they do? Probably like seven. Yeah, that's probably why I haven't seen it. So, Arthur Christmas set on Christmas night. The film tells a story about Santa Claus's clumsy son, Arthur Claus, who discovers that the Santa's high-tech ship has failed to deliver one girl's present. And so he sets out to go on a mission to save her Christmas. And it's such notable voices as hugh laurie

uh bill nye i never said yes you've you've done it perfectly okay good uh you know who else is in it evil angoria yeah laura linney hey uh and it's who plays fantastic i don't think you said who plays arthur christmas oh uh james mcavoy oh yeah i don't know you said who plays Arthur Christmas. Oh, James McAvoy? Oh, yeah. I don't know him super well, so I didn't really know. He plays young Professor, like sexy Professor X in the X-Men movies. Yeah. I think he was in Atonement.

That was my Halloween costume one year. Sexy Professor X. Yeah, what I really like about it is like the like, half of the movie, maybe a bit less, it goes into, like, this wild, like, fictional version of explaining the logistics of the Santa Claus present delivery operation. Santa's or well, so there's several Santas. There's many Santas. There's Grand Santa, who's played by Bill Nighy, who's 136 years old and has since retired to his son, Malcolm, who is older and being seceded by Steve Claus, who is the eldest son. and that's Hugh Laurie, and very technologically savvy. And so the whole Christmas operation is done in this high-tech way. So there's this struggle between the three of them where Grandpa Claus is like, old school, like we just had the one wooden sleigh and the reindeer. Yeah.

And then it keeps modernizing. And it's like a a conversation about like modernizing the process of delivering presents to uh children in a world where population has increased so drastically i don't know i think it's so clever and so like uh so so interesting a lot of movies like a lot of christmas movies like tackle that idea and this is by far the most thorough of like here's how it happens yeah here's the technology we use here's the magic we use i found it very charming but then in that picture is arthur christmas who's like nobody he's like not in the chain of command really at all yeah he he handles as i recall he handles all the santa letters all the letters to santa uh but he has not been tasked with the big santa claus responsibilities

but it's so charming his quest his quest to save christmas for just this one person which is not really like a uh i don't know not really a storyline that i feel like a lot of christmas movies go for where it's just like the whole idea is that he everybody else has looked at this you know they've delivered presents to several billion children and say like it was a success right this one child is a a statistical anomaly nothing to even worry about but it is something to worry about because that one little girl can't have a bad christmas and so arthur christmas like takes it on himself to to actually arthur claus the movie's called arthur christmas well Well, I'll edit it in post.

I have this software where I can change words to sound like other words. It just has every word in your voice ready to go. And so you know how I say fudge so much on the podcast? This software sometimes takes a mind of its own. It makes it the bad one. Oh, no. Yeah, it's a really yucky toilet word word and i would never say it with my real mouth but every time i say fuck it changes it to you know what um so yeah so this has a 92 percent

on rotten tomatoes it's not just me that's a big it's really good i don't know it's a very good movie i i evangelize it a lot and i feel like it sounds so cornball it's hard to find we ended up just buying it because uh it's not i don't think it's streamable yeah you have to rent it it's it's hard to find we ended up just buying it because uh it's not i don't think it's streamable yeah you have to rent it it's it's it's just like a really interesting uh i don't know there's it builds this genuinely great family dynamic between the different clauses like a genuinely great one uh and and also sort of talks about the differences between generations and how that relates to, um, like technology and how we recognize the holidays and like what's important and what's special to us.

It doesn't in a really like a way that like you would not exactly expect from an animated feature film from the robot pants. Yeah. And it gets, it gets to kind of the whole initial idea behind Christmas. You know, I think part of what I like- The Christ Child. Well, no, not that part. But this idea that it's not this wide blanket of, like,

everybody has to get this many presents at this time just to fulfill the Christmas objective. It's more about, like, kind, the magical experience that little kids have and making sure that everybody gets that. It's pretty nice. God, it makes it, the ending makes me cry every time. I know, me too. It's so sweet. It's very sweet.

It is such a good, unappreciated gem. It's, I would rank it probably second behind Christmas Prince, actually third behind Christmas Prince and Christmas Inheritance. Christmas Prince is so buck wild. I cannot stress it enough. So there's a kind of bad- It's on Netflix now. It just came out. There's a kind of bad movie that I enjoy. This was not that for me.

