Can You Don't? | New Cat. Two Pencils. Lobster. Taco John's.
Episode Date: December 31, 2025We can understand stealing expensive things like diamonds, watches, jewelry... but a ton of lobster?! Let's talk about that, wrapping your ki...
Can You Don't? is a weekly, comedic podcast where Joe Paisley and Bryan Albrandt delve into the depths of the Internet in order to retrieve the best and worst examples of humanity, while openly mocking themselves along the way for being complete idiots.
183 episodes transcribedWe can understand stealing expensive things like diamonds, watches, jewelry... but a ton of lobster?! Let's talk about that, wrapping your ki...
For the most part, going to church is a pretty chill experience. And most definitely not high up on the list of places you'd expect to get ki...
Every time I go to upload the episode this week, I get an error. So I'm sick of rewriting a witty episode description. If this ends up being...
When you have a late-night hunger craving, sometimes it's hard to suppress it. But if that craving ends up causing a felony level of damage i...
AI has the power to do a lot of good for the planet... but doesn't it feel like we can all agree that implementing AI into kid toys at this s...
We have all been in intense arguments over something stupid. However, those arguments don't usually end in gunfire over how many eggs a chick...
LALALALALALALALA! Whatever. DOOOOOOOOOOON'T CAAAAAAAAAARE!*** Wanna become part of The Gaggle and access all the extra content on the end of...
Advertising has always been a little out of control, but making people watch ads in order to wipe their ass might be just a bit over the line...
AI is being implemented in all facets of our lives, which is great, unless you're listening to an episode of this podcast. Then it's bad. Let...
Have you ever voted on behalf of your dead mom, got caught, and were forced to write a ten-page essay on what an idiot you are? Would you rat...
There comes a point when trying to help people who have lost everything that the entire situation would have been better off had you done lit...
How much weight do you think the position of "Volunteer Swan Warden" holds on a resume? Let's talk about that, trying to go about your everyd...
Nothing really brings the boys together like wearing racing jackets, being obnoxiously loud, and cheering on your sperm as it races against y...
If aliens offering immortality landed on Earth tomorrow and were willing to take you on a tour of the entire universe BUT you could never ret...
Joe might run for Mayor. And his entire platform will be built around upgrading ONE GODDAMN THING THAT HAS BEEN LEFT BEHIND SINCE 1995! Let's...
How are serving sizes set? BECAUSE NO PERSON ON PLANET EARTH WOULD CALL THAT AMOUNT AN ACTUAL SERVING! Let's talk about that, taking the wron...
We've never had sex with a hamburger... but maybe we will after today's episode. Let's talk about that, the worst advice from an implied expe...
Bryan is so close to shoving something in his butthole. Let's talk about that, the embarrassment of getting stuck in a tube slide as a grown-...
I think we all know that feeling when you just NEED to have a drink... but I'm not sure if stopping for beer while on your way to the hospita...
The future of relationships is going to be a little nutty. Imagine being with someone who only caters to your wants, needs, and world view......