Oh, I loved it. I loved every frame of it. There's a scene where the titular Christmas Prince is, this woman is, uh, the, the, this woman is a journalist, but she sneaks into this castle, uh,

pretending to be a tutor for a young, a young girl in the castle and falls in love with the Christmas Prince. And there's a scene where her and the little girl are looking out the window of the, the girl's bedroom, uh, looking at the Christmas Prince as he's practicing archery. And it sets up like the next scene where they shoot a bow and arrow and of course she does a silly bad job but

while they're looking at him do archery he's shooting like a bow at a target that is probably six feet away from him and it's the fucking funniest thing i've i've seen in a very long time yeah i had a fun time imagining kind of how they started filming that because i imagine the actor in like an effort to be a real professional tried to learn to shoot a boat and arrow himself and they just kept moving that target closer and closer and closer they also try to set up this like mystery with a twist ending close to the end that like ties up all the plot lines and it is the silliest easiest to solve puzzle yes um yeah it's it's a lot uh but it's it's enjoyable if you like the hallmark sort of milieu any other christmas movies i guess not i guess we should we should keep it going save for 2018 um i want to talk about something it's very specific okay the

thing i have brought is the three note horn stinger in the chorus of donny hathaway's this christmas the whole song is great the three note horn sort of stab right there in the middle of that chorus is one of the best fucking things i've ever heard in a christmas song this is one of my favorite christmas songs ever and this is the thing that kind of like makes it um i'm gonna just play a little bit i'm gonna play that stinger just so folks know what the hell i'm talking about if you've not heard this song go listen to donnie hathaway's this christmas uh but if you don't want to go listen the whole thing here's a little bit of it with that horn and just listen fire

sighs blazing bright we're caroling through the night And this Christmas will be A very special Christmas for me It's so good. This Christmas is one of my favorite holiday songs because it kind of subverts the expected holiday song formula. And a lot of that is in like the tone of the song. It is in a lot of ways just kind of a love song that takes place at Christmas.

It is a song about him sort of being in love with this other person and his excitement for that love making him think like this is going to be a great Christmas. for that love, making him think, like, this is going to be a great Christmas. And what I also love about it is that it's not about how great Christmas is. It is specifically about how great this Christmas is going to be, hence the name of the song. And that may sound like a silly distinction, but it's really powerful. The chorus goes, and this Christmas will be a very special Christmas for me. Like he's saying like this, I'm going to make this Christmas be a good Christmas and it's going to be a good Christmas cause I'm in love with you.

And that's so exciting. It's the perfect hype song. Like I, I can hear a lot of Christmas music and kind of, you know, feel a little bit of the spirit, but this one is like looking forward to Christmas and it gets you really, gets you really, gets you really psyched. A lot of songs are, it's, it's weird because a lot of songs are the subject of what you get excited

about for Christmas, right? Like, you know, Frosty the Snowman, you hear that song and you, it's supposed to get you excited for Christmas because it is inextricably linked from being a Christmas thing.

Like it's Christmas. So I hear Frosty. This one is about like what it is like to be excited for christmas and i think that that's like a different thing in entirely um so this christmas was released as a single in 1970 and it didn't find like hardly any success at all um and it wouldn't until long after uh donnie hathaway's death in 1979, a few different artists covered it in the years after it was released, including The Temptations, Gladys Knight and the Pips,

and Patti LaBelle, who, have you seen the video of Patti LaBelle? Yes. It is the 1996 White House Tree Lighting Ceremony, and Patti LaBelle gets up there to do a performance of this christmas which she had just released in uh her own christmas album wait have i seen this maybe i don't know okay uh she put out a christmas album called this christmas that had this christmas on it and she went on the the tree lighting ceremony in 1996 and they didn't have the words for her they're supposed to be like a a telepromp with the words on it, and they didn't have it. And she didn't like know a lot of the words. If by the way,

if you think this is leading up to me making fun of Patti LaBelle in any way, you are fucking out of your mind because she gets a little bit lost a bit in the beginning. She says like, where's my backup singers, trying to get the backup singers to step in and maybe help out. And she tries to get the audience to sing along with her then she just mostly vamps for like two and a half minutes and it is still the best shit ever uh go look up patty labelle this christmas no she never gives up she doesn't she's such a fucking professional uh diana ross also did a recording in 1974 that was uh not released uh until much much later in a Motown Records compilation. But in 1991, it was included the record label, which I don't remember the name of, I didn't

write it down. The record label that put out this Christmas put out this, I think it was called Soul Christmas, this collection of soul Christmas songs, and it included this Christmas. And after that, like it exploded and everybody covered it uh gloria estefan usher uh christina aguilera um destiny's child chicago harry connick jr aretha franklin uh celo green lady antebellum pentatonix a seal went to number one on the billboard charts with this christmas it only started became like this this christmas classic after it had been covered and covered and covered and covered by like everybody and now it is like widely recognized as as it should be a

christmas classic it is a absolute jam um so it's a great song but like i want to specifically talk about those three notes because they are they are inexplicable And if you want to talk about music theory and talk about a lot of... You don't get this a lot in Christmas music, where a way that musicians and composers get emotional effect out of their music is by adding unexpected elements to the song, unanticipated elements of the song that surprise you.

And that surprise comes in a lot of ways. And so in a lot of Christmas music, it's all major key, except for like, what are some minor key Christmas songs like O Come, O Come, Emmanuel, I think, I think is one of them. There's not a lot, right? But here in the middle of this, like, amazing, upbeat holiday song about love and the expectation of Christmas comes this wild horn stab, this minor chord run that happens right after he says the title of the song. And it happens in a way that almost sounds like suspenseful. Yeah, exactly. And it's Christmas.

Ba-ba-ba. Like, whoa. Yeah. Where did that come from? Yeah, like the villain has just entered the room. But it's so iconic. Like, I can't't when i think of this christmas i think that's a great song and oh shit those three notes hit so fucking hard

every single time it is and i don't know why it's in the song right like the song would still be great even without it but with it it's like it's just this little like this little like piece of salt on the candy and you eat it and you're like whoa whoa and it makes it taste better that is such a good analogy griffin thank you i i don't know i talk about this all the time whenever i talk about music on this show which is how wonderful it is when the smallest parts of songs can define them and establish the mood for the whole song using just a few notes and this christmas hits you with that that that stab in the middle and it just makes the whole it just makes the whole thing and it makes it like just a really really powerful

chorus and i love it so much and this christmas will be a very special christmas for me For me, yeah Should we steal me away? I don't know why I constructed it like that, but... I have an idea, but I have to go leave the room and come back to do it. Have you been planning this, or...? No, I just have an idea. All right. What if she comes back in and she's got a puppy? Oh, that's fun are you ready yeah yeah

why when you do it you always do it so loud look at the sound look at the waveforms i see the waveforms i was so loud i was so excited no i know this you've you've just hit me with like a dragon ball z blast of spirit just a uh a big kamehameha wave of spirit just shot through my chest and back through, we have a big hole in our house, there's a smoking crater of Christmas spirit right now. I am decimated by the holiday spirit. Okay, this message is to talk about the Love and Luck podcast.

Go to loveandluckpodcast.com for more information. Love and Luck is a queer love story with a touch of magic told via voicemails. Set in the LGBT community in Melbourne, Australia, Love & Luck is for people who like healthy relationships and happy endings. Short episodes are released weekly on Tuesdays.

There are also episodes available on YouTube with full hand-coded captions. That's loveandluckpodcast.com. That sounds fucking great. That is also such a good idea for a podcast it is really good like found footage, voicemail stuff that's awesome that's such a good idea

I'm gonna get it in Australia too the voices are gonna be so good I love Australia I love all accents equally and I'll have a, including the American accent. So you know I mean it. What was that?

I'm trying to cover my bases, I guess. This next message is for their little brother, Ross, future pharmacist. It is from Sarah in Japan. Kiddo, I just wanted to tell you how proud I am of you. You're such a kind, thoughtful, and overall wonderful dude. Sarah and Japan. Kiddo, I just wanted to tell you how proud I am of you. You're such a kind, thoughtful, and overall wonderful dude. And soon you'll also be a doctor. Hang in there, Cabe.

You're kicking pharmacy school's ass. All my love to you, Katie, and your pups and kitties. Aw, that is a sweet message. Good luck slinging those pills. Make sure that you put the three red pills on top of the red virus. It's the only way to beat the diseases. That was a Dr. Mario joke. Oh, I thought it was a pandemic reference.

That also. And I just want to be honest. I don't know that much about diseases or medicine outside of Dr. Mario or pandemic. And so that's my main thing. And thank you for doing what you do or else I would die from not having medicine. And great job. Are stacks of unread books taking over your apartment? Do you constantly miss your train stop because you're caught up in reading? I'm Bria Grant. And I'm Mallory O'Meara. We party hard. And by party hard, we mean read books. So join us every Thursdayursday on reading glasses a

maximum fun podcast about reading and book culture get more out of your reading life we'll help you conquer your to be read pile get out of that book slump and squeeze more reading time into your busy day learn how to read better wow that's good okay do you want my second thing more than the air that i breathe wow all right so if i don't say it i'll die from not breathing that's terrible yeah ruin christmas i hope probably not you can probably just go and open all the presents by yourself anyway including my presents you just want my presents don't you that's what this whole damn plan was about. So what's your second thing? My second thing is another song, actually.

It is Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas in the movie Meet Me in St. Louis. You said that so cute. And I'm not saying it in like a diminutive way, but you were just like, Merry Christmas. And it really, it really. It's my Midwestern twang. And this movie is just chock full of Midwestern twang. It's very true. I'm Jodie Garland.

Yeehaw. That's not what people in the Midwest, I don't own that. Okay. I'm not going to stand in that because I don't own that. This is a very pretty song from a very nice movie. Can you tell me everything about it, please? So Griffin and I have had lots of conversations before, just when we're sitting around the fireplace,

about what our favorite Christmas songs are. And this one's always like top two, three for me. I get it confused with I'll Be Home for Christmas, which is a different one. And a jonathan taylor thomas movie yeah and do you think that maybe we could do a quick pivot and just talk about the jonathan taylor thomas movie i'll be home for christmas have you watched that all the way through fuck yeah dude jtt so have yourself a merry go old christmas though is not jonathan was j was jonathan involved with this one? Okay. No it was significantly before his time. He's actually a time lord.

You know I can see that actually. That explains why we haven't seen him lately is that he's doing lots of time adventures. Time adventures with his companion

friend who is Zachary Ty Bryant. So can you walk people into what Meet Me in St. Louis which it's hard to say it like that because there's a very prominent song in it that's Meet Me in St. Louis, which it's hard to say it like that because there's a very prominent song in it that's Meet Me in St. Louis.

And that clang, clang, clang with the trolley. Isn't there a trolley accident in the movie? Isn't there a horrific, horrific trolley accident? Well, they say, yes, they say streetcar, I think, in that example. Okay. Which I assume is the same thing, but part of me wonders if there's a very slight difference between streetcars and trolleys. Probably not. Probably not.

There's a streetcar accident, and then it's a streetcar named On Fire. So the movie is about this family of three daughters. Their dad is a businessman. They all live in St. Louis. It's about to be the 1904 World's Fair in St. Louis. St. Louis is kind of like the height of the country at that point. That's where the toilet was first introduced. Did you do some research? No, baby, because what I just said is buck wild. So the movie Meet Me in St. Louis actually came out in 1944.

But it's set in this time period where St. Louis is kind of the happening place to be. And it's musical. And everybody's singing about love and St. Louis. And then the dad is going to be transferred. And so then the movie kind of takes a turn. And they're going to move and they don't want to leave St. Louis. No. Hey, can I ask you something? Yeah.

Does it trip you out at all when old movies are set in even older times than when the movies came out? There's a part of my caveman brain where it's like, this movie's in the 1904 World's Fair. And I'm like, whoa, this movie came out in 1904. But it didn't. What is an old movie to you, out of curiosity? Anything before Wayne's World, more or less. Do you know what I mean, though? I don't know that I have the sort of historical underpinnings required to be able to differentiate this was a movie that

people made in 1944 where they were like you know it'd be a real hoot what if we did a movie set in the olden days which to them was 1904 but to me 1944 is still wicked olden days same with like um uh it's a wonderful life like i have no idea when that movie was made, but it was sometime in the first probably four decades of the 20th century. Anyway, so. So did you like, what about when it's an old story, but it's modernized, like Romeo and Juliet? I don't understand. Like, oh, no, that's, are you asking me if i liked the leonardo dicaprio version of romeo and i was wondering if if it's an old story but told as if present day if you so basically

boz boz lerman's whole fucking scene um no not the best no not the best because it feels so like i don't know i guess i've watched a lot of those movies before like the version of Little Women with Katherine Hepburn like there are a lot of old movies about even older times it doesn't really trip me out so much yeah I guess not oh god you've got me thinking you've got me down a now what what drives me wild about that stuff it it's like, it's timeless. Like, the works of Shakespeare, like, when they're performed well, it's like, oh, that's how people talk. And it's timeless in a way. And so when you make it, I don't know, when you try to modernize it with JNCO genes, it's like, what are you fucking doing?

It was already pretty good. That's not to say that modern adaptations of old works are bad, but just these specific ones. Clueless is a modern adaptation of Emma, and I think Clueless is great. Well, that's different. I mean, that's an adaptation. This is just a straight-up production. It's not like straight dialogue. Yeah.

Anyway. So Mimi and St. Louis was made sometime, not now, about a different time before it. Yeah, again, not the reason that I'm talking about it this week. Yeah, let's get to that song. Yeah. So the song is supposed to be kind of a mournful song because they are celebrating their last Christmas in St. Louis. And Judy Garland is sitting with her younger sister, Tootie, and they are looking out the window at the snowmen they made that day.

And Tootie is sad because she knows that they can't bring the snowmen with them well tootie to be fair those snowmen were never going to be sort of a permanent fixture of the you understand that right too well she's very young actually the actress herself was not even 10 years old yet uh and i think her character is supposed to be even younger okay so it's not crazy that she wouldn't really have that realization. Know how snowmen work? No, I think by about six, you've probably got snow lockdown and how it functions in the springtime and summertime.

You know how in summertime you're playing around and you're at the beach and you don't see any snowmen? It is enough to form a causal link, I think, even in a young, young brain. Well, this is, I mean, that doesn't mean that it doesn't sound right. This is 1944. Maybe people weren't paying attention yet. They'd make big advances in refrigeration. Maybe she thought science was ready to bring the snowman wherever you wanted to go.

That's beautiful. And that's how the Yeti cooler got invented. How about it, science? So can you tell me about the song, Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas? So I've always thought it was a very beautiful song, partly because Judy Garland is a beautiful singer. She does a good job with her voice. And also there's this kind of sadness to it, but I think it's largely hopeful. I mean, the turn of phrase merry little christmas is like speaks volumes

to that because every other christmas song is like triumphantly praise the baby god or like let's blow this motherfucker up with holly like let's jam let's fucking jam holly in every hole of this thing and this one's like oh let's you know we're gonna get through this one's like, oh, let's, you know, we're going to get through this one. Yeah, that's a good point. And so interesting thing about this song. The original version was even sadder. Yes. And Judy Garland refused to sing it. She said, and I'm looking at an NPR story.

She said, if I sing that, little Margaret, who is the actress, will cry and they'll think I'm a monster. And the people that wrote the song, Hugh Martin and his writing partner, were like, well, I'm sorry you don't like it, but that's the way it is. And I don't want to write a new lyric. But they said, no, we've got to change it. In the songwriter's defense, it's a fucking sad scene. Like, it's a really, really sad scene. And the original version really doubled down on the, like, let's just get through this thing sort of style. So much so that when you hear the old lyrics and you hear the new ones side by side, the new ones don't sound sad at all.

They sound very, very happy compared to the old extremely sad and so i was talking to griffin about this and he actually found yeah i have the old lyrics okay so the original lyrics that uh hugh martin proposed for have yourself a merry little christmas which was originated i don't know if we hit this hard enough was originated by meet me in st louis as where it first appeared um which pay attention to how much plot is also in the original version of the song it's wild to think that if it had not been changed to these more upbeat lyrics it would not be a holiday classic because it is so intrinsically plot plot based and i really believe that okay so have yourself a merry little christmas it may be your last year, we may all be living in the past.

Have yourself a merry little Christmas. Pop that champagne cork. Next year, we may all be living in New York. Can you imagine being at the holiday party in Santa Fe? Just like, next year, we may all be living in New York. What? No good times like the olden days. Happy golden days of yore okay pretty good there

faithful friends who were dear to us sounds good so far will be near to us no more yeah that one's real dark too but at least we all will be together if the lord allows he might just kill one of us from now on we'll have to muddle through somehow. Now that is the most interesting line in the song. We'll come back to it. So have yourself a merry little Christmas now. From now on, we'll have to muddle through somehow is still a very, very sad lyric. Can you tell me the line that has been changed?

And it got changed by Old Blue Eyes. This is the one line. Actually, I think there's maybe a couple other things that got tweaked. But this is like the major revision that when Frank Sinatra did the song a few years later, this was the big tweak. Can you tell me what line was missing that replaces From Now On We'll Have to Muddle Through Somehow? I'm assuming the rhyme scheme is the same.

Yep. You got this. Does he replace muddle with, oh cuddle cuddle yes baby the song that we all know have yourself a merry little christmas with the line from now on we'll have to cuddle through hang a shining star upon the highest that's what frank sinatra sounds like just replaced it frank sinatra was like yo you did a good job cleaning it up de-saddening it it's still kind of a bummer that line is still kind of a bummer wait so what does he say sorry i was distracted by your beautiful voice from now uh hang a shining

star upon the highest bow yes of course so that line replaces that line so old blue eyes comes in and it's like let's i'm gonna punch it up a little bit more. And then that became sort of the version of the song. So I'm going to show that Judy Garland did a re-release Christmas album where she sang Sinatra's version. I just think this is so interesting. It went from this sad show tune that the actors refused to do. Do you want to say the other lines that were replaced? I think the other lines that were replaced in the... Because it's not new york anymore

you're right you're right uh i mean i feel like people know i don't think so i don't the lyrics to have yourself a merry little christmas but if not um how about instead of reading the lyrics of the song i can just play some from meet me in st louis great have yourself a merry little Christmas. Let your heart be light. Next year all our troubles will be out of sight. out of sight Yeah, so I for me that song has just always been one of my favorite Christmas songs.

It's not one that you hear on the radio a lot. There's been a lot of covers of it. Sure. I guess Sam Smith did one. I don't know anything about that, but okay. But Judy's my fave as far as that song goes, and I can't get enough of it. I watch Meet Me in St. Louis every Christmas time. We haven't watched it this year, though.

We have not. You want to knock that out tonight, you think? Trade some prezzies? Knock it out? Yeah, I think so. I like it. All right, let's do it. Can I do my second thing?

Yes. It's about the greatest Christmas gift of all time. I like it. All right, let's do it. Can I do my second thing? Yes. It's about the greatest Christmas gift of all time. Oh, okay. The greatest gift of all I got when I was nine. That's how the original song went. This is going to be sad to my parents who listen to this podcast. Can you not think of a greatest gift of all? Well, I can remember

specific Christmas gifts. Yeah. I don't know that I ever had the feeling of like, this is the best Christmas ever. Yeah, sure. But I also didn't get super into video games or anything like that. That's it. You gotta be into video games. Yeah. And speaking of,

I want to take you all the way back to Christmas 1996. Okay. Hop in my ship Hop in my magic timeshed That's not how the timeshed works It uses gears, it's steampunk inspired And you know that, look around the timeshed Do you see any buttons? It's brass levers I don't know how to make lever noises

Well try it now Shrub Shrub Shrub Gotta oil this thing hold on let me put some wd-40 in there all right try it again oh now that's a lever if i've ever heard one no don't pump it twice it's a dinosaur baby run take this bazooka uh okay okay now we're in christmas 1996 it's christmas 1996 jingle all the ways killing it in theaters so is jerry mcguire and scream both reigning supreme i believe

backstreet boys and in sync were battling it out i don't know if that's true on the music charts well no they there was no battle to be had because the spice girls were on top of all shit uh i was nine years old and the nintendo 64 had just come out in september it launched with just two games but those games were pilot wing 64 and super mario 64 so what else do you fucking need those two diamonds what is pilot wing oh no pilot wings is great it's like a game where you do a bunch of sort of aerial sports. So there's like a hang gliding little game and a helicopter game and a plane flying game and you do stunts and stuff. Pilotwings also had one where you had these just super jump boots and you jumped across like a very miniaturized version of America. Can I ask you another question?

I know you haven't even gotten to what you were going to say yet. Yeah. All the McElroy boys liked video games true how did your parents pick which boy got which present since you all were going to play it no we all had distinctive tastes oh okay yeah i think we all had different so not everybody wanted this nintendo 64 oh no we all wanted it and it was very much a group like okay this is for this is for the good boys uh launched with two games but a bunch more games came out in the months following. And that holiday season, the Nintendo 64 was impossible to find.

It was impossible to find. I think it was either 200,000 or 300,000 units for the whole country, which is nothing. And I remember it was like full-blown. It's appropriate the jingle all the way was in theaters because it was full fucking Turbo Man up in there. I remember a lot of our local like game stores because, you know, I had my ear to the ground, my finger to the pulse, like checking the Vegas odds on whether or not we were going to get an N64 for Christmas.

A bunch of our local shops were doing like lotteries for sales. It was like it was preposterously scarce. But it was all we wanted, like all that we wanted was a nintendo 64 so christmas rolled around christmas morning we opened up present after present none of the presents were nintendo 64 our parents did a full-blown christmas story oh i think there's one more present behind the entertainment center i love it out the flair for the dramatic in your house i watch watch the Nintendo 64 kids viral video. You know that one where they open it up and they're like, Nintendo 64! No, I don't.

Oh, shit. It's a big, it's a part of the cultural landscape. It's just two kids opening up a Nintendo 64 and just like losing their fucking minds. And it is, it's a big viral video. And like now it's like 20 years later where are those kids today and i watch that video and i think like god i'm glad my parents weren't filming us because it would have literally been us we've destroyed the house uh we were so psyched because we had given up hope we had essentially given up hope that we were gonna get an n64 um but there was one caveat and that is that it wasn't just the console that was very hard

to find. The games, which were cartridge-based, which was a big point of contention because the PlayStation, which had come out a year before, was disc-based, and it was like, oh, video games have to be on discs now. And Nintendo was like, no, you think you've got this thing cracked. It's definitely going to be cartridges. We need something for you to blow on. Yes.

You just shouldn't do that. Oh, really? Yeah, yeah, oh really yeah yeah wow i didn't know that you introduced moisture to the contacts oh okay what you really are doing when you take it out and blow on it all you're doing is just when you take it out and put it back in you're reseating the contacts it's those metal contacts that's what they did when you blow into you can rust it with your moisture your brain your brain is so big so the games were very hard to find they were also really expensive the standard price of a nintendo 64 game back then was 70 dollars oh my gosh the standard msrp on like a new triple a game that comes out these days is like 60 bucks uh but some of them were 70 most of them were 70 70 in the mid 90s is like 150 today it's

an yes it's preposterously expensive. Turok the Dinosaur Hunter was like this big 3D shooter. It was $80. Oh my gosh. It is wild. And so my parents, they filled our dark Nintendo 64 needs, but they only found one game for us to play. And that game was Wayne Gretzky's 3D Hockey. Oh, I love this so much.

And that game was Wayne Gretzky's 3D Hockey. Oh, I love this so much. And I know you're wondering, did they buy this for us because we were particularly huge hockey fans? No. I had, for Sega, I had NHL 96. NHL 96 was the best one. Oh, okay. That's a good hockey game.

What was Wayne Gretzky's game? Was it just all Gretzky in every position? Yeah, it was just a bunch of Gretzky clones. No, it was just like a 3D, okay, 3D hockey game. Where like a lot of those like early Nintendo 64 games, you play them now and it's like, yo, but you played it back then and it was like, oh, okay, this is, these are 3D graphics. I've never seen these before. We should have brought your dad on so he could do a little director's commentary on this episode. I mean, I can explain it. We found aintendo 64 and it was super hard to find that there were

literally there were literally there were no games available and so we bought the only game that was available so you guys would have something to play and it was wayne gretzky's 3d hockey and let me tell you something we played the fucking shit out of wayne gretzky's 3d hockey we played it like wild eventually a couple weeks later we found shadows of the empire which was the big star played the fucking shit out of Wayne Gretzky's 3D Hockey. We played it like wild. Eventually, a couple weeks later, we found Shadows of the Empire, which was the big Star Wars shooter, which was very exciting. Not like a huge game. We probably beat it like 50 times in the next month or so because it was like, again, that and Wayne Gretzky's 3D Hockey were the only games that we had. I think it wasn't until like February that we actually found a copy of Mario, which

if memory serves, we were on a wait list to rent it at Blockbuster. That is how scarce these games were. But we got it and we checked it out for a very, very, very long time. But like all that is said, I like, I was so appreciative back then,

right? It was, it was, we had given up hope that we were going to get this mythical Uber present that we were never going to get it. Cause it was so rare and not that many, that we were never going to get it because it was so rare and there were not that many. But we were so grateful to get it, even with our one sort of weird choice of a game. And today I am grateful because I cannot imagine the lengths that my parents went through.

Oh my gosh, I am picturing your dad driving across state lines. Fighting Sinbad. The whole way. Because since I've gotten old enough to do my own Christmas shopping. That's a jingle all the way reference. Yeah. Just so you all don't think the McElhoys have a beef. My dad actually does have a longstanding beef with Sinbad.

Since we've been doing our own Christmas presents and buying them for everybody, especially as our family's gotten larger, I understand what an ordeal it can be to secure everything that people need. I don't think we do, though. I think with Amazon now. It's definitely a lot easier. Yeah. I've never attempted to do something like this because it's work. It's a full-time job to find the turbo man. We've never had to drive from store to store to track something down.

But I know that's what my parents did. And they did it so that we would be happy. And we would have this crystalline moment of like childhood joy. Oh my gosh, yes. And like, hey, mission accomplished. I'm talking about it on a podcast about things that I love. Yeah. Fucking 21 years later.

And that's what they hoped, I'm sure. They were like, you know, one day, 20 years from now. It's probably not what they hoped. But yeah, I loved it back then. And today I see it as like a story of like, my parents just trying to do something very nice and very difficult for their kids. Yeah, that's wonderful. Even though we played the most hockey we would ever play in our entire lives that those few weeks with the Nintendo 64. And that explains why you love hockey so much today.

Nope. Do you want to hear some, some submissions from folks? And why you're such a big Gretzky fan. Huge G head. Here's one from Erica who says, one of my favorite things about this time of year is the smell of the wreath on my parents' door. They have a storm door.

So the wreath smell gets trapped between the wooden door and the storm door and when i arrive home for christmas i always open up that outer storm door and inhale deeply that incredible wreath smell it's wonderful this is this is an incredible technology you create like a little stink pocket for that wreath to really do its thing and you open it up and it's like it's like a car fresh air freshener like it's like thrown in your eyes and i love it my uh my mom sends uh all family members wreaths every year but we don't have that stink bubble around we don't but it is i mean you can't smell it when you go yeah it's very nice uh here's one from caitlin who says something i find wonderful as an aussie listener is summer christmas since christmas is so tied to winter and snow as a southern hemisphere dweller

i often i used to feel a little left out of holiday traditions I saw on American and British TV shows. Over the years, though, I find the summery twists on holiday classics more and more delightful. Christmas Day on the Beach, Santa in board shorts with zinc on his nose, Summer Berry Pudding served cold with cream, Water Balloon Fights on Christmas Eve, and my favorite, A Guy Dressed as Santa Visiting My Street on a fire truck instead of a sleigh and giving out lolly bags. Are just some of the Aussie Christmas quirks I find wonderful. I am in heaven right now. What are lolly bags?

I mean, I'm assuming bags full of lollipops, but let's check in on that. Lolly bags? A lolly bag? What's a lolly bag what's a lolly bag uh it's an australian term for speedos which is very funny but that's not what it is but that's not what it is it's like little bags of candy i guess just a little bag full of candy that's awesome this is very good thank you very much for saying this one and it is so pure um here's one last one from Kimberly, who says, I wanted to share a wonderful holiday tradition in my family that I just learned the name for, the Feast of the Seven Fishes.

Basically, it's an Italian-American Christmas Eve tradition that has roots in southern Italy. The number seven is kind of arbitrary. The feast ranges from three to 13 kinds of fish, including lobster, eel, smelt, clams, et cetera. My family pretty much limits it to pasta and clam sauce. We've always had it as a side and I never knew its history until this year. Hardcore Roman Catholics abstain from meat before Christmas, so they eat a ton of fish before midnight mass on Christmas Eve. Aren't holiday traditions wonderful? As I get older, I love

learning more and more about my Italian heritage, especially food related tradition. That does sound so great. Yeah, I have never heard of this. I had never heard of it either until I looked into it after reading this submission that Kimberly sent in. And it's, yeah, it's, I don't know the exact days, but there are days where Roman Catholics are not supposed to eat meat with, like, fat in it. And so they go fish wild. And I guess that this is, like like the most fish wild they get.

Sounds good, though. Fish wild trademark, Griffin McElroy. Fish wild, the Outkast musical. And the next Netflix Christmas special. The next Netflix original series, a fish wild Christmas. No, this sounds really nice. Yeah. And very appetizing, actually.

I'm very hungry. Okay, I think that's it. Yeah? Yeah. If you haven't joined our Facebook group, I would recommend it. It's especially great after you listen to the podcast if you want to share your own experiences related to our show. Yeah. It's a great place to do it.

If you have, like, international holiday traditions, or traditions or fuck it, just like whatever your holiday tradition, the Australian one will like blew my mind and I thought was so wonderful. So yeah, share those. And I'm curious, any of your holiday traditions, I want to know all about them. Thank you to Bowen and Augustus for the use of a theme song.

Money won't pay. You can find a link to it in the episode description. You want to thank maximum fun. I do want to thank Maximum Fun. If you are looking for other great podcasts to listen to, maybe you've got a long travel plan for the holidays, I would recommend

going to MaximumFun.org. There are a lot of great shows. I was listening to Pop Rocket because they did their own Hanukkah special last week, which was great. Very good. I think that is going to do it for us.

Again, we're not going to have an episode out next week, so enjoy the week off from hearing our voices. Yeah, Griffin. That was a dunk on us, I guess. Yeah, sorry that we're just... It's basically when you and I talk talk it's just burps is what we

get a lot of feedback we get not you you have the honey dipped voice of the sweetest angel but me they say i sound like a big burp man that crawled out of a sewer to fart into a microphone they say that on the apple itunes oh and it's a five-star review but they say griffin i love the honey dipped sweet angel voice of Rachel but Griffin sounds like the burp man this is a reminder that if you don't think

Griffin is the burp man please review us I mean you can say I'm the burp man as long as we get those five stars that's really all that matters it helps a lot

okay that's it have a good holidays bye bye oh it's back oh I destroyed it. Money won't pay. What's going on? Money won't pay. What's going on?

Money won't pay. What's going on? Money won't pay. Maximumfun.org Comedy and culture. Artist owned. Listener supported. I'm Allegra Ringo. And I'm Renee Colbert. And we host a podcast called Can I Pet Your Dog?

Renee, can I tell you about a dog I met this week? I wish that you would. In turn, though, can I tell you about a dog hero? May I tell you? About a dog breed in a segment I like to call Mutt Minute? I would love that. Could we maybe talk about some dog tech? Could we have some cool guests on, like Lin-Manuel Miranda, Nicole Byer, and Ann Wheaton?

I mean, yeah, absolutely. I'm in. You're on board. What do you say we do all of this and put it into a podcast? Yeah, okay. You think? All right. Should we call it, like, I don't know, Can I Pet Your Dog? Sure. All right. What do you say we call it like i don't know can i pet your dog

sure all right uh what do you what do you say we put it on every tuesday on maximum fun or on itunes sounds good to me meeting's over